Preface: I've been getting quite a few comments over my revamping Konoha's Genin Test and how they needed to know 50 jutsus to pass. I'm going to stand by that as frankly they seem to consider just about any kind of ninja art as being a jutsu; even that "Rope Escape Technique" or "Camouflage Blanket" and not even considering taijutsu moves or throws count as a kind of jutsu. I'm not saying that they should be able to cast 50 different kinds of elemental attacks but I think it's not unbelievable that a Genin would have a repertoire of basic combat skills to be able to operate in the field.

Naruto flung up his forearm to deflect the punch and grimaced at the impact which caused his radius bone to shatter and his ulna crack. He was too used to being stronger than any normal human that he had forgotten the sheer physical strength that Natasha wielded was even greater than his own. He used the power of her punch to boost his leap backwards out of her range and flooded his arm with his chakra to boost the healing.

Natasha snarled and flung her own arm forward and a limb of shadows formed and elongated, sharpened claws streaking out to impale him. The former Hokage cartwheeled away, evading the deadly strikes as he let his healing factor finish it's work on his arm. Then suddenly he seized the claws with his fixed arm and gave it a fast and hard pull, yanking Natasha off her feet and causing her to fly towards him. He drove a powerful punch into her midsection, causing the Queen of the Vampires to double up, spitting up a globule of blood. He continued to hammer her with elbow strikes and backfists.

Natasha might have the slight edge over him on pure strength, but he was pretty sure that he was faster and better at hand to hand. Natasha reared back and suddenly spun out with a roundhouse kick that he barely saw out of the corner of his eye. The impact smashed into his ribs, sending him flying to crash into the hard ground over a dozen feet away.

Of course, that margin was a lot thinner than he would have liked.

Naruto rolled to his feet even as he pressed a hand towards his ribcage, assessing the damage. As Natasha hadn't followed up that assault, he judged that she needed a moment to recover as well. Unfortunately, he was pretty sure that her healing factor was even faster than his.

Instinct warned him to bend backwards suddenly. Lucky thing too because a shadow scythe-like blade almost decapitated him. Naruto flipped himself back upright and fanned out his left hand, producing a brace of kunai that he flung out, causing Natasha to dodge the blades.

However it was just a distraction as Naruto tucked his right hand behind his back and gathered his chakra to form a rapidly rotating sphere. The sphere began emitting a high pitched earsplitting bell-like screech as Naruto reared back as the elongated blades of the mini-Rasenshuriken was formed and extended outward.

With a foxy grin, Naruto sent the deadly projectile hurtling out to impact a surprised Natasha. The spheroid exploded, creating thousands of shredding wind blades. They tore through a screaming Natasha—leaving nothing behind but nothing but small fragments.

Naruto blinked, vaguely surprised at how easily that had—he pricked his ears as he heard chanting.

"Howl your fury, Lord of the North Winds!
Great Storm that blows across Eternity,"

His head snapped upward to see the Queen of the Vampires alive and intact floated in midair with a pair of large bat-like wings lazily flapping. She had her hand stretched out and was busy doing a spell invocation. Aw hell—she must have used a Shadow Puppet! Naruto realized that he had just been suckered by one of his favorite techniques. Or rather Natasha's version of it.

"Shaker of the Great Tree at World's End,
Heed unto me, Tempest!
Gather in my hand and scour my foe from the Earth!"

A spinning vortex of black air formed in her palm and then began doubling in size and speed, until she was holding a gigantic spinning whirlwind. She snapped her arm down, hurling the spinning vortex at Naruto Uzumaki and finished her chant with a roar. "DARK WIND!"

With a mighty roar, the impossibly inverted spinning tornado came crashing down.

Harry watched with awe as his adopted father flashed through eight handseals and then stomped his foot down hard on the ground. "DOTON! Womb of the Green Mother!"

Instantly, stone erupted upward and flowed together to create a large dome that shielded the former Hokage from Natasha's attack.

It was already impressive that Naruto needed so few hand signs to accomplish that technique that would have required seventeen seals, but it was practically unheard of to use one's other limbs as the foci. Normally ninjas channeled their attacks through their hands as it has the highest concentration of tenketsu points or through the mouth as it was practically a direct conduit to one's chakra coils.

The rocky shield held briefly as the wind blasted at it and despite the durability of the earth, the winds proved stronger. Within a matter of moments, they had tore away huge chunks of the dome and leaving behind … nothing.

Natasha glanced up to see a rapidly descending Naruto with a kunai in hand and aimed at her spine. Instantly, her bat-like wings shifted in shape, becoming a mass of razor sharp tentacles that shot up to impale Naruto who instantly poofed into a cloud of smoke.

In response, Natasha's entire form turned black and she literally melted into a shadow portal, narrowly evading a trio of screaming arc-like vacuum blades of wind chakra that would have chopped her into three separate pieces.

Back on the ground, Naruto tsked and snapped his fingers. "Darn. Missed."

He suddenly leapt upward, just in time to avoid getting skewered straight through his crotch by a gigantic shadow-blade that had erupted from beneath his feet. "HEY!" he squawked, pale and sweat dropping at the near castration.

Natasha chuckled darkly as she emerged from a shadow portal some distance away. She began chanting once more; causing blue flames to erupt from her fingertips and dancing on her arms and in the air around them.

"Lord of Destruction! I summon thee!
Great Hades who rules Tartarus, Lend me your fiery rage,
Seethe and surge, Boil and burn, Turn all of Creation to ash!
Bring forth your incandescent judgment!
BURNING RUINATION!"

Naruto blinked the ground itself started rumbling and shaking and the temperature jumped upward until the air itself started to sizzle and the earth began to bubble and smoke. He abruptly found himself standing at ground zero of a volcano that spat a column of blue fire several hundreds of feet up into the air.

Naruto came crashing down onto an empty patch of earth. "HOT! HOT! HOT!" he cursed as he swatted at some of his clothing that was still alight. Natasha spun in place and launched a series of shadowy dart-like arrows with a wave of her hand. They shrieked through the air, curving around several obstacles before they crashed into a still swearing Naruto who toppled over. A split second later, there was a poof of smoke and a badly perforated log.

A pair of hands suddenly punched through the ground and seized Natasha's ankles. "DOTON! Excavation Graveyard!" Naruto roared as he pulled her into the earth completely.

For a moment, the entire battlefield was silent. Then there came a rumbling and the earth exploded outward in a wave of black energy, forming a mushroom-like cloud.

Harry flinched at the tremendous explosion, he heard pebbles rattling as they came showering down. Several of them even pattering on his head.

At first glance, anyone would assume that Naruto and Natasha were trying to kill each other. However Harry couldn't rid himself of the thought that this was their version of flirting.

He further wondered if he was actually far enough away to be safe from all of this even as he flashed back to how this whole thing started…

Harry Uzumaki & the 9-Tailed Fox

Chapter 5: The Mystery Revealed

Harry Uzumaki tried not to fidget. It was difficult as he sitting next to his adopted father who was sitting right across from the Queen of the Vampires. Frankly, he would have just as accepted her offer to find suitable quarters for Naruto's pet human while they discussed things in private.

Even if he did find that "pet" crack downright insulting.

A glance into her eyes quickly dismissed any idea of a withering retort though. The fact that she was totally lacking pupils was a trifle disturbing, but the fact that the entire sclera (that were supposed to be white!) were instead pulsating with a glowing reddish hue turned that disturbing factor and ratcheted it up right into frightening and an aversion to avoid looking at them.

Naruto had bluntly told her that Harry would be staying here with them. He saw Natasha's eyes narrow momentarily as well as a checked snarl, but she had smoothly accepted it. Like any Royalty or five-year old, Natasha clearly did not care to have her wishes flatly disobeyed.

He knew why Naruto had rudely turned down the offer though; he didn't trust them and wanted Harry to be in his line-of-sight and theoretically under his protection. But sitting right next to Naruto, he couldn't help but feel like he was right in the middle of a bull's eye.

Or rather … sitting right next to one. He also got the feeling that Natasha wasn't the sort to be bothered too much by collateral damage.

The whole meeting insanely enough, brought to Harry's mind of these tea parties hosted by Aunt Petunia. Inflexibly formal, icy manners, guarded conversation, and a preplanned event program that everyone rigidly adhered to.

Or else.

Of course, Natasha brought all new meaning to the "or else" threat that Aunt Petunia could only dream of.

Serving in Harry's previous role of fetcher, waiter, and toady were a group of … things that resembled small children toys. Demented children.

They were small, dumpy, pot bellied, and furry animal-like creatures that might have even been cute—were they not so battered looking and have dozens of crude stitching attaching mismatched body parts.

He had absently thanked one for giving him a cup and received an inhumanly large smile that split open half of the creature's face as well; revealing several rows of incredibly sharp gleaming metal teeth that sharks would have envied … and the only perfectly immaculate part of the thing's anatomy.

All in all, instead of cute; the stitched dolls were incredibly creepy and looked like Toys from Hell that had been marked down and bought on sale.

Taking a closer look at the various dolls, he noticed that all of them were armed in some fashion. Literally. They either bore serrated blades for claws and/or knife-like teeth. Or both. Harry was forcibly reminded of Naruto's stories of ninja puppets and wondered if those pudgy bodies concealed hidden weapons and lethal gadgetry inside of them.

The puppet master was the strange creature lurking behind Natasha as her personal servant. She, (it appeared to be a human female) was clearly in command, nudging and ordering the smaller ones around. Like her charges, she too seemed to be composed mainly of poor stitching.

However, Harry couldn't help but suspect that like the small dolls, her body parts weren't entirely original and happened to be harvested from human corpses (or so he hoped; he really, really didn't want to think she might have acquired them from still living bodies). And there were bits and pieces of her that were clearly mechanical. Natasha had airily introduced her as Ms. Stein.

"So you're not holding a grudge over that … uh … thing?" Naruto inquired cautiously.

Natasha smirked and drained her wineglass. "What that? Oh, of course not. Don't be silly. I just wanted to see you sweat a little bit."

Harry got a meaningful elbow jab and a wink from Naruto as if to say: See? What did I tell you.

Ms. Stein leaned closer and began to refill Natasha's glass. Harry frowned as the red liquid spilled from the crystalline decanter. There was an odd smell to it—it took him a second to remember that his hostess was a vampire which meant that it wasn't red wine that she was drinking like he had automatically assumed. His stomach did a fast dip and slow spin to the left.

Natasha noticed Harry's focus on her drink and her smile turned even wider, showing her prominent canines. "Oh, my apologies. Did you want some … stronger refreshment?" she inquired politely even as Ms. Stein presented the decanter for inspection. As if to confirm Harry's suspicions instead of a wine label, the bottle was typed AB Negative.

"I'm good." Harry squeaked, vowing to only use his own personal rations that he had packed while here. God only knew what some of these … creatures ate and drank. Did they have a Monster Version of the 4 Major Food Groups? That's right Timmy, if you don't finish your freshly squeezed bug saliva, you don't get your human flesh dessert…

Natasha gave an amused chuckle. "Oh, your pet is so adorable! I simply must get one of my very own!" she remarked lightly.

Harry never thought he'd miss Uncle Vernon but he suddenly found being contemptuously yelled as 'Boy!' was actually far more tolerable than being condescendingly referred to as 'Pet'.

Naruto's hand clamped down on Harry's shoulder. "He's not my 'pet' Tasha. He's my adopted son and apprentice."

Natasha leaned back in her chair and tittered. "Oh really! Namikaze, you always are so amusing! Adopting a human!"

Naruto correctly tightly. "Uzumaki."

Natasha chuffed. "Still holding a grudge against your father are we?" she remarked blandly.

"What can I say? I'm only human," Naruto remarked with a pair of spread hands and a razor sharp smirk.

Natasha merely raised an elegant eyebrow. "You are no more human than I am Naruto. Even though your adopted son is descended from the wizard sect, he will probably not live more than a century and a half."

Both Naruto and Harry blinked and exchanged puzzled looks. "What's a wizard?" they asked virtually simultaneously.

An entire race of magic wielders. Hidden away. Harry shook his head. He should really be more shocked at this but considering his life and what he had encountered so far, it was not the most unbelievable thing that he ever heard of. He was considering how more ridiculous his life could become.

Of course, the most cliché crap would be if he was actually some sort of prophesized champion destined to defeat some sort of ultimate evil. Wait—that sounded an awful lot like what his father had to go through as a teenager. Hmmm, it would be awfully cool if I get some sort of magic sword like King Arthur.

Maybe he should ask Naruto for some training in kenjutsu. Just in case.

He frowned as he saw Natasha prepping some new sort of spell. For all her claims that this was a "friendly little spar", he got the feeling that the Queen of the Vampires was still holding a bit of a grudge.

Either that or all of the women that Naruto knew were all incredibly violent…

"The Wheel Revolves, Everlasting Night hear my plea,
Darkness beyond Blackest Pitch,
Darkness of the Deepest Abyss,
A Hush Profound, of Eternal Silence…"

Naruto paled as he heard the chanting and recognized that particular spell. "Uh Natasha… I think this is going a bit too far…" as he saw black flames ignite around her form.

"O Crooked One, heed my summons,
The Sands of Time spin back,
The Hourglass Reverses, The Wheel Revolves…"

"OK, I give! Natasha! You win! OK? Natasha?"

The flames had become black lightning dancing, crackling, sparking as they skittered around and began to solidify.

Several miles away, Harry Uzumaki felt the awesome energies being gathered and decided to follow that itching feeling in the back of his spine and practiced an ancient ninja art called "The Awaiting Turtle in Repose".

Someone of more modern parlance would simply call it Put Your Head Between Your Legs and Kiss Your Ass Goodbye.

"Khaos cast open yon Eye,
Bring forth Darkness from Beyond Darkness,
Shadow Beyond Shadow,
Night Beyond the Deepest Black,
From the Furthest Chasm, I CALL UPON THEE!"

Natasha held open the palm of her hand in supplication as the blackness began to swirl and congeal in her palm, creating a small pocket of … inky nothingness.

Then everything seemed to pause. The rushing air seemed to falter, the sounds of raging battle stilled, even the heaving earth quieted for a moment.

And in that moment of absolute quiet stillness and silence, Naruto could hear Natasha whisper… "Eternal Twilight."

Naruto winced as he saw the sphere of darkness erupt outward. His eyes closed into slits as he stroked his chin sagely, "Oh yeah, she's still holding a bit of a grudge," he muttered as it raced to claim him.

And the entire world turned black.

A/N: For those of you wondering, yes Natasha is a spellcaster. Her style of magic however is different from those utilized by the wizards and witches in Harry Potter's universe. About the best I can think of is that her style resembles that of the Slayers! or maybe from the Negima! manga.

From what I've seen in HP, for the most part wizards and witches channel their own internal magical energies from their "cores" to power to their spells. Natasha however, employs external sources to power her battle spells. If you paid attention, every spell she uses refers to an external patron or god or whatever; Lord of the North Winds, Hades, Chaos, etc. For those of you of a mythological bent, the 'O Crooked One' is a nickname for Kronos, the God of Time who also happens to be the Father of Zeus.

It gives Natasha the advantage that she can cast continuously and use complex and powerful spells with the expenditure of very little "energy"; and she does not need a wand or other medium to focus them. The disadvantage is the fact that she has to verbally perform the spell chant for these spells and she has to remain relatively motionless which is the primary reason why her tactics revolve around her casting her spells at medium to long range.

I'm also sure that some people are going to jump all over me as to why vampires are so powerful when they seem to be a small, insignificant race in HP canon. Well, they're not. In my universe; the vampires who interact with wizards are Dhampirs—half human and half vampire.

Natasha on the other hand is a Pureblood Vampire and she is the most powerful of them all. I think of her as roughly being equivalent of a Kage-level Ninja. And before anyone else starts arguing against that; I personally think that Voldemort and Dumbledore both falling into around that same level power-wise.

In comparison, the really powerful wizards would rank around Jonin while above-average wizards would class around Chunin with the general Wizarding populace would fall in the Genin class.

It's just a rough classification; because I think that Wizards (even Voldemort and Dumbledore) are best in one-on-one combat with them spellcasting fast 'n furious at each other in a duel and they rarely engage in close quarters combat.

Ninjas on the other hand do not fight duels and they can break out bigger, army-killing, wide area affect jutsus, not to mention they resort to hand-to-hand combat and grappling which I think Wizards would view as "uncivilized brawling".

Most vampires, even pureblood vampires on the other hand—are only dangerous at close range; where they can get their hands or teeth on you. Sure, they're stronger and faster than a regular human—but they need to close that gap first and I think that with minimal warning, even a weak Wizard can hold them off with the basic Lumos. So don't be thinking that I think of vampires as being born as demigods or something like that. Natasha has spent centuries practicing and honing her spellcasting skills—but before anyone of you start whining about how can she kick Naruto's ass so easily—Naruto is several times stronger than a Kage and his human form is a kind of "limiter" on his power levels. Natasha is just able to push him to his limits in his human form, so I hope that explains things.