Chapter 41- Stand In The Rain

Cate and Baze meant to tell Lux straight away. They honestly did. But by the time Cate was five months along, their daughter seemed to be the only one who didn't know. Abby had guessed it when Cate was only a few weeks along, and naturally let it slip to Laverne. Laverne, of course, had gushed dramatically that she was finally going to be a grandmother, oblivious to the comments Cate and Baze made regarding Lux. Cate and Baze decided to tell Jack and Ellen before they found out from somewhere else; they were shocked at first. Naturally. But after watching how great Cate and Baze were with Lux, and how stable they were in their relationship, the notion of another grandchild wasn't the most unexpected.

Lux sat on the couch, watching her parents expectantly. They had sat her down after dinner and were currently contemplating what to say as they sat across from her on the coffee table.

"Lux, daddy and I have some really exciting news." Cate started off nervously, smiling anxiously at Baze as she squeezed his hand tightly.

Baze squeezed back before shifting to sit beside Lux and pulling her into his lap causing the little girl to giggle. "Do you remember when you asked who Carter was? And Jones told you he was his big brother."

Lux nodded, intrigued at the mention of her best friend. "Well how would you like a little brother or sister."

Lux looked confused, switching her glance between both of her grinning parents. "Why?"

The question caught both of her parents by surprise and they exchanged glances, deciding how to reply. "Well, because mommy and I are going to have a baby, and that will make you the baby's big sister."

Lux shook her head, folding her arms across her chest defiantly. "I don't want to."

Cate and Baze exchanged a surprised glance, neither know how to react. "Why don't you want to, kiddo?"

"Coz I don't want to." Lux huffed, scowling.

Cate shifted to sit beside them, trying to figure her daughter out. "It's okay to be scared, Lux. Being a big sister is a really important role. You're going to be there to help look after the baby, and make sure that they always have a friend. It's scary, but it's also really exciting and daddy and I are going to help you be the best big sister in the world."

"I'm not scared!" Lux stood up, yelling and shocking both of her parents. "I don't want a stupid baby!" Lux screamed, walking off. They heard her bedroom door slam seconds later and Cate was instantly up and making her way after her.

Baze stopped her before she could leave, wrapping an arm around her comfortingly as she leaned into him tiredly. "Well that went better than expected." She mumbled sarcastically.

Baze smirked slightly at the comment, kissing the top of her head lovingly. "She'll come around."

"I thought she'd be excited."

Baze nodded; Lux's reaction hadn't been anywhere near what they had been expecting. To be honest, it scared him. "Let's just give some time. It's a lot for her to take in."

Cate nodded, sighing and leaning into Baze as he sat down on the couch. They sat in silence for a few moments, watching as Baze's hand ran gently across Cate's stomach.

Lux was really angry but she didn't know why. Olivia and her had been working on feelings and how to figure out why she felt certain things and certain times, but she didn't understand why she felt angry about having a baby brother or sister. She had always wanted to be a big sister.

Lux sniffled, wiping her face as she shuffled off of her bed and made her way to her bedroom door. Maybe her mommy and daddy would know why she was angry.

Lux made her way down the hallway but stopped when she saw her mom and dad on the couch, smiling and playing with Cate's stomach. That's when it hit her. They didn't want her anymore. That's why they were having a new baby. It was clear they already loved the new baby more than they did her, and it wasn't even there yet! When it did get there, Lux knew they were just going to give her away again.

Lux huffed; angry, sad and scared as she quickly ran back to her room. She grabbed her back pack and emptied it, only putting the really "important" things back in. She grabbed her coat off of the coat rack in the hallway when her parents weren't looking and quickly slipped out the back door, running as fast as she could down the street.

"Lux?" Cate knocked gently on Lux's bedroom door, pushing it open slightly when she didn't get a reply. "Honey, I want to talk to you, okay?"

The emptiness of the room surprised Cate and she instinctively held a hand to her stomach, looking around. "Lux?"

After checking all of Lux's usual hiding places, Cate was officially freaking out. She made her way back into the living room where Baze was, panicking. "Did Lux come out here?"

"She's not in her room?" Baze stood up from the couch, sensing Cate's panic. He moved past her, walking through the house as Cate followed. "Lux? Where are you?"

"Are you hiding? Baby, we won't be mad. Just please come out now."

After checking the house three times, Cate and Baze were sure Lux was gone, and Cate was on the verge of completely freaking out.

"She's not here!"

Baze nodded, moving closer to Cate to try and keep her from completely losing it. "She's got to be here somewhere."

"Baze..." Cate whispered, her eyes filling with tears.

Baze shook his head, pulling her towards him as she latched onto him desperately. "No, he's in prison. She's okay. She's going to be fine."

Cate let out a sob into his chest, protectively holding a hand to her stomach. "This cannot be happening again."

The minute Jack Bazile had hung up the phone, he was out of the front door. His son had called him to tell him Lux was missing, and Jack had immediately began to panic. Of course, he didn't tell Ellen; he didn't want to worry his wife.

Jack drove around the neighborhood for a while, keeping his eyes peeled. He didn't know why he was looking around the streets; Lux hated the dark and she knew better than to run away. If Lux had voluntarily run away, there had to be a good reason. Five year olds didn't just run away from home, right?

He spotted her the second he pulled into the car park; her blonde hair and penguin clutched tightly in her hands made it almost impossible to miss her, even in the dark.

"Lux?" Jack called out gently to announce his arrival, taking a seat beside her when he saw her relax. He was mad, but the sight of his granddaughter crying by her own in the dark broke his heart.

"You know your mom and dad are very worried about you." He spoke after a few minutes of silence, looking at her sternly.

Lux shook her head, her chin quivering as she sniffled. "Nuh uh."

"Of course they are, Lux. You know better than to leave without them. They were very worried when they realized you were gone. They had no idea where you were."

"No they're not!" Again Lux shook her head, angry as she started to cry. "They don't want me anymore!"

Jack shifted so that he was face to face with Lux, shocked at her outburst. "Lux, why would you think that?"

Lux threw herself into Jack's arms, surprising him as she cried into his shoulder. "Coz they're getting a new baby!"

It suddenly all made sense and Jack worked hard to hide his amusement, rubbing Lux's back comfortably as he shifted so she was sitting on his lap. "Honey, your mom and dad are having another baby because they love you. They love you so much that they want to have another little girl or boy just like you!"

Lux sniffled, listening but not sure what to say. "Like me?"

"Yeah, just like you." Jack smirked as Lux's demeanor changed slightly.

Lux thought for a moment, sniffling as she cuddled more into Jack. "Can I live with you and grandma when the new baby comes?"

Jack smiled, trying his best not to laugh as he brushed Lux's hair back from her face. "No, sweetheart, you're going to live with your parents like you do now."

Lux wanted to argue but she knew that wasn't a good idea with her gramps, so she let it go; burying her thoughts.

By the time Jack brought Lux home, she was exhausted and nervous, much like her parents.

Cate swooped her up the second she walked through the front door, hugging her tightly while Baze moved to Jack.

"Thanks, dad."

Jack nodded toward Lux, patting Baze's arm. "You need to talk to her." He advised before saying goodbye and leaving.

As upset as she was, Lux couldn't deny being in her mom's arms was the greatest feeling in the world. She sniffled into Cate's shoulder, gripping her tighter as she remembered that once the new baby was here, they were going to give her away and she would never get to hug her mom or dad again.

The second Jack had left, Cate carried Lux into the lounge room and sat her on the lounge, holding her arms so she couldn't get away. "Where were you? Lux, we have told you so many times before to tell us if you want to go somewhere. You know that you can't leave the house without your dad or I."

Lux mumbled to herself, looking away to avoid her parents' eye contact as they sat in front of her. "I didn't want to tell you."

Cate sighed angrily, running a stressed hand through her hair. "Do you have any idea how worried we were? Do you even care?"

Lux struggled in Cate's grasp, trying to escape as Cate held her arms to keep her in place.

"No..." Lux mumbled, avoiding eye contact.

"'No' you don't know or 'no' you don't care?" In the back of her mind, Cate knew she was talking more maturely than a five year old should be able to understand but she didn't care.

"No." Lux whined, pulling away.

Baze picked her up before she could run, Cate standing up beside them as Lux struggled.

"I don't care how angry you are at mom or I, you cannot run off like that."

"Let me go!" Lux yelled, pounding at Baze with her fists and catching both her parents by shock.

Baze placed Lux on the floor when they got inside and both he and Cate watched as she ran to her room, slamming the door behind her. They exchanged a glance before following, not sure what to think.

"Lux!" Cate's eyes widened as they walked into Lux's room, watching as the blonde threw things around the room, breaking everything in sight. Dr. Cameron had mentioned the possibility of Lux having an anger fit, and they had witnessed one before when Dr. Cameron was talking to Lux about Kevin, but they had never seen anything quite like this. "Hey! Stop!"

Baze grabbed Lux's arms to keep her from knocking over her beside lamp, taken back when she tried to hit him away, crying harder.

"Lux, what has gotten into you?" Baze asked, more to himself than to his daughter.

Lux stopped her movements, crying as her dad rubbed her arms soothingly. "You don't want me anymore!"

Cate and Baze were taken aback to say the least, neither knowing what to say. "Lux..."

"Lux, baby, why would you even think that?"

Lux folded her arms across her chest, crying as she mumbled. "Because you want to have a new baby."

Both Cate and Baze came to the heart-breaking realization and on instinct tried to comfort their daughter; Lux pulling away. "Oh, god, Lux... Is that why you think we're having another baby? Because we don't want you anymore?"

Lux didn't say anything, avoiding eye contact as she sniffled and nodded. "Sweetheart, we're not having another baby because we don't want you anymore. We're having another baby because we want you to have a little brother or sister." So it wasn't the whole truth.

Lux sniffled, mumbling. "I know. That's what grandpa said."

Cate frowned, brushing back Lux's hair from her face gently. "Then why would you think that we don't want you anymore?"

"Coz you didn't want me before." To Lux, it made perfect sense, but Cate and Baze had no idea what she was talking about.

"What do you mean we didn't want you before, kiddo?" Baze pulled Lux closer to him, relieved when she sat on his knee rather than pulling away.

"When I was a baby." Lux mumbled knowingly. "You didn't want me so you gave me away."

Cate and Baze exchanged a glance, their hearts breaking. No matter how many times they had tried to explain to Lux why they gave her up at birth, she couldn't understand.

"Baby, I want you to listen to me, okay?" Cate waited until Lux reluctantly made eye contact before continuing. "Daddy and I? We love you. We love you more than you could ever know, and that will never change. No matter what happens; how old you get or how many babies come into our family, we will never give you away again, and you will never be replaced to us. Okay?"

Lux sniffled, nodding slightly. Cate sighed, pulling Lux into a hug and holding her tightly. Lux gripped her mom back, turning her head into her shoulder but not letting go. "Can I sleep with you?"

Cate nodded, wanting more than anything to keep Lux in sight. She passed Lux over to Baze as they stood up, Baze wrapping an arm around Cate's shoulder with one arm as he carried Lux with the other, while Cate hands instinctively went to her stomach, throwing a silent prayer up that everything was going to work out okay.

A/N: Quick question, fabulous readers- which story would you like to see updated next? I am honestly trying my hardest to update whenever I can! Anyway, hope you enjoyed and please review :)