Chapter two

A cute, doll-like girl, unstained from the previous days " entertainment" shifted in a snow-white bed, the coverlet the only blemish upon the purity; an inky black pool bedded by ice.

Slowly, the girl rose from her shield against the wakening world, opening a pair of cerulean blue and purple eyes and noticed one thing:

Her servant was not bugging her to get up and it definitely was not a Friday… which meant…

"BLAZE ALICE-FREDERICK EVEREST! A cry of annoyance echoed throughout the Blackheart Mansion.

In China, a redheaded demoness sneezed rather violently.

Huffing in annoyance at how the day had already started off, the small duchess stuck out a pair of slender legs out of the bed and stuffed on a pair of rather fluffy bed slippers. "Fuck this. If she's not here, I'm going to wear what I like, not those abominations she dubs dresses." Shuffling to her wardrobe (which she insisted that she kept in the room, and not in her fashion-obsessed demon's room, which she heavily suspected of molesting her old outfits… Somehow.) She threw open the wooden doors, then shuddered at the sight.

"How Blaze stands upon looking at these monsters of ultra disaster, I will never know and I hope to never know… So many frills…Must. Resist. Urge. To. Burn!" Shoving her natural instinct to burn such feminine things aside, she dug out a familiar, hugely baggy white dress shirt and some random pair of black breeches that went to her knees. Her daily black buckle boots would stretch up to aforementioned knees, so she didn't have to look like one of those London idiots with a gullet as far as their arm.

Humming happily, she exited the room with a strange skip, slamming the door as she went. Some good came out of Blaze not being there to supervise her, it seemed.

But even as she raced down the hallway in her odd joyful walk, the walls seemed to be shuffling doors- and not in the normal, logical way either. It seemed to be gathering together, like so many cards in a deck.

Indeed, it began its way in piling its way in her path, again, like a deck of cards.

Mirror's eye twitched. "Just because Blaze isn't here to supervise you doesn't mean you can push me around, Beeeeeeeeeetttttoooooo."

The deck of doors vibrated, whether in challenge or in laughter the little insane one. Laughing or moving doors weren't all that logical in the first place, so Mirror couldn't really be sure.

However, it's never good to poke the hungry (and possessing of questionable sanity) dragon with a figuratively sharp stick. And by the way, Mirror was one sadistic dragon.

"Look here, if you don't let me get through to eat, I'll shove a white-hot poker up your Asses. THIS IS MY TURF, AND GOD-MOTHER FUCK IT YOU WILL OBEY ME. I DON'T GIVE A FUCK HOW LONG IT WILL TAKE TO FIX YOU IF I BREAK YOU. I OWN YOU LIKE I OWN MY CAT. I want food. ROOOOOAR!" Mirror roared; her short arms thrown up into the air and making irritated flapping movements and her eyes seemingly glowing with a vengeance as her mouth curled into a cruel snarl.

With a nearly comical haste the doors scrambled back into their proper places, and Mirror smiled with a childish sweetness. "Glad we could sort that out my lovelies!" With that, she began her way once more towards the kitchens.

"Suddenly, I have a craving for red velvet caaaaaaaaakeeee…" she mused absently, patting her stomach. "But as Blaze is the only one around here who's got any sort of competence in sweets that are relatively English…"

She abruptly stopped in her path. "Hahaha! In Tsarist Russia God fucks you, Blaze!" The Tsars had always amused her. She followed Russian history with a passion. Even though her annoying demon thing was from there, Russia had such a tragic history and such cruel and terrible leaders. The past of Russia made sympathetic motions that lay dormant inside her move.

That or she had bad heartburn.

"Mistress?" a decidedly male voice rang from a place close to her immediate left.

Mirror flew around to see an Asian boy standing behind her, possessing of an odd smirk, which she answered with a pout.

"Hey lovely, Rin-Rin. I'm hungry. Make me food. Actually, make me cake. Cake that is Red Velvet Cake. Said Red Velvet cake should and will have a tower of whip cream, cherries, red and white sprinkles and tons of gummy bears. But no yellow ones. I hate the yellow ones. I hate the color yellow all together. So yeah, as your god, I commandth you to make me-th the cake…Th."

"Make Blaze do it." He countered instantly, his homeland's trademark features shifting into displeasure as he did so.

"She ditched me so she could molest food in another country," Mirror retorted, a mild sweat drop forming on her ivory features. "When she knows that we have our own little Chinese boy right here. Lazy asshole…Doing everything the hard way…and why else would I be asking you?" Erin Electric was her Chef after all. Duh.

"Because I'm awesome," The Asian boy retorted.

Mirror cracked a small grin at that. "No, that's why I hired you."

"Oh, really now? I was hired because I was awesome? My heart is touched…oh wait, that was heartburn." Erin asked, adopting a wry smile.

"Yes, you were. But do keep it down when you have your sex and angst moments regarding Arin; I can hear you two all the way back in my room and if the city stops having its own fornicating of the borders between the country and the city all of which I happen to be disturbingly close to I will be forced to take rather drastic measures. I hate being woken up from my sleep as much I hate French and I hate the French just like a true proper English gentleman should! So you shall face the wrath of my foot up your ass unless you quiet yourselves down. I don't care if you're a screamer boy. I own you like I own my cat. Don't make me go Russian on you."

A wash of red flashed across the boy's face. " E-er, y-yes Mistress." He stammered out to the floor, all of a sudden unable to meet the younger girl's eyes.

Mirror grinned fully in victory... not that her embarrassed servant would ever see it. Ah. She loved being her.

"C'mon Erin, let's put aside your questionable sex habits aside and turn to eating breakfast."

The boy groaned. "Yes mistress."

Mirror patted a hand on the boy's ebony spikes, much as if you would do to a dog. "Good boy."

"I hate you."

"That's what she said."

:::::: Late in the afternoon:::::::::

"Oh I'm so scar–" The Undertaker was in the middle of a hugging a doll mannequin that poorly represented the human body when the door of the Undertaker's place of work was thrown open rather angrily; the door slamming against the opposite wall.

"Undeeeeeeeeeertaker," The owner of the foot that had slammed the door complained. It was a female by the tone of voice and was someone who was obviously from the more rural part of England because of her slightly thicker accent. She wore a black hat with a black heart pierced by a sword and an arrow on the brim, a huge white dress shirt, black breeches that went to her knees and knee-high black boots.

"Oh hello~~! What brings you here Mirror~~?" The Undertaker peered at the female. "Did Erin and Arin finally off themselves~?"

"Sadly, no." Mirror sighed. "But I looooooooost Blaaaaaaze." She whined.

"How do you lose a person?" the strange, possibly insane man asked curiously.

"Fuckin' hell like I know. I'll get back to you on it though."

"Ah, didn't Blaze teach you not to swear?"

"Stuff a scalpel up your butt Fluffy, Blaze swears more than that old guy at church does."

"Ah~ You two are such a lovely pair~"

The one named Mirror scoffed. "Scoff, I say, scoff. We get along as good as oil and water. No, we get along as well as me and my perverted French neighbor."

"But ah you two are so adorable together!"

"That damn Austrian–"

"Russian."

"Whatever. That damn German –"

"Russian."

"Don't care. That damn French–"

"Russian."

Mirror made a noise that sounded like she had attempted to speak Russian while eating taffy. "I don't care. All I know is that I lost my six-foot-fucking-two, red-haired, blue-and-purple eyed Russian servant. Again."

"Well she could have gone down to the Dis–"

Mirror made that noise again. "We will not speak of that incident fluffy! It was like walking in on your parents fornicating! I may not have parents to speak of this, but I know people who have and there are some things you. Can. Never. Un-see."

"But you're an orphan."

"Oh thank you for pointing out the obvious. Would you like a gold star?" the girl asked waspishly, and the undertaker giggled.

"Oh I never knew you to be so generous Mirror~"

Mirror made that noise once more. "Whatever. Have you seen Blaze? She's been missing since like four this morning and damnit, I had to make Erin cook. I don't know about you, but Chinese food at seven o'clock in the morning doesn't agree with my digestive tract."

"Eh? But you love the stuff!"

"Yes, I do, but not the point, I am in a crisis because I have to go visit the Old Chick up in Birmingham and listen to her cry about her husband, again, and then I have dance lessons, for like no reason, and then I have to deal with that at home and it's stupid lessons and then I have to deal Erin and Arin and their completely gay love with each other and their angry sex while they angst over the fuck that neither of them like each other when they are obviously in love with each other... Fuck it, where is the nearest butchery? I'm seriously going to choke her with a cow's intestine and use it to make gum!"

Undertaker sighed and patted the girl's head.
"Ah, poor Mirror~ So lost without her servant~"

"Fuck you Fluffy."

"So crude you are." The undertaker commented cheerfully, reaching out a long fingered hand-perhaps to pat her head once more, which the subject of possible patting rather loudly voiced.

"Yes, yes- Wait! No, damnit! Don't put your hand on my head again!"

She attempted to slap the hand away. "Gerroff! And you wonder why I never grow! You and that damn what's-her-face are always putting pressure on meee and it's keeping me short!"

Ciel blinked, trying to place the strange girl while she argued rather colorfully with the mortician man. He knew he saw her somewhere, but he wasn't exactly sure where. All in all, he ought to remember- after all, such manly clothing would be a trademark of hers, he was certain.

Bang.

A familiar redhead threw open the abused door to the morgue cheerfully, clutching various packages, her pinz-nez wobbling dangerously on the very tip of her nose. She wore a long red coat that went to her knees and looked the color of blood. Underneath it the demon wore a white dress shirt with the same white jabot, a black vest with red lined pockets, black trousers, white socks that went to her knees and brown heels with iron buckles.

"Undertaker, do you- Oh, Hello Milady." The demoness grinned happily as she spotted her irate young charge.

"Blaze! Where the fucks have you been? And why did you leave me behind AGAIN?" she demanded, and Blaze shrugged. "Sorry, milady. I went to China."

Stone silence echoed throughout the shop, and Mirror was fairly sure she saw a giant dust bunny roll past them.

Mirror slapped her head. "Blaze…I know I mused how it would taste to eat alligator a few days ago, but this is getting annoying."

Blaze grinned even wider. " Meh, I must do what I must do to please milady."

Mirror snorted. " Blaze, you like tormenting me. Between pleasing me and tormenting me, there is a teapot's worth of difference."

Blaze opened her mouth to retort, but she was cut off.

"Who are you?" Ciel asked, getting faintly annoyed with the strange duo.

Mirror's eyes widened. "HOLY SHIT ON FIRE. THE PEDOBEAR JUST STRUCK GOLD. SOMEBODAH GET THE RIFLE." Blaze slapped Mirror across the face and the girl shook her head and smiled at Ciel. "Oh, hello. Let's see, I do believe you are the Phantomhive guy who manufactures all those sweets I like! - And you're also the one who Blaze buys toys from- all to torment me, of course. I'd say that it was nice to meet you, but it's not. And probably won't be. Ever. And by the way, I'm uh...uh...uh. Fuck! Blaze, what's my name again?" Mirror tapped her lip thoughtfully with one of her rather long fingers while her lovely demon servant rolled her eyes.

"Thorned Blackheart."

"Why do I have such a lame name again?"

"I'm not your mother."

"Why don't you love me Mommy? All I've ever done is love and cherish you! Was I not quiet enough last night, did I make your lunch wrong? Why don't you love me!" Mirror proclaimed dramatically, provoking an eye-roll from the demoness.

"Oh, fuck you."

Mirror grabbed a random hand from one of the dead people's bodies and slapped her with it. " Don't give me those images! It's horrifying!"

Blaze simply responded with throwing a jar containing a pair of eyes at the petite girl, who caught it- if a bit precariously.

" Don't destroy my shop, you two~"

The two whipped their heads his way. " Fuck you."

" Ahem." Ciel coughed, getting the trio's attention. " As I was about to say, what happened to the bodies that you have received from jack the ripper?"

" Ah~ well you see, they all have a uterus removed…"

" But wouldn't that be hard to do?"

"Actually no." Blaze accentuated cheerfully, clasping her protesting young charge in her arms. "You simply cut open the throat and destroy the voice box so she does not scream and alert others of your presence…" she ran a finger across Mirror's throat "…lalala…and remove the womb from the female victim. Any medical student could easily accomplish this with the right training so your criminal is someone (or perhaps something?) who has experience in the field of Medicine. This could limit down your lists of subjects quite easily. But then again there are several ways to remove a uterus. Easily with the way I just described which was a Hysterectomy or with the ways of witchcraft, cult techniques or black magic."

"Simple for you, you're better at that sort of shit." Mirror mumbled, squirming in the elder woman's grip. "Now let me go, or I'm going to kick your ass so hard that you won't feel it when you're next shagged."

"As if you could," Blaze said amusedly, but let the girl go.

After a moment of exasperation and eye-rolling at her servant, the petite girl apparently remembered something; Mirror grinned predatorily, her almost shark-like grin already settling nicely in place as she spoke to the closest thing she had to family outside of blaze as far she knew- namely, the undertaker.

"So Fluffy, You got those special lollipops for me or what?" She asked eagerly, her suddenly shining, childlike eyes at a clash with her rather disturbing smile. However, the Undertaker appeared to be used to this sort of expression and so chuckled, tapping a long, blackened nail against his bottom lip.

"Ahh~ yes, I do." The undertaker fished out three rather large lollipops out of his sleeve to give to the girl happily, where she clutched the unnaturally blood-red sweets to her chest blissfully.

"…What are those?" The lady in red by Blaze asked cautiously, and Mirror turned a pair of mismatched eyes on her.

There was a moment of silence in which the white-haired girl registered the woman's presence.

"GAH!" With surprising agility, Mirror vaulted over a rather large coffin, which served as one of the Undertaker's sleeping homes, and hid behind it, her eyes wide and startled as she watched the confused female in red. "Blaze! How come you had a FEMALE counterpart that wears such horrid perfume and didn't tell me? Seriously, what the fuck?" she demanded, ignoring the stares coming from most of the people in the Morgue.

Blaze sent a cool look at the shaking girl and shook her head, her defiant curl bobbing along with her as she did so. "No, I don't. One, she would both have to be Male and like the same clothing she does now, which would make her a cross dresser, if not a transsexual. My clothes now are specially made for that of a female of my proportionate size and she is no where near my actual size for that throws out your theory.

Mirror sent her a strange look. "Uh, Blaze…you ARE a cross dresser."

"No I am not goddamnit! Me dressing up as a male prostitute to break into that chocolate factory to get you your sweets does not automatically make me a cross dresser and what does that have to do with anything?"

"The fact that you don't let ME wear anything remotely related to friggin' trousers." The white haired- duchess deadpanned.

"Ahem, I believe madam red was asking what those sweets were for?" Sebastian asked, growing tired of the antics of the three. Honestly, that girl was much more trouble than he thought she originally was, and in all honesty, he wasn't sure how she would be seen as dangerous to the queen.

Ignorant of another demon's mental rant, Mirror blinked and held one up innocently. " Oh, these? Well, I just like blood-flavored lollipops. No one else supplies me with them, actually no one is dumb enough and-or brave enough to sell them to me on the other hand. So when I run severely low, I pick up my skirts, highjack the carriage and go to Sir Fluffaluffagus!"

"What do you do with those sweets?" Ciel asked hesitantly, almost afraid of the answer.

" Eh, one quarter goes to me, another quarter goes to Erin, and my house of thingseats the rest. Speaking of my bat shit house…" She slid a narrowed-eyed look at Ciel. "It's been decided: My house hates you. It hates you as much as I hate the French, which is a lot considering I'm a true proper English Gentleman. I'll bet 10 pounds that it'll go nomnomnom on your face if you ever happen to visit me."

"…I haven't been to your house! I just met you! And how could a house eat my face?"

The strange duo exchanged looks and the two of them looked at the Undertaker who shuttered. "You don't want to know, little Earl... You really, really don't want to know." He shivered again. "The Blackheart House is very…strange. I still have my nightmares from when I stayed over the one night…Say Mirror, do you still have to walk backwards to get into the kitchen?"

"Hahaha!" The girl laughed, shaking her head. "Only on Tuesdays though."

An incredulous look spread across the young noble's features before settling into determination. " Very well. Expect a call on your house in the near future. I currently have a case going on at the moment so I cannot make a current visit to your so-called 'House of Horrors'." It was obvious Ciel didn't believe that Mirror's house was alive and possibly hated him. "Come now, Sebastian, we have gained much information."

Almost with a sprinkling a magical sparks, the group of people had left the trio of strange people. Quite fast too for people of the human race….Mirror merely shrugged; not bothering to think about it for much longer. They probably couldn't handle her awesomeness.

Mirror stared out at the door that they had left in for a long moment.

" Mirror, dearest~?" the Undertaker asked, sounding as if he was choking back a giggle as he attempted to ask in a faux concern for his little duchess.

At the sudden sentence that had apparently pierced her thoughts, it seemed like a cue for insanity; for Mirror and her demon broke down unanimously in hysterical laughter, only the smaller of the two had the strange ring of insanity within her delighted expressing of her feelings.

"My, my…won't you come into my parlor, said the spider to the fly…" Mirror said in a momentary wry tone before bursting out into hysterical laughter once more.

This time, the man let a Cheshire-worthy smile stretch across his features before letting out a loud, cackling laugh.

Irony was delicious.

And the duchess didn't even have to try to lure him into a trap of any sort… He placed himself in the spider's web.

And oh, what a lovely web it was.

way