(A/N: this is the last part. I wrote this today when I was finally feeling sad again. Say thank you to the wonderful Gigi-s in my school :P Anyways, this chapter got long again. *sigh*. I hope I can satisfy you :) Hope you enjoy it!)

Disclaimer: No, still don't own it.

*******

You are studying day in and day out. You are getting all straight A-s. Almost a year has already passed and you didn't dare to go home during this time, because you are still fighting the feelings that you wish did not exist, because you're still in love with her, because you're still sick.

Lies. Lies. Lies. You're telling yourself a thousand lies... You're looking at the mirror and smiling at your reflection (Now you know you're still alive, now you're sure you're not a ghost yet.) You're trying to ignore the fact that the 'happy glow' is missing from your lifeless eyes.

You're sitting in your room, books open in front of you, the pages getting flipped because of the wind of the fan-blades. But your gaze is fixed on that dull spot in the wall that you're been watching for the last half an hour. You tell yourself that you're just trying to test your attention span. You're not thinking. Nope, you're totally not thinking about her. At all. Not a bit.

You're clutching your pen a bit too hard and your fingers pain. That's totally the reason why tears are flowing down your cheeks.

Lies. Lies. Lies. You're telling yourself a thousand lies….And that doesn't end your pain. So you finally grab your chemistry book and concentrate on it again. Within an hour, you've completely drowned yourself in Planck's Quantum Theory of Radiation.

When you try to sleep, the pain returns again. You wish you could just close your eyes and wake up somewhere else, you wish this is some dream, you wish this isn't real. You try to pretend to yourself that this isn't real. And it doesn't work- because you're too logical, rational and scientific to fool yourself, because you get sudden depression attacks for apparently no reason, because you're sick.

*****

It's the beginning of the Christmas vacation and everyone (except you) is packing their bags. That's when you see her again. You're not sure why you freeze, but you think it has something to do with the way your heart is pounding uncontrollably in your chest and memories are rushing back again, playing like a movie in your mind's eyes.

"What are you doing here?" you ask in shock and horror. You think she is here to talk you into returning home again, and you're so not going to give in to her again! Nope.

She hurls her heavy bags at you, making a 'Phew' sound and handing you a letter. It's from your mother, and your eyes widen as you read it, because oh gosh your mother sent her to stay with you for a 'few days', and oh God you are given the impossible task of convincing her that she needs to get into college next year.

"Looks like mom has given up all hopes that you'll return home." She scoffs, tucking strands of hair behind her ears, and you try not to notice how beautiful she still looks.

You look down and you are silent for a minute, because you are suddenly missing your mother and need her hugs to make everything feel better; because you're feeling alone, because you're feeling homesick, because you're feeling guilty, because you're sick.

"You know I can't-"You look up finally and try to protest, but stop when you see her glaring at someone behind you.

You turn around and see… a hundred students in the campus ground, okay.

"Who's that?" she asks you casually, gesturing at someone with her eyes.

You look at that (poor) person who's been rewarded with her scorn, and wave. "That's Liz, my classmate." You reply, smiling at the girl staring at you.

And then you stare at Alex, because you think that you heard her snort, but you are not sure, because she can't possibly hate someone without a reason, right? But well, it's Alex. She has a history of disliking your friends, just because they are your friends, and they are intelligent (geeks).

There's a tap on your shoulder and you turn around to see Liz smiling at you. "Hey."

"Hey." You smile back politely, even though your mind is still paying attention to Alex. You never realized when you become so super-sensitive to her presence.

"Who's that?" she asks, gesturing at Alex.

"I'm Alex." Alex replies, and for a moment you think she sounds… annoyed?

You're not sure if you should add the 'sister' part, because you have never mentioned her to anyone, because if you start talking about her, you're sure people will figure out how you feel about her, because you're sick.

"Hi Alex. I'm Liz." Liz smiles politely and offers her hand.

Alex reluctantly shakes her hand and fakes a smile. And you know this can't be good. Poor Liz can probably get turned into a mouse.

"So, what brings you here?" Liz asks her politely, smiling again, and you know how much Alex hates 'nice' and 'polite'.

"I'm visiting my brother?" Alex replies briefly, and there, your secret is out. She checks her wrist watch in annoyance and grabs your arm. "We're getting late. Come on, Justin."

Then she does the unthinkable- she takes your hand in hers and leads you away, greeting Liz with a small goodbye.

Your brain immediately starts doing permutations and combinations, and there is hope rising in your chest, as your mind lists a hundred reasons why Alex is behaving this way. Most of them are not logical, but you don't care, because you have stopped listening to your brain the moment she took your hand, because it is becoming impossible to breathe with the happy dance of your heart, because you are sick.

*****

You enter your room and place the bags on the floor. Your room-mate quirks an eye-brow at you questioningly.

"I'm Alex." She speaks before you can say anything. "I came to visit him."

Your room-mate nods and then turns to look at you, grinning suggestively. "You never told me you had such a beautiful girlfriend."

You are shocked and horrified and the word 'NO' doesn't leave your mouth which is currently hanging open.

She elbows you to snap you out of your trance, and then shakes her head at your room-mate. "I'm his sister, but hey, thanks for the compliment." She smiles at him, and you feel sick again. Because she is clearly crushing on your roommate and you'll just have to stand and watch them flirt. (She broke up with her boyfriend a few months back, and you tell yourself that you felt relieved because you're an over-protective big brother. Lies. Lies. Lies. You tell yourself a thousand lies….)

"I didn't see you when I came here before." She speaks again, and you can feel your heart sink at the sweetness of her tone, because Alex never does sweet unless she wants something (or someone).

"I was at home for vacation." He replies politely, his lips curving upward into a small smile, and you can't take this anymore.

She gives you an accusatory look, her eyes telling you 'see-people-go-home-during-vacations'. You feel helpless. You want to go home- but you can't. You don't have a choice. Because you've already planned your future, and that involves running away to distant places, away from your family, away from the memories. Because you know going back will make moving on more difficult (impossible) than it presently is, because you're sick.

You let out a sigh and shake your head, looking at her. "You should rest."

She doesn't reply, she just moves around to your book-shelf. "These are all yours?" she asks, touching the hard wood binding of your books, and for some reason, you don't protest (but you'd rather not think about this reason.)

"Yeah." You reply, but it sounds like a frustrated sigh.

"So you are dating your books so that you don't miss me?" she asks, turning around and fixing you with one of the deadliest glares.

"Indulging yourself into books is better than indulging yourself into drinking and drugs." You snap. (A/N: that's my belief basically)

Your roommate is pretending to read the newspaper while he is listening intently, and this is definitely not the best place to have this conversation, but you don't care, because when she's with you, the world just blurs out, because you're sick.

She tilts her head to a side and thinks for a moment. "Really?" she asks in an amused tone, and okay, you should have expected this, because hello- it's Alex you're dealing with!

You room-mate lets out a laugh, clearly enjoying your sibling bantering, and you have to glare at him to make him shut up.

And then you turn towards her again. "YES!" you yell.

"Fine, I get it." She yells back, making a face. "So you don't drink even though you're in college?" she asks, a teasing smirk slowly forming in her lips as she crosses her arms in front of her.

You just stare at her in disbelief. "What does college have to do with drinking?"

She shrugs and sits down on your bed, taking off her sneaker and socks and throwing them on the floor.

"Whoa! Decent much?" you scold, picking up the discarded footwear and neatly placing them in a corner of your room. You don't have to look back to know she's rolling her eyes. You know her every move too well, you grew up with her, remember?

"What about parties?" she asks again, yawning. And from the sound you hear you know she just stretched in your bed. (You really need a bed that isn't half broken and doesn't make so much noise.)

"I've been to a few." You reply honestly, turning back and walking to sit beside her in your bed, and you're totally not fantasizing anything in your mind. You look at her and you read her mind, like you always do. "No, there are no parties now, and hypothetically, even if there was, I wouldn't take you." You declare before she can even ask you.

She glares at you (and you know she's looking for new blackmail material) and punches your arm. "Sometimes you sound like you're my dad."

You smile slightly. "No, I'm not dad. You can't manipulate me that easily."

She smiles back, a genuine smile that you haven't seen for such a long time, and gosh you missed it so much more than you realized! "I can totally manipulate you!"

You know she is right. She has this strange way of hypnotizing you with those deep chocolate brown orbs hidden behind those silk curtains of long thick eyelashes, and gosh no, you're not staring again! You forcefully tear your gaze away from her, something that you have mastered the strength for somehow. You have no witty comeback, so you get up instead. "You take some rest. I need to study."

"Only you'd study during vacations." She teases in a sleepy voice, and pulls your comforter up to her shoulders. You're know you'll never wash it so that it always smells like her, so that it always feels like her, because when it comes to her, you don't care about hygiene anymore, because you're sick.

She has traveled a long distance, she looks tired, she looks beautiful- like an angel, and it's so hard to believe that this is the devil of a sister in your life!

You sit in your study chair, your back turned towards her, because you're not sure if you can study in her presence, and this time, it's not because of the fact that she grew up poking you with her pencils when you did your homework.

You're trying to focus your mind on the sums in front of you, you're trying not to think about her, and you tell yourself that you're succeeding. But somehow log 10 becomes 2, sin 90 becomes 0, pie becomes 7/22, and you can't recognize where you've made a mistake! This has been working for years, this technique of distracting yourself is fool-proof, it always works.

Or not. Your roommate is leaving the room to give you two some privacy. When he sees you staring at the incorrect sum, he points out that log 10 is 1, sin 90 is 1, and pie is 22/7, and you feel like hiding in the tenth grade again. You can see her smiling, even with her eyes closed, clearly relishing the fact that you got a sum wrong. (You're sure this will feature in all her tweets for the next week, you'd be lucky if the retweets end within a month!)

You scratch the page, and start from the beginning again. This time you get the sum right (thank goodness!). You're studying like you're insane, and you can feel the pain dissipate.

Then she has to get up and grab the discarded newspaper. Your hands reach your mouth two seconds after you gasp. Alex Russo is reading news?

"Cancer. Hmm. Do: Be practical. Don't: be involved in trading. Expect: changes at work." And she's reading all the sun-signs twice and then thrice, and okay, so she discovered a new way to disturb you when you're studying. That should be technique no. 109 (excluding the fact that her mere presence is enough to destroy all your concentration.)

"What is it, Alex?" you sigh in frustration, turning around in your seat to face her (even though that isn't such a good idea.)

She shrugs. So now she wants to play innocent! "How long do you know Liz?"

"W-what?" you stutter at the unexpected question. "Umm… more than a year? Why?"

She shakes her head, smiling to yourself. "You know she's into you, right?"

"What?" you almost jump out of your seat in shock.

She glares at you again. "Do you like her?"

"Yeah." You reply without thinking, because you're totally sure you like her. Lies. Lies. Lies. You tell yourself a thousand lies.

She sighs, and you can't read her expression anymore, you can't recognize the foreign emotion in her eyes. "You bite your bottom lip when you lie. You might wanna work on that."

You finally realize that you're teeth in nibbling your lower lip. "I'm not lying." You defend yourself. "You'll see. I'll ask her out tomorrow."

She looks away, and theirs no comeback. Weird.

"How long are you going to stay here?" you ask in a tone that sounds harsher than you intended, but whatever, you need her to leave so that you can study (and for thousand other reasons that you'd rather not say.)

"Until you decide you wanna come home." She replies, trying to hide the (evil) grin forming in her lips.

"I told you I can't go home." You snap.

"Because you don't wanna be near me right?" she asks matter-of-factly.

You only nod, unsure where this whole conservation is going.

"Look Justin, if you want, you can stay here during the vacation, studying like a geek." She says, and you feel like she's giving up a bit too quickly. "And I'll just stay here with you and make sure I destroy all your stuff."

Or not. Well, one can always hope?

"OR you can come home and stay with your family. Either way, you'll have to stay with me." She finishes with a shrug.

You stare at her in disbelief again. Sneaky. Conniving. Devious. Alex.

"Take your time." She assures, no longer trying to conceal her victorious grin.

"Do you realize it's too dangerous for you to stay near me?" you blurt out all of a sudden.

"You and dangerous? Please." She waves her hand in a non-chalant gesture, and again, she's not taking this seriously. Irresponsible. Carefree. Apathetic. Alex.

You glare at her, trying your best to look serious and not like a school-boy-with-a-crush. "You're not safe with me." You confess, looking down, disgusted by how sick you are.

"Really?" She crosses her arms in front of her in a defensive gesture, and you know this can mean only one thing- challenge. "How?"

"You don't need to know the details." You snap, because you're so not getting there. You don't even want to imagine the things you want to do to her, and you are not sure if you can ever bring yourself to blurt them out to her. (You've found out a perfect anti-truth spell. Thank you studying!)

"Hey, you're the one who gives importance to details." She snaps back.

You mentally curse yourself, because she is right, you're the one who's been lecturing her about details for the last seventeen years. "Go home Alex." You order, but your voice is shaky, and your hands are trembling.

"Mom asked me to stay here." She defends herself. "And you know I always listen to mom."

You tilt your head and narrow your eyebrows, because, really, she wants you to buy that?

"Fine." She yells, getting irritated at the argument. "But you always listen to mom. And you'll be disobeying her if you send me back. You don't want to do that, do you?" She grins mischievously in a way that makes your blood boil and your lovesick heart throb rapidly at the same time.

"Yes I do." You yell back, and she looks stunned at your response. "Your safety is more important to me. I'm your brother. I'm supposed to protect you, not…."

You trail off, because you're so not saying the words.

"Not what Justin?" she presses; and you're convinced that she wants to embarrass you to death.

"You don't wanna know." You say, looking away, and you hope she buys that.

But she doesn't. "Yes I do." She replies in a determined voice. "Justin!" she demands, and you can't take it anymore!

You're yelling at the top of your voice, not caring if anyone hears you. "I want to pin you to that wall or that bed or that floor and… and….."

"And what?" she yells back, and gosh she wants to hear more?

"And kiss you." You barely manage to whisper with the guilt and the pain choking your throat. You're looking at her expectantly and fearfully.

You don't get the slap that you expected. She's simply reaching into your drawer, taking out your cookie jar, stealing cookies from it and closing the… what just happened?

"You needed 20 odd attempts to get your first kiss right." She's munching on a cookie, talking with her mouth full and…. grinning at you?

"And you're bringing that up now because..?" you ask in an annoyed tone, because seriously, what does that have anything to do with this?

"Dad said no magic while I'm here." She replies, slowly walking up to you, and your breath is caught in your chest again. "You have one chance."

"For what? Why do I…" you pause mid-sentence, realizing what she just said. You're slapping your face hard; trying to wake up from this weird dream, but it's not working, because she's still standing in front of you, giving you an incredulous look.

"You want me to…." You gulp before you get the sinful words out. "Kiss you?"

"Nope." And she decides to go with denial. "You want to kiss me. I just want you to fulfill your dreams."

You're staring at her in disbelief yet again. What is she saying? You reach your hand up and touch her forehead, feeling her temperature. "Are you okay?"

You hear her mumble something about 'dork', 'good-for-nothing', 'should-have-known', and the next thing you know is your eyes are drifting shut as her lips meet yours. She's unleashing years of carefully hidden love and repressed desire. And you wonder if you really good for nothing. How could you have missed this? (Thank you jealousy. Thanks Liz.)

She finally pulls away and you're still looking a bit dazed. "So?" she asks, grinning at you wickedly, yet innocently, like nothing happened.

"So?" you ask back, because you are not sure what else to say, because you are recovering from an almost-heart-attack caused by unexpected happiness, because for the first time in a long time you're sick but not disgusted with yourself.

"We'll run away after your college ends." She declares, and you are slightly shocked when you feel yourself nod.

"I'll get a good job, wherever we go." You announce with resolution, as your mind paints pictures of a bright future ahead. You are not that great of an artist, even when you are painting in your mind, but this time, the pictures are colorful and clear. "For that, I need to get good grades."

She nods in understanding, and there's a conference of lips again and from that moment, life seems great again. You call her up every day, and she talks about how perfect life would be when you run away. You go home during vacations, and she curls up into you as you watch the science channel, and you have to occasionally shut her complains up with secret kisses. You're still studying most of the time, but it is not because of pain anymore. You're spending hours in the library, studying physics, chemistry, biology, maths, and at the same time, researching on the perfect place to run away to, and enlisting the possible jobs you can get, reminding yourself again why you need good grades. You have decided to be a scientist and to spend your life researching on genetics, because at the moment that seems to be the greatest problem in your life. You are aware that you need a great academic result for that.

So, you're studying day in and day out. You're getting all straight A-s.

(A/N: That's it guys. Please leave a review? BTW, I know this is off-topic, but I'm just curious to know this: if you've listened to 'Disappear' By Selena Gomez from the WOWP movie soundtrack, do you somehow feel it's sung about Justin, set in or after the movie?)