"Merlin," Arthur said in the most menacing tone he could muster. "I'll have you in the stocks for this."

Merlin's head snapped up, causing the crown - Arthur's crown, of all things - to slip down a bit so that it now rested at a jaunty angle. "But it wasn't my fault," he said, slurring his words slightly as he forced himself to his feet, knocking over his chair in the process. He wobbled for a moment before he suddenly pitched forward in a mess of knees and elbows. Arthur caught him reflexively and didn't immediately let go, both for his safety and Merlin's.

"It was the laundry," Merlin mumbled into Arthur's shoulder. "The laundry's fault."

"The laundry got you drunk?" Arthur repeated dubiously.

"No," Merlin replied, shifting so that his nose was pressed uncomfortably against Arthur's cheek. "It was Gwen!"

"Gwen?" Arthur found it difficult to believe that Gwen, of all people, could manage to get Merlin this drunk. Actually, he found it utterly impossible to imagine. But when he turned to look at Gwen she stared back at him wide-eyed and unblinking over the edge of an enormous goblet.

"He promised to sing us sea shanties," she said, shrugging apologetically. She then took a swig of her drink, hiccupped loudly, and set about refilling her goblet.

Merlin began humming to himself, apparently in preparation of beginning one of his promised songs, but the sound was soon eclipsed by the most terrifying noise Arthur had ever heard: the sound of Morgana giggling.

"It's your own fault, Arthur," she said, still grinning as she tottered over to him on unsteady legs. "You shouldn't have sent Merlin to work outdoors during this terrible storm."

"I only sent him to the armoury," Arthur protested. "Merlin is a servant, he has duties to attend to. Unlike some people," he added, giving her a pointed look. Morgana merely gave him a dismissive sniff.

"He came back to the castle completely drenched and chilled to the bone," she said, eyeing Arthur in clear disapproval.

"He seems pretty dry now," Arthur said grimly. He should know, because Merlin's very warm and very dry limbs were currently wrapped around him. Arthur was, however, entirely conscious of the fact that something wet and no doubt disgusting was dripping down the side of his neck. If Merlin was drooling on him, he would be in the stocks for the next year.

"I found him in the laundry room trying to dry himself off," Gwen piped up, and now she was glaring at Arthur in displeasure too. "He was shivering. I had to find him new clothes to wear."

Arthur quailed slightly under her stern gaze but he told himself that he didn't feel guilty for sending Merlin out in this weather, not at all, not even as the thunder rumbled overhead and a flash of lightning revealed the trees whipping from side to side in the wind.

"Did these new clothes include my crown?" he demanded, trying his best to sound indignant in hopes of making the girls forget their mutual disapproval.

Gwen and Morgana looked away, hiding their smirks as Merlin replied, "No, that's part of the drinking game!"

Arthur narrowed his eyes. "What drinking game?"

"Whoever is wearing the crown has to say something that they never did," Merlin whispered loud enough that Arthur could have heard him across the room if he had needed to. "And if anyone has done it, they have to drink!"

"Tell me, Merlin, did you happen to do most of the things that Morgana and Gwen said?" he asked, giving the girls a shrewd look. They both had the grace to look embarrassed.

"How did you guess?" Merlin asked, sounding surprised. "Gwen said that's because I'm from Ealdor and things are different in Camelot." Still clinging to Arthur he leaned back far enough to give him a sweet but sloppy grin.

"Interesting," Arthur said. He plucked the crown from Merlin's hair and set it on his own head. "I think I'd like to play this game too."

"Oh no you don't," Morgana said, making a grab for the crown. "You'll have to wait your turn like everyone else, Arthur." She placed the crown on her own head and returned to her seat next to Gwen, waiting patiently as Arthur clumsily deposited Merlin in his now-righted chair before taking the last seat at the table.

Gwen poured Arthur a goblet of wine as Morgana contemplated him thoughtfully. At last she gave him a mischievous smile and said, "I've never seen a unicorn."

"I have!" Merlin exclaimed and eagerly took a large gulp from his goblet.

Arthur sighed and took a more modest sip. He had a feeling that this was going to be a very long night.