(Author's Note): Hello readers! :) Thanks for checking out my story! I've just got a few things to address before I shut up and let you guys read Chapter 1. First, this story is an Alice/Bella story and will contain femmeslash, just in case anyone missed that in the summary. If you don't like, don't read. Second, what I'm aiming for in this story is working the Alice/Bella pairing into Eclipse. Each chapter will start out with a quote from the book. I'll provide the page number at the beginning of each chapter so you can go peek in the book if you'd like. You don't have to look it up to understand the chapter, but it might add a little something if you know how the chapter corresponds to the book. :) This chapter's quote is at the very top of page 185 in Eclipse. That's about it! Hope you guys enjoy Chapter 1 and thanks for stopping by!

Disclaimer: I don't own anything. I'm just borrowing Stephenie Meyer's characters and a quote from her book.

I went to bed early that night, curling up on his sofa again.

I had a nightmare again tonight. But instead of crawling down the dark alleyway, I was wandering in the cold, dank forest, walking parallel to a small, clear stream. Why was I here? Did Edward bring me here? Were any of the Cullens around? I looked around for familiar figures and faces. As I walked, I accidentally stepped on a large, moss-covered stick. It broke with a startling snap. I looked down at the noise and noticed I was barefoot. Strange. I hadn't even felt the stick underfoot. The forest floor hardly felt different than the carpeted floor of my bedroom. I stepped back and examined the sharp, splintered wood. It should've pierced my skin. But I hadn't felt a thing. I didn't smell any blood, either. I sat down and propped myself against a massive tree trunk, looking at my foot for any signs of damage. Nothing. My skin was completely unscathed.

As I stared at the unbroken skin in disbelief, I noticed that I looked oddly pale. Paler than usual. Almost gray. Was the misty chilliness of the forest what gave it such an odd cast?

Wait.

I leaned over to the fractured stick and picked up the half with the sharper end. I grasped it tightly, held my breath, and jabbed it forcefully into the soft skin at the bend of my elbow. Looking back, it wasn't the smartest plan of action for someone who sickens at the scent of blood. But it gave me my answer. I heard something crack. My moss-covered weapon had splintered even further on contact with my arm. My eyes widened.

I leapt up far too gracefully and sprinted to the little stream. I stared at my reflection in the clear water. I looked...beautiful. Disconcertingly so. I hardly looked like myself. My hair fell in sleek, silky waves about my face, tamer than I'd ever seen it. My skin was flawless, but frighteningly pale. It gleamed a whitish-gray in the gloom of the forest.

And my eyes. My eyes glinted back at me through the water, a dark, leering red.

I was a vampire.

My epiphany was interrupted as I heard rustling movement behind me. I spun around and stared into the mist. The gray outline of a person materialized out of the pearly fog. As the figure walked forward, it became more focused, until I could make out a face.

It was...Mike? What the hell was Mike doing out here? And Jessica? She appeared out of the mist beside him. They didn't notice me, so I called out to them.

"Jess! Mike! What're you..." my words caught in my throat. As soon as I'd spoken, Mike and Jess whipped their heads around to stare at me. No, they weren't staring. They were glaring. Glaring absolute daggers at me. I took a step back as they turned and walked away, melting back into the fog.

As soon as they disappeared, I heard more movement behind me. I jerked around a full one hundred and eighty degrees. Normally the movement would've spun me right off balance and onto the ground. But not now.

This time, Angela and Ben were waiting for me. And they were glaring at me just as lividly as Jess and Mike had. What on earth had I done to make everyone so angry?

"Ben! Angela! What's going on? What did I do? I'm....I'm sorry! Whatever I did, I'm sorry! I'm really, really sorry..."

But Ben and Angela didn't reply. They turned and were soon lost in the mist just like Mike and Jessica. Why wouldn't anyone talk to me? What had I done that was so heinous that my friends turned and walked away whenever I spoke?

I listened for more movement, expecting someone else to come and glower at me. I didn't hear anything. But when I glanced to my left, I saw the massive outline of another person. His back was to me, but I recognized him immediately, even through the darkness and mist. It was Jacob. I moved forward towards him, relieved.

"Jake! Thank God," I sighed before the babbling began. "A bunch of my friends from school were here! And I don't know what their problem is, but everyone's mad at me and I have no idea what I did! And nobody will talk to me, they just keep walking away from me, so I can't even figure out how to fix it!"

I paused to take a breath, as close to tears as a vampire could be. "I have no clue where I am or how to get home! You have to get me out of this place, Jake! It's really starting to give me the creeps!"

Jacob didn't answer. I heard an odd rumbling, almost inaudible.

"Jake? Hello? It's Bella! Are you listening? You have to take me home! I don't think I can find my way there! If I could catch a scent, I might be able to figure it out, but I've got nothing! I can't smell Jess, or Angela, or Mike or anyone! I can't even smell you..." I trailed off. Odd. Weren't vampires supposed to think werewolves smelled bad? If they smelled so awful, I should've caught Jacob's scent right away.

My uneasy thought process was interrupted. The strange rumbling had gotten louder. Jacob finally turned to face me and I froze. His lip was curled over his teeth and he was shaking violently. I realized what the rumbling was. Jake was growling. At me.

"Jake, what're you doing? It's me! It's Bella!"

Jacob's growling ripped into a full-blown snarl and his shape blurred. As the wolf appeared in front of me, I suddenly remembered Jacob's words from earlier that day. "You won't be Bella anymore. My friend won't exist."

I turned to run, but the colossal red-brown wolf was already a step ahead of me. The animal lunged at me in a whirlwind of fur and teeth and its massive jaws closed around my throat.

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I jerked violently awake, shaking and sweating, gasping for breath. I clutched the edge of Edward's black leather couch to try and steady myself. The force of my sudden awakening had almost launched me off the couch onto the plush carpet. I took slow, deep breaths to try and calm my racing heart.

"Are you alright?"

This time I did fall off the couch, landing with a dull thud on the floor. The carpet was not nearly as comfortable as it looked.

I heard a high pitched giggle reminiscent of the tinkling of wind-chimes floating from the couch.

"Oops. Sorry, Bella."

"What the hell, Alice?" I sputtered. I was going to have a heart attack before the end of the night. I was sure of it.

"Sorry. I didn't mean to scare you," she tittered, peeking over at me from the edge of the couch. "I saw that there was no way to alert you of my presence and not startle you a bit. But falling off the couch got left out of the vision."

She looked thoroughly amused. I, however, was thoroughly annoyed. Instead of offering my forgiveness, I concentrated on disentangling myself from the dull, gold coverlet. I was failing miserably. Alice sighed pleasantly.

"May I help you with that?"

"Sure. Whatever," I muttered. I would let her help since I wasn't making any progress on my own. But I certainly wasn't going to be nice to someone who had kidnapped me for two days and almost given me a heart attack after a horrific nightmare.

Alice leaned over, scooped me up off the floor, and placed me gently beside her on the couch. I noticed she had straightened out the coverlet somewhere in the process. Once I got settled, I turned to Alice who was looking at me expectantly, raised up on the arm of the couch on her right elbow, head propped in her hand.

"Umm, not to be rude or anything," I said with every intention of being as rude as possible, "but why are you in here?"

Alice smiled as if I had actually meant the statement that preceded my question.

"I don't think you slept very well last night. I heard you tossing and turning. I could tell from your breathing that you woke up quite a few times. I think it's because you're so used to having Edward with you. So I wondered if you would sleep any better if I were in here. I'm not sure it worked, though," Alice sighed, face falling just a little. "You're just as restless tonight. And you sounded like you were having a nightmare. Am I right?"

I nodded curtly. "But that's nothing new. I have nightmares all the time."

Alice's eyes brimmed with concern and sympathy.

"What was this one about?"

I huffed impatiently. "I don't want to talk about it, Alice. I want to go back to sleep," I snapped harshly.

Alice blinked a few times obviously trying to conceal the hurt in her eyes. She turned to stare out the wall-sized window in Edward's room. After a moment, she turned back to me and sighed, her wintery breath ghosting across my face.

"Please don't be angry with me, Bella. Or with Edward. We're only trying to protect you."

"By holding me hostage, Alice? You can't tell me that that's not just a little bit over-the-top. Or maybe deranged is a better term..."

"Bella. You can't tell me that you don't see even a little bit of the danger in palling around with a volatile, teenage werewolf."

"Yes, because vampire slumber parties are the epitome of safety-conscious behavior."

"You said that last night."

"I know. I'm reiterating."

Alice pursed her lips. "This is getting us nowhere, Bella."

"Exactly. So maybe now you'll leave me alone and let me go back to sleep. I'm not going back to LaPush any time soon anyway," I muttered.

The annoyance in Alice's eyes softened into curiosity and worry. She looked at me for a minute before saying, "Well, I'll listen if you want to tell me what happened. But you don't have to."

I picked at the seam of the coverlet for a while. I wasn't sure whether I wanted to tell Alice about Jacob's outburst. After all, he had almost phased when I broke the news that I only had a few weeks before I was supposed to be changed into a vampire. I didn't want to validate her argument. I could see that she was insanely curious as to why I had come skidding into the garage that evening on an old, beaten up motorcycle, soaking wet, shivering, and absolutely livid. But beyond that, I could see that she really was worried about me. I decided to go ahead and tell her the story. It'd make me feel better. I was pissed at Jacob anyway.

Alice suddenly gasped beside me. "He said what?"

"Alice!" I groaned in exasperation, "Can't you at least let me tell the story before you react?"

Alice grimaced sheepishly, putting a hand over her mouth. "Sorry," she murmured from behind her hand. "Please, go ahead."

I shook my head and began. "Well, we were sitting in Jacob's garage. He asked me if I was serious about being changed. If I'd meant it when I told him that it wasn't his business if Edward bit me."

Alice nodded, absorbed already, though I was sure she'd heard the whole conversation already. Or, rather, seen it.

"He took that surprisingly well. He was expecting it, I think. Then he started talking about the treaty," I scowled. "Saying that if any of you changed me, that that violates the treaty."

"He has a point. It is a violation," Alice nodded, encouraging me to keep talking.

"I know. Which was why I told him that we'd have to leave before that happened. Then he told me that there was...what did he say? 'No geographic limit to the treaty.' Basically that, once they knew I was changed, and once they found us again, the war would be started."

"As if they could find us if we didn't want to be found. Werewolves understand very little about stealth," Alice sniffed. "And what is this about 'no geographic limit?'"

"I know. It doesn't makes sense to me either," I shook my head. "Anyway, I asked him how he was going to deal with it once I was changed. If he was going to forgive me and all. He said that, if I were changed, that I....wouldn't exist, in his eyes. That there wouldn't be anyone to forgive." I looked back down at the coverlet for a minute. I was trying to put on a brave face. But there was really no denying it. Jake had really hurt me when he said those things. I'd even had a nightmare about it.

I looked up at Alice to see her reaction. She was quiet, having decided not to openly insult my best friend. Or maybe now it was former best friend. But her eyes had a steely spark in them, her mouth was pressed into a tight, thin line, and her nostrils were slightly flared, all signs of her outrage. She unclenched her delicate jaw for just a moment. "Continue. I know there's more."

I nodded. "So I asked him if I needed to say goodbye to him right there. He was really surprised. He thought he had a few more years. And when I told him it was more like weeks....well, he didn't like that. He...almost phased." I paused to gauge Alice's reaction.

Alice was perfectly still, ire still etched onto her face. She took a deep breath through her nose and opened her mouth to speak, "Bella, I don't want to say I told you s-"

"Alice, don't you dare finish that sentence," I interrupted. "I know, okay? Can I finish?"

Alice pressed her lips back into the thin, angry line and nodded.

"He almost phased, but he calmed back down. I told him that Edward was already technically a year younger than me and asked him what else I was supposed to do. He told me he'd rather me be dead. That's when I left. I just wish I had had my truck there. It was freezing riding back in that rain."

"You're lucky you didn't catch something riding in that weather. If you had just stayed at school..."

"Alice! Shut up about it! What happened happened! There's nothing you can do about it now, so just leave it, okay?"

Alice exhaled slowly through her nose. "I'm sorry Bella. It's just...difficult to swallow. That someone who is supposed to be your friend could say something like that to you, just..." Alice shook her head. "Jacob is very, very lucky that I have the rest of my family to worry about. I won't break the treaty because they'd be involved. If it was just me, I'd be on my way to LaPush right now to give Jacob a little piece of my mind..."

I just let Alice's little tirade run its course. Normally hearing her threaten Jacob would've angered me. But after what Jacob had said to me today, it made me feel better to have someone on my side. Even if I was annoyed that she'd kidnapped me per Edward's request.

Alice slowed down, finishing her rant with a few muttered, well-placed expletives and a quiet, but alarming threat involving the detachment of Jacob's...well, the detachment of a few... appendages.

I blushed, barely containing the giggle that threatened to bubble out of me. Hearing things like that pouring out of Alice's dainty little mouth was a strange experience indeed. "You finished?" I asked.

"Yes. I feel much better now," she grinned.

I smiled a little, but it faltered. I was still upset. Alice noticed. She scooted down the couch so her head rested on my shoulder. The soft, silken ends of her spiky hair tickled my neck. The arm that she had had propped on the arm of the couch snaked around my waist, squeezing me lightly into a one-armed hug.

"I'm sorry he hurt your feelings."

I nodded. "It's fine. It was probably stupid of me to tell him. I should've just left the first time."

Alice's eyes flicked up towards my face as she gave me a questioning look. "The first time?"

"I thought about leaving before the...incident."

Alice turned over to give me her undivided attention, slipping one arm out from under me, throwing her other arm over my waist and resting her delicate, pointed chin a little below my collar bone. She looked up at me. "You thought about leaving before? Why? What did he do?" Alice's voice turned threatening again. I could feel the movement of her jaw against me as she spoke.

"Nothing too bad. We were talking about imprinting."

Alice nodded, chin bobbing on my chest.

"I asked him if he thought he'd ever imprint. He said no. I told him I thought he'd said it wasn't something you could control, and he said it wasn't. He said something about that you had to see her. I didn't really understand that part. But I did say that just because he hasn't seen her yet, doesn't mean she's not out there. But then...he said he never saw anyone else. That he only sees...me." I sighed. "I don't know what to do with him when he gets like that. He's my friend. I don't want to hurt him. But that's just it. He's my friend. Only my friend. I wish he'd just keep it to himself so I didn't have to hurt him."

I looked down at Alice, who hadn't spoken in a few minutes. She had moved her head so her ear was resting right over my heart. Her expression was odd. She looked...sad. No. Sad wasn't quite powerful enough to describe it. There was an overwhelming sense of melancholy that permeated her entire being. As soon as she noticed that I was looking at her, she quickly smoothed her face into a carefully blank expression. She shrugged against me. "I wouldn't be too hard on Jacob. It's better than Mike Newton, right?"

I frowned lightly at Alice's strange behavior. But I decided to let it go right this second. "Definitely better than Mike. Or Eric. Or Tyler..." I sighed.

"Most of the male population of Forks High School..."

"Alice! It's not that bad."

"It is that bad, Bella. You have absolutely no idea how many people are totally smitten with you. Everyone seems to be a little bit in love with you, Bella."

"Why? I don't know why they like me! I'm really not that interesting! And it's sweet and all, but I just want to be left alone! Is that too much to ask?"

"Bella. You absolutely are 'interesting,' as you put it. You're intelligent, you're kind, a little quirky, funny. And beautiful. You're...captivating. How could they not like you?"

"I'm not beautiful, Alice. Or 'captivating.' You're beautiful. Rosalie is beautiful. Esme is beautiful. I'm not. Don't lie to me."

"You are beautiful, Bella. Truly. And, again, don't be too hard on them."

"On who?"

"Everyone. Jacob, Mike, Tyler, Eric. They can't help it. You make it impossible not to love you, Bella."

I huffed. "Are we done talking about this now?"

I felt Alice nod against me. I looked back down at her. Alice's expression had reverted back to careful expressionlessness. But I wasn't fooled. I had known the Cullens long enough to know what that meant. If any of the Cullens, especially Edward or Alice, didn't want me to know something, they did this. Adopted a smooth, blank expression that was nearly impossible to interpret. But I had also known Edward and Alice long enough to be able to look for signs of emotion in the right places. The Cullens couldn't completely remove the emotion from their faces. You could get a reading on them if you knew where to look.

With Edward, it was all in the lips and eyebrows. Relaxed mouth meant he was thinking; both corners upturned meant happiness; one corner upturned meant amusement; lips stretched tight meant annoyance. One eyebrow higher than the other meant questioning; both eyebrows arched meant worry; eyebrows pulled up and together meant confusion; eyebrows turned down and together meant anger; flat eyebrows and pinched lips meant sadness.

With Alice, it was all in the eyes. The specific kind of light that reflected in Alice's eyes told everything. Steely spark meant anger; sharp flash meant she was annoyed because things weren't going her way; shimmering meant happiness; sparkling meant mischievousness and plotting; a clear silvery sheen meant love.

And mistiness meant sorrow.

Alice's expression was perfectly blank. But her eyes had that mistiness in them.

"Alice. What's wrong?"

Alice looked at me with carefully constructed innocence. "Nothing's wrong, Bella. What gave you that idea?"

"Alice. I'm not an idiot. Something is wrong. You look sad. Why?"

"I do not look sad, Bella." Alice looked at the wall-sized window, using it in place of a mirror as if to prove herself. "I'm not sad. I'm perfectly fine."

"You are sad. I can tell."

"And how is that?"

"Your eyes. They're misty."

Alice froze, eyes boring into mine. "What?" she breathed.

"Your eyes look all misty. Not like you're crying just...misty. Foggy, almost. They always look like that when you're sad. What's wrong?"

The facade dropped immediately. Alice just sat there and blinked at me a few times. Then her eyes drifted down to examine her hands.

"That's...observant of you, Bella."

"I have my moments. So there is something wrong."

Alice sighed. "Yes."

"Are you going to tell me what it is?"

Alice paused. Sighed again, heavier this time. "No."

"Why?"

"It's just one of those things that's better left alone."

I nodded. I really wanted to know what it was that was making Alice so miserable. But I wasn't going to push her. If she didn't want to tell me, she didn't have to. I just had one more question before I would let her suffer in silence.

"Can I ask one more question?"

Alice paused, then nodded infinitesimally.

"Does it have anything to do with me?"

Alice didn't move. All she did was shut her eyes tightly as if she were trying to make whatever the problem was disappear. After a minute or so, she slowly opened her eyes again, as if accepting an inevitability.

"Yes."

Well. That changed things. I had intended to leave the issue alone. Had intended to let Alice be. But if I was involved? I wanted to know what was going on. Especially with the knowledge that Victoria was back in action. I was getting really tired of having things kept from me.

"Then I want to know."

"Bella. It's not as urgent as you think. Trust me. You'll be better off not knowing."

"But-"

"Please leave it alone, Bella."

"But it involves me, Alice! I think I have a right to know if I'm already involved!"

"Bella, it's really not that bad."

"If it's not that bad, why do you look so miserable? If it's not that bad, why won't you tell me what's going on?"

"Bella!" Alice sounded miffed and a little desperate.

"Don't 'Bella' me, Alice! I'm tired of people keeping things from me! Everyone's always trying to 'protect' me! I'm not a child, Alice! I handled finding out Victoria was back! Whatever this is, I can handle it, too."

Alice sat up and slid to the far end of the couch. She curled up against the arm, and pulled her knees up to her chin.

"You're not going to let this go," she whispered. It wasn't a question. She pressed her forehead against her knees for a moment. As her face was buried in her knees, the clouds outside parted for a moment, letting the moonlight filter through the window. When Alice raised her head back up, the moon was at her back. The moonlight cast a glowing, silver outline around her frame and drifted through her hair, creating a feathered halo around her face.

"I didn't want this," she whispered, most likely to herself. Then she turned to me. "I'm not quite sure where to start, Bella."

I shrugged. "Well, you started looking funny when I was talking about Jacob and the whole imprinting thing. Does it have to do with the wolves?"

"No. It has more to do with what you told me about your conversation with Jacob today. What I said after that."

"What?" I stopped to think. This wasn't making any sense. "You mean the part about...I mean, the threats and everything?"

Alice rolled her eyes before her face sank back into the wistful grief it had worn before.

"No, Bella. The other conversation. The imprinting one."

"Oh." I thought for a minute. Hold on. She kept telling me 'not to be too hard' on Jacob. This still wasn't making a bit of sense. "You mean when you told me not to be too hard on Jake?"

Alice nodded and smirked weakly. "You didn't think it was just a little strange that I was actually siding with Jacob?"

"Well, a little, yeah. But I didn't think too much about it. But now that you mention it again, that is pretty weird," I laughed. "I still don't really get it. Why did you say that about Jacob? I thought you hated him. It certainly seemed like that from your...threats earlier tonight."

"I do hate Jacob."

"Alice, you're not making sense. I can't figure out where you're going with this. You say it doesn't involve the wolves, but you keep mentioning Jacob. Are you going to tell me what's going on, or not?"

Alice nodded, looking down at her feet. I waited for a moment. When she didn't speak, I asked, "So, why did you side with Jacob?"

Alice inhaled softly through her nose, held the breath for a minute, and then exhaled slowly. She was still looking at her feet; her long black eyelashes fanned against her face casting wispy shadows across her cheekbones. "I suppose it's because I empathize with Jacob."

What?

"Did you mean sympathize?"

Alice closed her eyes. "No. I meant empathize."

My mind went literally blank for a few moments before the message began to sink in. Empathize? To empathize meant to identify with someone. To empathize meant that you shared the feelings of the person you were relating to. Alice empathized with Jacob? What did that mea-

Oh. Oh. The thought had been dancing along the periphery of my mind a second ago, but I didn't let it into the forefront of my brain until now. I thought back to what Alice had said earlier tonight:

"Don't be too hard on them."

"On who?"

"Everyone. Jacob, Mike, Tyler, Eric. They can't help it. You make it impossible not to love you, Bella."

I just sat there for a minute, eyes wide.

"So....the way Jacob feels about me. You...you feel the same way?"

Alice nodded, heavy shame written all over her delicate features. She continued looking at her shoes, voice tight and strained with emotion. "I'm sorry, Bella. I tried. I really did. I tried so hard to ignore it. The harder I tried, the worse it got. It doesn't seem to matter what I do. It's always there. I wasn't going to tell you. I didn't want you to know. I didn't want you to feel uncomfortable. I didn't want you to be angry with me. I didn't want anything to change. You were happy with the way things were with us. I suppose that's ruined now." Alice laughed bitterly.

I should've told Alice right there that I wasn't upset with her. More surprised, really. But sometimes the connection between my brain and my mouth malfunctions. Instead of easing Alice's fears, I just kept asking questions.

"So, you're...in love with me?"

Alice closed her eyes. Her voice cracked as she spoke. "Deeply."

"Does anyone else know about this?"

Alice opened her eyes again, but still wouldn't look at me. "A few. Jasper, obviously..."

I had completely forgotten about Jasper. "How does Jasper feel about this? How did he find out? How are you in love with me? You're supposed to be in love with Jasper..."

"Slow down, Bella," Alice chuckled feebly. "I'll answer all of your questions, I promise. First, how Jasper found out. You really should know that answer. How could he not find out? He feels what others feel, Bella. He feels what I feel particularly strongly. He feels the same love I feel every time I see you. Feels the shame that follows it. Feels the frustration as I try to ignore it, try to suppress it. Feels the self-hatred when I fail. Feels the indecision when you're both in the room with me. Feels the hopelessness and longing I feel when I look at you. And the despair I feel because I know I'm hurting him. He understands exactly what this does to me. What you do to me. He endures all of it with me.

"Second, how Jasper feels about this. Of course, he's hurt. How could he not be? He tries not to let it show. He's been absolutely supportive. He hasn't gotten angry with me once. He just keeps me going, tries to help me through it, tries to keep me from feeling too guilty or too hopeless about things. He's really more than I deserve. It helps that he truly understands where I'm coming from. And he refuses to hold this against me. But it hurts him nonetheless. I know it does. And I can't do a thing about it. I've tried. It just...doesn't work.

"Third, how can I be in love with you if I'm supposed to be in love with Jasper? You can be in love with more than one person at a time, Bella. It's much more common than people think. And, unfortunately, it's happened to me. I love Jasper immensely. He knows that, thank God. I just happen love you tremendously as well. Does that cover it so far?"

"Yes." Alice still hadn't looked up from her shoes. "Who else knows about this?"

"Well, now Carlisle and Esme. Just because they're in the only ones in the house right now besides us. They've heard the entire conversation. Not that it matters that they've heard it. Carlisle and Esme would love all of us no matter what."

"Yeah. They would." It didn't bother me at all that Carlisle and Esme had heard this. I wouldn't want Emmett or Rosalie to know. Just because Alice would never live it down. But it was actually very comforting to know that Carlisle and Esme were here and that they knew. And that it didn't matter. All they wanted was for their children to be happy, whatever that meant. There was just one more thing I wanted to know.

"Edward. What about Edward?"

Alice grimaced. "He doesn't know yet. Jasper and I have been able to block those thoughts thus far. It was insanely difficult, but we've managed...hold on." Alice's eyes were suddenly unfocused. She was searching the future. Trying to see how long it would take for Edward to figure it out. Alice's eyes came back into focus. Her grimace deepened. "He'll find out tomorrow. In the morning. While I'm driving you back to your house. Someone's thoughts will slip. I can't tell who it is at this point. But someone will. I guess it was just a matter of time." Alice looked uneasy. We both knew Edward well enough to know that that tidbit of information wasn't going to go over well. Edward would be livid. More than that, he'd feel horribly betrayed. Alice was his favorite sibling. Edward and Alice were partners in crime. And to find out that his beloved little sister was in love with me? Not good. I cringed at the thought. I was so busy worrying about Edward's wrath being unleashed on poor little Alice that I didn't notice that Alice had gotten up off the couch. She was halfway to the door before I noticed she had left.

"Wait! Where are you going?"

Alice turned towards me, eyes still downcast and foggy, anguish etched on her face. "I'm giving you some time to think. You'll deal with it better if I leave you alone to think on it. By the way, Edward will be home in precisely two hours, thirty three minutes, and eight seconds. I thought you'd want to know."

Before I could get another word in edgewise, Alice had dissolved into the shadows.

I paused to think a little about what Alice had just told me. It was so...bizarre. I felt like I was tumbling down the rabbit hole, no pun intended. I was barely able to grasp that one Cullen was in love with me. But two? That seemed impossible. What was so special about me that not one, but two incredibly beautiful, intelligent, kind vampires could love me? I didn't care what Alice or Edward said. I wasn't anything special. I decided not to dwell on it. I'd never understand what they saw in me.

The question was: How did I feel about what Alice had told me? I wasn't sure. It was strange, yes, but not uncomfortable. I searched within myself for signs of anger and uneasiness. Nothing. It should've freaked me out a little. Like it did when Jacob told me he loved me. It should've annoyed me, made me angry like it did when Jake wouldn't leave me alone. But it didn't. I think it had to do with the grief and shame I had seen on Alice's tiny face. Jacob had no shame. He didn't worry quite as much about my feelings and boundaries. Alice had looked so guilty. Like she felt that she had wronged me personally. That's why I wasn't upset with Alice. I knew that Alice wouldn't push me like Jacob did. Alice would do anything to avoid upsetting me. She'd do anything to prevent me from feeling uncomfortable, or uneasy, or angry, or scared. Even if that meant denying her own feelings. Alice would accept my boundaries. She loved me enough to let me be. To let me go.

I yawned, suddenly aware of how tired I was. Alice was right. I hadn't slept well last night and what little sleep I had gotten tonight had been fitful. I had two and a half hours before Edward came home. I needed to try and get a little sleep before that if I could. I turned over and closed my eyes, pulling the coverlet over my shoulder. I lay there, breathing quietly for awhile before I realized I wasn't comfortable in that position. I turned over to lie on my stomach. I waited in that position for maybe eight minutes before deciding that I still wasn't comfortable. I flipped over to lie on my back. I was lying there, eyes closed when I heard something. I listened harder. It was...music. Singing? Yes. Singing. I frowned. Where was it coming from? Had I fallen asleep without noticing? Was I dreaming? I could barely hear it, but what I heard was beautiful. High. Ethereal. Exquisite. No, I wasn't dreaming. I opened my eyes. The singing continued for another minute or so before it decrescendoed into silence. When it stopped, I closed my eyes and made another attempt at sleep.

After twenty minutes of lying there, I was still completely conscious. The couch was far too soft and warm to be comfortable and it was far too quiet for me to sleep. I guess I wouldn't get my two hours before Edward got here. I sighed, getting ready to lie here and wait for a good two hours. Or...

An idea struck me.

"Alice?" I whispered. I knew she could hear me, even at this low a volume.

I waited for a minute. Nothing.

"Alice? Will you come sit with me? Please?" I whispered again.

Another minute. Still nothing.

"Alice? I can't sleep."

I waited a minute more. Fine. I guess she was going to ignore me. I closed my eyes again. A moment later, I felt the couch sink beside me. I turned over and looked up. And smiled. Alice was stretched out beside me, perched on the edge of the black leather couch, smiling softly and tentatively. I also saw that she was giving me a wide berth. Usually Alice was very cuddly. After what she'd told me tonight, it was obvious she was trying to respect my personal space.

I reached out with both arms and put them around her waist, pulling her to me and squeezing her like a teddy bear. She giggled. Finally. Some signs of happiness. I rested my head on her shoulder and sighed.

"Thank you. You know I can't sleep without a vampire anymore."

Alice chuckled. "What am I going to do with you, Bella?"

I shrugged and smiled. We rested in companionable silence for a moment before I spoke. "Alice?"

"Yes?"

"You know I'm not upset with you, right?"

"I was afraid for a while that you were. But now I'm pretty sure you're not," she laughed, indicating our current position.

"I'm sorry I can't love you quite the same way you love me. I wish I could. I do love you, Alice, even if it's not the way you want. I don't want you to be unhappy."

"Please don't apologize, Bella. I'm sorry this happened in the first place. I'm sorry I complicated things. But as long as you're not upset, as long as you're happy, I'll be fine. Don't worry about me."

I nodded contentedly. I closed my eyes and inhaled deeply, Alice's sweet scent swirling around me. Then I remembered something.

"Alice?"

"Yes?"

"Were you...singing earlier?"

"Singing? Yes. It helps me get my mind off things. Why?"

"I just wanted to know. It was beautiful."

Alice just sighed happily.

I spoke again. "What song was that?"

"Something I made up."

"You wrote it?"

Alice shook her head. "I didn't write it. I just made it up."

"On the spot?"

"Yes. Just a little improvisational thing."

"Oh. Could you... do you think you could sing it again?"

Alice looked pleasantly surprised. "You really want to hear it?"

I nodded.

"Alright."

I had heard Alice sing a few times in the car, over a CD. A few times with Edward at the piano. But never by herself. Her voice, along with her improvised song, was heartbreakingly beautiful. High and delicate, but not breathy. Alice's voice spun and shimmered through her plaintive little melody. Like glass. Alice's voice and song were like a tiny piece of beautiful, intricate, spun glass. Clear, delicate, and beautiful, but not without substance. I was hypnotized by it. It was like magic. I finally drifted to sleep on Alice's shoulder, her lilting voice spinning around me.

I had another dream when I fell asleep. Not a nightmare. A good dream. I had dreamt of Edward countless times. But never Alice. That was the first night I dreamt of Alice Cullen. It wasn't complicated. Just flashes, images. The light that shone in her amber eyes, the feathered halo the moonlight made as it drifted through her sable hair, and her ethereal, glass-like song that shimmered in the silver night.

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