Author's Note: Soo I was talking about Creme Eggs with Anduria Trianys and naturally it led to Janto plot bunnies showing up just in time for Easter. Yes it's a bit weird and I apologise now if it means you'll never look at a Creme Egg in the same way again. But who doesn't love Janto Smut whatever the content?

Warnings: This is a smut fic. It is rated at the most adult rating I could find on . Expect to find HUGE amounts of smut in it. M/M smut to be precise. You don't like it? Read something else.

Disclaimer: Character aren't mine. And neither are the Creme Eggs actually. They're Iantos ;)

How Do You Eat Yours?

A Janto Smut Easter Special

Ianto Jones sat down on the sofa in the Hub. It was a Saturday night and Gwen was at home with Rhys. Jack was in his office and Ianto was taking a break from monitoring the Rift activity. He was holding a purple and red box with a little yellow chick on it in his hand. Opening it, he extracted one of the six contents before placing the box on the floor, kicking it under the sofa to hide it.

He held the Creme Egg, studying the brightly coloured foil. He found a suitable place to start tearing it off and began to peal, trying unsuccessfully to get it off in one go. He crumpled the bits of foil in his hand into a small, compressed ball and placed it in his pocket. Neatly biting off the top of the chocolate egg, Ianto closed his lips around the chunk and savoured the taste of it in his mouth for a few seconds.

A soft sound could be heard from the next level. The sound of a door closing. Jack had left his office. Ianto didn't look up but knew Jack had stopped at the top of the stairs nearby and was now watching him. He was clearly trying to be subtle but Jack was about as subtle as a weevil in a china shop.

Ianto swallowed the chocolate which had been melting on his tongue. He curled his toes firmly in his shoes, the only place he could tense a body part without Jack noticing. He knew his lover was watching him and didn't want Jack to know that the audience was giving him pleasant tingles in a certain part of his anatomy.

Ianto carefully licked the chocolate crumbs on his lips, pretending he was merely cleaning them and nothing more. Out of the very corner of his eye, he saw Jack's hand grip the railings on the stairs and resisted the urge to smirk. His lips chocolate free, the Welshman dipped his supple tongue deep into the centre of the Cream Egg, forcing its contents to ooze slightly over the side of the chocolate shell. He savoured the sweet taste as he drew his tongue back out and into his mouth where he made sure Jack could tell he was sucking the contents off. Ianto took a moment to lick the escaping cream from the side of his treat, pouring all his concentration into his actions and not looking at Jack. He caught an uncomfortable movement on the stairs and felt a reaction in his trousers. Not yet, he chastised himself.

His tongue returned to the egg. Ianto wrapped his lips around the hole he had made in the tip of the shell and began to slowly and carefully suck out the gooey contents, his tongue helping to draw the sugary substance into his mouth. He closed his eyes and heard a quiet moan off to one side. He felt laughter bubble in his throat and found he couldn't continue without choking on the egg so he withdrew his tongue, made another show of licking his lips clean, placing a look of ecstasy on his face from the enjoyment of the sweet. He opened his eyes and pretended that he had only just noticed Jack standing nearby.

"Jack," Ianto said, keeping his tone light and casual. He couldn't help but swallow. He could see even from the sofa that Jack's eyes were dark from desire, his knuckles white from frustration where they gripped the railing. "I didn't see you there."

Jack looked stuck for what to say back. Ianto grinned. It wasn't often you saw the Captain stuck for words. He looked at the half eaten, half melted Cream Egg which was busy covering his hand in chocolate and offered it out towards Jack. "Do you want some? I think there's some cream left at the bottom if you want to..." he paused for effect, "lick it out." He smiled innocently at his words.

"I want to lick out something but it's not that damned egg," Jack growled. He began to descend the stairs and cross the floor, closing the gap between them. He paused briefly in front of his smiling lover before ducking his head and capturing Ianto's lips. The instant response from the Welshman confirmed his earlier suspicions than Ianto knew exactly what he was doing when he was practically giving oral to the Creme Egg. In fact, Jack was willing to go as far to suspect that Ianto had been planning this from the moment he bought the thing.

Jack tongue parted Ianto's lips roughly and his hand went to the nape of his lover's neck. Ianto tasted like chocolate and sugar and Jack's brain offered the kinky suggestion that if he slowed down for five seconds, he could put the rest of the chocolate egg to use on other parts of Ianto's body. He grinned into the kiss causing Ianto to break it, panting slightly, and give him a quizzical look.

"I don't trust that look on your face," Ianto said, referring to the devious grin on his lover's face. "What are you thinking about? And how can I stop you from thinking about it?" He reached out to run his fingers lightly up the inside of Jack's leg. Jack's eyes fluttered shut and a hiss escaped his lips as Ianto's delicate fingers danced teasingly over the bump in his crotch.

"You'll like it," Jack promised, going against everything his body wanted as he pushed Ianto's hand away. He grinned, teasingly, his own hands on the move now. He lent back for another kiss, keeping one part of his mind on his plan. He felt Ianto's erection through his suit trousers and felt a shiver run through his body when Ianto moaned at the contact. He couldn't help but stroke Ianto through the material until his lover shifted uncomfortably from the pressure. They parted slightly, breathing hard and letting their foreheads press against each other. "Do you have any more Creme Eggs, other than the one which is melting in your hand?" Jack continued.

"Huh?" Ianto blinked then shifted away from Jack to divert his gaze to the mess in his hand. "Oh yeah... forgot about that. Oh well, shouldn't waste food." Before Jack could react, Ianto had lifted the gooey egg to his mouth and began to lick it off his skin, using powerful strokes of his tongue to pick up the larger chunks before depositing them in his mouth.

Jack watched Ianto's tongue and his mind instantly went to places that tongue would be better served. In distraction he turned his head and saw the edge of the Creme Egg box sticking out from under the sofa. He reached for it and found five more eggs inside. Before Ianto could stop him, he had a second one out and was unwrapping it. He turned the foil into a little bed for the egg and placed both carefully on the sofa next to Ianto. He then proceeded to kiss his lover silly until they were both moaning into the kiss. Jack's hand found Ianto's shirt buttons, undoing each one, stroking the skin underneath as it was revealed. At the same time, Ianto slid Jack's braces off his shoulders and was undoing his belt and trousers. Jack gasped into the kiss as he felt the vibrations from his zip tremble through his cock.

Before long, both men were fully naked, holding each other close and letting their fully engorged penis's rub against each other, creating all sorts of delicious friction.

"Jack," whispered Ianto. Jack's heart ached at the love in Ianto's voice and he stroked his partner's face as they stared into each other's eyes.

"Shhh," Jack whispered back, placing a feather light kiss on Ianto's lips, "I have a present for you."

"A present?" The question was out of Ianto's mouth before he saw Jack's hand pick up the Creme Egg from the sofa. He watched in weary curiosity as Jack placed the top half in his mouth and bit it clean off, being careful not to let the rest of the semi-liquid centre spill out. Jack swallowed what was in his mouth and licked his lips. Ianto watched the action, realising just how cruel he was being to Jack earlier when he did the exact same motion. Before Ianto could object, Jack carefully pushed the remaining half of the Creme Egg over the tip of Ianto's erect cock. It was cool and goosebumps rose on Ianto's flesh. He was feeling far from sexy and just looked at Jack, unimpressed.

"Trust me," Jack told him before lowering himself to his knees and spreading Ianto's legs with care.

Ianto opened his mouth to respond but didn't get anywhere near making a coherent word when Jack began to show what he meant to do with the Creme Egg. Jack ran his tongue up the length of his lover's cock, his heart speeding up when he heard Ianto's pleasured gasps. He removed the excess cream expertly, teasing the skin around the chocolate egg. Ianto whimpered and Jack felt fingers tighten on his hair. With expert care, Jack closed his teeth around the rounded end of the Creme Egg. He bit into it slowly, keeping Ianto's attention diverted by stroking the skin around his balls, teasing the sensitive area. To Jack's amusement, the top (or was it bottom?) of the chocolate treat broke away and slid off easily. The heat of Ianto's cock was melting it. He would have to be quick. Jack swallowed the chocolate and went straight for the real treat. His tongue slid into the gap where the tip of Ianto's cock was showing through. He began to clean it with his tongue, licking and soothing the hot sticky skin. Pre-cum was mixing with the sugar to create a divine taste which was making Jack feel light headed. He couldn't help himself as he reached down to his own throbbing member and began to stroke it, relieving some of his tension.

Ianto's hand gripped the edge of the sofa until his knuckles turned white. Jack's tongue was so light it was driving him wild. He could feel its movements, accompanied by the tickle of Jack's hot breath over his skin. His body hummed with sexual energy and he widened his legs hoping it would make Jack just take him whole.

Jack took the hint and slid his lips over Ianto's cock. He began to suck the chocolate and sweet cream off his lover and Ianto groaned out as his senses overloaded. He could feel Jack's tongue lick off any remaining Creme Egg and it drove him wild. Then Jack stopped and removed his mouth, running his tongue one final time over Ianto's pre-cum soaked head before lifting his head.

"Ready?" Jack almost purred, stroking the highly sensitive skin around Ianto's balls. He smiled at his Welsh lover shivered. Which was why he was slightly puzzled when Ianto gasped out "no." He raised an eyebrow, letting his finger tease the base of Ianto's cock. "Are you sure?" Jack murmured, lowering his head teasingly again.

"There's something I want to show you," Ianto got his voice under control.

"I think I've already seen everything, Ianto," Jack smirked.

"Swop with me," Ianto said, reaching down to cup Jack's chin and encourage him to stand up. He also rose until their cock's bumped and they both groaned at the heated contact. They swopped positions, sneaking in several heated kisses as they did. Their sweat soaked bodies had clicked together like magnets as their lips sort out each other. Then Ianto gently pushed Jack backwards so he was the one on the sofa and he reluctantly broke the kiss.

Kneeling on the floor, Ianto reached for the abandoned box of Creme Eggs and selected one at random. Unwrapping the foil and discarding it, he mimicked Jack's earlier actions as he bit off the top of the egg and swallowed it, leaving him with a chocolate cup full of yellow and white cream.

Ianto slid his fingers inside the Creme Egg, taking a moment to briefly wonder what Mr Cadbury would think about what he was about to do. He scooped out the thick centre and discarded the chocolate shell on the floor. Jack was watching him in quiet wonder. Ianto could read his expression like a book. Jack could see where Ianto was going and it excited him. The Welshman didn't hold back. Ianto pushed his cream covered fingers slightly into Jack's hole, gently pushing against the tightness. He bit his lip as his cock ached in time to Jack's moans. He pulled them out to Jack's protest, gave the immortal a second or two to calm down and then he ducked his head between Jacks legs. His tongue found the sweet trail he had left for himself. It led down from Jack's stiff cock, over his perineum and right down to his tight anus. Jack's cries echoed in his ears and Ianto had to place one hand on Jack's stomach to keep his lover from bucking too harshly. He sort out the sugar substance inside, his tongue pushing in and drawing out what was once the centre of an innocent Creme Egg.

"Ianto! My god! Just fuck me already," Jack cried out as his lover's tongue teased his hole mercilessly. He could feel it licking, pushing, pulling. Going so close to his sweet spot but not quite reaching it. He was ready to explode. Why did he engage Ianto in a Creme Egg sex war? Ianto had a smart brain and a devious side which was covered oh-so-innocently by his neat suited exterior. But Jack knew what he was like when the other's had gone home. The man was going to kill him. Pleasure overload. Death by sex. "Ianto," he whimpered as his lover's tongue swirling around his hole, removing all traces of the sticky Creme Egg.

"What do you want, Jack?" Ianto's voice was a low growl, his desire clear in his words.

"You," the word was simple, to the point and so full of need that Ianto said nothing else. he stood up and slid his hands over Jack's thigh's. He positioned himself at Jack's entrance and with one look from his lover, slowly pushed inwards, using his saliva and what was left of the now heated sugary cream as a lubricant. Jack's groan as he pushed himself all the way in vibrated through the man's body and up into Ianto's. He closed his eyes and his grip on Jack's legs tightened. He began to thrust in and out, slowly at first then picking up the pace until they were both panting.

Without warning, Ianto struck Jack's sweet spot and Jack cried out in pleasure. He reached down and took one of Ianto's hands from his leg and placed it over his seeping cock. Together they began to stroke Jack's member, matching Ianto's rhythm. With both pleasure centres completely assaulted, Jack knew he wouldn't last. He felt his muscles start to tighten and tingles raced down his body. He began to pump his hips in time to Ianto and whimpers punctuated each breath. Then everything exploded.

"Oh dear god IANTO!" Jack cried out his lover's name as he came to an Earth shattering climax. Aftershocks rocked his body as Ianto didn't let up his pace for several seconds until he too climaxed, closing his eyes and throwing back his head as his muscles spasmed in ecstasy. Ianto leaned forward and rested his forehead against Jack's snatching a kiss between pants. They stayed there for a minute, sharing each other's afterglow. Then Ianto slipped out of Jack and moved to sit next to him on the sofa, where their fingers automatically intertwined.

"So, Jack," Ianto began, turning to face his lover, unable to keep the silly grin from his face, "how do you eat yours?"

Have a very Happy Easter everyone :) Kal x