I've always been told I was useless, my father used to tell me it all the time. They said I was too quiet and that I need to get out more. But I stayed at home and when dad would come home drunk well I would be the one he took his anger out on.

My family never got along either always fighting at holidays and gatherings. Dad would always show up drunk and remind me that I was useless and a mere waste of air and space. I think that's why mom left. She couldn't take the drinking and cheating anymore.

My mother was really pretty with her long curly blonde hair and heart shaped face. I have her eyes to a mess between purple and blue. Maybe that's why dad hates me so much because I look so much like her. He hates her for leaving him and taking my brother with her. My brother and I we look alike but he's older and tougher than me. When we were little he would tell me not to cry because he would be my hero. But then mom took him away and dad got worse. I would cry after he stopped the beating and the rape and yell at the sky asking why they left me behind. But I knew the reason, Mom didn't have enough money to save me too so she took all and left me behind.

I was 6 when it all started.

It's been 10 years.

------

"MATTHEW WAKE THE FUCK UP I DON'T WANT ANOTHER CALL FROM THAT SCHOOL SAYING YOU WERE LATE GOT IT" My dad screamed down the hall and I jolted awake I didn't want him coming into my room god know what he'd do to me then.

"I'm up dad" I yelled so he knew and he grumbled something so I knew I was safe for now. I walked over to my desk and grabbed a hair tie pulling my shoulder length hair into a tail at the nape of my neck before throwing on a random shirt and sweater hiding the burses that had formed on my arms. Searching through my drawer I found a matching pair of socks and haphazardly put them on before pulling on a pair of black converse.

I grabbed the messenger bag on the side of my bed and threw my homework in before grabbing my mp3 glasses and cell phone off bedside table. I ran down the hall past my dad and out the front door placing my glasses on the bridge of my nose and then the headphones in my ears. Pressing the play button a random song played I didn't care much to figure out which one it was.

The walk to school was silent as ever I didn't have many friends and the ones I did have knew not to meet up with me before class started. They knew about my dad, Ivan in particular was confused about the situation but he lived with his mother a loving caring woman. I liked his mother she reminded me of mine before she left me. I passed over a bridge that I passed everyday noting looked out of place. The water flowing underneath always gave me a sense of freedom and escape. I placed my bag next to my feet and folded my arms on the rail overlooking the water and place my head in top of my arms and I stood there thinking.

What would he do if I never came home?

But it was always a stupid question to ask. He would find me and then drag me home by my hair and the beating would be worse and so would the rape after words. I close my eyes and remember when mother and Al were around while dad went to work. Al and I we would sit in mom's lap and laugh. I have a bear named Kumajiro mom and Al got it for my birthday one year. It's really right now one of the only friends I have.

I push myself away from the rail and head back to school grabbing my bag and pulling out the stuffed polar bear and folding my arms around in.

School came into sight maybe five minutes later and outside the gates was a tall boy with sandy blond hair and a scarf around his neck. Ivan Braginski my perhaps best friend. The Russian waved when he saw me. I smiled and ran up to him my legs screaming at the action. Dad tended to like hitting me in the back of the knees, it stopped me from running away from him.

"Good morning comrade Matevy. How might you be this morning?" He smiled his childish smile and I smiled back.

"I'm doing well this morning. I'm guessing I'm late seeing as there aren't any students out here" Ivan nodded and I sighed. "Well let's head in before they call my dad" I whispered the last part as Ivan nodded and walking in his long strides to reach the door before me. Really why did I have to be so short? Couldn't I be taller or at least a little bit stronger so I could defend myself?

"Um Ivan why don't you go off to class I need to go to the office" I said and Ivan nodded and walked off in silence as I went to opposite direction towards the glass windows of the main office. I pushed through cluster fucks of students blocking the halls and getting pushed myself. Finally reaching the office I walk to the receptionist and wait for her to look up. Of course she doesn't which means I have to get her attention. I clear my throat and scuff my feet. She looks up, she's an old woman with large round glasses and short grey hair that is turning white at the roots. She's wearing a white shirt with an open sweater covering it and tan work pants.

"Yes, how may I help you? She asks adjusting her glasses back up onto the bridge of her nose. I hesitated for a moment. What was I going to say 'don't call my father because if you do he'll beat me and rape me worse than usual' yeah that would go over oh so well. Then I remembered when I pass Mr. Oxenstierna's room every morning he's never there. A lie would save me right.

"Um I was late getting to my first period but I was looking for Mr. Oxenstierna but it seems he wasn't in his room so I went looking for him but have yet to find him. Would it be possible to get me a pass to my class?" I asked as sweetly as I could and the woman smiled.

"Yes of course I'll inform Mr. Oxenstierna that you were searching for him. Your name and homeroom number please." She asked pulling out a small sheet of paper to write a note on and another to write out my pass.

"Matthew Williams C467" I said and she wrote it down in her neat script handing me the pass and placing the note on a small stack of papers to be handed to the quiet history teacher.

I thanked her and turned on my heel, letting out a breath of relief and clutching Kumajiro closer to my chest and smiling at the stuffed bear.

"That was a close one eh kuma?" I giggled and placed all my objects-phone Mp3 ect-besides Kumajiro and the pass, into my bag as I reached the door to my classroom.

"Ah Mr. Williams glad you could join us" Mr. Edlstein said not even looking towards me. I walked up to the music teacher and handed him my pass. He looked it over and nodded before motioning that I was allowed to sit. I took my normal see beside Ivan who smiled at me before returning his attention to the board. I took the chance that no-one was looking at me and checked the burses on my arms and hips. The ones on my wrists weren't as bad as the ones on my arms but the ones on my hips would take some time to heal. Time that they might not have.

I contemplated not going home hiding somewhere. Even calling the cops but where would that leave me. It's not like I'd have some place to go. I wouldn't want to bother Ivan and his mother and sisters. And it's not like I could live on the street. I could go to America where Mom and Al lived. But that took money I didn't have and I doubt I'd be able to find them. But it was decided, I wasn't going back to that hellhole I called a home. I'd have to sneak into the house when dad wasn't home and get my clothes and pack some snacks.

The bell signaling the end of class snapped me from my thoughts. I slung my bag over my shoulder and followed Ivan out of the classroom unconsciously clutching Kumajiro closer than normal. Ivan looked over at me genuine concern in his eyes.

"Comrade Matevy, You look distracted today. Something I can help you with Da?" He asked and I looked at him. Was I being distant? Of course I was I've been thinking all day and the feeling in the pit of my stomach had crept up and the pain settled there. Was it worry or was something bad going to happen?

I shook my head both to answer and to dislodge the horrid thoughts. "No Ivan everything is fine I've just not been sleeping well" I said. My voice is really soft so sometimes Ivan had to strain to hear me. He nodded and we went our separate ways. Music was the only class we both had together until lunch and well that made it harder to concentrate. You see when we were both in the same class if one of us was having a bad day the other would take extra notes and give them to the other at lunch. Today Ivan would give me the notes I missed in music during our lunch period but that didn't mean I was going to be off the hook. Ivan always asked for something in return for the notes nothing humiliating but sometimes I really didn't want to. One time he made me watch his scary baby sister while he and his mother went to the store. The girl is a devil I tell you nearly cut the head off Kumajiro. But that day was nothing compared to one with my father.

I made my way to history and it just so happened I had Mr. Oxenstierna. He was a quiet man from Sweden. When he spoke his English was choppy but it just added to his likeability. Another thing is he was married. Now this might not sound strange a lot of people are married but Mr. Oxenstierna is married to a man. Yes my history teacher is gay. His 'Wife' is named Tino he's from Finland he also has a son he adopted from England named Peter.

The moment I walked into the classroom Mr. Oxenstierna looked at me beckoning me to his desk. I walked over and stood there.

"Y' n'd'd t' s' m'" he asked and I nodded. In truth I really did need to see him.

"I needed to know if I could get an extension on the project that is due I need another day to complete it?" He took a moment to think placing a finger to his hips and looking to the side.

"S'r' 's l'ng 's 'ts f'n'sh'ed" I nodded a thank you and sat in my seat in the far back corner. The thoughts came back as soon as the class had started how was I going to get out? Where would I go? Was I ever going to be safe?

The door to the room slammed open and another late student strode in saying he was sorry and how totally unawesome it was of him to be late. He took the only available which happened to be the one next to me. I sighed and went back into my thoughts but was once again disturbed by the student. He poked me on the shoulder and I flinched at the slight contact. I looked at him and I noticed the white hair and crimson red eyes. He had an arrogant air to him and well he was kind of sex….No no you can't think like that.

"Hey kid what page are we on?" he asked and I looked at him confused. Page we were on a page? I shrugged and looked back at my desk. I guess this angered him that or he has some strange fascination with pulling random strands of hair because the moment I turned away he gripped the curl that always hung in front of my face. I lit up like a light bulb and a soft man escaped my lips. I slapped my hands over my mouth and pushed his hand away quickly running out of the room forgetting my bag and Kumajiro but I wasn't going to risk going back in there and have people who never noticed me laughing at me.

I ran into the men's bathroom and to the last stall closing the door and locking it. I couldn't believe he did that. And my reaction I didn't know that was going to happen. Why couldn't he ask the kid next to him or in front of him? I bet they were paying more attention to me.

I spent the rest of that period in that bathroom stall. My face flushed in anger and I guess you could say arousal I mean having that piece of hair grabbed felt really nice I wonder…no no bad Matthew's head bad.

When the bell rang I walked out into the crowed heading back towards my classroom to grab Kumajiro and my bag. That is if they were still there. The bad I didn't care about it was my bear that I wanted most. I know it's strange for a 16 year old boy to be carrying around an old stuffed polar bear but you see the thing went everywhere with me. I treated him like he was a living breathing creature. I talked to him I washed him and when I was younger I even tried to feed him. I giggle slightly at the memory as I near the room. I start to walk in but stop and back out. The student he's still there and he's right next to my bag. He looks hurt like someone said something to him or rejected him. Maybe he asked a girl out and she said no. He lifts the flap on my bag and places a stack of papers in it before picking it up and gently grabbing Kumajiro and walking towards me at the door. I step back and he sees me. The kind look on his face changes to mocking and he shoves my bag and bear into my arms.

"Keseses well well your hormones cooled down enough to come back blondie? Well here's your shit take care of it" he walks off laughing and I look down and place Kumajiro to my cheek. I whisper a thank you to the white haired boy and headed off to P.E with Mr. Zwingli A strict man from Switzerland with a soft spot for his sister.

I hated P.E reason one no matter what we did no-one ever picked me [unless it was hockey] and 2 I fell down a lot and that really wasn't my fault believe me everything can be traced to my dad.

There is a boy in my class his name is Francis Bonnefoy He's French and I sometimes talk to him but he's not a friend. At least I don't think he is. He hangs around with the Spanish kid Antonio.

Antonio is a funny kid he has a crush on Lovino Verags. He has a twin brother named Feliciano I don't think all of his marbles are still there because all he talks about is pasta. Lovino on the other his has some anger problems but then again who wouldn't yell if you were getting molested by Antonio all the time. Oh and the Veragas' are from Italy.

If you haven't noticed I spend a lot of my time analyzing people in my spare time. Most of the time I'm looking around for people to stay away from but it's like a hobby.

Feliciano hangs around a muscular German boy named Ludwig. I know he has a brother but I've never seen them together so I wouldn't know who it is but I know he is friends with Francis and Antonio. Feliks is a flamboyant boy from Poland and he always hangs out with the Baltic brothers Toris, Eduard and Raivis.

I spend the rest of P.E observing everyone and waiting for Lunch and to check my bag to see what the other student had put in it. I'd left Kuma in my bag too.

The bell once again rang and I was the last one in the locker room. Or was I someone pushed past me with a "hurry up" and I jumped. That white haired student I didn't know he was in my P.E class. I instantly grabbed his shirt and he looked back our eyes locked for a moment and I let go.

"Who are you?" I asked and he looked confused and laughed.

"Oh that's a good one kid."He pat my head and smiled and I looked at him still.

"No really who are you?" I asked again and his eyes widened.

"Gilbert Beilschmidt I'm Ludwig's older brother." He said but then smiled and gripped my shirt. "You you're sitting with me and the boys today looks like you need friends" he said and tapped my cheek before turning.

"I…I can't I'm sitting with Ivan and katysua" I said and he waved a hand "Bring them along" he shouted and I looked confused, but nodded knowing he couldn't see.

I grabbed my bag and Kumajiro and headed down to lunch telling Ivan and katysua that we were sitting with Gilbert, Francis and Antonio. They nodded and we walked over to the table Francis was already sitting at. He looked delighted to see us and made quick small talk with Ivan and I smiled.

Ketysua is Ivan's older sister and he's very protective of her. It's almost scary.

Gilbert walked over to the table followed by Antonio dragging a very unhappy looking Lovino. Gilbert took the seat beside me and Antonio took the seat next to Lovino.

"Okay guys this is Matthew. Matthew I think you know everyone right?" Gilbert asked with a smirk on his face. What was he thinking? I nodded in response and clutched Kumajiro closer to me only to have him snagged out of my hands my Antonio.

"What are you doing carrying around a toy? Hey look guys Mattie is a kid" Antonio mocked and I stood up trying to grasp the bear only to fail and tears stung my eyes.

"Give him back Give him back" I yelled tears spilling out of my eyes. If they took Kumajiro away from me then who would I talk to why did he take my bear?

Ivan stood up beside me and glared at him "Give Matevy back Kumajiro" He said angered "Give it back it means a lot to Matevy!" Ketysua added but Antonio stuck his tongue out.

"Make me commies!" yelled Antonio. That's when I thought Ivan was going to explode his eyes went from the normal violet to as red as Gilberts. Ketysua grabbed her brother's arm and told him to calm down.

"Antonio!" the voice rang out and all of us looked and Antonio stopped smiling. Sometime during the whole mess Gilbert had stood up his eyes narrowed at his friend.

"Give Mattie back the bear now" His voice was deep now and Antonio shakily gave me back Kumajiro who I instantly grabbed and nuzzled into. Ivan muttered a thank you and Gilbert nodded in response. "You okay now Mattie?" Gilbert asked and I nod into the fur of my bear. "Tony you ever touch that bear again I'll rip your hands off" Gilbert threatened and Antonio gave a scared nod"

After that lunch went without a hitch…well except for the 'pay back' for the notes. This time wasn't so bad all I had to do was go to Ivan's house and cook him lunch on Saturday. Gilbert had laughed at that. The others talked through lunch but I rested my head on Kuma's fur to try and catch up on some sleep. I hadn't slept in a few days but I wouldn't tell that to Ivan or now Gilbert.

Gilbert, I liked having him around thought I only just met him. He stood up for me to his friend and got Kuma back that I'm thankful for. But I still hadn't checked what he'd put in my bag. I'd check it later right now all I wanted to do was sleep.

Dreams are funny things you know they start out so nice but then they get all twisted and poof you're awake.

I'd started off in field with red flowers I didn't know what they were but I thought they were pretty I was laying there and next to me was my mother and my brother. They were smiling at me and I gripped my mother's hand and smiled too. That's where everything went wrong. Mom and Alfred were gone and my dad was there and instead of being in the meadow I was naked and tied to his bed. This was to me an all too familiar sight. But to have it invade my dreams was bad. I was screaming for him to let me go, to stop. But the pleas fell on deaf ears as he plunged into me.

That's when they woke me up.

I was crying and I guess I'd shouted out in my sleep because on either side of me was Gilbert and Ivan with the rest of the table's occupants staring at me with worried expressions.

"Mattie are you ok? You started shouting in your sleep telling someone to stop" Gilbert took his hand off my shoulder as did Ivan and I nodded placing a fake smile on my face "Yes I'm fine nothing to worry about only a nightmare" I said and excused myself from the table. Only another two periods before I could go get my stuff and get out of that house then maybe the nightmares would stop. I ran to my next period class before anyone could question me.

My other classes went by like nothing until the final bell rang to end the day. I waited for everyone to leave and walked out grasping onto my bear for dear life. I was making a risky diction but it had to be done. As I was leaving the building a car pulled up in front of me it was black with tinted windows. The window rolled down and I saw it was Gilbert driving it.

"Need a ride Matt?" he asked but I shook my head. He sighed and handed me a slip of paper. "Call if you need help" he said and drove off.

I pushed everything to the back of my mind as I walked into the house. Dad wasn't home but I had to be quick to grab everything. Pulling out a suitcase from my closet I stuffed clothes into it emptying all the contents of my drawers and half my closet. I was running out of time Dad would be home any minute and I had to leave.

An engine shutting off a car door slamming shut. Shit he was home. I threw my bag, Kumajiro and the suitcase out the back window and thought of how to escape. Still having my cell in my pocket I ran for the back door and was about to dial Ivan's number when my hair was grasped bulling me back towards my assailant. My dad growled and pulled me towards the one place I never wanted to go.

His room.

"You dumb little shit. How dare you try to leave me, are you gonna be like yer mommy and run off. We'll see if you can run after this." Dad grabbed a knife and pulled off my sweater stabbing the blade into my arm and pulling it down. The blood was pouring out. I was screaming he did the same to the other arm. He was mad really mad.

He finally got tired of the knife and went for the belt leaving bleeding marks all over my back. He loved hitting me I think he always loved hitting me. I was his favorite play thing and I knew what came next. The sound of his zipper coming down and the feel of his hands gripping my jeans were the signs.

"let's get this done quick I have somewhere to go" he gruffed. And in he went. Plunging himself as far as he could go. I screamed and threw my head back tears falling from my eyes and screams ripping themselves from my throat. I cried for him to stop but that made everything worse. He thrust harder and faster until he came.

I felt gross. He pulled out and left me battered bruised and bleeding on his bed. He zipped his pants grabbed his keys and left the house his car speeding down the road. I pulled my pants back on hissing in pain. But I had to reach my phone. I crawled all the way to the small cellular device and flipped it open.

Who was I going to call?

Who would care about me?

'Call if you need help'

That's it Gilbert. I pulled the piece of paper from my pocket and quickly dialed his number and hitting the send key. It only rang twice before he picked up.

"Hello?"

"Gilbert, Gilbert I need help" I cried into the phone.

"Mattie, Mattie is that you? What's wrong?" Gilbert sounded frantic.

"Gilbert my dad..please get here quick" I said trying to stop the tears.

"Where are you Mattie?" I can hear the sounds of keys and a car door slamming shut.

"49 snowhill lane" I whisper trying not to let myself pass out.

"Mattie stay on the line. Do you have Kumajiro?" Why would he ask about Kumajiro? Why?

"No. He's outside with my bags. I didn't want him to see" I sniffled and I heard Gilbert growl.

"Mattie what happened what didn't you want Kumajiro to see?" Another growl I shook my head.

"You'll understand when you get here." Tires squealed down my street.

"I'm coming Mattie" he whispered into the phone and hung up. He parked out in front and walked into the house shouting my name. I whimpered and he came running. I guess he saw the blood first because he'd ripped some fabric from somewhere and tied it around my bleeding arms. I don't know when he took out his phone to call 911 but he did and I think I was grateful for it.

"Mattie, please don't cry You'll be okay soon." I was crying? When did I start crying again?

"Where is Kuma?" he asked and I pointed to the backyard. He ran out and soon came back in holding kumajiro and my bags. He tucked Kumajiro into my arms and sat next to me until the paramedics arrived. Even then he didn't leave. He was still there when I passed out.

"Why did I leave him?" A voice? A female voice? Was she crying? Why?

"Mom it wasn't your fault you didn't know this would happen" Another voice. A man's this time. He was talking to his mother. He sounded worried.

And then there was someone breathing hard. Perhaps from a restless sleep. Where was I?

I thought for a moment not opening my eyes. All the events that happened before I got here flashed through my head and then I remembered.

The hospital.

I opened my eyes and looked around. Gilbert was still there though he was asleep sitting in a chair head resting on the bed. Then I looked up and gasped. In front of me was my mother and brother. They looked at me and Alfred smiled but mom covered her mouth with one hand and reached out with the other placing it on my cheek I gripped it with my hand and closed my eyes. They were here. My family was here.

"Matthew. My little Matthew. I'm sorry I'm so sorry I left you" She whispered into my hair. I couldn't be mad at her. I never was mad at he.

"Mommy I missed you" I whispered back. She smiled and let go. Alfred came over ruffling my hair and handing me Kumajiro before pointing to Gilbert. "Who's he?" he asked and I moved my hand to Gilbert's hair.

"This is Gilbert." I said. At the mention of his name Gilbert's eyes opened and he looked at me.

"Matthew you're alright. See I told you that you'd be okay didn't I?" he said smiling and I laughed nodding. He had told me everything was going to be alright.

I turned to Mom and Al with a questioning gaze. "How did you know where I was?" Mom smiled.

"I got a call from the hospital here saying that my son got brought in with stab wounds and I grabbed the next plane to Canada." Alfred nodded in agreement.

Hours past and mom Al and I talked about things we missed Gilbert just watched.

When mom and Al left I knew it was alright because they weren't leaving me this time. Gilbert stayed the night. He was really worried about me. I guess it's to be expected though"

"Mattie go to sleep the awesome me will get rid of any bad dream you have alright so go to sleep" He was tired too I could tell. His eyes were almost closed but he stayed awake until I was asleep with Kumajiro pulled close to me.

This time my dad wasn't in my dreams. Neither were mom and Al. No it was Gilbert.

He sat against a tree in a pair of camouflage pants and a white tank top. With me sitting between his legs my head against his chest everything was content and peaceful. He kissed me I kissed back everything was perfect.

That is everything would be perfect it that really happened.

"Matt, Mattie wake up" Gilbert? Yeah that was him. The awesome Gilbert.

I opened my eyes and looked at him.

"Mattie, we're going home." He said and I looked at him confused

"Home?" I asked confused and he nodded.

"Yeah Mattie you get to live with the awesome me until your mom and brother find a house here" he said almost giddy. I giggled that's good I liked Gilbert. I felt like I've known him forever.

He helped me up out of bed and told me to go change. I walked to the bathroom and pulled on a white shirt and some black jeans. Gilbert took my hand as soon as I exited pulling lightly trying not to hurt me and pulled me down to his car Kumajiro already waiting in the front seat for me. I smiled and he helped me in. closing the door behind me before running around to the other side. After a half hour of driving I asked him where we were going.

"On a date." He replied and I deadpanned. A date with Gilbert this was just too good to be true.

"B..But I just met you" I yelped and Gilbert Laughed.

"What did you fall on your head or something? We used to hang out at the park when we were younger. I think we were 12 so I've known you for at least six years Mattie and I've liked you that long.

This is when everything went wrong. Or did it make everything better?

Gilbert put his hand on my knee and I freaked out. I hadn't meant to but it flashed back to the rape. Gilbert stopped the car and got out pulling me from my seat on the other side. I tried to push him away but I couldn't do anything with my arms all bandaged up like that.

"Let go please Let go. Don't hurt me please" I was begging and crying and weak. Gil brought my back to his chest kissing the top of my head whispering for me to calm down and asking what was wrong.

I looked back at him and turned in his grip clutching his shirt. "He raped me" I yelled into it and Gilbert gripped me closer his hands turning to fists against my back as I cried into his shirt. He kissed my fore head telling me everything would be alright. We could go home and rest and I could get better. But I didn't want that I wanted to stay like this held close to him.

"Gilbert, can you do something for me?" I said softly sniffling against his shirt. He looked down and smiled gently at me and whispered into my hair.

"Anything Mattie" He whispered and I looked up at him and swallowed hard.

"Touch me?" Gilbert's eyes widened and he grasped me tighter.

"Mattie, I can't do that. As much as I want to I can't you don't know what you're saying. Your father he raped you. I can't Mattie" he whispered to me and I shook my head.

"Please I…I wanna know that it's not supposed to hurt. I wanna know how it feels to be loved "I pleased and Gilbert finally gave in.

"Okay Mattie, when we get home. But you have to tell me when to stop if you get scared" I nodded and we both got in the car and Drove back towards Gilbert's house. We got out and he gripped my shaking hand I wasn't going to back out.

We walked to his room and he closed the door and pulled me in for a kiss our eyes closing as a rhythm was set. Gilberts tongue left no part of my mouth untouched and I reveled in the feeling. I liked it. He had somehow pushed us back towards his bed and was on top of me. I pushed back the thoughts of my father and replaced them with Gilbert right now. His hands lifted my shirt over my head when we pulled away for air. He smirked and seemed to remember something. His hand came up to my hair and he played with the odd curl there electing a moan from me. He smiled and replaced his fingers with his mouth and I got louder. His hands traveled to my chest playing with my nipples and all the attention was making me harder my pants felt confining and I wanted out.

"G..Gil stop teasing please" I moaned arching my back and he chuckled.

"But Mattie, you make such pretty sounds." I blushed bright red and he kissed down my neck and torso until he reached the hem of my pants and unbuttoned them with his mouth and I moaned at the sight. Really it was hot. He pulled off the offensive clothing and rid himself of his shirt all the while admiring my body. He kissed down my abdomen and then I cried out. His mouth had taken all of me in, in one go. I wanted to thrust into the delicious heat but his hand kept me from doing so. He licked the underside of my member and played with the slit. I writhed and moaned and was reduced to nothing but a pile of mush. I was reaching my limit but he finally let go and I groaned.

"Why did you stop?" I asked panting and Gilbert chuckled pulling out a tube of Lube and placing a generous amount on his fingers.

"Well as much as I love the sounds you make I wanna have some fun too" he said and kissed me again. "This will be uncomfortable for a minute but it will get better I promise." I nodded and he slipped a finger into my entrance I winced. Dad had never done this all he did was plunge right in. As soon as I relaxed Gilbert added another finger and this time there was a bit of pain but nothing I couldn't handle. He thrust them in and out scissoring them to stretch the tight ring of muscle. Then he hit something and everything went white with pleasure. I screamed and clenched onto his back my nails digging in.

"D..Do that again" I panted and he smirked and complied.

Once three fingers were easily slid in and out Gilbert removed them and pulled his own pants and boxers down and spread lube on his own cock. He positioned himself and whispered to me.

"Are you ready?" I nodded and he slowly pushed in all the way to the hilt. Then he stopped to let me adjust.

"M…Move!" I shouted and he did he thrust slowly at first but then picked up the speed.

"Ngh Gil faster" I moaned out and I think it was throwing him over the edge. He sped up and grabbed my neglected cock between our bodies pumping it at the tempo of his thrusts. After a few more powerful thrusts and strokes I came hard my seed splashing onto both our chests. Gilbert milked me through my orgasm and then came himself. Kissing my neck leaving a mark that I was his. He lay beside me and pulled me close after pulling out of me.

"I love you Mattie, I love you" He whispered kissing my fore head. "my brave Mattie" I smiled and closed my eyes. I was tired and sleep was beckoning me.

"I love you too Gilbert" I whispered

"Go to sleep little bird I'll be here when you wake up."He handed me Kumajiro from the nightstand and I smiled and snuggled closer to my lover.

Days later My dad was arrested for rape and attempted murder. He's now on trial for those.

Mom and Al live in a house near Gil and me. I decided to stay with Gilbert and mom understood.

I guess I got my happy ending

Thanks for reading.

I hurt my back while writing this fic and my neck keeps cracking hahaha.

Um please review.

I'm still not good at writing lemons and I think it might be a bit rushed but I like how it turned out…I got writers block in the middle so please be nice

-TEA

I do not own APH…but I wish I did.