A Quiet Goodbye

By: ioanhoratio

A/N: PLEASE READ! This is a multi-chapter story that deals with miscarriage. I know it is more dramatic to not reveal that kind of thing before you even read the story, but I know how personal and difficult this topic is and I don't want anyone to go into this story blind. This story is rated M because this chapter includes my attempt at some smutty action (still not convinced I write it well enough but I think it is important to this story so I gave it another go) and because there are adult themes in this story. This story is sad and angst filled, but I am also trying to include the hope and eventual healing as well.

Prologue

0W 0D

Three days...it had been three days since Danny Messer had seen his wife or daughter awake for more than 15 minutes at a time. The case he'd been assigned to had kept him out late each night and his obligation to testify as an expert witness had him leaving home early the last few days. When Mac realized he had seen more of his CSI over the week than Lindsay or Lucy had, he decided to send the young man home.

Danny hadn't argued, and in fact had practically run to the locker room to grab his stuff. He had pretended not to hear Adam calling his name and had kept his head down to avoid making eye contact with those around him--desperate to not be stopped by someone on his way out.

Now he found himself standing outside the apartment he shared with his little family. It was just passed noon, and Danny knew it was likely that Lucy was down for her nap so he quietly turned the key in the lock and slowly nudged the door open. He peeked his head around the door and his gaze immediately locked with his confused wife's.

She was sitting cross-legged in the middle of the living room floor surrounded by freshly laundered clothes and towels. Her short hair was pinned messily back from her slightly flushed face and the blue camisole and work-out pants she still wore from the night before were rumpled, her thin top clearly showing her lack of a bra as well as serving as testament to the yogurt Lucy had eaten for a snack, and to Danny she couldn't have looked any more beautiful.

"You nearly gave me a heart attack," Lindsay said to him, "What are you doing home so early? I thought you were on til 6."

"Sorry," he mumbled as he walked fully into the room, closing and locking the door behind him, "I thought I'd surprise you."

Danny dropped his bag and knelt down in front of her. He took the towel she was folding out of her hands and placed it back on the pile. Lindsay gave Danny a bemused smile. She knew her husband, and she knew the look in his eyes.

"Mac sent me home early, too much overtime," Danny explained.

"Really?" Lindsay asked eagerly, "So you're home for the rest of the day?"

"Yep," Danny said simply.

Lindsay's face broke into a huge grin. "That is a good surprise."

"Lucy asleep?"

Lindsay nodded, "She went down about 10 minutes ago."

It was Danny's turn to grin. Their 18 month old would usually nap anywhere from an hour to two hours. He sent a silent prayer heavenward that it would be a two hour day as he reached out and turned Lindsay slightly then leaned her back against the warm towels.

"Can I help you?" she giggled.

He followed her body down with his, his face inches from hers, and his eyebrows danced wickedly as he answered, "Yes, yes ya can."

He rested his weight on his left arm and against her body as he laid on top of her. He took his right hand and slid it down her body to rest against her hip. Lindsay responded by bringing her hands up and gripping tightly to his upper arms, loving the feel of his hard muscles under her fingers.

"I've missed you," he whispered against her cheek, just before he moved his face down to connect his lips with hers in a light, tender kiss. He then buried his nose in the crook of her neck and breathed deeply. "I've missed your smell," he said, "I love that ya haven't showered yet."

Lindsay scoffed.

"I'm serious," Danny defended as he slid his right hand under her night shirt and allowed his fingers to graze over her breast, "and I've missed seein' ya in your jammies." Danny began massaging and kneading her breast. Lindsay gave a small moan at the pleasurable feeing of her nipple hardening.

"I've missed hearin' that sound," Danny said, his voice husky, "I've missed everything about you, even watching you fold laundry."

Despite her current sexual state, Lindsay laughed at him, "I didn't realize it was such a turn on."

"Oh, yeah," he growled.

Lindsay's smile grew, "You're just happy you don't have to do it."

Danny didn't bother to argue. They both knew it was true. Despite years of bachelorhood, Danny hated doing laundry and avoided it at all costs. Lindsay would often tease him by telling him she could hide his Christmas presents in the dryer and he would never find them. He did, however, insist, "Don't discount the sexy housewife look."

Lindsay raised an eyebrow at him.

His expression became serious as he described, "The way you take the towel and line up the edges," Danny's hand moved from her breast down to the waist of her pants, skimming back and forth as he continued, "then fold it once and smooth the wrinkles out." Danny's hand slid under the garment, his fingers tickled by the curls hidden underneath. Lindsay arched against him slightly in anticipation of what they both knew was coming. "Then," Danny's fingers slipped lower, "you fold it again, caressin' the fabric over and over." Danny allowed a single finger to roughly run up and down her opening, in tandem with his words, "until you are convinced that it's neatly folded." Danny inserted his finger into her, momentarily surprised at how wet she already was.

Lindsay hissed in delight and moaned, "I missed you too."

Danny buried his face in her neck as he began moving his finger in and out of her and teased, "Obviously."

It didn't take long after that for the couple to find themselves naked and panting, as the rode each other to release. Their harsh whispers communicating love and appreciation as they did their best to not wake their sleeping daughter; Danny's powerful thrusts causing them both waves of pleasure as he drove them higher and higher. With their skin hot and sweaty, they clung to each other, stroking and battling with a single purpose. Soon, with their faces buried in each other's necks, they found completion.

"Come shower with me," Danny suggested once he had managed to catch his breath.

From her position sprawled across his chest, Lindsay glanced at his watch. "I don't think we have time for round two," she informed him, knowing their daughter could wake at any time.

"That's fine," Danny said, "Jus' come shower with me. We'll just shower."

He wasted no time in jumping up and tugging Lindsay along behind him. She barely had time to grab two clean towels and the baby monitor as Danny hurried down the hallway.

They laughed and joked as they helped each other wash those "hard to reach" places. They played together under the spray of warm water; both as comfortable with the other's body as they were their own. It was not long though before a distraught whine carried over the monitor indicating Lucy was awake. The lover's froze, mentally willing their daughter to go back to sleep. Her cries continued, but soon tapered off. Danny and Lindsay grinned at each other. Danny wasted no time in pulling Lindsay's wet, slick body against his own and kissed her thoroughly. However, a few minutes later their heavy make out session was interrupted as a pitiful, "Mom-eee," was heard.

The couple pulled apart. Taking a moment to calm her breathing, Lindsay rested her head against his shoulder. "Alright lover boy, your daughter calls," she said as she pulled away.

"What am I supposed to do about this?" Danny whined, indicating his erection, which seemed to be reaching out for her.

Lindsay smirked and lowering her voice said, "I can help you there Messer." She moved her hand down his body. Danny closed his eyes in anticipation. He felt her hand graze his hard cock, her fingers gently cup his balls, then move around his hip to pinch his ass. Danny bit his lip to keep from crying out as she pressed her body tightly against his, serving as a distraction when her hand left his body and reached out behind him. Danny's lust filled mind was too slow to process the sound of the turning knob until he felt the ice cold water hit his back.

He yelped in surprise while Lindsay laughed. She quickly jumped out of the shower and snatched a towel, calling out as she left the bathroom, "Enjoy your cold shower cowboy."

Danny laughed at his cheeky wife and turned off the water. He could still hear Lucy's fussing over the monitor, and realized Lindsay had left it in the bathroom. Danny wrapped one of the hastily grabbed towels around his waist and listened to his wife and daughter.

"Hey baby girl," she cooed.

"Mommy, Mom-eee," Lucy called out. Danny could picture her chubby arms reaching out.

"Are you ready to get up?" Lindsay questioned, engaging her small daughter.

"Des."

Danny heard the ruffling of clothes and knew that Lindsay had scooped up Lucy, while managing to keep her towel wrapped around her body.

"I have a surprise for you. Guess who's home," Lindsay teased their daughter, "Daddy! Yeah!"

"Dad-eee!" cheered Lucy.

Danny smiled at their enthusiasm, still awed by the love his girls poured out to him. Perhaps even more surprising to him was his ability to return that love. He had never believed it when he heard someone say their 'heart was full' but now he understood. He was devoted to the woman that was his wife, his best friend, lover, confidant, and companion. Her happiness had become more important that anyone else's, including his own. Now, his daughter only served to strengthen that love and devotion. A very grateful husband and father made his way out of the bathroom to find his two favorite girls and spend the rest of the day with them.

Ok, there it is, my second attempt at 'the sex.' Be honest...

Thanks for reading!!!