Disclaimer: I don' own Hetalia.
Things France isn't allowed to do:
1. I am not allowed to do anything connected to Yaoi.
-Even if I England likes it.
-Even if I have been given permission by Hungary.
2. I am not allowed to take out Germany's dogs for a walk.
3. I am not allowed to tell Italy about the birds and the bees.
4. I am not allowed to go anywhere near Russia's sisters.
-Or the Baltics.
-Or the Balkans
-I'm bad influence and Russia will hit me.
5. I'm not allowed to show Canada any porn sites.
6. I'm not allowed to kidnap nations at Christmas and take pictures of them.
-Even if the nation in question is Prussia.
7. I'm not allowed to ask Germany and Italy when the wedding is every time they go on a date.
8. I'm not allowed to help Hungary to take pictures of other nations while they are taking a bath.
-Even if she promise to give me some of England's pictures.
9. I'm not allowed to make any jokes about Germania and Rome's relationship in front of Germany and Italy.
10. I'm not allowed to turn Sealand into my colony.
-Even if there is a chance of England agreeing to marry me just for that reason.
11. I'm not allowed to force England into marriage.
12. I'm not allowed to call the former Soviet Union "The Slavic mafia".
-The former Soviet nations will get angry and tell Russia.
13. I'm not allowed to give England panic attacks by snicking in bed with him in my birthday suit just before he wakes up.
-I'm not allowed to do that to the other nations either.
13. I'm not allowed to sing dirty songs in front of Lichtenstein.
14. I'm not allowed to help Spain with winning Romano over.
15. I'm not allowed to make a time machine.
-Or help Russia in making a time machine.
16. I'm not allowed to say that the "God told me to" excuse is still valid.
17. I'm not allowed to grand any nation with the status of empire just for fun.
18. I'm not allowed to bring Rome back to life.
-Or Germania.
-Or Byzantine.
-The last one will be devastating for the Balkan nations.
19. I'm not allowed to tell all the Slavic nations to go back to Siberia.
-It will give Russia ideas.
20. I'm not allowed to dress Austria up as a kitty.
21. I'm not allowed to tell America and Canada that they are a product of me and England having fun time.
-Because it isn't true.
22. I'm not allowed to go anywhere near Belgium.
- I'm bad influence and Germany will hit me.
23. I'm not allowed to try to date Norway.
24. I'm not allowed to be a drama Queen for something that's entirely my fault.
25. I'm not allowed to say anything at all about maid's outfits around Hungary.
-It will backfire.
26. I'm not allowed to tell others I'm going to take over the world.
-Because I won't.
-That's Russia's job.
27. I'm not allowed to show anyone pictures of Byzantine dragging Bulgaria to the altar.
-Its not amusing.
-Russia will hit me.
-America will hit me.
-Bulgaria will show everyone my baby pictures... and then hit me.
28. I'm not allowed to tell anyone of that one time Hungary beat up Russia.
-Because it is scary and will cause panic.
29. I'm not allowed to tell China that he is a pretty girl.
-Korea will hit me.
-Russia will attack me.
30. I'm not allowed to say that my archeologist found prove that Russia's true origins are from the Middle East.
-He will go and take over it.
31. I'm not allowed to recognize Prussia back as a nation.
32. I'm not allowed to say that the Slavs are aliens from Mars.
-That will give America ideas.
33. I'm not allowed to say "I'm your father!" in front of Belarus.
- She will cut me into tiny pieces.
34. I'm not allowed to explain what taking of vital regions means to younger nations.
35. I'm not allowed to swim in the pool with other nations.
36. I'm not allowed to laugh manically.
-That's Prussia's job.
37. The nickname "Prussia of the Balkans" doesn't mean that Bulgaria is Prussia's soul-mate and I should not tell Gilbert that it is exactly what it means.
-Because Prussia may actually believe me.
38. I'm not allowed to say that Turkey is a pimp.
-He will get ideas.
39. I'm not allowed to go anywhere near the Nordics.
40. I'm not allowed to call America and Iraq's war a lover's spat.
-Because it isn't.
41. I'm not allowed to turn Turkey and Greece into a couple.
42. I'm not cupid and have no right to go around in toga.
43. I will not threaten to send all my lawyers into Japan.
-Because that's just mean.
44. I will not talk about my youth in front of the other nations.
45. I'm not allowed to start another war between the Balkans.
-They will do that themselves.
46. I'm not allowed to tell everyone to send Russia on Mars.
-Because they may actually do it.
47. I'm not allowed to restore the bad friends trio.
- The female nations will skin me alive if I do.
48. I will not send black roses to Iran.
-He may thing that they are a declaration of war and bomb me.
49. I'm not allowed to tell Spain that Romano has agreed to marry him.
-Because Spain will immediately go to the church and try to marry Romano.
50. I'm not going to say that I had defeated Hun Khaganate.
-Because it was Germania who did that.
-The Slavs won't be amused and will declare me war.
-America will attack me to prove that he is the greatest nation ever lived.
-A WW3 will break out.