AN: Roma88 requested a funny one-shot about Izumo and Kotetsu that was not yaoi, so I reached into the bag of prompts I keep handy for special occasions and pulled out … underwear. So here we go. A het fic about underwear with everyone's favorite chuunin gate guards.

It was well known in Konoha that Kamizuki Izumo, and Hagane Kotetsu were best friends. It was obvious in the way that one was rarely seen without the other. They worked well together and, like most friends that had known each other since dirt was new, they had picked up a few of the others personality traits.

This did not, however, mean that they were exactly alike. It was a fact that Izumo was painfully aware of at the moment, as he stalked down the hall towards his friend and housemate's bedroom with a pair of boxer shorts clutched in his hand. A pair of worn boxer shorts that had just fallen onto his head from the shelf above the couch. A pair that were definitely not his.

"Kotetsu!" He yelled, banging on his friends door. "I know you're in there! Open up now!"

There was some shuffling and mumbled curses heard from the other side of the door as Kotetsu made his way over to open it. When he did Izumo had to work hard to hold onto his anger and not laugh at the state of his bedraggled friend. Kotetsu looked like something the cat had dragged in at the moment. His hair was even more of a mess than usual and his eyes weren't quite open yet. But it was the lines running across his face from were he had been laying against his pillow that made him look absolutely ridiculous.

Izumo cleared his throat to cover a laugh and held up the boxers clenched in his fist.

"What the hell were you think throwing dirty boxers around the living room!" He asked, "You're damn lucky that I'm the one they fell on, 'cause if it had been a guest, I would've had to kill you."

Kotetsu blinked fuzzily at his friend, down to the boxers, back up to Izumo, and still looked completely lost.

"Where exactly were those?" he asked, trying to piece the situation together in his sleep fogged mind.

"On the shelf above the couch." Izumo ground out, "They fell on my head!"

Kotetsu raised an eyebrow, clearly unimpressed with the situation.

"I was tired, it happens." He yawned, "Stop being such a girl."

Kotetsu yawned again and Izumo counted to five in his head. The count didn't work, he way still pissed at that last comment. So he decided to deal with it in a perfectly rational and adult manner. Kotetsu reeled back from the left hook that had just caught him in the jaw. He blinked a moment more before shouting "Bastard!" and launching himself at Izumo.

"The hell did you hit me for," he accentuated with a punch to the gut.

"You called me a freaking girl, you bastard!" Izumo countered with a kick to the side.

"Well maybe if you'd stop acting like one!" The scuffle had made it's way to the floor by this time as the two continued to throw punches.

"Just because I'm not a slob…"

"…Anal retentive about everything…"

"…Leave your crap all over the house…"

"…Clean the shower grout…"

"…Can't even bring a date home…"

"Alright! Alright! Stop!" Kotetsu shouted and watched Izumo's fist stop just short of his face in what probably would have been the finishing blow to their fight. The two quickly separated and flopped on the floor across from one another.

"I'm sorry about the freaking boxers, ok! Sake is on me next time we go out." Kotetsu ran a hand over his face. Izumo nodded, looking pacified.

"Could you at least try to contain your mess." Izumo didn't have high hopes, it hadn't happened in the five years they had been living together, but it didn't hurt to ask.

"I can try." Kotetsu answered. It was good enough for now.

Both rose to their feet and headed out of the room. It was then that Izumo noticed Kotetsu's shirt, spinning lazily on the ceiling fan.

"Do I even want to know how you managed this?" he asked, glancing over at his friend.

Kotetsu clapped him on the shoulder and shook his head.

"No," he answered, "you really don't."

End AN: In my world this is how boys solve problems. Hope you like ^_^