AUTHOR'S NOTE: READ AND REVIEW, PEOPLE! :) HOW HARD IS IT TO REVIEW? :)) JUST PUT A SMILEY, IT WOULD DO. :)
DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT.
CHAPTER ONE
BY: IRONCOW
Jacob: Hi Bella! I'm ready for my pick up lines! Get ready, 'coz you might wet yourself with its awesomeness!
Bella: Are you doing it already?
Jacob: Not yet, actually.
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Jacob: Is it warm in here, or are you in heat?
Bella: Jacob, you're all covered up. Of course you'll feel warm.
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Jacob: I'll sniff your butt if you sniff mine.
Bella: Disgusting! Jacob! You have to try better if you want to date me!
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Jacob: Whoa! Look at that puppy!
Bella: Where?
Jacob: Me!
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Jacob: I must be a Dog Flea, because I'm stuck on you.
Bella: Gross. So you're like Edward? You suck blood and stick?
Jacob: No!
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Jacob: Hey, bitch!
Bella: Asshole!
Jacob: When I say "bitch", I mean it as a compliment!
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Jacob: Hey baby, meeting you has given me a new leash on life.
Bella: I haven't even given you your collar yet. How will I leash you without any collar?
Jacob: Really? You're going to give me a collar?
Bello: No.
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Jacob: Baby, you are what I call a hot dog!
Bella: So, you think I'm delicious?
Jacob: Well… I am a little hungry…
Bella: Edward!
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Jacob: Come on, Bella, don't make me beg!
Bella: That's it?
Jacob: You don't like it? It's kind of ironic. You know, with me, begging, like a dog.
Bella: It's not good, Jacob.
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Jacob: Hey there, beautiful… looking for an Alpha dog?
Bella: Isn't Sam the Alpha dog of your pack?
Jacob: Yeah. But I think I can be a better Alpha dog with you.
Sam: Jacob? What did you just say?
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Jacob: Hey Gorgeous, can I buy you a liver treat?
Bella: That's gross. I'd rather eat a dog!
Jacob: What? Animals have animal rights! How dare you!
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Jacob: I can go from furry to naked in 1.3 seconds.
Bella: You time it?
Jacob: Well, yeah. Is that bad?
Bella: No. Just, weird.
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Jacob: Will you be the mother of my puppies?
Bella: You have puppies? Where?
Jacob: No, but if you want to make some…
Bella: That's not right.
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Jacob: Want to play a game? You can be the Little Red Riding Hood and I'll be the big Bad Wolf!
Bella: Okay, I will need a red clothing, a basket full of food, a wig…
Jacob: Nevermind!
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Jacob: So how do you feel about wolves?
Bella: They are furry, wet and stinky.
Jacob: I don't smell!
Bella: Oh! You mean you? I think you're just plain amazing!
Jacob: Really?
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Jacob: I give a whole new meaning to… I forgot!
Bella: Tell me if you remember it. –WALKS AWAY-
Jacob: I remember now! Animal Attraction! Bella!
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Jacob: You look imprintable. I mean impeccable in that outfit.
Bella: Jacob, I'm wearing shorts and a shirt. Impeccable enough for you?
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Jacob: Hey baby, need a mechanic for that finely tuned body of yours?
Bella: I'm pregnant.
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Jacob: You know what they say, right? Once you go "Black" you never go back.
Bella: Are you saying I'm black?
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Jacob: You look cold. Want to use me as a blanket? I produce good heat.
Bella: You used that already. In Book 3: Eclipse. During camping.
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Jacob: Did you win "best in show"? Because you sure are a winner to me.
Bella: Okay. I've got to admit, that was cute.
Jacob: At last!
Bella: Oh well… its Edward's turn.
READ AND REVIEW! THANK YOU!
-IRONCOW