for Schermionie
Disclaimer- title belongs to Owl City's "Dear Vienna"..... "I regarded the world as such a sad sight, until I viewed it in black and white."
until i viewed the world in black and white
And maybe it's because when Colin died, the world lost its color; lost its beauty. But Dennis hates cameras, hates capturing time when there never was enough, hates the endless memories of Colin snapping pictures, laughing, living.
Yet people expect him to know what to do when they shove a camera in his direction and ask him to take pictures of the survivors at the bleak memorial service. They expect him to capture the blend of grief and hope on the survivors' scarred faces; they expect him to expertly take in the contrast of life and death; they expect him to be Colin. And he can't, he just can't, and Dennis backs away from the camera, shaking his head wildly, because it's too soon, and it's not his passion, and if Colin was here, he'd punch him for even considering taking over Colin's job as photographer.
He can't take any pictures, he can't even hold a camera without wanting to cry, or scream, or break the stupid thing. And he doesn't know how it happens, but somehow, he's snatched up a scrap piece of paper and a nubby pencil, and has begun frantically sketching out the scene before him, the pencil flying across the paper, drawing the scars and the injuries, but also the hope and the life.
When he's done, the picture doesn't move, nor does it shine with the real-time emotions on the survivors' faces. It's not as moving as one of Colin's photographs, it's just a rough sketch, and Dennis doesn't even know why he drew it.
But he's happy for the first time in Merlin-knows-how-long, and maybe it's not capturing a split-second of time, but it's capturing what's important, and maybe that's enough.
Dennis looks down at his paper and sees the faint outline of his brother's face emerging, aided by his brisk pencil strokes. He feels familiar tears pricking at his eyes, but he smiles.