A/N: Can someone explain to me how fifty people have this on alert, and yet I somehow only managed to get four reviews for the last two chapters? I don't get it.

Anyway, in my first author's note, on the very first chapter, I commented on the fact that I was starting the story at chapter forty-two of STWAOES, and how that was cool. After I wrote chapter thirty-nine, I realized that the rest of the story was going to fit extraordinarily well into three more chapters, and then I got really, really excited.

That's right. This story has forty-two chapters. As I am a geek, that makes me supremely happy. Thank you, oh great gods of coincidence! Also, the fact that I am posting this last chapter on the exact two-year anniversary of when I posted chapter one just makes this feel like a hugely momentous occasion. O_o

Epilogue

I'm not really sure how long we sat there in silence after the explosion, but it felt like quite a while. I hadn't known Professor Henry very long at all, but I had liked him a lot. He had risked torture and imprisonment to free us, and now he had given up his life so that neither Fang nor I would have to.

I hadn't even known his first name.

The silence was suddenly interrupted by a small, choked sob. I wasn't sure if it was Nudge or Angel, and I didn't have any room to turn around and check.

I moved my small light over the door, searching for a handle. I found the only thing that looked plausible and shoved at it.

The air that washed over me was like nothing I had ever experienced. It was choked with ash and smelled like smoke and burnt plastic, but somehow it was still one of the most wonderful things I had ever tasted.

I knew that after this, no fake reality was ever going to fool me again.

I stepped out into the ruins, feeling ash land on my shoulders and head. Thankfully, there was no body anywhere nearby. I knew the younger ones would have found that very hard to deal with.

The others followed me out, and I heard the owner of the choked sob begin to cry fully. It was now easy to identify as Angel. As terrible as I felt, I couldn't help but be slightly relieved. After the stunt she had pulled with Jeb, I had been a little worried that she was lacking some fundamental sense of empathy.

As I made my way over to Angel, I catalogued the states of the others. Fang looked slightly haunted, but he was stoic as always and I knew he would be fine. Iggy had knelt down to feel the ground. He seemed to still be processing the difference between the fake outdoors and the real one. Nudge was crying, but she was doing it silently. The tears streaming down her cheeks somehow seemed less like despair and more like simple tears of sadness. I think that I tended to forget just how indomitable Nudge could be. Gazzy had tears on his cheeks also, but he was looking around in wonder at the sky and the trees and the rubble, and I knew that he wouldn't let his grief stop him from appreciating our newfound freedom.

Doctor Jones looked miserable and the Director looked indifferent, but I couldn't bring myself to care about anyone outside of my flock when Angel looked as terrible as she did.

"Hey," I said, kneeling down next to her and enfolding her in a hug.

She sniffled into my shoulder. "Why, Max? Why did he have to die?"

I couldn't answer that. I couldn't give her a decent reason for the fact that a good man like Professor Henry had died while the instigator of everything horrible in our lives was standing a few feet away from us, perfectly alive.

The world isn't fair. I had learned that a long time before, but I guess now it was Angel's turn to realize it.

So instead of trying to explain any of it, I just sat there and held her as she cried it all out.

A few minutes after Angel's sobs had died down into a series of small sniffles, Gazzy broke the silence that had fallen over the group.

"She knew."

We all followed his pointing finger to the Director, who looked startled and just a little bit scared by his unfriendly tone of voice.

"What did she know?" I asked, sliding Angel gently off of my lap and standing up. I had a niggling feeling that I was about to be very angry.

"She knew that we wouldn't all fit in the bunker," Gazzy said. "She knew it was tiny."

Now that he said that, it made perfect sense. It was her building, of course she would know how big the emergency bunker was.

"Jeb said it," Gazzy continued, "but I didn't know what he meant."

I had been right. I was now very angry.

"What was I supposed to do?" the Director exclaimed, taking a step back. I guess she saw the fury in my eyes. "If I had told you that someone wasn't going to fit, who would have been left behind? Me!"

"Yes," I said, "and that's the way it should have happened."

Her face twisted into an unattractive scowl. "You would think that, but how do you know? You're not God."

"No," I replied, "but neither are you, and you've tried to play at it more than I ever have. We're living proof of that."

Fang stepped up beside me. "I think you should leave. None of us like you, especially not now."

"We're in Death Valley!" she retorted. "Where am I supposed to go?"

"I don't know and I don't care," Fang said. "I suppose it's your choice, but trust me, your chances with us aren't very good."

Without another word, she turned around and stalked away.

I turned to face my flock, who had gathered into a loose semi-circle behind me and Fang.

"So… We're out," I said. "We're free."

"Yep," Iggy agreed. "What now?"

It was the question that I had been thinking but hadn't wanted to ask. I was the leader, I was supposed to answer questions like that.

"Well," I said slowly, "I guess we… travel. See what we've been missing. Find out how much of what they invented for us is real."

"The templates were all real locations," Doctor Jones said, joining our pow-wow. "New York City, Colorado, Virginia… They all really look like that. We may have taken a few liberties, but not many."

"What about people?" Iggy asked hopefully.

Doctor Jones shook his head. "I'm sorry, Iggy, but your parents don't actually exist. Neither does Tess."

Iggy's face fell. "Oh. I guess I should have known that she was too perfect for me to be real."

"And I don't have a mom and a sister in Arizona," I concluded. Doctor Jones nodded. "Please tell me Jeb wasn't actually my dad."

"He wasn't," the doctor said. "He just enjoyed messing with you."

"Bastard," I said unfeelingly. It seemed wrong to hold a grudge against a dead man, however sadistic he had been.

"Doctor," Fang said suddenly, "what was Professor Henry's first name?"

Doctor Jones looked surprised by the question, but promptly answered, "William."

Fang nodded. "Alright, thank you. I propose a moment of silence in honor of Professor William Henry, a man who gave us everything and lost everything in return."

I smiled at Fang gratefully and reached over to take his hand. He had remembered to ask the question that I had almost immediately forgotten about, and turned it into a more poetic tribute than I could have managed.

He squeezed my hand, and we both dropped our chins slightly to remember and give thanks.

We were all silent for at least a minute before I raised my head.

"Okay, guys," I said, "I think it's about time we left this place behind."

"Agreed," Iggy said emphatically.

I looked up at the sky, which was overcast with the remains of the thunderstorm but sort of beautiful all the same.

I smiled and extended my wings for the first time in what felt like years. "Let's find out how it really feels to fly."

A/N: And that is the end of Pinch Me, I Must Be Dreaming. Now here comes my long, heartfelt speech.

First, I just have to thank everyone who read the story, even if some of you didn't make it to the end (and therefore aren't even reading this). If you read it at all, thank you. If you reviewed, thank you even more. If you stayed with me through all of my inconsistent updating, thank you so very much. I can't even imagine how frustrating that must have been, and for one last time, I apologize.

I know a lot of people go back and find all of the usernames of people who reviewed and list them here in a big thank you note, but frankly, I don't really have the time or the patience for that. That doesn't mean I don't appreciate every review I've gotten. I really, really do. Thank you all. For the time being, I feel like this story is one of the better things I've written, and having a few other people along for the ride has been very rewarding. There were times I almost got so frustrated as to give up on it, and you people are what stopped me from doing so. (Yes, that was kind of sappy. Sorry.) I've also made an excellent friend from this story. Thanks for everything, AmyQueen95. =]

And secondly... Well, I don't think I'm actually resigning from FFN as I thought I was going to be, because a few Fullmetal Alchemist ideas have been plaguing me and I may feel the need to get them out. However, I am almost certainly resigning from the Maximum Ride fandom. I had toyed with the idea of a Pinch Me sequel, but I'm just not that interested in the characters anymore, and I really don't want to get into another long fanfiction that's going to hold me back from working on much of anything else.

I've been on fanfiction for three years now, and in those three years, I've learned so much about my writing and what I'm capable of. The writing improvement to time ratio has never been quite so impressive for me. All three of those years have been spent among the people of the Maximum Ride fandom, and leaving is honestly going to make me quite sad. I wish I could say I was still planning to stay among you all by reading and reviewing fanfictions, but unless they're part of a series I'm still reading or from an author I already know, that's not true. It actually hasn't been for a while now. Like I said, while I'll always have an attachment to the characters, they're not really doing it for me anymore. If any of you happen to be in the Doctor Who or Fullmetal Alchemist fandoms (or any others I happen to pick up along the way), I might see you there. Otherwise, this is probably goodbye.

You have no idea how much I'm going to treasure this last batch of reviews, and the more it contains, the more I'll treasure it. -shameless hint hint nudge nudge-

Arrividerci, my friends. I hope you enjoyed Pinch Me, I Must Be Dreaming as much as I did.