How To Piss Off Your Girlfriend

7) Forget Things You Shouldn't Forget

Alvin sat lazily on the couch. It had been strangely quiet that morning so he was taking advantage of it while he could. He rested his feet on the table in front of him and leaned into the couch, letting out a content, "Aah…" Just as he had reached maximum relaxation the TV went off. "What the…" He looked around for the remote in a small panic.

"Ahem,"

He looked behind him to see the remote in the hands of his girlfriend who looked at him expectantly. "Thanks, babe." He smiled and grabbed for the remote. She pulled back the item. "What?" Brittany glared at him. "Oh, okay; I get it." Alvin smirked and stood. He pulled her into a kiss and smiled. "I love you."

Brittany raised her brow. "And…?"

"And…" Alvin shifted his eyes. "Good morning?"

Brittany scoffed and thrust the remote into his chest as she stomped down the hall to their bedroom. Alvin chuckled at the sound of the door slamming shut. Looking over both of his shoulders to make sure he wasn't being watched, he grabbed the phone and dialed a familiar number. "Hello?" A small voice answered after a few rings.

"Ellie, it's me." Alvin whispered.

"…And who is me?"

"Ellie…" Alvin rolled his eyes.

She giggled. "Sorry," Alvin continued to look over his shoulder as the movements coming from the bedroom became apparent. "So, today's the big day, huh? Are you nervous?"

He chuckled. "A little," He began pacing. "I was just calling to…" He tensed when the bedroom door opened and Brittany emerged. "…To- to make sure that, uh, the guitar is in its case."

Brittany raised her brow curiously at the way he was acting. "Alvin, what the hell are you talking about?" Eleanor said.

Alvin chuckled nervously when Brittany stopped short of her destination to the door to listen to the conversation. "You know, my very special and expensive guitar that I need for tonight." He tried his best to stress his words so Eleanor would understand.

She paused and he could hear shuffling coming from her end. He turned around and quickly gave Brittany the "this person is crazy" look. She nodded but stayed in place. "Alvin, there's nothing in this plan about a guitar."

"Well, check again."

Eleanor took another pause and then gasped. "Oh! Brittany is in the room with you!" She giggled at her obliviousness of the situation.

"Yes, so, is it there?" Alvin asked again.

"Yes, it's safe and sound." Eleanor said cheerfully after checking if Alvin's surprise for Brittany was still in the box.

He relaxed a bit and smiled. "Great, be sure to have it here by seven." He instructed before hanging up. He turned and was met with a suspicious look from his girlfriend. He jumped a bit, having almost forgotten she was there.

"What do you need your guitar for tonight?" Brittany asked, crossing her arms over her chest.

"I'm going to the park with Simon and Theodore." He shrugged. "There's going to be a show there and we wanted to check out some of the local talent."

Brittany's shoulders slumped slightly. "Oh," She turned and grabbed her purse. "Well, I'm going to head to work." Alvin nodded and plopped back onto the couch. "Is there anything you want to say to me before I leave?" She asked hopefully.

"I already told you I love you." He said returning to his relaxing position.

Brittany took a few steps toward the door so that she was now beside the couch. "Is there anything you want to give me?" She smiled.

Alvin thought. "Nope," He grabbed the remote and turned up the volume of the TV. Brittany's smile faded as she sighed. She adjusted her bag on her shoulder and headed out the door. When the door shut Alvin's mischievous smirk reappeared. "Not until tonight…"

Alvin blew out a breath as he adjusted and readjusted his tie. He had never been this nervous about anything in his life. With his nerves in a twist the sound of his phone vibrating against the counter was enough to send him into a mini-heart attack. He calmed down, realizing it was only his phone and answered it. "Ellie, where are you?" He asked harshly. "Tell me you're on your way."

"We have a problem."

Alvin froze. "What did I say?" He groaned and rubbed his forehead. "What's wrong?"

"Oh, nothing; nothing's wrong." Eleanor laughed nervously. "I had your gift on the counter while I was baking and…" She blew out air. "To make a long story short, it might've been baked into a pie."

Alvin relaxed a bit. "That's no problem." He continued adjusting his tux. "Just go through the pie and find it."

Eleanor let out a nervous giggle. "That's the problem." Alvin's movements slowed from the tension in her tone. "I don't know which pie it's in."

Alvin blinked at this response. "El, how many pies did you make?"

"Um…" She did some quick math in he head. "Twenty-five."

"Twenty-five?"

"…Give or take fifty."

Alvin groaned and dropped his head in frustration. "Okay, Brittany isn't going to be home for a while. I'll come over there and help you look." He hurriedly moved toward the door and ran to his car.

"I can't believe this." Alvin muttered. They were both covered in a variety of pie- as was Eleanor's kitchen. "We looked through every single pie and still didn't find it." He picked up and threw down another glob of dessert.

"I don't understand where it could've gone." Mid-sigh, Eleanor gasped at the shiny object in a pile of gook. "There! There! I see it!" She began a slipping as she attempted to run to it.

Alvin gasped and did the same. His stride was cut short when Eleanor's front door opened and Brittany walked through it. "Ellie, I'm depressed." She looked up just in time to see Alvin slip and take Eleanor down with him on his way to the floor. "What is going on here?" Brittany screeched.

"Brittany," Eleanor groaned and struggled to move from under Alvin but they were both still slipping and sliding in the goop that covered the kitchen. She finally got some sort of grip on the counter and pushed herself to her feet. She laughed as she approached her confused and suspicious sister. "This looks weird, right?" She chuckled.

Brittany nodded. "Who wouldn't find it strange that their boyfriend is in a tux, rolling around in pie with his ex-girlfriend on tonight of all nights?"

Alvin finally made it to his feet. "Brittany, I can explain."

"Please do!" She exclaimed.

Alvin began chuckling nervously. "Well, you see, I was…uh…" Eleanor shifted her eyes nervously as Alvin stammered under Brittany's intense glare of skepticism. He began moving his hand over the counter as he took a step toward her. His fingers then brushed up against something rigid in the soft goop. He whipped his head around and hurriedly dug through it until he saw it. "Oh my gosh; I found it!" He exclaimed pulling the item up like a child finding a toy in a cereal box. Eleanor smiled excitedly while Brittany was more confused than ever.

Alvin continued to chuckle nervously as he approached her. "I, uh…" He scratched the back of his neck anxiously as he stood in front of Brittany he grabbed her hands. "This isn't exactly how I wanted to do it, but…"

"Alvin, what are you talking about?"

Alvin chuckled again. "You didn't think I had actually forgotten, did you?" Brittany gasped as he got on one knee. "I'd have to be a complete idiot to forget the day the most beautiful girl in the world stepped back into my life…and I don't want to lose her again," He slipped the ring onto her finger. "Brittany, will you marry me?"

Unable to speak, Brittany smiled through her tears and nodded. Alvin grinned also. He stood to his feet and pulled her into a long kiss.

"Aw," Eleanor cooed.

I'm thinking one more chapter… but we'll see won't we…

This actually might be the last one. *shrug* Tell me...

1) Don't pick up your clothes
2) Hog the bed
3) Don't put the toilet seat down
4) Hang out with you ex
5) Keep secrets
6) Withhold information
7) Forget things you shouldn't forget

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