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She was about thirty five now, a whole fifteen years after she climbed out of the rabbit hole. Her career had grown steadily and was now one of the main focuses of her life. Her face still held the youth and innocence of a twenty year old and it concerned her slightly. She wasn't aging, and she felt stuck. Even now, as she had the same argument she'd had for the last several years since becoming a partner in the company, she continued to feel stuck. Lord Ascot looked at her like she had grown a second head. "What do you think you're wearing?"
She looked down at her legs and the gray fabric she'd chosen before shrugging. "Slacks."
"You're absolutely bonkers." He didn't know what to think. It was wrong on so many levels for a woman to wear slacks.
She froze mid word, looked at him with strange eyes. It hit her hard in the chest. Every memory she'd managed to put away for another day was there again, and she realized why she felt stuck. She needed to get back to Underland. She needed to get back to the Hatter.
Oh, how she'd dreamed especially of him. It took her a few years to realize she was in love with him, and by then she was too caught up in her life to do anything about it. Not that she hadn't tried, she just hadn't tried as hard as she could have. But she could get back now, as she was standing in the study of the very house where the rabbit hole was located. "You're right." She looked at Lord Ascot with a grin. "I am absolutely mad, but so are the best people."
She didn't walk out, she ran. And though she was chasing absolutely nothing this time around, it felt as if she was chasing everything. Before she could get very far, she stopped. If she didn't wear some kind of a dress she was going to have a problem when it came time to go through the door.
It didn't take her long to change, she was living right in the mansion with Lord Ascot now that her mother was dead and she wasn't settled down. The dress she chose after quick deliberation was long and green as a leaf. It was far more comfortable than the slacks she had been wearing, and certainly more ascetically pleasing. "Where do you think you're going?" Lord Ascot walked in just as she stepped out of the closet, fully changed.
She smiled, touched his cheek in a rare exchange of respect and admiration. "If I told you, you'd never believe me."
"Just like your father, always so sure of your path." He laughed halfheartedly. "Does this mean I'm losing my partner, or do you intend on returning?"
"I shan't be returning." She grabbed a hat, just something simple she'd gotten to keep the sun off her face. It was black and it was technically a man's hat. She handed it to Lord Ascot. "Thank you for every opportunity you've given me in my lifetime."
He took the hat, but only held it in his hands as they stood inches apart. She was more like a daughter to him than his son was a son now. And she was leaving. But it would be inappropriate for him to hug her as she was not really his daughter. "I will call you a carriage."
"No need." She laughed as she thought about what he'd say if he knew exactly what it would look like for her to go down a rabbit hole, a grown adult. " I have a very special way of getting where I'm going."
"Do you at least want me to see you off?" He didn't like this, not at all, but there would be no stopping her now.
"No, it's best if you don't. Goodbye, my friend." She let her legs carry her as fast as they could. This time it didn't take more than a couple of minutes to find the hole. Taking a deep breath, she jumped down and let herself fall into Underland.
She walked through the forest, trying her best to remember the way. Was it right or was it left? Oh, how she hated finding herself lost. "Are you lost?" A familiar voice called her attention out of the bushes. She turned to smile at the white rabbit. "You look a little late for something."
"Yes, I'm very lost, I'm afraid." She knelt down to his level. "Do you know how to get to the tea party from here?"
"What do you want from them?" The white rabbit looked at her with an odd look, she looked familiar but...
"It's me, you silly little creature, Alice." She hadn't realized she would be forgotten by them over the course of time. But then again, she hadn't realized a lot of things. What if the Mad Hatter didn't feel the same way she did? What if he, like the rabbit, had forgotten about her? What was she to do? She'd already said her goodbyes. No, she scolded herself, she had to believe better than that.
"Oh, of course, Alice my dear, why didn't you say so." He hopped off down a path, and she more than willingly followed. "You should be happy to know that the kingdom has been rightfully restored. However, there are some people on whom the effects are permanent. Ah, here we are. It was nice seeing you again."
"The same to you, good sir." She kept on going and saw windmill, they'd obviously came around the other side, no wonder she'd been so lost.
The music was absent when she reached the broken down old windmill. However, there was a familiar clanking of tea things. She walked around, the building, never once catching the suspicion of the practically silent tea party.
Once she was almost directly behind the hatter, not even six yards away, she heard a voice behind her. "And what do you think you're up to?"
She turned to face the vanishing cat. Secretly she wished people wouldn't come up behind her like that, but what was she supposed to do? This was, after all, Underland. "Hello, Cheshire."
"He's been waiting for you, you know." He was floating around her with a frown. "Fifteen years, he sat sipping his tea and waiting for you to come back like you said you would. And now that it's convenient for you, you decide to stroll on back in."
"I know what you all must think of me." She looked at the back of the hatter's chair and the very top of his hat. His friends wouldn't be pleased with her for walking back into his life. People she believed to be her friends too, it was another reason she shouldn't have come. "I tried to come back ten years ago, but I couldn't find the rabbit hole."
"Maybe you weren't really trying." He smiled mischievously, so sure that he'd figured her out.
"Don't be ridiculous, I've wanted nothing more than to come back and be with him since the day I left, I was afraid." She'd said too much, she realized, but now that she had, she asked more. "Why is it I no longer age."
"I haven't the foggiest," Cheshire stopped and materialized. "It is entirely possible you ticked Time off, after all, he's a very impatient man. Or maybe that was his gift to you for slaying the Jabberwock. Either way, I wouldn't complain, people who age wouldn't last long in Underland. They'd die, you know."
"Well, that's the first bit of logic you've spoken since we met." She adjusted her skirt, ran her fingers through her hair. It was good to know she'd mastered the art of resizing after so many horrible accidents. She was perfectly the size she needed to be. "Now, if you'll excuse me."
"You're in love with him." She did not answer him, but walked up silently to the hatter's chair. "I must see this." Cheshire settled in to enjoy the show.
She watched the hatter sip his tea with a prominent frown. It seemed odd that he would not notice her when she stood no more than a foot away. The March Hare was staring straight ahead and twitching, so he didn't notice her. The only one to pay her any mind was the Dormouse, and he almost burst out, if it wasn't for her quick look that silenced him.
"Did you ever figure out why a raven was like a writing desk?" She spoke up now. He stood slowly, it felt like an eternity before he finally faced her. Even then, it took him a minute to speak. She couldn't see anything but him, she couldn't hear anything but the in and out of his breath.
"No." He smiled, but he wasn't happy. His eyes were sad, she didn't know how she knew that, but the color was all wrong. Maybe she was seeing things, but she didn't think so. No, she just knew him. "I don't even know if there is an answer anymore."
"There is, I know there is." She took his hands in hers, "We'll figure it out together."
"Together?" There was the hope she was expecting, and his smile grew a little wider. "Are you staying?"
"I don't belong up there anymore." He looked at her, confused. She laughed lightly, but only once as to not confuse him further. " I'm in love with you, you crazy fool. " She inched closer so that the only room between them was the space their hands occupied. He smelled strongly of tea, cake, and honey. It was a smell she'd missed greatly. "I belong right here with you, always." She reached up and touched his cheek with a smile. "That is, if you want me with you."
He said nothing, only kissed her hard on the mouth. She clung to him as he picked her up, swung her around. The March Hare started clapping manically, the Dormouse cheered. And when he put her down, he looked into her eyes with a huge grin. "We will have so much fun." He turned back to the table and thrust a cup into her hands. "Plenty of fun here around the tea table..." He tried to pour her some tea, but nothing came out.
She didn't need him to tell her he loved her, she thought as she watched him look at the pot in disgust, the words didn't matter because they'd have forever for words. "I think I've figured it out..." She sat down at the table, and reaching out, she took the pot from him. With a grin she intended to wear for the rest of her life, she opened it and showed him that it was empty. For now the fact that she figured out the riddle was unimportant to them as he took the tea pot from her and shook his head sadly before asking her. "Why is the tea always gone?"