Luke piloted the speeder while Leia sat tensely next to him, letting the woman lead the way to where she hoped to see her husband alive. Leia had so many questions for this woman, but she found her jaw clenched too tightly in anxiousness to ask more than her name.
Nesla. Leia had never heard Han mention her before, although that wasn't surprising, still unsure how she felt about Han's old friend. On one hand she felt sorry for her, knowing that she was only a victim of her past that had led her to her current situation. On the other hand, there was the very real possibility that she had killed Han. And that, Leia would find completely unforgivable.
Luke had flown as fast as possible and when Nesla finally told them they had arrived at their destination. Leia hadn't even realized that her fists were clenched so tightly that one of her fingernails had dug into her skin and drawn blood.
There was not a soul in sight in the darkened alley they had stopped at, and Nesla led them down a series of narrow passageways, each hall becoming darker than the last. It was no wonder Leia hadn't seen any recordings of this place. It didn't seem likely that anyone had been down there recently - except of course for this woman and Han.
Finally, Nesla stopped and pointed to a large, metal door in the duracrete, sealed with a valve. "There," she said simply.
Not wanting to waste any more time, Leia nodded to her brother. "Luke?"
Knowing exactly what she wanted, Luke ignited the green blade of his lightsaber, cut easily through the door frame and pushed it open.
The dim light from outside illuminated the form of her husband, his back facing them, lying perfectly still on his side with his arms bound behind him.
Rushing to him, Leia dropped to her knees and rolled him onto his back after Luke released the binders that held his wrists and returned to stand silently with Nesla.
Leia placed a hand on either side of his stubble-covered cheeks, like ice to the touch. His blue lips were parted slightly, and there was no response from him as she cradled his head in her lap and stroked his forehead.
"Han, wake up, please?" She gave his cheek a few gentle slaps, then leaned her face down against his mouth to see if he was breathing. Feeling only the faintest hint of cold air escape his lips, she leaned down, pressing her lips to his and exhaled long and hard.
"Come on, Han. Don't do this to us. I need you to come back to me, Han. I can't raise those kids without you."
Leia held Han close, wrapping her arms around his upper body and hoping to provide some warmth as she gently rocked him. In all the times she'd ever held him, he'd never felt so cold and lifeless.
She pulled his head close to hers and whispered softly in his ear as she rubbed her hands along his back. "I love you so much, Han. I don't want to have to live without you. Come back to me."
Suddenly, there was a faint cough and a gasp for air, and the previously lifeless body was now shaking violently in Leia's arms before she saw his hazel eyes connect with hers.
"Oh, gods, Han," she said brushing her fingers along his icy forehead. "I thought I'd lost you."
His voice was only a whisper through chattering teeth. "Y-y-you c-c-came for m-me."
Leia almost started laughing through her tears. "Of course I came for you, Han. I love you too much to let you go."
He blinked slowly. "I'm s-s-sorry."
She smiled at him again. "No, I'm the one who should be sorry. I'm going to make sure I never give you a reason to walk out on me like that again."
His only response was to curl up closer to her much warmer body, turning his face toward her stomach and pulling his legs up behind her while he wrapped trembling arms around her back for comfort as well as body heat.
Leia squeezed him back, only just realizing how cold it was in the room, and wondering how Han had survived for so long.
"Thank you for holding on for me, Han," she whispered quietly in his ear. "I'm sorry I made you wait so long."
As she held him close, she realized that she could not yet be content just that Han had been found. She turned to her brother. "Luke, help me get him out of here. We've got to warm him up quickly."
Luke knelt down and helped Leia ease Han to his feet, each supporting one side of him. Once they were standing, Leia turned to Nesla, still standing silently in the doorway with a look of deep remorse in her eyes.
Leia turned to her as they walked past and said, "Thank you for giving him another chance. But you're going to have to come with us. We can't just let you go."
Nesla nodded slowly. "I understand."
Just by the look in Han's eyes Leia could tell he was confused by this exchange, but he never said a word, only shakily got into the speeder with the rest of them as they headed for the nearest medical facility.
Leia held Han close, trying to warm him up as best she could. His shaking had not subsided, and he was unable to speak. Leia tried to get him to drink some water, but he couldn't get it down.
"Luke you have to hurry."
"I'm going as fast as I can, Leia."
Nothing could be fast enough for her at that point. She feared that her husband was dying in her arms and there was nothing she could do about it – and it was her fault.
After what seemed like an eternity, they arrived at the med center. Luke had called ahead and a stretcher was waiting to take him in. Leia reluctantly released the grip she had on Han and let the doctors take him away, nearly not trusting to leave him in the care of anyone else.
Luke came up beside her and put an arm around her, sensing her reluctance to let them take him away. "It'll be all right, Leia. Let them do their job. He'll be just fine."
Leia let him go and heaved a sigh of relief, knowing she had done all that she could. We found him. He's going to be ok.
Almost having forgotten she existed, Leia turned to the woman still sitting in the speeder, silent and staring at the floor. Leia didn't know whether to be grateful that she had shown them where Han was or if she should kill her for putting him in that position.
Leia walked up to the open window and spoke calmly. "I hope you realize that we're going to have to contact the authorities over this."
Nesla didn't even look up. "I understand."
"I know that you saved his life just now, and I can't thank you enough for that. But if it weren't for what you did then he wouldn't have needed saving in the first place."
The woman looked up at Leia. "I know that I've made some terrible decisions in my life, and this was probably the worst of them. It's just that I was so caught up in this idea of revenge that I'd had in my head since I was 14 years old, I guess I never realized who I might be hurting, or that I'd be doing the same thing to someone else as those Imperials did to me when I was a kid. I know now that it wasn't Han's fault. I guess I just couldn't see it before. I wanted to be able to take out my anger on someone. I really am sorry, you know. You married a good man. Even though it was only for a short time, he was the best friend I ever had."
Mine, too. Leia thought to herself. Her heart swelled when she was reminded that he would be her best friend for the rest of her life. Leia took pity on this woman she so recently thought of as a cold-hearted killer. "You're going to have to face the consequences of what you've done – I can't just let that slide – but after that, I am sure that Han and I can help you make a better life for yourself. Assuming Han doesn't mind, and I don't think he will."
Nesla's eyes spilled over with tears. "Thank you. I'd like that." Nesla sniffled and wiped her face before speaking again. "Just tell me something, is he still a smart-ass?"
Leia couldn't hold back the laughter. "Why do you ask?"
"I swear I didn't think he'd make it to his 12th birthday considering the way he liked mouthing off to superiors. And in our situation that usually got you quite a beating."
Leia felt a pang inside at the thought of her husband getting beaten as a child. She had known he had it rough, but he never went into much detail. She thought of Jacen, Jaina and Anakin and wondered how anyone could ever even consider hurting a child. Sometimes you have to remember that there are a lot of terrible things out there in the Universe, which is why you can't take for granted all of the wonderful things you've got.
Leia had left Luke to wait with Nesla for the authorities to arrive while she went inside and watched from behind the glass as Han spent some time warming in a bacta tank. The doctors had assured her that he was going to be perfectly fine, and once he was warmed up and rehydrated she could take him home, where he belonged.
She was going to make sure that they went back to having the kind of relationship they used to have. Surely they could still make time for each other while they cared for their children. She didn't want to wait until she got him home to say what she needed to say before they restarted the rest of their lives.
Slowly, she entered his room to find him bare-chested, lying on his back with the bed covers pulled up to his waist. The readout on the nearby screen showed that his heart was beating strong and steady. She couldn't imagine what it would've felt like had she been just a little bit too late in finding him.
She watched his chest rise and fall for a moment, then saw his head roll to the side and his beautiful, hazel eyes looked at her. He merely smiled, and she smiled back.
"Almost time to get up, sleepyhead," Leia said, mimicking Jacen's favorite way to get them out of bed.
"Good, I'd say I'm ready to go home," he spoke quietly and licked his dry lips. "If it's ok with you, that is."
Leia choked out a breath and went to sit on his bed, taking his hand in both of hers, relieved to find how warm it now was. "Of course it's ok with me, Han. I'm so sorry about what happened. I'm sorry I didn't really listen to what you were saying. I guess I just didn't realize how badly I've been ignoring you lately."
He reached a hand up and cupped her cheek. "It's all right, sweetheart. You were right, I was being selfish."
She let out an exasperated sigh and looked at the ceiling before continuing. "That's just the thing. You weren't being selfish at all. You were right."
Han craned his head and looked at her skeptically. "I'm sorry, what was that? I couldn't quite hear you."
"Will you shut up and let me apologize? You were right about us not spending enough time together. I guess I just forgot how important it is that we always make time for each other, no matter how busy we are. It's just like when you first started trying to pursue me, only this time instead of being wrapped up in war, I was wrapped up in kids."
"So just so we're clear, you're saying I was right?"
"Not about everything. You were wrong when you said we don't need you. Not having you there, even for just a few days, you have no idea how much I missed you. How much we missed you."
"I've been gone for a few days before."
"Sure, but this time I wasn't sure if you were going to come back. I thought you'd left us, and all I could think about was what it would be like without you. I'm so sorry I took you for granted."
"Leia, sweetheart, I would never, ever leave you. I'm sorry that I walked out on you. I never meant to be gone for that long. And seeing Nesla again, and knowing how young I was when I got caught up with Shrike, and thinking about our kids… well, I guess I just forgot how lucky I was and how nothing is worth messing any of that up. Even if maybe you don't feel the same way about me."
"I still feel the same way about you, Han. I still love you more than anything… except for maybe those three little darlings we have back at home."
Han shrugged his shoulders and smiled. "Of course."
"I love you so much. But don't you dare ever accuse me of not caring anymore, you got that? I don't want you to ever doubt me."
"Sweetheart, if you don't want me to doubt you, you have to make sure to give me a good reason not to."
"I'll give you plenty of good reasons." She leaned down and kissed him, gently at first. Then she felt his hands slide up her neck and hold her face to his as he deepened the kiss, and she found herself becoming lost in his desire and the feel of his now-warm lips against hers. He hadn't kissed her like that in a long time, and she was very quickly reminded of what she had been missing out on.
She was startled by the sound of a female voice behind her. "His IV is done. As soon as I take it out, he can go home."
Their lips parted and they stared into each other's eyes. "What do you say, princess? Can we continue this in private at home?"
"I wouldn't want it any other way. There's a few other things we have to make up for lost time on."
"Wow, I guess you really must've missed me then, huh?"
"Of course I did. I'm sorry I didn't realize how I'd been treating you. Don't let me get preoccupied anymore, ok?"
"You know what's funny about this whole thing?" Han said. "We decided to make sure we were spending more time together and not going away as much. Now I'm home all the time and you just liked to pretend I wasn't there."
"I did not! Will you – " she stopped speaking when she saw the grin spread across his face and realized he'd been teasing her, even if there had been a hint of truth at his words.
She turned to the nurse behind her. "Go ahead and take his IV out. It's time for me to get my husband home."
"Daddy!" The three Solo children nearly tackled their father as he walked through the door with Leia. He squatted down and wrapped all three of them in an embrace, kissing each of their foreheads.
"I missed you guys."
Anakin looked up at his father. "I knew you were coming home, Daddy. I knew Mommy found you and made you warm and safe."
Han looked up at his wife and smiled. "She always does."
He kissed each of them again and then rose to his feet to give Leia a quick kiss.
"Ewww!" The three children squealed in mock-horror.
"Get used to it, guys," Han said before winking at his wife.
"I've got a great idea," Leia said. "How about you three go put on your pajamas and Daddy will come read you a bedtime story. Sound good?"
"Yeah!" The three young Solos yelled before running off toward their bedroom.
Leia pulled Han's face to hers and kissed him again, suddenly unable to get enough. She was only far too aware of how close she'd come to losing her husband, and him not knowing how much she still loved him. "You know, while you were gone they complained that I didn't do the voices in their stories as well as you do. They missed you, Han."
"Well, I missed them, too. And it's good to see they're glad to have me back."
"Of course they are. They need their father, Han. I know you might not see it every day, and I know you don't have the Force, but they still need you and love you more than anything. And so do I."
"Don't you forget it," Han said, leaning down and kissing her deeply.
"We're ready for our story, Daddy!" Jaina yelled from her room.
Han slowly pulled away and looked deep into his wife's brown eyes. "Hold that thought, ok?"
"I think I can do that."
Leia let Han go to the children while she went to their bedroom.
After waiting roughly 30 minutes with no sign of her husband, Leia decided to go check and make sure the children hadn't convinced him to read them story upon story and he didn't have the heart to turn them down and come to bed.
She tiptoed down the hallway and peeked around the doorway to find that all three children were fast asleep, as was her husband, lying on his back on Anakin's bed with his youngest son lying in the crook of Han's arm. It was moments like those that reminded her how lucky she was and how much she loved her family.
She was debating whether or not she should wake Han up, when she saw his eyes flutter before he looked up at her and smiled. She beamed back at him. He brought a hand to his lips and mouthed, "Shhh…." Before carefully disentangling himself from underneath Anakin and padding out of the room, grasping Leia's hand when he reached her and leading her towards their bedroom.
Once inside with the door closed, she turned to him, brought her hands up to his face and kissed him. He kissed back with equal fervor, releasing weeks of frustration and worry. "You sure you're not too tired?" Leia asked.
"That's the difference between you and me, Leia. I'm never too tired for this."
"Well, I promise I never will be again either. As long as you make sure it's worth it."
"Oh, it'll be worth it. Don't you remember? I know it's been a while, but it hasn't been that long."
She smiled at him. "No, I'd never forget."
She felt his hands slip underneath the back of her nightgown. "Now, sweetheart, I don't think I've quite finished getting warmed up yet."
"By all means, let me help you with that."
He smiled and leaned in to kiss her neck as her head fell back.
They made love slowly, as though they wanted the night to last forever. Leia had forgotten how much she enjoyed the way Han made her feel, like she was the only woman in the galaxy and everything he did was just for her. She had forgotten how wonderful it felt to feel so loved and desired and did everything she could to make sure he felt the same way.
Hours later, Han's body was pressed up against Leia's back as he held her close and whispered in her ear, "Thanks for warming me up."
"My pleasure," Leia replied, feeling completely content to lie there in his arms.
He kissed the spot behind her ear and she shivered before he squeezed her tighter. "Wasn't too bad for me, either. I missed you, Leia. I missed this."
"So did I, Han. I just didn't realize how much until now. Does this mean you forgive me?"
She turned her head to look at his face only inches away from hers as he looked down at her. "Of course I forgive you. But that doesn't mean that I'm not going to give you every opportunity to continue to make it up to me," he said as one of his hands slid down to cup her breast.
"Tomorrow," he said before he kissed her earlobe, "and the next night," he paused again as his lips moved lower on her neck. "And the night after that…"
"Mmmm…" Leia said as she reveled in the warmth of his touch. "I suppose it's a punishment I can live with."
She turned in his arms to face him and stroked his cheek. "Sometimes I wonder what I ever did to deserve you."
He smiled at her. "I was just thinking the same thing about you. Thanks for finding me."
"I'm just sorry I took so long."
He whispered quietly in her ear. "I love you," before settling his head against the pillow and shutting his eyes.
"I love you, Han."
She shut her eyes and drifted toward sleep, all the while thinking about how she would never again take Han's love for granted and that she needed him as much as he needed her. And she silently vowed never to forget it again.
A/N - Thus ends my experiment with creating a rift in the Han and Leia relationship. Rest assured that I will be going back to my old ways after this. Please take the time to review if you enjoyed this, even if it's only a sentence it is greatly appreciated and will likely spur more inspiration to write. Thanks for reading!