Disclaimer: you know the drill by now.

A/N: Inspired by the events occuring this morning at a sleepover at my friends house where the airbed occupied by one of the fellow sleepover-ers...(its a word now!) squeaked everytime she moved as it rubbed against the chest of draws beside it. Since I was dozing at the time the squeaking seemed almost constant and conjured this in my mind.
Obviously having friends with very dirty minds they immeditely giggled when I told them of the inspiration recieved and I'm sure many of you will be able to work out what the first thing to run through their minds was! (You never know, I may use the idea somewhere later one)

Squeak, Squeak

From: Jack Harkness

To: All

Tosh has asked that you guys are as quiet as possible today so that she can make sure some super duper programme she's created works properly. Obviously there's a limit to how quiet its physically possible to be but please no silly business (Owen).

Sent via Torchwood handheld system

From: Owen Harper

To: Jack Harkness

How long have we got to be quiet for? All day!

From: Jack Harkness

To: Owen Harper

Yes.

From: Gwen Cooper

To: Toshiko Sato

Is there something squeaking by you? Maybe something in the computer?

From: Toshiko Sato

To: Gwen Cooper

I can't hear anything, sorry Gwen. Must be something near you? Check the fan on the computer.

From: Gwen Cooper

To: Ianto Jones

Can you hear something squeaking? I asked Tosh and she said she couldn't but then she's so engrossed a weevil playing bagpipes could probably sneak up on her.

From: Ianto Jones

To: Gwen Cooper

Thank you for that mental image Gwen.

I did hear something when I took the coffee round, it was loudest near the workstations. Happy hunting!

From: Gwen Cooper

To: Owen Harper

Can you hear something squeaking?

From: Owen Harper

To: Gwen Cooper

I think you need a hearing test love. There's nothing squeaking. Come see me first thing tomorrow. Provided we're allowed to breathe again that is.

From: Jack Harkness

To: Owen Harper

Owen! Stop squeaking your bloody chair! I can see you from in here.

CCTV imagining shows Owen Harper swear under his breath before gesturing rudely at Jack Harkness's office.

From: Jack Harkness

To: Owen Harper

I saw that too Owen. Go clean out Myfanwy's nest or something useful. And before you ask, no you may not take any chocolate with you.