A/N: well, this is a really silly little idea I had. It is an entry for a competition, and some of the prompts made my mind go in all sorts of weird directions. I tried not to go OOC, but I'm not sure how well I managed (I like to take Sasuke out of avenger mode, by the way, and I find he mellows when I do that) This is also my first try at third person omnipotent, so any reviews would be helpful.

This story contains graphic M/M sex. You have been warned

Disclaimer: All characters property of Kishimoto Masashi. I do not own Naruto, I just like making him have lots of sex with Sasuke

Naruto shot a venomous scowl at the man walking beside him. Sasuke continued looking straight ahead, but the smirk on his lips suggested that he could feel his lover's ire. Naruto clenched his fists; the whole thing had started innocuously enough, but had soon spiralled out of control. It had begun with Sasuke suggesting that they gamble for sexual favours, as a way of spicing up their love life. Naruto was not a gambler, but both Tsunade and Jiraiya had commented on his luck quite often in the past. Thinking of the things he could get Sasuke to do; Naruto readily agreed. However, when playing with Sasuke, whether it be cards, dice or even something simple like janken, he always lost. And as Naruto continued to lose, the bets became bigger; Naruto wouldn't quit, he would get his revenge the day Sasuke lost. What had started off as a fun game became deadly serious. They took it in turns to suggest what the looser had to do, the forfeit becoming more and more humiliating as the days progressed. Which was why, one month after their game had begun, Naruto found himself walking along the twilight streets of Konoha wearing a dress that they had borrowed from Tsunade. Naruto hoped that she didn't see them, they hadn't got around to telling her that they were borrowing the garment, and he did not relish the thought of the punishment the Hokage would inflict on them for rifling through her wardrobe. Although, on the plus side, their date would have to be cut short while they sought medical attention.

Naruto tugged at the dress with a gloomy sigh. It didn't exactly fit him; it gapped at the top, and was painfully tight around the waist. It was dark green, and calf length with a slit up one side and a very low cut back. Naruto couldn't imagine Tsunade wearing it. Well, he could, he just didn't particularly want to. He shot another glare at Sasuke, to find his dark eyes fixed on him, an amused glint sparkling in them.

"Ok, I've marched around Konoha looking like an idiot. Can we go home now?"

Sasuke smirked. "Well, the conditions were to go out on a date wearing a dress. I hardly call walking around the village a date; I thought we could go for a meal, maybe catch a movie afterwards."

Naruto felt his cheeks flushing from a mixture of shame and rage. "Sasuke, you know if I had won, I wouldn't have made you do all that. I would have made you a meal, and not forced you to leave the house."

Sasuke snorted, doubtful of that. "And I'm glad you didn't win. Having to eat your home cooked ramen is something I hope to never experience again. You should just enjoy the treat, Naruto-chan."

Naruto ground his teeth together; Sasuke was enjoying this far too much.

Sasuke smiled to himself, seeing how riled Naruto had become. Getting his lover pissed off had become something of a hobby for him; Naruto was fairly easy to get to, and the pay off was more than worth the bitching; an angry Naruto was, ultimately, a very passionate one. Still, he supposed that this game had gone on long enough; he wanted Naruto annoyed, not murderous. Besides, looking at Naruto in Tsunade's dress was possibly the most un-arousing thing ever, even with the amount of well toned leg and back it showed off. Sasuke was possibly as eager to get Naruto out of the dress as Naruto was himself. He scanned the street they were on, and saw a restaurant that also provided takeout meals. He grabbed Naruto's wrist.

"Come on, Naruko, we're going there," He said.

Naruto resisted for a moment, pulling against Sasuke "What did you just call me?"

Sasuke shot him a contrived innocent look. "I'm sorry, you're so pretty I thought you were a girl," he said.

Naruto shot him a very un-pretty scowl. "I'm going to make you pay for this," he said. "Be prepared; next time I will definitely win."

Sasuke smiled to himself, and lead Naruto into the restaurant. As soon as they had walked through the doors, Naruto saw something that made him give out a small sound of dismay. Sasuke followed his gaze, to see Team 8 and Team Gai sat around a large table. Sasuke understood Naruto's reaction. Random citizens of Konoha seeing him in a dress was bad enough, but these were his friends. An evil glint appeared in Sasuke's dark eyes. To get to the take out counter, they would need to go past the table where their friends sat. He tightened his grip on Naruto's wrist, and led him forward.

The prospect of further humiliation was too much for Naruto to take; he wrenched his arm away from Sasuke, and made a panicked hand seal. "Oiroke no Jutsu"

Suddenly, Naruto filled the dress very well. Sasuke stared in horror as his burly boyfriend was replaced by a slender, large breasted girl with two ridiculous pony tails set high on her head. He hated that Jutsu, it was far too creepy.

"Hey, Sasuke!" Sasuke flinched at Kiba's loud voice. He glanced over to the table where the six ninjas were now staring at him. Or to be exact, at Naruto. "Who's the girl?" Kiba asked.

Naruto felt a thrill of relief at not being recognised. That, and the look of dismay on Sasuke's face, prompted him to do something fairly evil. But justified, he felt. Placing a shy smile on his face, he approached the table, feeling Sasuke's glare pierce the back of his head.

"Hi, I'm…" what had Sasuke called him again? "Naruko," Naruto said as the name came to mind.

Kiba and Lee hurriedly introduced themselves, and scooted over to offer a seat between them. Naruto accepted, glancing at Sasuke through his long blonde eyelashes as the dark haired ninja slowly approached the table.

Neji glanced at Sasuke with raised eyebrows; his byakugan had recognised Naruto's chakra. As Shino and Tenten were also introduced to 'Naruko', Hinata glanced shyly into her lap, her cheeks red. Like her cousin, she had also recognised Naruto; she just hoped that no one realised that she found a female Naruto just as attractive as a male one. Sasuke sat down opposite Neji, glaring at Naruto as he proceeded to flirt outrageously with Lee and Kiba. Every so often he would let out a giggle that was probably supposed to be cute, but had the same effect on Sasuke as someone dragging their nails down a chalk board.

Tenten, sat next to Neji, attempted to defrost the atmosphere Sasuke was creating by saying the first thing that came to mind. "Well, Sasuke, I never expected to see you bringing a girl out on a date," she said.

"His date appears more interested in Kiba and Lee, so I wouldn't worry about you're shattered expectations too much," Neji murmured dryly, taking a sip of his drink. Sasuke contemplated murder.

A waitress appeared to take their order, and Sasuke found himself grinding his teeth as Naruto ordered the most expensive items on the menu. This was not going the way he had planned; having to watch Naruto as a girl flirt with other guys was high on his list of least favourite things ever. Tenten had decided to turn her attention to the group around Naruto, since Sasuke had responded to her with stony silence. Shino was also silently listening to Naruto simper, so Sasuke was left with a blushing Hinata, and Neji, who was wearing a small, smug smile on his face. He ignored the Hyuugas, and shot a glare at Naruto, who widened his blue eyes, before blowing Sasuke a kiss. Then Naruto purposefully turned back to Kiba, allowing the dog boy to toy with his long hair. Naruto let out another one of those awful giggles, and Sasuke suddenly felt the urge to slam a chidori in someone's face. He had had enough of this farce. He slammed his hands on the table, and rose to his feet, before snatching Naruto's hand out of Lee's, and dragging him away from the table.

"Hey, Sasuke," Naruto whined in his affected girly voice, "I haven't had my meal yet."

Sasuke ignored him, dragging him through the restaurant, towards the restrooms.

"Sasuke, I can't go in there, that's the men's room," Naruto said, purposefully loud enough to be heard by several people.

"Shut up," Sasuke hissed, dragging Naruto into the men's toilets and slamming him against the wall.

Now they were alone, Naruto's wide eyed girly persona slipped away. He smirked at Sasuke. "What's wrong?" he asked, "Jealous?"

"Change back," Sasuke demanded.

Naruto raised an eyebrow. "I don't want to," he said

"This wasn't part of the bet," Sasuke said through clenched teeth.

Naruto smiled. "Well, the bet was that I had to go on a date with you wearing a dress," he said. "There wasn't anything about not being able to use a henge."

"Naruto, I hate that Jutsu. I can't stand seeing you all…girly, it's really disturbing. Change back."

Naruto examined his nails for a long, slow moment. He was enjoying this; Sasuke had had all the fun for far too long; it was his turn to squirm. "If I change back, I'll have to walk through the restaurant in this stupid dress, so, no."

"Naruto, if you change back, I'll do whatever you want."

Both of them stared at each other for a long moment; Naruto couldn't believe that he had been given such an opportunity, Sasuke couldn't believe that he had actually said that.

A nasty grin spread on Naruto's face. "Ok." He said, "I'll change back if you wear the dress. And you can't use henge. And you have to wear a sign saying Naruto's sex toy. And-"

"One thing." Sasuke interrupted quickly, "I'll do one thing; it's only fair."

"Fine. Wear the dress; but the no henge rule still applies."

"Ok," Sasuke sighed; the humiliation of wearing the dress would be countered by the fact that when they left the men's room, Kiba and Lee would realise who it was they had been flirting with. Hopefully the sight of Uchiha Sasuke in a backless green number would pass them by. "Wait; change back before you take the dress off," he said quickly as Naruto began to fiddle with the zipper of the dress. Sasuke had gone all his life without seeing a naked female; the thought of nude female Naruto was not a pleasant one. Nude Naruto, though…Sasuke found himself grinning.

Sasuke waited until Naruto was back in his normal form, before pushing him into an empty cubicle and locking the door.

"Sasuke-" Naruto began, his words muffled as Sasuke pounced, covering Naruto's mouth in a lusty kiss. He supposed that getting irritated made him a bit passionate, too. He tugged down the zipper of the dress, letting the awful garment slide down to pool at Naruto's feet. That was better.

Naruto grabbed Sasuke's shoulders, and managed to push him away. "Sasuke, this is a public toilet, anyone could walk in," he said.

"I don't care. I've just had to watch you flirt with Lee and Kiba. I want you to remember who you belong to." Sasuke pushed Naruto up against the wall of the cubicle, and kissed him again. Naruto's hands slid from Sasuke's shoulders to wrap around his back, and his mouth opened into the kiss. Sasuke tangled his fingers into Naruto's blond hair, sliding his tongue into his lover's mouth. Naruto's hands trailed down Sasuke's back as they kissed, slipping under his shirt, digging into the warm flesh underneath. Sasuke moaned, and pressed himself against Naruto, pleased to feel the growing erection against his thigh. They broke the kiss long enough for Naruto to pull Sasuke's shirt over his head, then their lips locked again, tongues fiercely tangling together. Sasuke trailed his hands down Naruto's throat and naked chest, lightly brushing against his nipples. Naruto's hands gripped Sasuke's ass, and tugged him closer, the movement pressing their erections together. Sasuke released Naruto's mouth to let out a groan; he began to move his hips, creating a wonderful friction between them. Naruto pressed his lips against Sasuke's throat, trailing a line of kisses down across his collar bone. Sasuke let out another throaty moan.

"Shh," Naruto hissed.

Sasuke backed away from him, keeping his eyes locked with Naruto's. His lover's blue eyes were darkened by his arousal, the pupils dilated. Swiftly, Sasuke dropped to his knees, pulling Naruto's boxers down. He placed a gentle kiss on the weeping head of Naruto's penis, before taking the full length into his mouth. Naruto locked his fingers in Sasuke's dark hair, gritting his teeth to stifle his voice. Sasuke's tongue slid around Naruto's length as he began slowly moving his head in a gentle rhythm, lapping at the head each time he moved his mouth up his lover's member. One of Sasuke's hands rested on Naruto's hip, while the other cupped his balls; occasionally he would squeeze them gently.

"Sasuke," Naruto moaned softly. All of his previous irritation at the dark haired man had fled, and all of his triumph at finally being able to beat Sasuke. Right now, he was lost in the sensations Sasuke was creating with his skilled mouth. Another groan escaped Naruto's lips, then both of them froze at the sound of a door opening.

Naruto's eyes had been half lidded, now they flew open at the sound of Kiba's voice. He glanced down to see a similar panic reflected in Sasuke's dark eyes.

"I guess they really left," Kiba was saying, "huh, that Sasuke, I was sure there was something going on with him and Naruto, then he brings that girl here; do you reckon it was a stunt?"

Whoever he was talking to answered, too low for Sasuke or Naruto to make out the words. Kiba responded to whatever was said with a bark of laughter. "Ah, he's an arrogant prick, anyway. I may just go and find that girl, show her what a real man is like."

Sasuke growled low in his throat. The vibrations from this caused Naruto to let out a strangled gasp. Sasuke's eyes had darkened to deep storm clouds. The sound of the door closing behind Kiba and his companion echoed throughout the room. Sasuke released Naruto's cock and stood up; he took something out of his pocket before dropping his trousers and underwear. Blue eyes locked with black, then Sasuke passed the small tube in his hand to Naruto.

"I want you, now." He said.

Naruto glanced down at the tube in his hand. Trust Sasuke to carry lube around with him. He found himself pressed into the wall by a very pissed off and horny Uchiha. Sasuke's mouth locked on Naruto's throat, biting and sucking in a possessive frenzy. Naruto moaned as he felt their engorged flesh connect. Sasuke's hips were moving, causing a delicious shudder to run through his groin every time their cocks connected.

Awkwardly Naruto managed to get the lid off of the tube of lube. Sasuke in this sort of mood would likely mount his cock dry, then complain when his ass was sore. Naruto coated his fingers as Sasuke's mouth bit a hungry trail down his neck and chest, before latching tightly onto his left nipple. Naruto moaned, and pressed one slick finger against Sasuke's anus. Sasuke's mouth opened in a gasp against Naruto's flesh as Naruto slowly pressed his finger in, curving it, finding the familiar spot that he knew would make Sasuke weak. He gently massaged Sasuke's prostate with his finger as Sasuke gasped and mewled against his chest, his fingers locking around Naruto's shoulders.

Loving the sounds Sasuke made, Naruto pushed another lubed finger into his lover, feeling Sasuke shudder against him. Sasuke raised his head, and their eyes locked as Naruto slowly began moving his fingers, gently stretching Sasuke's anus. Sasuke's arms wrapped around Naruto's neck; both of them moved at the same time, their lips joined in a deep kiss, teeth nipping and tongues wrapping around each other. Naruto moaned, not caring where they were, or if anyone heard. He pushed a third finger into Sasuke, loving the way his back arched, pressing their groins closer together.

"Oh God, Naruto," Sasuke groaned, pulling away from the kiss. "I'm ready."

Naruto pulled his fingers out of Sasuke's ass, feeling the muscles contract around him as he did so. Suddenly, he was very eager to sink his cock into that tight heat. Sasuke put the toilet seat lid down, then pushed Naruto down, so he was sitting on it, kissing him as he did so. Naruto wasn't surprised; even though he was the one being entered, Sasuke still liked to be on top.

Sasuke slowly lowered himself onto Naruto's cock, letting out a small moan with every inch he took in. Naruto caught his hips, guiding the angle a bit better, and was rewarded with a cry as his cock caressed Sasuke's prostate. For a moment they just stared at each other, foreheads touching, blond hair tangling with black, each revelling in the feeling of being so intimately connected to the other. The only sound was their heavy breathing and the pounding of their hearts. Then Sasuke slowly began to move, sliding himself up and down the length of Naruto's cock. Each thrust grazed his prostate and left him whimpering. Their lips hovered millimetres apart as Sasuke slowly rode Naruto, their breaths brushing the other's mouth. Finally, Sasuke's tongue flicked out, and lapped at Naruto's mouth; Naruto hungrily swallowed it, kissing Sasuke with fervent ardour, feeling Sasuke kissing him back with equal passion. Sasuke began to move faster, Naruto gripping his hips, guiding the thrusts. Sasuke's hands were tangled in Naruto's hair, the sweat formed from their lovemaking darkening the sunshine colour to a wheaten gold. The only thing either of them were aware of was the other, the feeling of their bodies connected, the pounding of their hearts. They didn't hear the doors opening, or people going about their business, and even if they had, they wouldn't have cared; all that mattered for Sasuke was Naruto, all Naruto wanted was Sasuke.

They came together, Sasuke's semen coating Naruto's belly, Naruto's flowing deep inside Sasuke. For a moment they clung to each other, shuddering with the after effects of their climaxes.

"So," Sasuke said, licking his swollen lips. "I wear the dress and you wear my clothes." He glanced uncertainly at their fallen clothing; the floor of the cubicle could be described as many things; clean was not one of them.

"I love you," Naruto murmured.

Sasuke's pale skin flushed, and he smiled, not his usual smirk, but a genuine smile. "Is that because I agreed to wear the dress or because of the amazing sex?" he asked.

"Because you're you," Naruto replied.

Sasuke caught Naruto's head between his palms, and placed a long, deep kiss on his lips. "I love you too," Sasuke whispered against Naruto's mouth, so quietly that he felt the words more than heard them.

Sasuke raised himself off of Naruto, wincing slightly, and grabbed a handful of tissue to clean himself up with. Naruto followed suit, mopping up the semen on his stomach, and the residue from his cock. he watched as Sasuke picked up the dress with a martyred sigh, before slipping it on. He tossed his own clothes to Naruto.

"Don't get too used to this," Sasuke said. "I'm going to win next time, too."

"Hah!" Naruto snorted, putting on Sasuke's clothing. "I doubt that. Get used to the feeling, Sasuke, next time the win is mine."

They exited the bathroom bickering; they had been in there longer than either of them realised. The restaurant was empty. Sasuke sighed. it looked like it was going to be Naruto's homemade ramen for dinner after all. Although, on the plus side, there weren't many people around to see him in the ridiculous dress.

Naruto sighed. he had been looking forward to eating out, instead their date had ended rather abruptly. Not that he really minded, not with the way it had ended. He grinned to himself. After all, he had got Sasuke to wear the dress. And Sasuke actually looked quite cute in it. Naruto wondered if he should tell Sasuke that.

They left the restaurant hand in hand, both dishevelled, and one of them wearing a slightly battered dress.

***

Naruto stood shame faced in the Hokage's office as Tsunade examined what was left of her dress. When they had got home, Naruto had decided that Sasuke looked too cute to resist, and decided that they should go for another round. The sex had been amazing. Unfortunately, the dress had suffered quite horribly. Sasuke had vanished in the morning, saying something about a mission that Naruto had been sure was made up. That left Naruto on his own to face Tsunade's wrath. They had planned to slip the dress back without her knowing, but with the state they had left it in, that wasn't going to work. So Naruto decided to come clean. He had ended up explaining everything to the Hokage. Well, not everything; he didn't think she wanted or needed to know the details of his and Sasuke's sex life. But he told her the basics.

Tsunade raised her eyes from the remains of her dress to regard the shame faced blond standing in front of her.

"So you've been gambling with an Uchiha, someone who possesses the Sharingan, and you wonder why you lose every time?" She said finally. "Naruto, even I wouldn't do that. I mean, I suck at gambling, but I don't purposefully set myself up to fail."

Naruto frowned, wondering why she wasn't beating the crap out of him for stealing and ruining her dress. Then the implications of her words reached him. "You mean Sasuke's been cheating?" he said incredulously.

Tsunade nodded. "Yup, looks like," she said.

"I'm going to kill him," Naruto growled, dashing out of the office.

Tsunade threw her dress into the bin beside her desk, smiling smugly to herself.

Across the village, sunning himself on a roof top, Sasuke sat up and smiled to himself, feeling Naruto's enraged chakra approaching. This was going to be fun.