Haruhi Hacked

I was sitting at my computer. I had just gotten home from school and I was sipping at a frappachino. More like crappachino! I threw it on the ground and decided to call my good friend Sydney.

Or in other words, the true, real-world, living Tsuruya. xD

Conversation…

Syd- Oh hai, frriieed! Wasssaaap?!?

Me- Hey Syd. I am writing this one-shot fanfiction. What should it be about?

Syd- Fried Onions and unlimited text :P

Me-What?

Syd-Hahaha I will ruuuleee the world!

Me- (Conversation cut off)

Syd- Muhahahahaha. This is my Haruhi now

*Lady Gaga starts to play*

Kyon walked into the club room with shock on his face. Haruhi was standing in the middle of the room in her underwear.

"Haruhi, too much information." And he ran out.

A few minutes later, he walked back in. This time he saw Haruhi and Mikuru both in the middle of the room in their underwear.

(insert nosebleed) "OHMIGAWD!" And he ran out into the hallway once again.

Finally, he walked into the room to see all three girls standing in the room in their underwear. It was really something to see, and Kyon did in fact get a hard-on from this. Regardless, he ran out of the room. Upon leaving, he ran into Itsuki Koizumi…also in his underwear.

"Hai, I'm Itsuki." He said

Kyon looked up at him and said "Gawd dammit I know who u are!"

Then out of nowhere 4 treadmills fell into the clubroom, and the entire band of Ok Go was doing their dance…in their underwear.

"Here it goes here it goes here it goes again" Sang Damien Kulash.

For some reason that made Kyon even hornier. Finally, he tore off all his clothes but his underwear, and started dancing along with the band and the rest of the SOS Brigade. It was a sight to see! The ultimate pantless rave!

Later that day, when all of the SOS Brigade was fully clothed once again and Ok Go had left, Kyon got a little surprise. He was walking home when he saw Yuki Nagato running up to him faster than you could say "Gay porn".

He turned around, and then she stopped right in front of him.

"Hello, Kyon." She said

"Oh, hello, Yuki. What's up? Why are you acting so weird?"

She looked shyly down at the ground and then at him.

"These occurrences are not under my control."

"Then I'm guessing they're un- wait, did you just say my name?"

"Yes, Kyon-Kun."

"Do it again. It's hawt. Sorry, Yoo-kee, Imma bit high rite now."

Now, you're probably asking, how did Kyon get high so suddenly? It was the environment. It was full of pollutants that made him high. You could get high too if we don't try to prevent forest fires. A public service announcement from T-Pain and Al Capone, brought to you by Wendy's ©.

"I wish I could get high like you, Kyon. But only humans are weak to this high pollutant because God hates you."

Kyon's face turned red and he swiftly turned around, kissing Yuki passionately.

"You so hawt when you tawk"

Yuki kissed him back. She was in heaven. All that disappearance must of paid off. Thank you, forest fires!!

"Kyon-kun…I uh-"

Kyon cut her off "Keep talking. And talk smooth. Smoother. Like pudding.

"Kyon, you know this isn't a lemon fic…right?"

Kyon started whimpering "No, I did nawt. But we can still make love?"

Yuki started to walk away. "Not this publicly. I'm gonna go, read a book or something….maybe do something with my life."

When Kyon got home, he called 1-800-Pop-Star. It was supposedly the sexiest sex hotline around. But they refused them service because he liked waffles, so he then started to cry and hit his sister.

"Kyon-kun, Denwa?" She said while being abused.

"Is that all you say, you little- I'm sorry. Work was hard today."

Kyon doesn't work?

"I wanna be a racecar driver when I grow up." Kyon's sister said

"That's so cool. Let's go play Pokemon!"

So they ran off, happily engulfed in there Pokemonic thoughts. And they all lived happily ever after.

Until… Sydney hacked them again.

Thar endin'

My friend texted me a lot of ideas. As is…well, Sydney. At the end, I kinda finished it. Right where he said "Work was hard today." So yah. Also, Ok Go is a really good band. Go to You Tube and check them out. Kudos to them, and also 1-800-POP-STAR (real number,DON'T CALL IT!!). T-Pain, and Al Capone. I do not own Haruhi or any of those things listed above. Give them credit. Also, the game.