This night feels like the longest night that I have ever experienced. I don't know what to do, but to stay on the floor, in his apartment. I wait. But I know that no one will come here, but someone that might want to buy this apartment.

But I won't let anyone buy it. This is my world, I belong here. But why isn't he here?

The wind blows freely in this room from the open window and the apartment looks even colder and emptier than it already is.

But I am too tired to go to it and close it. The dog is at my right, pushing its head into me, seeking the warmth that I had lost or to give me some of its warmth, I can't tell which one.

I stare at the place where the couch should be, where we have often sat together and talked, or we looked at the television, or when he had read to me a book he was reading and when I asked him several times, he read it to me, out loud.

I felt like a little child, but I felt safe in the same time. I knew that I was more attentive at him than at the story, but I don't regret it, and he didn't seem to be bothered by it…

I remember when we stood at the window and we've looked outside at the stars…

The painting that we bought together on the internet and that we hanged it together on the wall, where now, it's just a mere shadow, white empty space.

Like everything.

The seventeen dream: The shadows

Tears have formed in my eyes at the memories that have suddenly come back to me, ravishing my body, mind and heart.

'Why did I leave?'

I continued to think about how I wanted to turn back in time and stop myself from saying those cursed words, to stop myself from leaving him…

I continued to remember memories that at first, they made me sad and still do, but I found myself smiling with a tear on my right cheek while then, I realized I've closed my eyes, and I opened them, and I realized that they are just memories even if they felt so close, like they have had happened just seconds ago, nothing it's really near me, nothing from those memories, just these walls…

I continued to cry and to embrace the dog while he can't sleep because of me…

I continued to put the entire the blame on me, to replay my memories in my head, to embrace the tired dog while in my mind , I embrace Sasuke, I continued to do all this while the night passed right before my eyes.

The sun's light has entered in this room, right when I fell asleep ,and it burned my eyes and so, I woke up after I slept just some minutes, I don't think even a hour has passed since I fell asleep.

So I squat myself in the shadowed corner of the room on the hard wooden floor.

I closed my eyes.

"I love you Naruto."

I opened my eyes.

Somehow, I knew, I won't be able to sleep for a long time now, but why have I remembered exactly that?

Why from every memory that I could've remember, why that?

Why now, it feels like…

"Who are you?"

I quickly looked up from the wooden floor and saw a woman at the door.

"I am sorry, I live here, or I had lived here and…"

I don't want to talk, I don't even know how to explain, there are no words for all that happened here, now, that all that this woman sees is this empty house.

'I wish I could just show her…'

After some seconds of her, staring at me, and me, staring at her, a man and another woman have came after her, and then a small child after them.

'A family that searches for a house…' I thought quietly in my mind, somehow, I wish I would not hear …my own thoughts…

"Well, you don't live here anymore, no?"

"I don't... but I don't have where to go so…"

I can't find my words…

Before she could say another word, the dog had got in its four legs and has barked dangerously at them, and they just stared at him and for a second, I was afraid of the dog too. But then I looked twice, and I felt protected.

'This house? Or… Me?'

Everybody looks at me, they wait for me to react, but then I've realized that I don't want this family to live here, I don't want anyone else to live here, but us.

No one.

"I'm sorry, but can't you search for another house?"

I asked her while I realized that she must be some woman that presents the houses that are for sale for people that are willing to buy, and then I looked at the confused family.

"But…" The woman spoke and the child just pulls innocently the woman's long skirt, while saying mommy, while the woman just stares at the dog with wide open eyes.

"You understand that I will call the police if you do not evacuate this apartment immediately, do you?"

Somehow, I hesitated at the word 'police', knowing that I might be arrested for something like this, but the question is if they would call Sasuke if I will be, indeed, arrested.

Then, the idea hit me.

I rose up from the floor and I calmed the dog a little, while everybody, including the dog looked at me confused.

"Do you know where the previous owner lives now?"

I looked at the woman while she seemed just as lost patience for me and my dog...

"How should I know?"

She said and the dog has barked again. For a second, I wondered if he really understands what she is saying.

"Could you please find out? I don't have where to go…I beg you…"

I know that right now, I can't make the 'puppy eyes' that could give me everything that I ask for, I know that I can't be fake, I know that even with my eyes, I beg, I wish I could ask Sasuke all this… but if he would be here, I wouldn't ask for anything else than his simple presence. I would do anything that he would ask me to, I would accept all of his decisions, without hesitation, I would do anything, I would give my life, just to see him, just once…

Retrieved from my mind to the cruel reality, because of the sounds that her phone made while she forms a number.

In that moment, I thought that I have just two options while the phone called someone unknown.

The first one might be that she calls the police to throw me in jail.

The second one, it would be that she calls her agency to ask about the previous owner of this apartment.

I prayed for the second choice, but somehow, fate seems to hate me lately so I just stared, waiting patiently for my answer.

I stared alarmed when she got out of the room and talked on the phone. I couldn't hear anything because of the child and the mother that have begun to talk and the father just looked at me and at the house, plainly bored.

It felt like an eternity has passed until she came back. I really thought that she walked in the other room just for me, to do not hear when she will denounce me to the police, but just stared curious, when she came back with a smile while she spoke:

"This is the address; I wish you a safe trip."

I stared at the sheet that is for me. A small sheet with a neat handwriting, and I stared at her business smile and I took the sheet somehow hesitating. I looked at her and I asked:

"This is Sasuke's address?" I asked.

"Yes. Mr. Uchiha now lives in a not too far neighborhood. "

I stared at the sheet and I realized that I don't have a very good sense of direction, and that I have no idea how to get there but somehow, I got up and I took the dog with me.

I stopped at the door threshold, staring at how the woman in the suit that now presents my house to the very ordinary family; I stared while with every description she said about the rooms of my apartment, I felt how she just stabbed a knife in my heart, endlessly twisting where it hurt the most.

"This is the kitchen…"

'Where Sasuke and I ate every breakfast, lunch and dinner. If I think better, he always has been the only one who has cooked and the only one who has ever washed the dirty dishes. But he never seemed to be bothered by it and he has always…

"Why are you keep asking me if I need help, how do I sleep, what do I want, what do I need, if you done something wrong…is been over a week and you keep…"
A tear escaped from my eyes, without my will…I didn't disserved mercy …I was controlled by fear, by the fear of losing him and I was crying…this is so wrong…but what can I do more? I just can't stop my tears…
"I am sorry…I shouldn't have yelled at you…don't cry…what are you, a girl? Cheer up…Please… don't…"
I was at the kitchen's table and I was on a chair…Sasuke was now beside me, on a different chair, at my right, and he is holding my right hand in both of his hands, kissing it softly and keep saying to me to stop crying but I keep try to smile and to say…okay… but after that…tears betray me.'

„This has been an simple home office, but it could be a place for the child to study or..."

‚He took the glasses off and let them on the desk.

Tears started falling down from my eyes and I run until I reached his chair and hugged him.

"I don't like her, I don't care about her, I didn't know how to react, and I know that you were there but I didn't know how to make her go away… I was happy when you told her to stop…"
"You foul…"
I couldn't move, the tears were breaking my heart and when I pulled back to look at him when his words finally reached my ears…he kissed me…it was just peck…a long one…and I was so surprised … but it happened…and I didn't know what to do…I was so confused but when I was about to fall down on my back, just because my position was to go back…but I was stopped….he pulled me up, on my legs and hugged me…still…my face expression was so confused…'

"Don't ever let someone else touch you." ‚

"From this window you can have a wonderful view of the small park of the block…"

I know that it passed some hours from when I got here because it's already dark and the dog is in his box, trembling. I feel cold too but I can still handle it because I consume my energy in cutting the boards, knocking the nails, putting them to place, giving all of me and still haven't finished it yet.

"Hey…"
Sasuke is holding me, from my back. I haven't seen him at all. I didn't notice him…I was too attentive on all that I was doing.

"Is already 11… let's go inside." He said.

He put on me a jacket, bigger than mine, I think it was his and then I looked at him going to the dog with a blanket in his hands and picking up the dog with it. The dog was pleased by the warmness from the soft blanket Sasuke brought him.

„And this is the bedroom..."

‚"Tell me…"
I don't even know what he should say but something …anything….just to know what he thinks, wants, feels…

But he just pushed himself off of me and then looked in my eyes…his eyes showed just pain…not even a trace of something else…a pain that has so many sorrow in it that doesn't even leaves tears to escape…just dark and cold.

"Say…something…"
My words were just air passing beside him, he didn't intend to speak, and he just leaned forwards me…being an inch away from my mouth and he was breathing on my lips…'

Just then I closed my eyes, I opened them again and I've made a sign for the dog to come with me, I closed the door and I walked away from all those memories and realized that the house is not what it really matters, it's nothing without Sasuke there, it's as empty as it is now, but still...

It hurts to let go, it hurts to walk away with the possibility that I might never come back again and still, now, this isn't home, this is just a house.

I walked out of the block, and I stared at it while I felt insecure with myself, and lonely, but still, I looked at the small sheet and I smiled and then looked at the dog who moves his tail while looking at me.

I put my free hand on its head and I said:

„We can go home now."

To be continued…

It's been a while…huh…well, I tried, the truth is that it was already written but wasn't all and a lot of things happen but I am sure you don't care and you just want to kill me but anyway, I am sorry(even if everybody heard it quite often from me, it's true), and I will try more, I update all of my stories again, (time crisis…yeah again )and that is why there won't be more than 3.000 words per chapter, of course that if I don't have many ideas for the chapter and that might happen to 'I write sins not tragedies' but huh, hope I will finish it soon , ANYWAY, I thank for everybody who still reads this story , even if I am a jerk and I just finished reading It all again and I have a lot of mistakes and things I didn't mean to put in there, why did he cry so many times anyway? I could swear that this will be the first time he will cry or when he has been kissed by Sasuke for the first time, but after reading it again…it's not like that at all...Such an odd thing.

It will be rewritten soon but still, Thank you. A review would be kind, don't be too harsh…