Dear Naruto,

Too bad you took all of it when you left me.

First of all, I never really believed the lamb fell in love with the lion. What type of suicidal lamb would do that? It was more like an antelope fell in awe with a cheetah.

Not as beautiful as Twilight puts it, but it's true. An antelope is strong, powerful, and fast. She can get away with a sudden swiftness, so that before the cheetah realizes what has happened she is gone. But she doesn't leave. She doesn't want to.

She can't.

The cheetah is so powerful and mesmerizing that she can't take her eyes off him. She tries to, God knows she tries, but they're glued to him.

He's amazing. He's fearless. His presence is authoritative and compelling. He's strong.

He's dangerous.

That is what's keeping her there. The shear knowing that any minute he could attack her, but he doesn't.

Why doesn't the lion attack the antelope?

I think that's the better question here. We all know why girls fall in love with danger, and how they're stupid for falling.

But why doesn't danger attack? It should destroy this girl that's head over heels for it. Yet it waits it out and keeps her safe. It lets her watch, but not touch. It expects her to stay sweet and good in its presence, yet it'll be as terrifying as it wants.

It drives her to insanity.

Now, at this point in her life, she wished danger killed her. Or at least took her with for the ride.

Because here I am, writing a letter to a boy that doesn't love me. Here I am, crying over this paper, wishing I didn't love you either. Here I am, when I should be there, visiting you.

Here I am, wishing, and not doing.

If you took me with you, I would be ok. I wouldn't be alright, I know that, but I'd be better than this. I would rather be suffering in a rehab center, being miserable and having the heaves than being here.

Rehab centers can fix your addiction to drugs. They can cure you from your aliment, and get you on the right road to life. An addiction to drugs is at least semi- curable.

An addiction to you isn't.

You know, I read your letter about 6 times?

At first, I thought it was funny.

So, we're polar opposites. Let's compare us, shall we?

If you're stupid for getting into drugs, I'm stupid for getting into a druggie. If you're not good because you're into drugs, I must be terrible, because no matter what you say I did supply them to you. You'll relapse into drugs as soon as you get back out, I'll most definitely relapse back into you when you get back out. If you're destined to be in there, where does that leave me? Destined to wait out here for you. Your family's six feet under, but my family could be just as far away. They don't really care about me anyway. You have no one, and will live and die with no one. I have you, and will live and die without you.

I'm addicted to you.

Not so different now, are we?

Then your letter pissed me off.

You are not soulless, no matter what you say. Someone without a soul would have stolen from me that day, and they would still be here, stealing. They wouldn't realize how wrong they are; even if they grasped it three months after all of this happened. They wouldn't try to protect me from themselves, they would keep sucking me dry of every emotion I ever had.

I believe you have more of a soul than most people we know.

Then it made me sad.

"That's why I said what I said when we pulled away. I knew girls were suckers for those three words, and I needed you with my meth."

I've spent months trying to figure out what those three words meant.

Did you really love me? Did you really mean what you said? If you did mean it, what would become of us?

I spent weeks dreaming of our future. When you got out of rehab you would come to me and say those three words. How I'd keep you off of drugs, and we could form a normal life together.

Now I know what they meant to you.

Drugs.

I want to yell at you here. I want to ask if that's all you ever think about. I want to scream and tell you that you don't just say those three words if you don't mean them. I want to cry and yell and bawl and clamor and yelp and wine.

But what I'm going to do here is let it go.

I won't give you the privilege of seeing me at my worst again.

You've seen me at rock bottom enough times, I'm going to collect my last pieces of self worth and I'm not going to show you what I think of you and your drugs. You already know how I feel about your fix.

Yes, I said fix again. I'm not scared to say meth, I just choose not to. I'm choosing to say fix because it doesn't bother me as much as the word meth does.

It sounds unclean, and not worthy to be associated with you.

I already know that you're going to argue about that point too, but in my eyes you will always and forever be the boy I fell in love with, the boy before the meth.

I know this is absolutely besides this point, but do you have flashbacks of us before you got addicted? I have them everyday.

My fondest memory of you is your IPod.

I've always loved how music was the great connector of people. Even before the drugs you were something of a trouble maker and not the person parents want their kids around. I was the wallflower, who couldn't get out a sentence out without a stutter.

Yet, music connected us together, as if we were the same person, in the same situations. We could feel and taste and touch and see and struggle and understand each other's lives.

I've always liked your style of music. I liked the sweet sadness of the bass. The way the voice of the singer intertwined with the grief and melody of the guitar.

But what I liked the most about your IPod and its music is when you sang along it. You hit every note like you knew them for years, and sometimes your voice was like a melody to me. It was one harmony that always soothed my most irrational fears.

Do you remember that night on the roof? I don't blame you if you don't. It was most likely a nonentity in your life, something you could forget.

But I can let it go.

I came to your apartment in the middle of the night after I had a fight with my parents. Like always you didn't ask any questions, you just opened your door to me, and fell asleep on the sofa.

That's why I always went to your house. You would just invite me in, no questions asked. I'm not sure if it's because you didn't care, or if you thought I could handle my issues without people bugging me, or if it was because you knew that all I needed was silence.

Whatever it was, the thought of knowing that I wouldn't get any third degree made me keep coming back to you. You always could read me like an open book, and that's something I could never seem to do with you. I'm sorry I wasn't as good a friend as you were.

While you were sleeping, I walked to your bedroom and took my usual spot on your bed. But I couldn't sleep that night. All I could hear was my father's voice, repeating itself over and over and over and over and over again.

"You'll never amount to anything if you stay around that hoodlum friend of yours!"

This was an argument my father and I had often. He thought I was too good for you, and you were some common trouble maker, while I defended you, saying that there was nothing hoodlum- like about you.

Hoodlum. That was the word kept circulating around in my head.

You were not a hoodlum. He had it all wrong. A hoodlum commits crimes and can't go back. He doesn't want to; he craves every bit of the life he lives.

I don't believe you ever wanted to be the way you are, I think it just happened. The fix made you crave it. It made you live the life you led, and I know every part of you wanted to break free from it, to start over.

You just didn't know how.

I tossed and turned over this, and after a while I gave up on sleep completely. I silently walked past your resting place and made a beeline to the window. I jumped on that roof as fast as I could and sat and stared at the night time sky.

The stars were always prettier on your roof. I never figured out why they calmed me more when I was at your house than when I was at mine. I think it was because you were near me and that your presence soothed me. No matter where we were or what we were doing, as long as I was by your side I knew I was going to be ok.

I was so enthralled by the night time sky that I didn't notice you were next to me until you spoke.

You said how there was no sky without the stars. How they brought personality to the sky. How they put life to a dull canvas. Like salt on pepper. Like Fruit Loops to an empty bowl of milk.

That made me giggle and then you absentmindedly told me I was the Fruit Loops to your bowl of milk.

Of course, I blushed and returned my gaze to the stars.

A nice silence took over the air and I closed my eyes.

"'Cause you shine so bright, like those stars above me. And I'd give it all just to lay one night in your arms,"

I think it was my mouth that those words escaped from, yet I didn't take it back. I wasn't confessing anything to you that night, the song just popped into my head and I let it flow from my lips.

You remember that's my favorite song from your IPod, right? I can't believe you had a song based around a book on your IPod, and what was funnier was I had to point that out to you, or else you would never know.

That book is so relatable to us. I'm Gatsby and you're Daisy. I just hope that we can rewrite the book, and the ending. The one thing is, I can't find out who Tom is.

You smiled and me and sang the next line. I shivered at the softness in your voice, and scooted closer to you.

You put your arm around and we sat there and silently sang the chorus.

"And I swear I'd give my life just to set you free, I don't think you understand, Daisy, you mean the world to me."

Never have truer words been spoken.

Love you forever,

Hinata

I know the rift between her talking about meth and then going to a flashback was weird, but I needed it. See, the person who i based naruto off of, Ethan, is missing. His parents can't find him and i dont know where he is. And i noticed that this story is focused on how drugs are bad(which they are) and how they fucked these two up, but before drug.. God BEFORE drugs, when you have a normal friendship. it's wonderful, and right now i wanna think about ethan's good times, not his bad. because i don't know what's up with him, and if i never see him again, i'd rather remember the good times. When he enchanted me.

Edited while listening to Daisy's Lullaby (The Great Gatsby Rap) by Will Thwaites.
Yes, it's a song about the book The Great Gatsbsong. And it's also the song they sing in this chapter, if you've read the book, you have to listen to it, even if you didn't like it. This is the sweetest song ever.