Witch's thoughts: in the end, finally, the last chapter! I could talk for hours how much pain it gave me, how many times I've rewritten it and changed arrangement of events... but oh well, who cares about that^^'

I would like to give my sincere thanks to Rhea1305, my wonderful beta who sacrificed a lot of her precious time to check my writings so that your eyes won't be abused by my mistakes anymore^^ thanks to her I managed to finish the story! thank you very much! :bows:

also, I want to thank FelesMagica, who accompanied me in the process of writing Troubles and was sending constant encouragement which allowed me to overcome writer's block when it occured^^ also, she gave me some ideas, which I'm most grateful for. thank you very much! :bows:

then, many many warm thanks for all my reviewers! I'm happy that you liked the story enough to spare some of your valuable time to leave a few words that would encourage me to continue^^ I treasure all and every review a lot!last, but not least, thanks to all my readers! thanks for staying so long with me! :)

IMPORTANT BEFORE READING:

some plot issues: here, Obi-Wan is 23, so accordingly, all characters you know are younger as well. Anakin is 7 and Padme is 12, not a Queen yet. this is my vision of how Naboo mission turned out, and here, we have Queen Mystovic^^ just to not confuse anyone.

some explanation of abbreviations used:

MIA - Missing In Action

KIA - Killed In Action

ICU - Intensive Care Unit

what's more, this chapter has warning: character death and insanity. please have it in mind. if someone is disturbed by these themes, mail me and I'll up the rating to M.

enjoy:)

EDIT (10.01.11) because there was some confusion, I wanted to precise some things: the last part written in intalics belongs to Shakti, not Qui-Gon.

"We have the connection, Ma'am." a Nubian soldier saluted Quella, who was sitting in the corridor impatiently tapping her foot on the floor. The woman jumped from her chair, at the same time hissing painfully. Then, holding her sides, she hobbled inside the conference room.

It was dark in there and the projectors were already set up as she had ordered. Taking a deep, calming breath, Quella put her hood on, shading and hiding her face in even deeper shadow. She waited, nervously and seconds later, the dials lit up with holograms, encircling the woman with faint, bluish light emitting from projected figures.

The Jedi Council had granted an audience for Jedi Knight Quella Alberona.

She bowed, slowly and carefully, as if not sure if she would be able to straighten again. They waited; she didn't speak either. The silence was prolonged and awkward but at the same time full of unpleasant surprise emanating from Councillors.

"Why are you the only one to report to the Council? What happened Knight Alberona?" The clearly worried voice of Depa Bilaba cut through the air like a sword, making all the people present in the room, twitch. Quella straightened even further, her back uncomfortably tense, when she hid her hands in sleeves of her robe.

"I am the only one able to report to the Council, Master Bilaba." Knight's voice was flat and expressionless, her lips moving and forming words, but they had no meaning, no emotion within them.

"My partner, Master Qui-Gon Jinn, is hospitalised and on the verge of death; my Padawan, Shakti Aumeros, is exhausted to the point of being comatose and hospitalised as well; Master Jinn's Padawan, Obi-Wan Kenobi, is currently nowhere to be found and has received a status of MIA."

Gasps of astonishment could be heard all over, as some of the Councillors leaned forward in their chairs, talking all at the same time and causing the room to fill with the agitated buzz of conversation. The Knight remained calmly indifferent; her face still hidden in the shadow under her hood, she didn't even move from the spot she was standing on. Finally, Master Windu managed to somehow overcome the effect of what the woman had said, by hitting the armrest of his chair with his fist signalling for everybody else to quiet down as he wanted to speak. The Councillors focused on the Knight again.

"That sounds serious, Knight Alberona." Mace nearly barked at the woman, his temper barely kept under control after hearing that one of his friends nearly ended up as a corpse. "Tell us, what happened."

The woman gritted her teeth visibly, but surprisingly didn't say anything rude, as some had expected her to. Instead, she seemed to be gathering her wits, before speaking. As she looked a little unsure, Mace decided to help her, as he wanted to get it over with as quickly as possible, with the ulterior motive of gaining some time to get information about his friend's state.

"We received Master Jinn's report about your activities on your first trip to Naboo as well as about your problems with ship and a necessity to land on Tatooine. What made me think was, how did you come to have the boy with you?"

The woman sighed.

/

"Wait!"

The two Jedi stopped and looked back, only to see the Captain with some girl, approaching them. Quella moaned.

"The Queen wishes you to take her handmaid with you."

"It's not a good idea." Qui-Gon was displeased; it was obvious that he would like to refuse taking the girl with them. Quella understood him well, she had already been on Tatooine and knew what they should expect; not something a young girl would like to see or experience. Yet they didn't have any choice, as travelling with the Queen forced them to at least try and get along with her. After all, it was their idea to take her to Coruscant.

When the mind tricks didn't work on the junk dealer Watto, they found themselves on the street, wondering what to do. Qui-Gon tried contacting his Padawan, who had stayed with the ship, just to get him informed about a development of the situation.

"So, you're Queen Mystovic's handmaid?" Quella stood, leaning on the wall, waiting for her bond-mate to get the connection. The girl nodded shyly, somehow discouraged by woman's wild looks. Quella smiled.

"…alright, I hope we will find another solution. By the way, how is Shakti?"

"She is better Master, even though she still has trouble with breathing. Knight Alberona was right, that dryness of air is nearly killing her."

"Keep her inside and tell not to overwork herself. We will get back as soon as we can."

"Yes, Master"

The incident with Sebulba made them again meet that boy from merchant's shop Anakin. Quella could feel that Qui-Gon was worried and she knew why he was; Obi-Wan had been left on the ship with the Queen and a sick girl. He had reason for it. Not that she was against Qui-Gon getting all "in love", but right now, they had another things to worry about, even excluding the young man who could handle things on his own just fine. Yet, she couldn't force herself to make Qui-Gon more focused.

On the other hand, that Padme girl was really getting along with slave boy. They were close in age, even if the didn't look it… a girl of twelve in Queen's court? On second thought, why not? Quella liked how the girl smelled; she wore a faint scent of face powder and Queen's perfumes. And she behaved rather rationally.

Even so, her inexperience in normal matters, like trade, made her ridiculous as a companion for such a trip. But then again, if she was Queen's handmaid, she at least had to be good at observation. And that was what could be interesting...

/

"Anakin Skywalker was the one who enabled us to get the spare parts we were lacking to repair our ship." Quella decided that would be the best and safest statement. Not everything they did or had done would have to be mentioned to the Council, would it? She was quite sure that the race and bet, well, such things wouldn't make Councillors happy.

"These are the exact words from Jinn's report." said Master Yaddle, smiling a little, but her smile died when she turned to the Knight in the centre. "But how exactly were you able to judge that he was destined to be trained as a Jedi?"

Quella tried very hard to fight back a habit of hers to bite her lip in thought. It was a tricky question; she had to be careful not to say more than necessary...

/

At night, when Shmi called Anakin to go inside and to bed, Quella chose to stand behind the wall, this way being able to hear everything that was going on in the terrace. The boy was dreamy; all that talk about seeing every planet in the universe and stuff, which little boys go over and over. But somehow, she liked his attitude. He was enthusiastic, which was a good sign for tomorrow's race. But what was this blood sample for? Oh yes, for infections. Yeah right.

Quella got so caught up into Qui-Gon's voice that she didn't notice that Shmi called Anakin again. The boy said good night and disappeared in his room, passing by her, even if he didn't notice that. She had to smile, as she didn't know why, but the boy made her heart feel warm. Shakti was her Padawan and the one she took care of, but even so by looking at her Quella still was reminded of her planet. Not pleasant thought.

But Anakin, this boy was just like a living star…She felt as if he was shining somehow.

She could not have her own child. Not as a Shairaani, not even as a Jedi. It was alright though, she was not alone: she still had Qui-Gon by her side…

"Obi-Wan?"

"Yes, Master?"

Hearing their voices, quiet, warm, containing a need to see, touch each other, made her shiver unconsciously. Quella didn't want to be left out, but at the same time she was well aware that this was what awaited her. Somehow at the end of the talk they had surely reached the issue of boy's blood sample, but when Quella was walking away, quiet so she was not discovered, she could just hear sweet whispers of separated lovers.

/

No, there was no way she would tell them that! Not now, not when everything seemed to finally fall into place. These old fogies would surely do something stupid, like force Kenobi and Qui-Gon to choose between themselves and the Order and she couldn't let that happen. She didn't care about the Kenobi kid; okay maybe a little, after all she forced him to promise that he wouldn't make a move on his Master before his knighting ceremony or at least before he was announced, again, to be able to take his trials, so indirectly she was responsible for their separation. But, as much as she wanted Qui-Gon to be happy, she couldn't ignore the fact that Kenobi wasn't ready. He still wasn't ready for a man like Qui-Gon and she wasn't sure if he would ever be, but taking into consideration the circumstances, she allowed them to... okay, another bad phrase, she couldn't allow or forbid them anything. It's just, someone had to look after things to get everything to turn out the right way. Didn't they? And she did just that, ensuring that both Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan were as ready as they would ever be. With all that stupid hunt for a Jedi, they couldn't know if all of them would meet ever again, after some missions, some of them could return injured or be killed. There was no time.

Quella stirred and moved in her memory a few minutes back to remember what the Councillors asked her.

"Blood sample. I guess that Master Jinn enclosed the data about boy's blood count?"

"Indeed. And that was the base of taking the boy to Coruscant?" asked Master Unduli, observing the Knight with attention, as if trying to penetrate her hood and see what was beneath. Quella instinctively put it even further on her face.

"This and Anakin's unusual abilities such as being able to sense other people's emotions and signatures. Seeing a few seconds ahead of the moment. Uncommon reflexes for a human. Master Jinn decided that the boy deserved a chance to at least stand before the Council."

"I see." Mace said. His hologram and some rustling indicated that the man was looking through a paper version of the report. "Then, there is a mention of some stranger that attacked you..."

"Oh yes." Quella couldn't help but hiss with annoyance. "The encounter with that strange man surprised me. When we were going back to the ship after taking the boy with us, being near the machine and our people, I didn't expect anything dangerous. But when Qui-Gon yelled "Anakin, Quella, DROP!" I'd found myself in the sand even before I could think about it. The men started to fight, and I only got out of there because someone had to save the kid."

"Do you know who that stranger was?"

A split of second of hesitation flashed through her face and feeling that, she could just wish it wasn't visible for the Councillors.

"I do not."

"Then, the report mentions that you reached Coruscant" Mace looked at the woman from over the paper that he was reading. "I won't ask you why you went to the Archives when Master Jinn with Padawan Kenobi and Skywalker were questioned by the Council, I won't ask you why you looked for classified information about Zabraks, I won't ask you what you have done with it." his speech was met with angry baring of fangs, but otherwise Quella said nothing, as there was nothing she could say to that.

The Councillor continued, "What I will ask you is what happened when you arrived on Naboo for the second time."

Quella felt a shiver run down her spine. Now came the time to remember the worst.

Under her hood, she closed her eyes and let her memory guide her. She saw the ship again; once more she was travelling to Naboo with Qui-Gon and their Padawans two days ago...

/

I couldn't believe we were going on Naboo again. Who cared about that planet! Apparently, Qui-Gon did. And that was what worried me.

I didn't sleep well on the trip to the planet and had had enough of people going around and saying patriotic-like crap. If I wasn't as rational as I was, I would say I had a bad feeling. A really bad feeling.

Before we managed to meet with Gungan leader, the Queen Mystovic got shot. The journey would be troublesome with an injured woman, so we had to leave her by the ship, continuing by ourselves. And what surprised me, was the role of the handmaid, Padme. She got the Queen's outfit and played her role, just to fulfil the requirements to create an alliance with Gungans. I was impressed and wouldn't be surprised if Padme was chosen to be another Queen of Naboo… but there was no time to think about that then.

When we entered the palace, at first everything went well. The distraction pulled the majority of the droids away and we were able to get further in without much effort. But, troubles started when we encountered the attacker from Tatooine. The one with the red lightsaber.

"We will handle this" I heard Qui-Gon said. I stepped just after him, ready to cover him, when he told me to join Padme, not even looking at me.

"Qui-Gon…"

"Help Padme, Quella! She may need you!"

For a tenth of a second I felt terrified, for some reason. Was I useless to him? But then, the rational part of my mind agreed with him and I gathered Shakti to follow the handmaid's group. I just saw that both Qui-Gon and Kenobi shed their robes, preparing for battle and that was all, we entered different corridor. They vanished from my sight.

There was no time. Encountering another squad of the droids that remained, was a pain in the neck, so I gestured my Padawan, who was hiding on the opposite side, to step up with me. Before Padme could stop us, we jumped to the centre of the corridor, concentrating their fire on us.

"Go forward, Padme!" I yelled over the buzzing of our swords. The girl was smart enough to take the chance, leading her group straight to the room where Viceroy of Trade Federation should be. Having destroyed all the droids, we followed, but my mind was still occupied somewhere else. I didn't know what was going on, why my bonds were going crazy, I felt hot and my hands became sweaty for some reason. I had to adjust the grip on my saber over and over. What the hell was going on?

I looked around, my heart was beating too fast and too irregularly, even when another group of Destroyers encircled us, I spared them little thought. My Padawan, who quickly found herself in the middle of the battle, now retained her cold blood and hid her lightsaber in her sleeve. I didn't have to do that, my 'saber would fly to me wherever I choose to put it, so there was no need to keep it with me... anyway, what was that painful tickling I felt in my wrists? As if I'd overworked my arms...

The second group managed to distract the droids, so our soldiers had a chance to take Viceroy hostage. Or so it seemed, as I couldn't focus on anything for any longer than necessary. My breath became laboured, even though I hadn't overexerted myself particularly. I could see that Shakti was observing me from behind, frowning; she wasn't used to seeing me panting and weary. But I couldn't help it, my bond was driving me crazy, draining the energy right from me. I felt as if drowning.

A burning pain in my chest caused me to yelp in surprise, more than from suffering, when my knees gave out and I fell onto the floor.

I could hear my Padawan running to me, could feel the Captain supporting my back with his arm. For a second, I felt calm. At peace. There was quiet and dark and for a moment, I floated between reality and loosing consciousness... then, the sharp pain came back, as if someone was drawing back sword from the wound, setting my body on fire. I screamed, I know I did. It hurt so much that I regained control over my limp body and straightened up.

"Master, what happened? Why are you injured?" Shakti reached me with scared shout, trying to get to my chest, while a dark, wet spot in the front of my tunic was getting bigger with every second passing. I found her hand, using it to support myself and get up.

"Master" she pleaded, seeing that I wanted to go somewhere "please, let me heal you first!" she even tried to prevent me from standing up, but I was already on my feet. The pain nearly caused me to collapse again, but I endured it... the meaning of such wound was too great for me to ignore it, I was needed somewhere else! I made a step forward,

"Master, your wound is bad, I have to close it!" Shakti begged, but I remained deaf to her pleading, breaking free from Captain's hold.

"I will live, Padawan!" I barked back, with all my remaining energy concentrating on restoring the wounded tissue "but he may not! I have to find Qui-Gon!"

Judging by her gasp when she followed me, I guessed she finally understood. Her soon-to-be bond with Kenobi had the dominating attribute of 'emotion', while mine and Qui-Gon's was 'sense'. My wound was nothing compared to what my bond-mate was experiencing now; if I couldn't find him quickly, he was more than certainly going to die. Our bond could transfer the sensation of pain, or pleasure, through our nerves, halving the effect it would initially have on the bearer, but it could only process a limited amount of the impulses. Estimating by the size of the injury, Qui-Gon's heart was in direct danger, if it wasn't already hurt. I felt my blood running down my stomach and coughed, when my lungs weren't able to provide me with sufficient amount of the oxygen.

Shakti already outran me, directing her steps towards the area sealed with barriers. I fought back a need to lean on the wall, because I knew if I did that, I'd slide on the floor again, this time without a chance of standing up. My organism had already started the healing process, my skin was tingling from nerve impulses, as my brain checked what systems had been damaged. I would be as good as new in no time... but Qui-Gon wasn't of my species, he was deadly injured and could bleed to death if left alone and I had to find him...

No, that wasn't it. So what if I found him? I could do literally nothing to save him, I was not a healer! I got closer to the place where Qui-Gon was, from where I was sensing his fading Force signature, when the barriers shut again. It was enough; I fell to my knees once more, seeing the worst view of my life... the man I loved, cared for and would give my life away for, now was lying motionlessly on the floor in a pool of his own blood. My Padawan was already kneeling by his side, frantically feeling around to find bleeding veins and block the bleeding, her hands unconsciously finding best spots to start healing. She was focused exclusively on her patient, her attention didn't waver even with all this shouts and noise from near battle.

I gripped a handle of my 'saber even harder. That was it. I couldn't heal Qui-Gon or prevent something that had already happened, but I could at least make sure that Shakti wouldn't be interrupted while she was doing her healer's work.

Focusing on the third, smallest and weakest bond I had in my mind, I managed to locate Kenobi quite fast; my body moving forward even before my mind noticed the need to. He felt me approaching too, his mind flaring with rage, misery, pain and pure insanity. I shouted at him; he had to be composed and know what he was doing! Hitting in blind anger, that was not what I had taught him!

Qui-Gon's signature was still fading and even I found it hard to remain focused, but I knew we were at disadvantage, even two on one. The Zabrak could cut through us if he wanted to. With me wounded and Kenobi unnecessarily worked up, we had to overpower him and do it fast. I didn't have much energy left and from the defensive stance of the Sith I knew he was well aware of that. Even so, he backed off; trying to stalk us into exhaustion seemed as a good plan and I had to congratulate his fast thinking. However, that didn't mean I was going to allow him and push us aside as he pleased.

It was exhausting. I had to unite with a person other than Qui-Gon and in my weakened state it was a dangerous action in itself, but Kenobi was as good as I had regarded him. He managed to get a clear cut and wound the Zabrak, at the same time allowing me to disarm our enemy. Unfortunately, since we were dead tired and afraid for our loved one, the Sith had still some energy left: he escaped.

A sudden feeling of dread caused me and Kenobi to sharply draw in a breath. I felt my newly restored lung burn; I curled up into a ball, feeling hot tears coming down my cheeks.

Qui-Gon's pulse had stopped.

Kenobi stilled. His body went rigid and he slammed his shields up so fast, that I could only sense a faint hint of rising fury in him. It was already suppressed, but it didn't mean it was less dangerous. I knew what he wanted to do, his whole Force signature was pulsing with his intentions, his emotions, his need to go after the Zabrak. When he started to run, his movements were swift, light, without hesitation. I was too weak to stand up again, my chest hurt, I had trouble breathing and felt my blood running down my fingers as I held my injury, but even so, I yelled as loud as I could:

"Kenobi, no, don't do this! Come back! KENOBI!"

/

Quella shuddered at the memory. She clenched her fists in her sleeves, emerging from her remembrance of the incidents from two days ago. Her attention came back to present, where the holographic images awaited a continuation of her report.

"And what happened then?" Mace Windu gently steered her speech into direction they were most curious about. The woman thought for a second.

"I don't know. I passed out." she said slowly, as if considering what she should say next.

"But after I regained consciousness, I found that Padawan Kenobi had taken my ship "Moonstar" and gone after the Sith. In space, an explosion was seen and since then, the Nubian forces as well as the recently called JAF teams have been searching through the surrounding space and over the planet but to no avail. They gave Padawan Kenobi the status of MIA."

"One question, Knight Alberona," Yaddle cracked into her speech, looking directly at the Knight. "Can you please tell us how you were able to sense Padawan Kenobi's emotions? If I recall correctly, he is not your Padawan."

To their surprise, Quella smiled. Her lips barely visible from under her hood and in dim light of holographic projections, she turned to the image of Mace Windu.

"You haven't told them then?" she asked sweetly.

When the man didn't answer, but just looked at her with narrowed eyes, Quella turned to the rest of the Councillors, "I have been training Padawan Kenobi for about three years now. I established a bond between us with his agreement and on his will."

She reached to her hood and pulled it off her head. Some Councillors winced, seeing her pale face with black eye. Hiding her hands in her sleeves again, she straightened up, head high with small smile of self-satisfaction on her lips.

"How come? He is Master Jinn's Padawan!" Ki-Adi Mundi exclaimed, thumping his fist on the arm rest. The woman rolled her eyes in annoyance.

"As a Jedi Shadow, who was delegated to erase any trace of Sith from the universe, I have a right to chose my partner, or to train one that would match my skills." Quella stated with dignity, her voice flat and perfectly serene.

"As the only ones that would have been able to keep up with me were Knight Raksion, who couldn't be my partner because of his empathic skills, and Master Jinn, who was more of a diplomat than a spy, I had to chose someone myself. Padawan Kenobi displayed the desired level of skills. With my guidance, he performed well on our missions..."

"This was illegal!" Master Mundi nearly jumped from his chair. Quella eyed him coldly.

"No, it was not. She got my permission." Mace Windu was the one who decided to deal with the other Master. Everybody looked at him; the dark-skinned Councillor pinched the bridge of his nose in tired gesture.

"More importantly, what about Master Jinn?" asked Master Unduli. "You said his heartbeat stopped, but earlier you stated that he was hospitalised."

"Oh, that." Quella turned to the female Master "My Padawan managed to restore all the important tissues, enabling Master Jinn to hang on until the medical help arrived. Shakti put all her energy into healing him, including the reserve for her own vital functions and as a result she had to be hospitalised as well."

"And your injury?" Master Unduli didn't resign "Considering the severity of Master Jinn's state, shouldn't you be hospitalised as well? Or at least, put under observation?"

Quella looked at the Master for a moment, before answering, her voice calm and somehow cool.

"My race developed an ability that allows us to regenerate damaged tissues. With that kind of injury, I should be able to move freely in twenty six hours from now" she said, seriousness of her face strangely disturbing. "Of course, what is more important, my heart hadn't been hurt."

"Because the blade missed it?"

"No." Quella smiled, but it was a sad smile. "Because I have a heart on the right side of my body."

A noise from the corridor made her twitch nervously when the door hissed open, letting a ray of light through. An officer marched in, saluting.

"We received JAF report about the missing one, Ma'am."

His face grew serious.

/

A week later

'The ship with the Jedi involved in the "Naboo incident" landed on Coruscant some time ago. Healers from Temple immediately took care of those most injured, who, until now, had been placed into a healing coma. Considering the severity of their wounds, any more time spent without professional treatment would have result in serious complica-"

Main Healer Sen'ra Allu stopped typing the report when she heard frantic knocking on her door.

"Enter!" she sighed, unconsciously knowing that something bad happened yet again today.

"Healer Allu!" a young Midorian from ICU stepped inside, looking scared and exhausted at the same time.

"That girl from isolation ward went berserk again! What should we do?"

"Call her Master." Healer Allu was tired as well. She knew who the girl was and why she had to be isolated – she was one of the two victims of the infamous "Naboo incident". Due to her race's physiology, she couldn't be put into a bacta tank; there were some psychological trouble as well. After healing her body, the girl was to be transported into Soul Healer's Ward, to Ozani Khak, and Healer Allu would be very happy to do just that. However, treating the girl was impossible - she would attack anyone that entered her room, not caring whether it was a healer or an ordinary Jedi. Allu suspected post-traumatic stress disorder was the cause of her emotional behaviour, but nothing could be done now, except for sedating and treating her this way.

"Call her Master." She repeated, her voice more commanding. The young healer only blinked: panicked.

"But we can't find her!"

Allu sighed. This day had been hellishly long even without that rampaging girl. She pressed a button on her desk that connected her to the Temple's check point. The operator answered immediately.

"It's Head of the Healer's Ward, Sen'ra Allu. Please, find Knight Alberona for me."

/

For three days now, Quella had tried to ignore constant headaches she was experiencing, because of someone trying to get through her blocked bond. She knew exactly who the person was and why he was nagging her all the time mercilessly and yet, she dreaded every single thought about letting him in.

Quella slowly felt her sides. Her wounds had healed long ago, there was no sign of where the life-threatening injury that had once marred her chest. Even so, she could feel an uncomfortable itching every time she touched an area near her heart. That meant, her bond-mate was still in danger, still weak and defenceless. But alive.

Closing her eyes and gritting her teeth with much force, she decided. There was no more reason to delay it, no matter how unpleasant. Quella had made the Councillors promise that she would be the one to fulfil that duty. She hated herself for that now, but rationally, she still knew that it was the best way possible.

It was time to visit Qui-Gon.

Upon entering the Healer's Ward, she felt the sensation of somebody forcing contact with her mind, intensify. Qui-Gon had been trying to talk with her since the moment he regained full consciousness, woken up from anaesthesia after coming out of bacta tank, but Quella had skilfully ignored him. Or tried to; she could clearly feel his distress and frantic need to know what had happened to his loved ones. However, the problem was, she couldn't let him know, not when his state was still so fragile and unstable. The Healers had agreed with her – uncertainty, even great and straining is better than calmer depression.

No matter how much she felt her heart being ripped in pieces every time she experienced Qui-Gon's faltering signature.

He noticed her right away when she unlocked her bond. There were no words, only emotion, but so intense that Quella stumbled and had to support herself on the wall. Gathering her wits again turned out to be even harder than she imagined it to be, however, she clenched her fists and continued walking.

The Force near Qui-Gon's room nearly vibrated from nervous fluids. The healer that came out just looked at her with martyred eyes and walked away quickly, leaving them alone. Quella watched him for a moment, before unconsciously touching the door knob and walking in.

Qui-Gon was already sitting on his bed, but according to Sen'ra Allu, his hyperactivity was caused by all that painkillers and antibiotics injected into his circulation system. The effect would wear out after some time, but even now the man looked pale and sick, with a feverish glint in usually gentle eyes. Quella's heart clenched painfully when she noticed how much weight he had lost.

The silence that followed was heavy.

She stepped forward, at first a little unsure, but when he didn't say anything, she gained a little more courage. Looking at his face and feeling the bond with him, she understood the reason for silence and groaned, slapping herself mentally for not realizing it earlier.

"What happened?" she heard him saying, voice hoarse and pained, but deeply concerned. Quella was quite close to him now and after he lifted his hand to touch her face, she knew that he wasn't talking about Naboo. Yet.

However, this topic wasn't safe to talk about either.

"How do you feel?" she asked, catching his hand and stroking it with her fingers.

"Why are you so bruised?" he asked in return, not fooled and fully aware that she wanted to hide something from him. She winced and looked away.

His mind was wounded even more than his body and the biggest problem was that he wasn't even aware of that wound. She was. And she knew that when found out about it, the 'mental' bleeding would be much, much worse than physical damage. And yet…

"Shakti." She said quickly as if afraid that she wouldn't have strength to continue "Her bond is broken. She went insane and attacked me."

Qui-Gon didn't say anything, but she could see in his eyes that it hurt him deeply. Knowing that he loved the girl, treated her as his long awaited, dream-daughter, allowed her to estimate, how worried he was. Maybe he would forget to ask more; maybe he would be too occupied…

Qui-Gon closed his eyes and forced his breathing to calm down.

"What about Obi-Wan?" he asked so quietly that only due to her Jedi hearing was she able to hear him, "I can't feel him, Quella."

She said nothing, purposely not looking him in the eye, even though he sought the contact. When she finally started to speak, her voice was indifferent, calm, even if her insides were burning with a scared need to shut up and scram.

"He ran after the escaping enemy and was caught in a space explosion. After three days of searching for some clues, Nubian forces and JAF teams found some remains with his Force signature. His status was changed from MIA to confirmed KIA."

There was no answer to what she said, so she dared to look at him, at the same time grabbing tightly onto their bond, securing it and balancing. Just in time, as his signature searched out for hers nearly immediately.

A dead look in his eyes scared her.

"Qui-Gon… Key, please…" she began, already coming closer to touch him, but then he focused his stare on her. She stopped.

"Is that so." He said, serenely, calmly as if nothing happened. His shields came up, slowly as if he had to pick them up and build anew from shattered pieces. A raw, bleeding bundle of emotions was hidden securely behind the walls, making Quella lose sight of it, no matter how much she tried to remain inside his shields.

The atmosphere; the Force around the room became even heavier.

/

They are lying. I know they are. There is no way that could happen. I feel him. I can still feel him. They say my bond is broken, but that's not true. How could it be? I know he is alive; his heart beats along with mine. If mine is beating, how could his not? He is alive. I know it.

No matter what they say, I won't believe them. They are all liars. They want to separate us. Why? What have we done to them? Nothing! Nothing! Nothing… somebody wants to come in again. Do they want to sedate me? What for? I don't want to! Leave me alone! I don't want to hurt them; I really don't, but…

…come on, come in further…

/

Three years later

Shakti waved goodbye to the two Padawans she had just finished training with and sighed. It had really been a tiring day, with all the classes she had had to teach and duties in Healer's Ward. And to think it was only about midday…

"Shakti! Hey, Shakti!"

She turned around, only to be caught around the middle by a blonde restless being, that happily hugged her with affection.

"Are you free today? Let's play!"

"I'm sorry, Ani" Shakti smiled, but the boy was taken aback by the sadness on her usually cheerful face. "I have something to do today. Why don't you go and ask Master Jinn to give you something to do?"

The boy let her go, stepping back a little, only to look her up into her eyes. He'd gotten taller since they'd first met; now they were nearly the same height and that made it easier for him to talk with Shakti. However, she turned away.

"Master Jinn also said he is busy tonight… hey!" he eyed her with sudden suspicion "don't tell me it's that again? Come on Shakti, you can't mourn for him forever! It's been three years since he died!"

"I doesn't matter, Ani." Shakti still refused to look at him. The boy wanted to persuade her, to make her change her mind, but then, he felt a heavy hand on his shoulder. Looking back, he saw that Master Alberona shook her head, silently ordering him to stop talking.

"I'm going to get Anakin to train with me, Shakti" she said, loud and clear, with worried eyes watching girl's back. Shakti nodded, but didn't respond any other way.

"Well, we will be in the training area. Find us if you need something." Still no answer. The Master sighed and patted boy's shoulder. "Let's go, Ani."

Listening to their fading footsteps, Shakti leaned on the pillar, touching it's cool surface with her fevered forehead. Yes, today was the day. Tonight she was going to meditate over something that nearly caused her to do something unforgivable, something that could have ended her life. She moaned. Only a mere memory was setting her mind on fire, making her dig her nails into stone of the pillar, drawing out blood.

People hardly ever went down that particular corridor. No one would see her, as she slid powerlessly to the ground, her back trembling with inhibited sobs. No one could hear her, whispering to herself.

"I miss you… I miss you so much, Ben…"

Witch's thoughts:

THE END

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is it really? ;)

of course not! the sequel story is already being written, chapter 1 is ready to be posted^^ however, right now I'm entering busy period of my university exam session and unfortunately neither I or Rhea will have time to work on the second story. I should post the new one on the first of February, if you want to know when it will be posted exactly, put this story on alert. I'll post here a note where you can find the sequel. or, if you don't want it this way, just put me as an author on alert^^ either way is fine.

thank you for staying with me 'till the end! I hope you had as much fun reading my story as I had writing it:)

PersianWitch