Disclaimer: I do not own the 'Glee' world.

So, things are a bit busy for me at the moment and I'm missing my Glee-fanfic high. This was already written so I thought I'd publish the first bit for you.

This is set post Episode 113 but before 114. So it's not compatible with the back nine.

It's kind of a weird plot, but the idea came to me just as I was getting into bed and I couldn't not write it…

Noah Puckerman Vs Mr. Mistoffelees

Prologue

Noah Puckerman had always thought that cats were evil. In all the cartoons and movies he'd watched as a kid, the dogs or mice had been good and the cats had always been fucking evil little bastards.

As far as he could tell it was true in real life too.

If he walked past a cat in the street it would hiss at him or sit there and judge him as it lazed around in the sunshine. Their eyes, their twitching tails and their claws just gave off an evil vibe.

Now, he knew that some animals needed to kill other animals – it was the way the world worked and he wasn't squeamish or any of that shit. Dogs killing rabbits? Fine, whatever. But when a cat spotted a bird, or a mouse, or some other little animal, then they wouldn't just kill it; they'd fucking torture it. Like, they'd let the mouse scurry away for a second and just pounce on it again. And then, when the creature was finally dead, they'd just leave it. They wouldn't eat it or shit. It was all just some cruel little game.

So, yeah, cats were evil. It was a fact.

But Puck was sure that Rachel Berry's cat? Was fucking Satan.