Hey CaityyCullenBlackLover here..wow..long name. Anyways. This isn't my first fanfic but it sure as hell feels like it. I actually like this one more than the other. I can only hope that you do too. Well, I'm writting this because I love Twilight.

Disclaimer:I do not own twilight or the characters in it, SM does. Im just a fan.

What the fuck did I just do?! What the fuck, Bella?!! What the fuck have I done?!!!!

How could I have just done that. It was bad, oh god, it was bad.

What about Edward? What the hell am I supposed to tell him? 'Oh by the way, I fucked your dad shortly after he picked me up from work today.'...Hell no! Not gonna happen. That'd make me seem like a slut, right? Holy mother of shit! How stupid am I? I didn't think!I should've thought!

I looked over at Carlisle, who was staring at the road intently. He must be thinking about what we just did. The expression on his face could tell you what he was thinking. It's always like that with him. What I don't get is how we even got to having sex in the first place.

Okay...flashback.

He just picked me up, at five o'clock. Which really suprised me because I thought that Alice was going to be picking me up that day. When I got into the car, he gave me this sexy smile and that was it. I got hot, I could feel my panties get moister by the second. The way his hair look, the way his black shirt hugged his chiseled chest, the way I could see the outline of his dick...oh by the way...it was huge, the sound of his car...oh was too much. Damn...my panties were getting wet as fuck.

He had to have smelled my arousal, cause next thing I know he's growling "Bella, do you like what your seeing?" Thats when he finally looked at me, his beautiful golden eyes were clouded with...lust? "Actually, yes." I looked him in the eye and replied in my most sexy voice, that I by the way, didn't know I had.

"Damn it!" He said before pulling over, inbetween some trees. "You asked for this Bella." That was all he said, before he attacked my lips. My hands started doing things of their own, feeling his chest, gripping on his neck, tangling my fingers in his soft hair. His lips felt so good against mine. Then out of no where, I feel his tounge licking, more like tracing my lower lip. In reaction to that I part my lips, giving him the entrance he wants. Our tounges collided. And when they did it was heaven! Pulling away for air, hurt me.

God, Edward had never kissed me that way!

Next thing I know, I'm on Carlisle, attacking him, feeling him all over, unzipping his pants. I reached low in that precious area and grabbed his length. He moaned. And I loved the sound, so I started to stroke him, then for a moment, rubbed the head where I could feel little drops of his cum accumilating, already. God, if anything can make me hotter, is Carlisle's dick cause now there's more liquid leaving my body. Making my panties even wetter, if thats possible. Damn, they must have been soaked. "Condom" I murmer into his neck, that I'm sucking on, trying hard as hell to leave a hickey. He reaches to the glove department to get one. I take it from him, rip it open with my teeth(earning a very sexy growl/moan from him). I rolled the condom on and that was it. I started ridding him with my skirt pushed up to my hips, my panties in his pocket because he wanted to remember how wet he got me and how wet edwards never gonna get me(wow, never thought of carlisle as the competitive type), his pants pulled down just enough for his dick to emerge. Hear my moans mixed in with his only made me that much closer to reaching my climax. And damn, did I mention how hard he was? God he felt so good in me.

After that I was sitting quietly thinking about what I should've been thinking about. Why I didn't think about it while it was happening, better yet, before it was happening is beyond my knowledge. I've made the biggest mistake of my life...I think. I mean, it may be bad, really bad. But what if this was supposed to have happened...What if Alice had saw it was going to happen and made Carlisle pick me up. Well, that may be true, but does that really give me any right to have done what I just did?

No...yes...no!Bella...it doesn't give you any right. It was wrong as hell but it felt so good, it felt so right.

"Bella, don't think about it, I won't think about it...so don't think about it." I hear Carlisle's, angelic voice, pulling me from my thoughts. I looked over at him, trying to hide my feelings because no matter how bad it was what we just did, I wasn't about to bring myself to regret it. I liked it. No. I loved it. I loved Carlisle?

"But Carlisle, I want to think about it." I said, looking out the window, avoiding eye contact was always best when I was about to cry or crying. Avoiding eye contact at moments like that made me feel like I wasn't that weak, just a little.

"Don't cry, my love. Please don't cry." I looked over at him, eyes filled with tears. If he hadn't said anything about crying, I wouldn't be crying.

"Look, I don't regret what we just did if thats what your thinking. I just don't think we should let anyone know, yet." He smiled at me, making me not worry about anything else, just about how exactly I deserved somebody like Dr. Carlisle Cullen. He was just too good for me, no one like me could ever deserve him.

"Okay" Was all I could say. Still some what dazzeled by his smile, I guess. Is it even possible that he's Hotter, Sexier, Smarter, well, lets just say "a whole lot better" than Edward.

He leaned over the seat and gave me a chaste kiss. That eventually turned into something more but had to be broken again, for air and for the sake of our lives. Because I doubt that he can concentrate on two things fully, at once. I know I can't.

"I love you, Bella." He said, staring me strait in the eyes.

What am I supposed to tell him?Do I love him? Oh god, what do I say?

He turned his face and looked intently on the road. He seemed a little fustrated. "its okay, if you don't-" I cut him off with a kiss, then pulled back.

Like I was gonna let him think the worst of things. I may or may not love him but I'm not about to let him think I don't have some feelings for him-no matter how weird those feelings may be.

Just say it...It doesn't matter if you don't mean it, people say it all the time and not mean it. Just say it.

"I love you, Carlisle"