A/N Welcome to my newest fic! I do realize I have 2 fics going already but for this one I have a couple of updates saved which means regular updates.

This fic is something new for me, especially concerning its form. Those of you liked a strong Meredith from my former fics should like this version as well

Hope this story makes you smile and sometimes tugs at your heartstrings.

A thousand different and conflicting emotions shook her soul as she halted in the entrance of the bustling Emerald City Bar. A part of her felt like curling up in a corner and crying her eyes out. It was not like it supposed to be, it was not what they promised to each other. But that was only a tiny part of her, one that never had the upper hand when the forces struggled inside her.

Because another part of her, the part that tended to make people step out of her way, that part wanted to strangle him, to wipe that cocky grin from his pretty face, to knock him over that empty head so his stupid perfectly styled hair stood up in all directions, to give him a foul black eye with her clenched fist. The ring on her finger would certainly leave a nice pattern on his face. However, she would never dare to disrespect the engagement ring previously belonging to Carolyn that way. She just had to find a different way to vent her anger. In a few purposeful strides, she crossed the distance between the door and the animated table occupied by Derek, Mark and Alex, currently entertained by some chicks who had three things in common – platinum blond hair, visibly oversized boobs and apparently no reservations.

"I need that more than you do," Meredith apologized to a man sitting at a table on her way, kidnapping his glassful of beer. She got closer to Derek's table and her blood boiled seeing one of the women sneaking her claws dangerously onto his shoulder.

"Meredith!" growled slightly inebriated Mark noticing her halting behind Derek and the girl that was heavily hitting on him.

"Mer," Derek turned around to face her with a big grin plastered on his lips. "You've finished early!"

"Want to grab a beer, Grey?" Mark asked her, or rather his neighbor's ample breasts.

"No," Meredith smiled viciously. "I already have one," she raised a hand with the stolen glass in the air, "and I came to share it with my fiancé," she gritted out, her eyes throwing daggers at the slut next to Derek. With no intention of further maintaining the conversation, she poured every single drop of the golden liquid onto Derek's lap. He jumped to his feet with a gasp but it was too late. The beer soaked his pants instantaneously.

"Enjoy your drink, honey," she spat and marched back through the crowd consisting mainly of the staff from Seattle Grace Hospital where they were all doing their residency. Everyone, from the nurses to attendings, was now roaring with hysterical laughter. However, she felt no reason to be amused and as she got out onto the fresh air, a lone tear escaped down her cheek. She brushed it off roughly as her heart panged. She just wanted her geek back.

Flashback

The fourteen-year-old Derek Shepherd dejectedly shoved his food around the plate. His first day at school was going exactly the way he imagined. He was dubbed a nerd even before he crossed the threshold of the educational institution proudly calling itself the best high school in Seattle. Everyone was either giving him contemptuous smirks or wasn't paying any attention at all. Yes, the second reason was probably why a senior from the team barreled into him leaving a big purple bruise on Derek's skinny arm and spilling all his books around him. He hastily tried to gather his books back trying to protect them as the throng of teenagers treaded carelessly over his belongings.

No one wanted to sit next to him in classes as though he was a leper. Idiots, he thought burying his head in his notes. Acne wasn't contagious. And now he was sitting all alone at a godforsaken table in the cafeteria. Soon enough, he'd be probably joined by other dorks and social pariahs. His friend Mark Sloan certainly wouldn't show up around him. It was his first day at high school as well and he needed to nourish his reputation. A guy like Mark, handsome and already starting to work up some muscle couldn't be seen with a dork like Derek Shepherd, at least for now.

However, he was not destined to suffer through his lunch in solitude. He jumped, startled, raising his head from his plate as a tray was thrown with a thud at his table, right in front of him. He watched with wide eyes as a thin girl wearing black clothes and very short pink hair threw herself angrily on the chair facing him. He stared at her, pausing on his lunch. He saw that girl before, he had classes with her. What was her name? Meredith… Grey? He would joke that Black would suit her better but he was slightly afraid of breathing a little too loud in her presence. She certainly looked like she could pull a chainsaw from her bag and cut his head off. At least, that was what indicated the constant murderous look on her features.

As he studied her form he couldn't help thinking that she was at the bottom of the high school social ladder as well, though definitely by her own choice. She could well be one of the girls chatting happily at the section of the cafeteria reserved to the popular crowd. She was slender, though her boobs were presenting themselves quite nicely. Her skin was milky white and looked like it would be very soft to touch. And her eerie green eyes additionally underlined by the thick black eyeliner were exquisitely big and… looking at him!

He felt hot under the collar and quickly dropped his eyes to his food. But the curiosity got the better of him. He furtively glanced back at her to crash against her cold regard, and her eyebrows arched down in a scowl.

"Something you don't like?" she gritted out with unmasked hostility.

"No!" he shook his head frantically.

"Then mind your business," she hissed. "Keep your eyeballs on your healthy shit or they'll end up on my fork."

He winced and resumed eating his salad not daring to look up at her all throughout the rest of the lunch.

Meredith elbowed her way through the crowded corridor. She hated high school. She hated the institution, she hated the people. They were completely brainless, self-centered and phoney, with the beauty queens and jocks being the cream of the cream and the entire rest dragging behind them, desperate for some popularity.

Yet, Meredith acknowledged the sad necessity of high school education. Her way of being and her choice of wardrobe could be frowned upon by narrow-minded personalities but her work was flawless. It had to be if she ever intended to break financially independent from her mother and prove her wrong, show her she could be even better, smarter, more talented that the great Ellis Grey. School was the unavoidable phase on the way to freedom.

Still, that little tiny detail didn't stop the all-consuming rage towards school… and the pair that were currently using her locker as a making-out surface. Meredith snorted disdainfully, it couldn't be more cliché. The guy was some hunk from the football team as his blouse would indicate while the girl, either a junior or a senior, a cheerleader.

Meredith cleared her throat loudly and stood beside with her arms folded over her chest. The only reaction she got was the brunette opening one eye to check who was interrupting her engaging activity. Seeing it was just a younger girl, dressed like a freak on top of that, she closed it back and intensified the lip lock with her boyfriend. They looked like they were wrestling.

Meredith's jaw hardened. Her fist pounded on the locker next to hers making the boy and the girl jump.

"Look, I don't give a damn what you're doing," she hissed at them. "You can suck face till you suffocate or even go at it in the middle of the corridor just. not. on. my. locker. Got it?"

The older girl let out a snort. "Do you think I care what a lousy freshman like you has to say?"

"Well, you will be when I pull out this crappy hair of yours from you empty head," bit back Meredith.

"Bring it on!" spit out the brunette rounding on her.

"Give it a rest, Nance," drawled her boyfriend. "Don't make a scene, everyone's lookin'."

"Yeah, Nancy Pants," jeered Meredith. "You'll tarnish my reputation if you continue to speak to me any longer."

"You little-"

Meredith never learnt who she was according to Nancy as her boyfriend dragged her away. With a self-satisfied sigh she retrieved her books from the locker and hurried to her biology class. Thanks to the incident with the cheerleader she arrived just before the teacher and the only available seat was at the end of a long counter. Not that she minded, she never had to sit up front in order to be at the top of the class.

"Today, any field of science is highly multidisciplinary," announced their teacher shortly into the lesson . "A real scientist knows that in order to achieve something, they need to cooperate. We'll get a little taste of that this year. Turn around and face your neighbor, you are a team as from now on. You study together, you work together, you make projects together."

With a stifled groan Meredith turned her head left and scowled at the person sitting beside her. She was a lone wolf, she worked best on her own, independent, relying only on herself. However, she wasn't as screwed as she expected, she remarked with relief. She landed with that awkward guy who was staring at her in the cafeteria, the classic high school loser. He was thin and lanky, as though he was growing so much his body couldn't catch up with him. His hair was wild and he had a few pink spots on his face. All of these things, she didn't care. The neatness with which he organized his materials indicated he was a good student. Thank God she sat in the loser zone, she didn't end up with some stupid Barbie or a hormonal kid anxious to get some action for the first time. And that guy would be so easy to control too, she giggled inwardly. Yeah, she could clearly read utter fear in his wide open eyes.

She squinted at him for additional effect.

"Derek Shepherd," he stammered. "We… uhm, we've had classes-"

"Meredith Grey," she interrupted him pitilessly. "Don't try to be nice, I already hate you. And what did I say about staring?" she snapped.

Derek slowly closed his mouth, silently praying he was going to make it through the survival camp called high school. He was so screwed.

End of flashback

It was well after midnight when Meredith heard the door to her and Derek's apartment open. She didn't sleep a wink since she went to bed hours earlier. It was just like any other day. She finished her shift, she drove home, took a bath and went to sleep… alone. Their schedules often didn't cover and in the evening Derek liked to go to the bar across the street with their friends from the hospital. Not that she didn't like hanging out with them. She did, she just didn't need to do it every day as though in order to feel like a popular kid in high school.

And today… today she poured a pint of beer on his lap in a bar full of their colleagues and she had no idea what Derek's reaction could be. If things were how they used to be, they would spar for a bit, maybe argue, but then they would laugh at the incident and have a hot passionate make-up sex. But the things changed recently and Derek was an arrogant cocky man she recognized less and less.

A/N If you enjoyed it at least a bit, hated it, want to make a suggestion or comment in any way, please leave me a word! I need your feedback.

Em

PS A new update for BBAW will be up before the end of the week.