HOLY CRAP THIS UPDATE IS LIKE THE FIRST THIS YEAR.

HOW DISGRACEFUL AM I?

D:

GUYS, I AM SO SO SO SO SO SORRY FOR NOT UPDATING D: I had my laptop stolen a while back which contained all of the story files etc and all my books on it, so I simply didn't have the inspiration, time or knowledge to write any more of the story. However, now I have read the story back over and have remembered what I was heading towards, so now, here is, FINALLY, chapter 14 of Confession of a Skeleton!

Yes, I'm evil. Love me. 3

ENJOY, MY PEOPLES!

~SkulduggeryCain

After his conversation with Tanith, Skulduggery had headed into town in the Bentley in order to buy himself some suitable clothes to go to the dance in. He didn't want to embarrass Valkyrie in his regular pinstriped suit, and he figured that he couldn't wear his old tuxedo as he was pretty sure it was over 100 years old now. Because of these two factors, he pulled up outside one of the biggest clothing stores in the city centre and activated his facade. After making sure everything was in the right place, he stepped out of the Bentley and activated the car lock with a simple press of the button on the key. He strode towards the doors with a springy step in his stride.

Two hours later, Skulduggery re-emerged from the department store carrying two large boxes and a smaller box. He had made a lot of money over the years doing his job as a detective, and as such he could afford to splash out every so often. He had bought himself two new outfits; one was a black tuxedo, and the other a dark pinstriped suit. He had told himself many times that one could never have enough suits.

As he made his way back over to the Bentley, he noticed that a certain dark-haired person was leaning up against it. He nearly dropped the boxes in surprise at the sight of her, and tried unsuccessfully to hide them. In the end he gave up and sighed as loud as a skeleton could.

"China..."

"Skulduggery." China Sorrows smiled widely at him from where she was standing. "What a pleasant surprise... And it's an even bigger one to me that you have done what the modern world has been doing for the past two centuries; shopping!"

"Yes, I've gone shopping, and what of it?" Skulduggery had reached the Bentley by now and slowly placed his three boxes on the top of the bonnet.

"You NEVER go shopping."

"Well yes, I know that, but..."

"But what? Is there something special going on that I haven't heard about? Because if there is, that would be amazing! As you say, I DO usually hear about anything important..." China smiled her dazzling grin, displaying all of her perfectly-aligned gleaming white teeth. "So? Care to share?"
Skulduggery unlocked the Bentley and then took the boxes back into his arms. Placing them carefully in the back seat, he straightened up and looked into China's startling blue eyes.

"Do you really have to know?"

"Naturally. I AM the gossip monger, as you have told me so many times..."

Skulduggery rolled his facade's eyes and nodded towards the passenger side of the car.

"Get in if you want. I'll explain on the way, and then drop you off at wherever you were going."

"That's very kind of you," China smiled and opened the car door. She slid inside the passenger seat of the Bentley and shut the door with a brief click. Skulduggery soon followed her in, closing the door and buckling his seatbelt into the locking position.

"Oh, and Skulduggery?"

Skulduggery's head visibly sagged. He inserted the key into the ignition and turned it, nodding briefly as the engine kicked into life. As the car begun to start up, he slowly turned his head in China's directly and gazed at her scrutinously.

"What now?"

"I am not your apprentice, and as such, I do hope that you don't expect me to wear a seatbelt."

"It's your own funeral," Skulduggery hammered his foot down onto the accelerator and the car sped out of the car park.

A few hours later, Skulduggery was back at his house hanging up his new clothes in his wardrobe. It had turned out that China had infact known all along about his situation with Valkyrie, and so she had taken it upon herself to give him some tips on what to do, much like Tanith had earlier in the day.

After hanging up his clothes an deactivating his facade, he decided to take a book from his shelf and have a good old-fashioned read. For a while, he was happy in the fantasy world of J.R.R. Tolkien, however after an hour or so his mobile phone began playing 'The Girl From Ipanema', signifying that someone was calling him.
Skulduggery carefully placed his bookmark back into the book and then strode across the room to where his phone was still vibrating on the armrest of a chair. He looked at the caller ID for a moment before whipping the phone up to where his ear should be and accepting the call.

"Skulduggery! Are you there?"

"Grand Mage? What on earth could you be calling me for at this time?" Skulduggery used his free hand to support himself against the wall.

"You know a few days ago, you brought in Billy-Ray Sanguine about that Grekinjo guy?"

"Yeah, I remember that... Has something happened?"

"Sanguine has broken out of his cell, lord knows how! He's escaped from the building and it is evident that he's heading back off to his boss. We're trying to locate him, but we're going to need every man we've got to help capture this moron and his boss, whoever that may be. I expect to see you and your apprentice here in a few hours or god help you, you're fired!"

Skulduggery tightened his grip on the phone and fixated his glare on a crack in the paintwork on his wall.

"Sir, I already told you that myself and Valkyrie are not open to work tonight! We have other arrangements. You already agreed to us having this time away from work!"

"I agreed to you having that time off while Sanguine was still in custody! I am not joking about you two losing your jobs, Detective Pleasant. Get yourselves over to the Sanctuary by 6pm or I swear, you two are fired! And I am NOT joking!"

The phone went dead and Skulduggery's glare intensified. His one night with Valkyrie, and he couldn't even have that. He had wanted to tell her today, and he still would even if he had to do it while beating up two evil fiends.

"Damn that asshole Sanguine..." Skulduggery uttered before flicking through his phone contacts and dialling Valkyrie's number.

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