Zoos and Stepmothers

Inspired by:

"Decatur, or Round of Applause for your Step Mother!" Sufjan Stevens

Kat wasn't as uncomfortable with her father having a new girlfriend as Bianca, but it was still totally bizarre. Of all the available women in the world, including the nice postwoman who used to hit on Walter (and then mysteriously disappeared from their route), Kat and Bianca's father had to pick the guidance counselor, Miss Tharp. And this woman was trying way too hard to get them to like her. Yesterday, she had offered to take the girls to the zoo. Like they were 5 years old or something. It might have been sweet if Kat didn't have such a strong objection to animals being in captivity. Kat recalled a trip to the Cleveland Zoo in the 5th grade, where all the animals just laid around all depressed looking in the hot sun. 10 year old Kat's animal activism might have began there at the sight of a lion with a broken spirit.

She had to hand it to Miss Tharp, though. She was an excellent addition to Kat's life in at least one way. Her dad was way too distracted (or not home) to see how often a certain deep voiced man boy was sneaking into her window at night. And how often (never) she told him to sleep on the floor. When Kat told him one night about Tharp asking if she could take them to the zoo, Patrick had let out a low chuckle from his chest and suggested she take her up on the offer.

"Patrick..." Kat protested. "Have you ever been to the zoo? Those poor animals have lost all of their will to live! Did you know that elephants are used to roaming constantly, and that there is controversy surrounding the fact that they have no choice but to stand in captivity putting a strain on them, and leading to chronic injury!" Patrick wore a sober look.

"Yeah, I've been to the zoo." Patrick explained. "My dad took me there once – the one in San Diego" Kat was quiet. And Patrick looked almost sad.

"The keychain..." Patrick's expression turned into a smirk.

"Oh yeah, I forgot how much a of a crazy stalker you were." He laughed playfully, pulling her body towards his.

"Hardy har." Kat responded, yielding, and rolling her eyes.

"Maybe you should be grateful your potential stepmother is so nice." Patrick offered. They were both thinking about the jackass.

"Well maybe you should take him," Kat laughed, "Give the alligators' a nice meal for a change." Patrick roared with laughter.

Kat sighed and thought she might give Miss Tharp a chance. After all, she probably didn't know how much could be improved when it came to animal conversation. Plus, this offer showed she was taking an active interest in animal life, maybe.

"I guess she's not so bad. after all he could've ended up dating Principal Holland", Kat grimaced at the thought.

After a short pause, Patrick added: "Plus...Miss Tharp's kind of hot."; which earned him a slap on the chest and a pillow in his face.