Harro peoples of fanfictionisity~! Please ascuse [excuse] the vocabulimuhnary [vocabulary] throughout the story n__n. I'm asking the people who go HERPDERP THIS STORY IS THE FAILZ HERP to go on and say whatever you want to say, but include why it's the failz, or else I get to laugh at you wasting seconds of your life flaming this story. 8D. THANKS GAIS. & Oh lawd, I hope I'm doing this right LOL. First time on FanFiction, yes that's me! Enjoy the story~! [If possible]

Disclaimer: I am not the genius behind Percy Jackson and the Olympians and I don't own any of the characters that from that story, are in this. [Hao2MakeSense] BUT I am the idiot behind this story and I own my own characters. Well my characters are built off from a few people, but that's beside the point.

Caution: HeidiLikesTurtles is not responsible if your eyes burn from the fail of this story; because I'm sure they will. n__n!

Chapter 1:

When Vacuums Have Fire

The first thing you need to know about me, even before you learn my name, is that I'm probably the most grotesque, unluckiest, and strangest child you'll ever meet. Okay. Let's move on.

I'm a forgotten child. Literally. I have no idea who my parents are and don't have any, so therefore I am an orphan. My parents aren't dead, though, I know that much. No matter what my uncle says, my mom and her husband aren't deceased.

You see, my Uncle Carl takes care of me. Kind of. Well, used to. He's shipping me off to New York to live in an orphanage. He started rebuking me, telling he's had enough whenever I nearly exploded my old school, Dobie High School. I mean, they didn't have to expel me. I wasn't the one who set the chemistry room on fire. It was only because my lab partner, the new kid, got exasperated from not knowing how to make a "potion" as good as Harry Potter, so he mixed random stuff together and then I got blamed.

Well anyways, now I'm supposed to spend all my high school years (excluding my freshman year, because I got expelled from that school, but I still passed somehow) there. Why is he taking me from Texas to New York? Because he obviously doesn't like me and wants to make sure he doesn't hear a single word about me.

Before I get ahead of myself, let me introduce you to me. I'm Alice. Just Alice. I have a bunch of middle names, but no last name. Uncle Carl was the one who didn't let me have a last name. I'm only half sure he has the power to do that.

"You'd be a disgrace to the name Asuncion!" he roared when I asked him.

If the Asuncion family was a family of drunks then I am a disgrace. Uncle Carl is one of those people who come home late at night, like, late at night, drunk. He's abusive, too. When he doesn't get his way he throws chairs at me. Evil person is evil.

Anyways, I'm planning to start over in my new school, Goode. I'm going to a place where no one knows who I am, so I might as well begin again. At Dobie I used to be known as Alice in Wonderland or the she-Harry Potter person. I mean don't have black robes and a wand or an owl named Hedwig. What I do have, though, are green eyes, jet black hair, and glasses. They're rectangular glasses, though. Not the weird "geeky" kind (I wish!), but ordinary glasses.

Besides the fact that I'm an orphan, I'm not your average sixteen-year-old. Not only am I diagnosed with ADHD, but dyslexia, too. Yes, I'm a hyperactive girl who can't read to save her life. Woop de do.

So today's the day I'm going to the orphanage. I already got off the airplane with my small luggage of clothes and other stuff, so I'm trying to find a taxi. Trying.

After what seemed like hours looking for a yellow car I actually spotted one. I took my stuff and went into the taxi. I asked the driver if he could take me to St. John's Orphanage.

"An orphan, huh? Well I guess I could take you there. A good few miles here, though." He looked at me. I blinked. Then I realized I had to pay him, so, dubious of what to give him, I handed him a fifty. He raised his eyebrows but didn't say anything, and drove.

I looked out the window. Manhattan was flooded with people. At a red light, my eyes were focused on a pedestal that was labeled "OLISN", well, "LIONS". The strange thing about it is that there were no lions on it. What a strange city.

Five more stoplights after (don't ask me how I know how many stoplights, I'm just bored, okay?) I saw this boy that was walking down the street. He had green eyes and black hair. He was wearing black Reeboks, blue jeans, and a red T-shirt. What surprised me is that I had the same clothes on and those same features. Although he didn't have glasses, I could see really clearly he was staring back at me.

Just on time, the traffic light changed to green. I looked back and saw the boy still staring at me. I quickly turned away, and didn't dare look back the rest of the way.

I arrived at the orphanage. It was this gigantic grey building the size of a high school with big words that said something like "TS. HNSJ'O RPEANOAHG". It took me a few seconds to decipher it into "ST. JOHN'S ORPHANAGE."

The driver person asked if I needed help with my things but I told him it was okay. I had heavier things to carry other then clothes and such. On the glass doors of the place was a poster that read, "We always make the unhappy smile like they've never smiled before!"

I beg to differ. When I walked in the whole place was -- and looked -- depressing. No one was smiling or anything. This building building was the epitome of unhappiness. I went to some lady at the counter and she told me to fill out this form, so in my somewhat neat handwriting, and through the difficulty of my dyslexia, I did.

Name (First, last): Alice

Gender (M or F): F

Birthday (M/D/Y): August 18th, 1993

Age: 16

Ethnicity: Caucasian I think

Parents:

…

Why is the thing asking me who my parents are when I filling in a form to live in an orphanage?

I filled out the rest of the form and handed it to the lady. She frowned and asked me what was my last name, why do I only think I'm Caucasian, and why I didn't fill in the "Parents" section. I answered her questions in order.

"Well," I began. "I'm not allowed to have a last name, I'm not really sure if I'm Caucasian, and I don't have any parents. That's why I'm registering at an orphanage."

She looked from me to the form. "I'll just put your parents as dead."

"But they aren't dead."

"They are now."

I raised my eyebrows. Before I could get a chance to say anything, she told me what room I was going to stay in, when it was time for dinner, and when curfew was. I took my stuff with me and went to room 13. How lucky I am.

You see, there are three floors to this place. Fifteen rooms on each. I live alone on the first floor. My room is… hmm. You know those little corner things that people in businesses? Square that and you can see the area of my room. It's kind of big but not really. It's a square-ish thing. The walls are gray and decorated with massive amounts of graffiti, and the carpets are gray, too. Luckily they're not stained with anything.

There's a bed on the east side of my room and a two-shelved-drawer to the opposite of it. What I really liked is that there's a window. It's… how do I explain… five feet above the ground? I could just stand normally and see people walk on the streets. The bad thing is that I could probably get robbed easily or murdered, but who would want to kill me?

After I got settled down and stuff I decided to take a walk in the city that I'll now begin call home. To the left of the orphanage is an apartment and oh my, it's huge. I looked up at the blue sky, using my hand to block the blinding sun. The clouds looked like a painting; a work of art.

I began to explore the city by foot. I went to the park, passed by my new school, and looked for a job. I mean even though I'm only sixteen there are these places looking for people to work for them. The orphanage already supplies food for everyone because people actually donate, but I like buying stuff, so why not get a job?

So I applied for this job at this buffet that was looking for a cashier. The thing about it is that after work they'd let the workers have a free meal. I thought it was a good deal, so what the heck?

It took me about five thousand hours to decipher what each word said, seeing that the text was so small. When I reached the question if I had any criminal records I wondered if almost blowing up an entire school was a crime. Then again, I didn't do it. I thought about it for a moment and checked NO.

Filling out the rest of the thing, I slid it into the application box after I was done. When I left the restaurant I saw this chickafree [Chick] on this wooden bench staring at me through purple eyes. Purple eyes; how queer. She had an absolutely gigantic newspaper in her hands. I couldn't decipher the title and I knew it would be awkward to stare so I looked past her. She looked backwards to look for what I was staring at, which was nothing.

I used this time to my advantage. I spun on my heel and ran as fast as I could to the orphanage. Panting, I reached the doorway and pushed it open. Well I tried to push it open. It was a pull. Yay for reading. I did manage to get in, though. Running to my room, all these thoughts ran through my head. I pushed them out and proceeded.

This is where I'd like to say that this was the end of my day. Unfortunately, I can't. You see, when I got back "home" it was only 5:30 P.M. Dinner's at 6:00 P.M.

So I went to go eat with the other orphans in the crowded cafeteria. To admit, everyone looked happy. Pretty good for an orphanage, I guess. I mean, I was expecting people who appeared to be having the worst time of their life, but I guess that was just me. How... wonderful.

There are twenty tables in the cafeteria. They're all circular and hold eight people each. Out of those, twelve were full, three were half-full, and the rest were empty. I walked over to an empty table. I felt the stare of -- by the look of them -- stupid girls, glaring at me from the corner of their eye. I'm kind of judgmental. Sorry.

I sat at an empty table, of course, not wanting to get food. Me not being hungry? Well that's certainty a first.

Trying to remember why I even came here if I wasn't even hungry, I went to go get water. There, to my horror, was a lady maid person with purple eyes. She was staring right at me, standing next to the water fountain. I had a feeling my trick from before won't work a second time.

Okay, so she had a vacuum cleaner, which was really grotesque because the cafeteria was completely done in white tile. No, it wasn't one of those small vacuums you hold in your hand to clean surfaces and stuff. I'm talking about the ones that are connected to an outlet by a wire and are used to clean carpets. Looking at the wire in her hand, it seemed as if she could run around the whole building five times before she would run out of it.

She smiled at me. I deciphered her name plate which said JOYCE. I blinked. She grinned, showing pointy teeth. Well that's certainly normal.

"Hello," she said, her voice somewhat gentle. Somewhat gentle.

I said something real clever like, "Uh, hi."

Joyce motioned for me to come forward, so against my better judgments, I actually did get closer to this lunatic. She inhaled deeply. "My, my! Aren't you a good one!" she exclaimed. What did she mean by that?

"Uh... what?" I had no idea what was going on. In other words, I was confuzzled.

She put her hand on my cheek. I felt uneasy; uncomfortable. Then she said "Oh, you're so young! It's too bad that you have to go so soon, isn't it! But it had to happen sooner or later..." I blinked. "Now… stay still so I could eat you!" She said that in such a nice way I almost did let her -- Wait… what?

I backed away. "What? I'm not gonna let you eat me! What, do you think I'm stupid?" I yelled at the cannibal.

She frowned. "Well, you certainly don't look so bright. I'm sorry but… you just smell so… appetizing." She took a step forward, and I took a step back. I wonder what she meant by appetizing. More importantly how could she say she could smell me?

I looked over to see if anyone was watching, but they were all drowned in their conversations.

"Umm… Miss uh… Joyce lady… Wouldn't you rather eat someone else? Maybe the -- er -- terrorists or something?"

"Oh no!" she said, her eyes wider. "They don't smell as good as you!"

"Gee, thanks for the compliment you freak."

She continued to talk as if she didn't hear me. "I don't think you'll let me eat you that easily so I guess we'll have to do it the hard way." She sighed. Before I could even think of what she would do to me she turned on her vacuum cleaner.

As I thought before, it was a really grotesque because we were in a completely tiled area. What made it even more strange is that it didn't exactly… clean.

The vacuum cleaner of death shot fire.

My reaction was like any others. My eyes were so wide. I looked to my right. No one noticed. Well, no one noticed until this chickafree looked to her right and screamed. That caused the other orphans to look where she was looking. They screamed too, and backed away to the opposite of side of it. Me? I just stood there like an idiot, which I am.

I actually came back to my senses when the Joyce lady person was walking towards me. Her eyes changed to the color of flames. Her smile was… gross. It was this deformed smirk thing.

"Honey… just stay still! It'll be no problem once you're dead!" Joyce sounded like a dentist or a doctor before the "once you're dead!" part. I didn't know what to do. The smoke detectors came around and an alarm went off. Sprinklers came on from the ceilings and I would've got drenched in water, but I was under an area with no sprinklers. Joyce didn't seem so happy about this. I realized something when she tried swatting the fire away like a repoptarted [retard] person: she only relies on fire.

I made a plan in less then two seconds. What I did was I ran around her, since the water fountain was behind Joyce. Unfortunately she saw what I was up to and tried to run me over with her flame-shooting vacuum.

I jumped on the tables, grabbing random drinks and chucking it at her. I had lovely aim because I always pitched for the Tennis team. Oh gosh, I forgot my Tennis stuff back in Tex- Am I really thinking about this right now?

I hid behind a brick column on the side of the cafeteria. Okay. I'm about to get devoured by some chick with a flaming vacuum cleaner unless I do something fast. I wracked my brain for a solution to not get killed but nothing seemed to pop up. This was unreal. I looked back to see where she was. Maybe if she got far enough from the water fountain I could take the hose and spray her. Then again, that's just a maybe, and maybes aren't good enough in a life-or-death situation.

So anyways when I looked back I saw that Joyce was about two feet away from me. I took that chance and ran to the water fountain, panicking. "Oh no you don't!" Joyce yelled. I looked behind me to see her pointing her palms towards me. I ducked under the nearest table because I thought she was going to do some kind of kamehameha thing from Dragon Ball Z.

About two seconds later the water fountain exploded on me. I was completely drenched in water. Suddenly I felt something surge through me. It felt like life, maybe energy, but I called it power. I got out from under the table and stood, facing Joyce. I didn't try to do anything, my body seemed to move on its own.

Behind me I heard an eruption. I wanted to look back but just couldn't. Out of the blue, Joyce suddenly had water attacking her in every direction. I watched as she and her murdering device evaporated into nothingness. Well I think nothingness. The water dissolved into the air (I'm not entirely sure if that's possible) and what was left behind was dust.

I fell to my knees. The sprinklers were, if possible, making me wetter and wetter. At least I thought they were. I wasn't wet at all. I mean, I was completely soaked a minute ago, but not now. The water coming from the sprinklers was reflecting off of me. I tried to make sense out of it. I remembered people rushing towards me. Voices were all around me. I couldn't comprehend all of their assertions but only fragments.

I heard something like, "Water... explosion... dry..."

Then I blacked out.

And that, was the end of my crappy first day. Thank the gods.

Hurr. Review if you want to; don't if you don't. Yuhr I have low self esteem, but who knows, this story could be even more fail then a security camera pointing towards a wall! ;Bawl!

If the story is really really crappy I'll rewrite the whole thing. I promise!

Note: Someone tell me what OOC and stuff means. ;; Out of character? That's my best guess. xD