Disclaimer – I, sadly, do not own the character or the places within in this story, they all belong to the amazing J.K. Rowling. I also make no money from this fanfiction.

Summary – Remus gives Sirius advice on Hermione after Sirius is a complete jerk, and thankfully he follows it. SB/HG. Not compliant after book five, unless you just look past all the deaths, haha. OOC/AU I suppose.

No beta, so I apologize for any mistakes.

Warning – 18 and over readers only please. Sexual content, language.

"I just don't get it!"

Remus' head, which had been slowly lolling to the side, snapped back up. He blinked a few times, bringing a calloused hand up to rub the tiredness away from his eyes. "Are you still on about the same thing?" he asked, stifling a yawn.

"Are you falling asleep?" Sirius asked incredulously from across the table. "I can't believe you, Moony! I'm going through a crisis, and there you are, falling asleep! Some damn friend you are!"

Remus sighed, looking about the kitchen of Grimmauld Place, trying to remember what Sirius' 'crisis' was about. He ran a hand over his face again, pushing his sandy hair from his eyes, which were still begging to close, just for a moment. "I apologize, Padfoot," he said calmly, "but we've been at this for nearly six hours and you have yet to tell me what the hell happened."

"Yes, but you owe me at least another four," Sirius said, absently pushing a few loose strands of black hair from his now-creased forehead. "I sat with you for ten hours straight when you were trying to decide whether or not to be with Tonks."

"Please don't remind me," Remus groaned, the thought of his soon-to-be-ex-wife causing his fists to involuntarily clench.

"Sorry, mate," Sirius said, sounding truly remorseful. "That tosser she was sleeping with will get his one day, don't you worry."

"Shut up," Remus said, slamming his forehead against the table. "I don't want to hear you make empty threats against the parts of him that have been within in wife… again. Just tell me about your crisis, Sirius, please."

Sirius wanted to say something more on the git that had Remus all pissed off. Why? Because when Remus was upset, Sirius was upset. When Remus hurt, Sirius hurt. And hurting Remus was. Tonks had been cheating on him for nearly two years, sleeping with none other than her cousin's husband, Rodolphus Lestrange.

No one knew why, and Remus hadn't stopped to ask anything other than how long it had been going on when he walked in on them a few months previous. He had taken Teddy and filed for divorce immediately. What had hurt him the worst, though, was that Tonks hadn't even fought him when he went for full custody of Teddy.

"Sirius," Remus said, interrupting Sirius' thoughts. "Are you going to talk or are we just going to sit in silence for the next four hours until my debt is paid off?"

"I just don't know what to do, Remus," Sirius said, sighing heavily.

Remus was glad that Sirius was mildly self-centered and easily distracted; he didn't want to talk about Tonks or her lover anymore. "Start from the beginning; tell me exactly what led up to right now."

"Well," Sirius started, finally giving in, "this morning I was sitting in the library, minding my own business when…"

Flashback

"Sirius?"

Her voice broke through his sleepy brain and forced his eyes towards the door, where she was standing in nothing but a skimpy nightgown, her copper hair loose and cascading down her front, just barely covering her breasts over the flimsy fabric she wore.

"Hermione," he replied, nodding his head in acknowledgement.

"Why are you in here at five twenty in the morning?" she asked, leaning against the door frame, her head cocking to the side.

"Well," he started, shifting in his armchair, "I got completely plastered last night, and didn't feel as though I could make it to my bedroom."

"Oh," she said, pushing against the frame and turning, as though to leave.

"Hermione!" he called, not wanting her to leave yet.

She turned, sighing, and lifted an eyebrow. "Yes, Sirius?"

"Since you're up, why don't you stay and we'll have a chat?"

Hermione shrugged and walked fully into the room, plopping down on the couch, and throwing her legs up to cover the rest of the cushions as she leaned back. Sirius watched her, hoping that perhaps the nightgown would ride up enough so that he could get a peek at her….

"Sirius!" Remus interrupted, his head in his hands. "Just get to the point, I don't need mental images!"

"Right, yeah, sorry."

The conversation was easy and flowing. They talked of frivolous things such as movies and books and food. The goofy banter slowly changed to a deeper subject as Sirius asked Hermione how her love life was going. She waved his question away, blushing slightly as she told him that, since her breakup with Ron nearly three years previous, Sirius, Remus, and Severus (who had moved in not too long ago at the request of Minerva) were the only men in her life. Sirius had chuckled and told her she needed to acquire better taste in men.

"I resent that statement," Remus said, pursing his lips slightly.

Sirius rolled his eyes. "Anyway!"

Hermione had laughed and rolled her eyes. "Oh, please, who could ask for anyone better than you and Remus and Severus?"

Sirius shrugged. "You can't think that way forever, Hermione, you'll need to find a good man to marry and have kids with."

Hermione was silent for awhile. She finally sat up, looking at her bare feet, refusing to meet Sirius' eyes anymore.

"Hermione?" She still didn't look at him. "What's wrong? Did I say something wrong? It wouldn't be a surprise if I did."

He heard her chuckle softly and then sniffle. Shit. He'd made her cry.

"What if…?" Hermione started, wiping her cheek with the back of her hand. "What if I didn't want that with someone else?"

"What do you mean?" he asked, confused.

"What if I didn't want to be married or have children with anyone other than someone who already lives here?"

Sirius' eyebrows came together and after a moment it all clicked into place.

"You have feeling for someone here?"

"Yes," she whispered.

Sudden jealousy filled him, thinking that the only two options were Remus or Severus. He couldn't deny that either would be a wonderful match for the brilliant twenty-five year old sitting in front of him, but that wasn't what he wanted. He wanted her. He wanted her to want him. He had for years, really, but he could never act on it because he was Sirius, bad boy extraordinaire, and settling down wasn't his style. Hermione deserved better than a good screwing here and there; she deserved a partner, a friend and a lover. He didn't know how to be those things. The thought of her with anyone else, though, made his blood boil.

"That's ridiculous!" Sirius shouted. "How could you have feelings for someone nearly twice your age, Hermione? That's simply disgusting and I can't believe you aren't smart enough to take into account that they could be your fathers! Have you ever stopped to think about that?"

"What?" Remus nearly yelled. "How… how could you be so cruel?"

"I don't know!" Sirius groaned, looking slightly deranged as he raked his hands through his hair. "I was just so jealous and angry and…."

"Being a prick!" Remus added, appalled at his friend.

"It gets worse," Sirius said slowly.

"How can it get worse?" Remus asked nervously.

"Well, after that…"

Sirius was so angry at the thought of her with another man he didn't stop and think about the words that were pouring out of his mouth.

"Snape is nothing but a nasty old man, always playing with his damn potions kit and belittling you. Maybe you like that sort of thing, eh, Hermione? Are you one of those girls who enjoys being put down to the point that you break? Do you like it when he calls you a 'know-it-all twit'? Is that what turns you on?"

"Sirius!"

"I know!" he shouted. "Just shut up and listen!"

Hermione was crying in earnest, but Sirius was on a roll, rage and jealousy filling him so heavily it took over any coherent thought. It wasn't something he was used to feeling in the least, so he didn't know how to handle it. It was so consuming and so heartbreaking at the same time that he felt the need to hurt her too.

"Or Remus, who's going through such a horrid time right now," he plowed on, no thought to the sobs that were leaving the small witch a few feet away. "Maybe you like the idea of being the heroine, coming in to pick up the broken pieces of a shattered man. Perhaps you like that he's so horribly messed up he won't even think twice when you press that little body up against him, only to comfort him, of course. Or at least that's what you'll tell yourself when you try to 'show him that he really is an incredible, capable man', eh?"

Remus had no words. His mouth was hanging open and his eyes were the size of dinner plates, staring at his best friend, who had his head hung in shame.

"So which one is it, Hermione?" he asked, seething, his own words making him angrier, if that was even possible. "Which man in this house is the one who puts your knickers in a twist? You can tell me, Hermione, really. Where's that goddamn Gryffindor courage?"

"Fuck you!" Hermione screamed, jumping off the couch and facing him, tears pouring down her face. "Fuck you, Sirius! How dare you?"

"I'll fucking tell you, you little harlot!"

"The hell you will!" she screamed, her cheeks bright red and her eyes swollen. "Have you ever stopped for one bloody second to think that perhaps it's you? Of course not, you bastard! You talk of Severus belittling me, when there's no one better at it than you! Why I ever fell in love with you, I will never have any idea! All you do is saunter around like you're hot shit, whoring around with anyone who has a vagina! And here I am, waiting for the day you'll realize what a jackass you are, and how I've been in front of you the whole time! But no, that's a bloody pipe dream, and I'm stupid to have ever thought it! I hope you enjoy your whores and what I'm sure is going to prove to be a VERY lonely life!"

She stormed out of the room, her sobs continuing to filter in until he heard her bedroom door shut. That was the first time in two decades that Sirius had hung his head and cried. He hadn't the faintest of an idea as to why tears filled his eyes and streamed down his face, but there they were, hot and angry.

Currently, Remus' elbows rested upon the table, his fingers laced together and his chin resting atop them. "I hope you know that I have no feelings for Hermione."

Sirius rubbed his eyes. "I know that, Remus," he said. "But for some reason, just for a moment, I thought she had them for you."

"We do love each other," he said. "However, it's nothing other than platonic."

"I know."

"You're lucky she didn't kill you," Remus said.

Sirius nodded. "I've been waiting for her to come back downstairs, her wand drawn."

"Would you blame her?" Remus asked quietly.

Sirius sighed. "I'm almost hoping for it."

"You're a real bastard, you know that, right?" Remus asked in a completely neutral voice.

"Yes," Sirius said immediately. "I'm a complete tosser, a screw up, an idiot, I know."

"So, what are you going to do now?" Remus asked.

Sirius finally met his friend's eyes. "That's what I came to talk to you about. What do I do?"

Remus shrugged. "You could start by telling her that you love her."

Sirius opened his mouth to protest, but there was no reason to. He'd confessed his feelings for Hermione months ago to Remus. It hadn't mattered that he'd gone through nearly an entire bottle of Ogden's finest; Remus knew Sirius never lied while drunk. He hadn't been surprised, honestly. Sirius was always following Hermione around, teasing her until she'd blow and spar with him until the wee hours of the morning.

And if Remus really wanted to dig deep, Sirius had only brought a random woman home a few times in the past two years, rather than every night. And Remus also knew, for a fact, that Sirius had only slept with one or two of them, which was shocking enough that Remus thought of having Sirius committed to St. Mungo's. It wasn't until he saw Sirius with Hermione that it all clicked in to place.

"I can't," Sirius said, shaking his head. "She hates me now."

"Could you ever hate her?" Remus asked. "Even if she said those things to you?"

"No," Sirius said, sighing.

"You don't deserve her," Remus pointed out.

"I know that."

"But she wants you."

"I know," Sirius said again.

"I need to ask you something, Sirius."

"Ask away."

"If you do tell her, and she accepts, would you be with her?"

"What do mean?" Sirius asked, cocking an eyebrow.

Remus rolled his eyes. "Would you be in a relationship with her? Would you stop sleeping with no-names and commit to her?"

"If she accepted, yes," Sirius replied instantly. "I love her, Remus, and I can't even look at another woman without thinking that Hermione's prettier, or smarter, or just plain better. I don't want anyone but her."

Remus was practically gaping at Sirius. "You're for real about this, aren't you?"

"Yes," Sirius sighed. "What do I do, Moony?"

Remus sighed, frustrated. "You better just go to her, Sirius, because I have a feeling that she won't stick around and wait for you anymore."

"Really?"

"Yes," Remus said, shaking his head. "She's been packing for the last few hours."

Sirius shot up and out of his chair. "How the hell do you know that?"

"I can hear her, remember? Super hearing and all that?"

"Oh," Sirius said, pacing the length of the table. "What am I supposed to say to her?"

"Go upstairs and just tell her that you love her, and then just let her make her choices, Sirius," Remus explained. "But don't be surprised if she turns you down. I would."

Sirius knew there was a joke to be made about that, but he was too upset to really muster anything. Instead, he gathered that Black courage and walked out of the kitchen.

"Sirius!" Remus called just as Sirius was exiting. Sirius turned. "Good luck, mate, I'm pulling for you."

"Thanks," Sirius muttered before turning back around and heading up the stairs.

His breathing was heavy and his heart was pounding in his chest as he stood in front of Hermione's door. He knocked lightly, holding his breath when he heard footsteps. The door was swung open with force and then Hermione was standing before him, still in that little nightgown and her hair messy. She stared up at him, her lips forming a solid line as her chest rose and fell, her eyes widening. Sirius opened his mouth to say something, but was stopped short as Hermione slapped him hard across the face.

"I deserved that," he said, his voice just above a whisper.

She slapped him again, tears filling her eyes.

"We're going to be here a long time, Hermione, if you intend to give me all that I deserve."

She went for a third time, but Sirius caught her wrist just before her hand connected with his face.

"I hate you," she ground out, but her face gave her away completely as a tear trickled down her cheek.

"Well, that's too bad, Hermione, because I love you," he said, closing the foot between them, pressing his body against hers.

Before she could say anything more, Sirius leaned down and crushed his lips to hers. Hermione gasped and Sirius took the opportunity to take her mouth, his tongue plunging between her teeth, his hand going to the nape of her neck. She responded quickly, kissing him back so passionately it made him lightheaded.

She whimpered as he released her hand and put his arm around her waist, holding her against him as tightly as he could, afraid she would kill him if he pulled back. Her hands threaded into his dark, silky hair, all her anger leaving her as his tongue stroked hers. He stepped into her and she stepped back, and they shuffled awkwardly over the threshold of her bedroom.

Sirius turned them, never breaking the kiss, closed the door, and slammed Hermione against the closed door. She unconsciously pushed her hips into his as his hand roamed lower on her back, barely touching the top of her rounded bottom. Sirius lost all cautious thought and broke the kiss, leaning down to grasp the backs of her thighs. Hermione understood and wrapped her arms around his neck, helping to support her weight as he lifted her, her legs wrapping around his hips.

"I hate you," Hermione repeated, panting as Sirius' mouth latched onto her neck, sucking on a piece of her sensitive skin.

Instead of replying, Sirius rotated his hips, his obvious hardened member rubbing against her sex. She cried out from the friction and rubbed herself against him, loving the sound of him groaning as she dug her nails into his shoulders. His hands ran up the back of her thighs, moaning as he came into contact with her bare buttocks, gently squeezing the soft flesh.

Hermione retracted her hands and pulled at her nightgown until Sirius had the common sense to pull away from the door, supporting her weight as she yanked the material over her head, throwing it aside before slamming her lips to his once again. Their tongues met in a fury of lips and teeth, angry passion consuming them until they had to breathe.

"Sirius," she moaned when he finally noticed her breasts were bare and had decided to taste them.

He groaned, his lips capturing a puckered nipple, sucking it into his mouth, his tongue stroking it in slow circles. The sensation became too much to handle, and Hermione yanked on Sirius' shoulder length hair, forcing his head back, only to crush her lips to his, kissing him deeply. He turned them and headed to the bed, breaking the kiss and laying her down.

"Clothes," Hermione panted, urging Sirius back by pressing her hands into his shoulders.

He clumsily got off of her, peeling his shirt above his head as he stood fully, revealing his toned, tattoo-covered torso. His eyes raked over her nude body, taking in her slender neck, her full breasts and flat stomach, to the small V of chestnut pubic hair, her supple thighs and muscular calves.

"You're so beautiful," he whispered, meeting her caramel eyes, which were trained upon his own.

She blushed and battered her eyelashes, making Sirius' heart skip a beat. "Sirius, please remove your clothing."

She said it so nonchalantly he nearly laughed. "Anything you want, Love."

She smiled up at him, watching his long fingered hands as they slowly undid his belt before sliding the button to his jeans through the hole, the zipper soon following. He stepped on one sock, slipping his foot out of it before repeating it with the other foot. His hands went back to the top of his pants, his thumbs hooking around the top and into his boxers, slowly sliding both garments down his legs.

Hermione's eyes widened as he stood back up, the length of his arousal shocking her. 'No wonder everyone calls him a sex God,' she thought. He gingerly stepped out of his pants before crawling up the bed, settling himself between Hermione's legs, his body covering hers, resting his weight on his elbows, which were on either side of her head.

Hermione stared into his bright blue eyes. Her mind spun as he slowly lowered his lips to her own. This kiss was slower than all the others; it was gentle and sweet, lingering and loving. Sirius nibbled on Hermione's bottom lip, loving the low groan that left her throat. He ran his hand along her smooth thigh, kissing her more deeply as her leg came up to wrap around his waist. They moaned simultaneously from being pushed together so closely. She lifted her other leg to join the first without prompting. Sirius broke the kiss and put his forehead to hers.

"Are you sure you want this?" Sirius panted. "It's not too late go to back."

"Please, Sirius," Hermione groaned. "I want you so badly."

"Tell me you love me."

Sirius pulled away from her to look her in the eyes. Hermione brought her hand up and stroked Sirius' cheek, which was surprisingly void of stubble, a smile gracing her face. "I love you, Sirius."

"I love you, too, Hermione," he whispered in such an intimate tone that nearly made Hermione cry before reclaiming her mouth passionately.

Sirius reached a hand between them, pulling his hips back as he positioned himself at her entrance. The kiss was broken when they both cried out as Sirius slowly slid his thick girth into her sopping tightness inch by blissful inch. Her walls enveloped him, constricting him so tightly he stopped only halfway within her, his breathing heavy from the pure pleasure shooting down his spine. Hermione panted against his lips and her hands trembled as they cupped his jaw, leaning her chin up slightly so their lips pressed together more. He sucked her full bottom lip into his mouth, running his tongue over it as he pressed further within her. She whimpered as his teeth sunk lightly into her lip just as he hit bottom deeply inside her.

Sirius lifted his hand, bringing his fingers to her cheek and stroking it with a gentleness that Hermione wouldn't have been able to imagine coming from him until that moment. His hand raked into her hair and he moved his hips back, pulling away until he was nearly completely out of her before easily sliding back in. Hermione quivered at the feel of his large manhood slickly moving within her, back and forth, back and forth. Every move felt amplified; it felt as though electricity was running down her legs and up her spine at the same time. Sirius moaned against her mouth when she pressed the heels of her feet into his upper thighs, raising her hips to meet his, forcing him more deeply into her wet cavern.

"So wet," he panted between kisses. "So tight."

Hermione arched against him, his hand that had been twined in her hair running down her neck and to her breast, massaging it before whispering his fingers over her hardened nipple.

"Sirius," she moaned as he quickened his pace.

He felt himself twitch within her and he paused, buried deep. "Gods, I love it when you say my name."

Hermione put her cheek against his, her lips ghosting over his ear. "Sirius," she whispered huskily, nuzzling his face, causing him to gasp. "Sirius." She licked the shell of his ear before lightly biting it, nearly squealing in delight when he moaned and jerked his hips. "Sirius."

His breath was coming out in harsh pants, his hips unconsciously bucking against her every time she moaned his name. His arm snaked beneath her lower back as she met one of his thrusts, raising her hips off the bed. She whimpered and moaned his name again when he began making long, deep thrusts, their lips and tongues meeting again in a passionate, sloppy kiss. Her arm went beneath his that was beside her head and her nails sought purchase along his shoulder blade and his back, ripping a loud moan from his chest.

"Faster," she panted.

Sirius obliged her, driven by the desire in her voice, the feel of her walls contracting around him. He felt himself losing control and he quickened his pace, raising her further off of the bed, pounding into her willing, tight body with unrestrained lust. He broke the kiss, their breathing and moans too heavy. He groaned as she arched, her nails raking down his back, sending shivers down his legs. She cried out as he hit a spot deeply within her, his lips attaching to her neck, his tongue stroking her salty skin.

"Come for me, Love," Sirius moaned. "I won't last much longer inside your tight little body."

She screamed his name as he made quick, deep thrusts, hitting that spot over and over until a flash of light burst from behind her eyes. Her toes curled and her nails sunk into his back as he continued pounding into her, her control slipped and then was completely nonexistent, her release consuming her. Her slippery walls tightening around him, her screaming his name over and over, and the nails dug into his back, it was all too much for Sirius. Her body was still shaking with the aftermath of her orgasm, and he made one last, deep thrust and came deeply within her, bringing her body as closely to his as possible, her name falling from his tongue.

Her arms wrapped around him, holding his sweaty body to her own, the feel of his heated skin against hers made her tremble in delight. "Please stay," she pleaded breathlessly.

Sirius nearly asked her why she would ask him that, but he already knew the answer. In this situation, with anyone but her, he would have been half dressed by now, fleeing the room without a second look back. He looked into her caramel eyes and smiled crookedly. "I'll stay as long as you'd like me to."

Hermione smiled back up into his baby blues. "You may want to owl Remus, because I don't know if he's ever going to see you again."

Sirius chuckled, but the sound changed to a groan as Hermione's lips found his heatedly. Maybe being a bad boy extraordinaire was overrated. In fact, as Hermione's arms tightened around him, the feel of her naked, perfect body beneath him, he was sure of it.

They were so caught up in each other that Sirius hadn't even noticed that there were no boxes full of clothing and books, nor were any of Hermione's belongings missing from the room. Downstairs, Remus smiled and took one last sip of his warm tea before walking out the door to go get Teddy from Harry and Ginny's.

A/N – Please take just two seconds out to push that new little button and review! Thank you!!