A/N: WARNING HIGHLY CORROSIVE CRACK
Me: I don't own Skulduggery Pleasant…
Skullduggery: You wish you did.
Me: Damn right.
Chapter 1 Confession:
"Skulduggery, I think I love you"
Silence.
"You think. How positive are you exactly. Are you saying 75 percent, 89.5 maybe or are we talking about-"
"Fine. I know I love you. In everyway a person can love another. I really do Skulduggery and you're the only one I can imagine spending the rest of my life with"
"Ah"
Silence.
"Ah"
More silence.
Sudden insane laughter and Skulduggery banging his fist on the steering wheel of the Bentley.
"You're a necrophiliac!"
"What I said I loved you Skulduggery"
"I know but you said in everyway a person can love another"
"Oh, shut up"
"But- laughter- it's true!"
"Skulduggery, please look where you are driving- Skulduggery! Great, see you missed the turn! Skulduggery why have you got your mobile out?"
"Calling Fletcher. I can't wait to see his face when I tell him-"
"Don't you dare tell Fletcher Renn. Or I will murder you"
"Good luck with killing a dead person. Which reminds me- You're a necrophiliac!"
"Glad to see you're so happy about your freakish condition"
"That wasn't very nice- Well at least I'm not a necrophiliac"
More laughing.
"Will you just stop?"
"Not until you stop being a necrophiliac- which I hope will never happen"
Silence.
"You're blushing"
"Shut up and drive"
"Yes dear"