3am Rendez-Vous

~o~

September 2009

~o~

Lisbon's day had just gone from bad to worse. She was beyond shocked. She could not understand how her fingerprints had appeared on the murder weapon. Minelli didn't appear to completely believe her innocence. It hurt.

She shouldn't have been surprised that Jane walked in when Bosco was about to ask her some questions, but she was. She was not surprised, however, when he clearly showed his desire to stay. Secretly, she was glad that Jane was there. Even though he couldn't do anything, she felt his presence as something calming, something to hold onto.

She needed it, especially since she had to lie for the first question. She made sure not to look at Jane when she declared to have been at home, watching tv on Tuesday. It would have been harder to lie if she had been looking at him. When Bosco started to be more pressing, she couldn't help looking at Jane for reassurance, making herself more confident when telling her lie. Jane even ended up helping her out, which she was very grateful for. However, Bosco didn't seem to believe her and she started to panic when he mentioned a polygraph. There was no way she would go under a lie detector. She had her reputation to protect. What bad luck that the murder occurred on Tuesday night of all nights. She ended up leaving Minelli's office angry and frustrated. She couldn't believe Bosco and Minelli were doubting her innocence. On the other hand, she was really frustrated at her inability to defend herself properly.

About an hour later she got a text from Jane asking her to meet her at their usual coffee place. She sighed, annoyed. She knew what it would be about and she was even more annoyed at having to go out of her way to have this particular conversation with Jane.

~o~

She ordered a latte to go, ensuring that she could make a quick exit if there was need. Jane didn't arrive much later after she sat down. In normal circumstances, she would enjoy this: coffee outdoors with Jane on a beautiful day with a gorgeous view, but not today. Definitely not today.

"What's up that we couldn't talk inside? I'm busy."

"Thought you might want to be outside so you could express your anger without constraints."

"Why?"

"Why did you lie to Bosco about what you did on Tuesday night?" Jane asked as soon as he sat down.

"You know why."

"Teresa, this is a murder investigation."

She tried to remain calm, despite the fact that she had a very strong urge to throw her coffee in his face. "You don't think I know that? I didn't do it. You know I didn't do it. It will come out sooner or later and I don't have to drag my reputation through the mud."

"I could give you an alibi."

"Please everyone at the CBI knows that you would lie for me without a second thought. You're not much of an alibi. Even if I took the polygraph test, they wouldn't consider it a clean cut alibi. I will not jeopardize my reputation and career over whatever we have."

Jane leaned closer and looked directly into her eyes. "You're jeopardizing your reputation and career by not telling the truth, Lisbon."

"There is absolutely no guarantee that telling the truth will exonerate me, so for the meantime, I am sticking to my story."

Jane narrowed his eyes, but didn't break eye contact. "You're talking as if you were guilty."

"You're doubting my innocence as well? You were with me on Tuesday." She shook her head in disbelief, her shoulders slightly slouching.

"I was, which is my entire point. Why are you so willing to risk being accused of murder in order to keep our arrangement a secret? Are you afraid of what Minelli and Bosco will think of you if they knew?"

"Go to hell," she whispered angrily as she walked away.

~o~

"Jane."

He opened his eyes and looked up to see Lisbon standing at the end of the couch.

"You failed the polygraph."

She nodded.

"I suppose you came to apologize for being so stubborn."

She nodded and tried to keep the tears in. She felt powerless with all the accusations and secrecy and Jane was being a jackass, as usual.

"Want to go for a walk?" he asked gently. Maybe not that much of a jackass.

~o~

"Do you think it's possible that I left after you've fallen asleep and killed McTeer?" Lisbon asked as they entered her house. "Maybe I blocked out the murder because I don't want to remember it."

Jane walked into the kitchen and picked up her kettle. Opening one of her cupboards, he took out her tea box. He put water in the kettle and turned it on. As she watched him move around her kitchen, she wondered if he heard her question.

Finally, he turned around to look at her and answer her question. "It is possible, but you didn't kill McTeer."

"How would you know? You were asleep the whole night. I could have easily slipped out, killed McTeer and come back without you ever waking up. Dr. Carmen said that it's a possibility."

"So the Good Doctor knows about us?"

Lisbon nodded. "He guessed and I confirmed it today. He thinks I may have blocked out McTeer's murder in order to protect you."

Jane shook his head as he clarified his point of view: "I would have woken up if you had gotten out of bed." He took two mugs out and poured milk in one of them. Grabbing two teabags from the box, he put one in each mug.

"You sleep incredibly well after sex, Jane. I don't think you would wake up if I detonated a bomb next to you." She chuckled humorlessly. "Do you have any idea how many reports I've finished with you sleeping next to me? You never stir once."

"That's because you're there. For some reason, and please don't take this as a big romantic symbol, but I sleep better when you're close. It probably has something to do with the fact that you can fire a gun extremely well."

She shrugged. She was well aware that Jane was with her because it was comforting. She was also one of the rare people he trusted. She had stopped believing there would be anything more than friendship, and now sex, between them a long time ago.

"Six weeks ago," Jane continued, "you were about to leave early to answer a call, remember? You wanted to let me sleep some more before putting me on the case. I woke up as soon as you had left the bed."

The kettle whistled and Jane filled the mugs with boiling water.

Lisbon looked in the distance, trying to remember the morning he was talking about. She jogged her memory, thinking about the times they spent together over a month ago. She thought of the 'morning-after's, which usually varied from one to the next. Finally, she recalled an early morning call, Jane sleeping soundly next to her, not woken by the ringing of her cell phone, and her not having the courage to wake him up. "Oh yeah," she said as she remembered. She remembered how shocked she had been to see him awake, sitting up on the bed, when she had finished dressing.

Jane handed Lisbon her cup of tea. "I think you need this." She smiled gratefully.

"See," he said, "I sleep when you're not there, but not as well. I wake up every 15 minutes or so. There is no way you could have gone, killed McTeer and come back in 15 minutes. I'm sure you didn't do it, but, if you want, I could put you in a light trance…"

Lisbon shook her head vehemently. "No hypnosis Jane. I don't want you inside my head."

"I would make it quick and this way you would be sure. You'll feel so much better once you're sure."

Lisbon shook her head. "No thank you." She smiled at him. "There's something else I would rather be doing."

~o~

Jane had put her Spice Girls CD on as a joke. He had been trying to lighten up the mood, which had been very sweet of him, actually. She never had sex to 'Wannabe' before. It was a weird experience. As they laid on her bed, for once not falling asleep straight after, she tried not to think that the last time they had done this, McTeer was being killed.

"This is the fifth time we've done this at a time that wasn't between 2 and 4 o'clock in the morning."

She frowned. Jane was right. Usually they had sex because Jane couldn't sleep. It was as simple as that. She was his sleeping pill and her lack of sex life the last couple of years had made her more than willing to oblige. So Jane would usually crawl in her bed around 3am, and wake her up to do naughty things. Afterwards he would always sleep like a baby. They had, therefore, rarely slept together outside that early morning timeframe. The first time they didn't was actually the first time they slept together. That was after Jane shot Hardy. They had both needed it. Jane had surprisingly slept so well after the sex that he had easily figured out that sleeping with her helped him sleep. Since that day they had been sleeping together 2-3 times a week, nearly always early morning.

The second time they slept together outside early morning hours was her first meeting with Dr. Carmen. She had been so frustrated by not being signed off and having to come back again. As soon as she had been out of the Doctor's office, she called Jane up and asked him if he wanted to come over.

The third time had been the day they lost the Red John case. They did it in the car, right before he was meeting Bosco. They both had an extremely frustrating day and she had been the one needing to release some of the tension. She had parked on an empty side road right outside Sacramento and literally jumped him.

The fourth time had been Tuesday night. Dr. Carmen had started to ask many questions about her working habits and her team. She had been particularly annoyed when he had started to investigate the nature of her relationship with Jane.

"Hm, it happens when I'm annoyed."

"Don't you find it interesting that in the last four months, we have slept together about 50 times and the murder happened to be one of the rare times we slept together at a time other than 3am?"

She shrugged. "I guess."

"Hm," was all Jane said. "You sure I can't put you under a very short, light hypnosis? We'll know once and for all."

Lisbon grabbed her underwear and shirt. "Fine, but it better be quick."

Jane grinned. "Promise."

It was unbelievable the things she allowed him to do after they've had sex.

~o~

Jane and Lisbon were sitting in Lisbon's living room across from each other. Jane was talking in a very soft, soothing voice. "So you're going down the steps, relaxing with each step. Now you reach the bottom, the very last step, the ultimate place of calm. How are you feeling?"

"Good."

"Good. You're going to remain in this relaxed trance state. Only think about Tuesday night, but first: you liked having sex to that Spice Girls CD, didn't you?" He half-smiled, already knowing the answer.

"Yeah," Lisbon answered, smiling. She started dancing a little bit as if the music was playing in her head.

"I thought so. Now Tuesday. You're going to watch the whole day like it's a movie. Every detail is in focus. You can zoom into any moment you want. You can fast-forward, rewind. You are in total control, ok?"

"Ok," she said in a complete relaxed tone.

"Good. What do you see?"

"I'm finishing up the form 41s on the Noel Bank case. I feel hungry because I skipped lunch. The new guy in the mail room is hot."

"Is he?" Jane asked, curious.

"Yeah," she breathed out.

He wasn't jealous exactly, but he didn't like the fact that Lisbon noticed the new guy that way. He preferred moving on from that particular topic. "Let's fast-forward a little, later in the day. You're about to leave CBI."

"Van Pelt's working late. She's a hard worker. She might do well if she manages not to sleep with Rigsby."

"Where do you go now?"

"Home. You're already there when I arrive. I called you earlier. You could tell I needed you."

He couldn't resist asking. He had an idea why she had called him out of the blue to meet up, but he just wanted his suspicions confirmed. "Why did you?"

"I had an appointment with Dr. Carmen. He asked too many questions. I was annoyed."

Jane had thought as much. He nodded, even though Lisbon couldn't see it."What happens next?"

"We have sex on the kitchen table." Her lips curled a little at that and he couldn't help smiling back. "I'm worried it'll break," she added.

"But it didn't," he pointed out.

"No, it didn't."

"What did you do after that?" He knew, of course, but wanted to see what she would remember.

"I go to the bathroom to take a shower. When I come out you're already in bed, but you're not asleep yet."

"Do you see me fall asleep?"

She nodded. "Yes. You did as soon as I got in bed."

"What do you remember next?"

She frowned, looking unsure, but then answered: "Feeling sleepy."

"And then?" he prompted.

"I remember waking up," she says confidently. "I hear something. Someone's dressing." She paused and added: "It's you."

"Did you check your clock? Do you know what time it is?"

"Um… yes. Yes I did. It's 5:36am. You smile when you see me awake and you tell me you'll see me at the office."

Jane nodded, satisfied. He remembered as much.

"Good." He leaned forward and placed a hand on her forehead. "Open your eyes."

Lisbon opened her eyes and looked at Jane straight in the eye. "So, I didn't do it right?"

"You definitely didn't do it," he reassured her.

~o~

Lisbon dropped the bottle of rum she had in her hand. Prescription pills were scattered across her coffee table. Behind her Dr. Carmen was standing, trying to reason with her.

"You killed McTeer?" he asked her.

She swiftly turned around, displaying the gun she had in her hand as she did so.

"How the hell would I know? Maybe. I thought I was sleeping, but Jane was sleeping the whole time so he can't confirm it. Maybe I blocked it. Maybe I did it and the guilt made me block it out. Everyone I know: Jane, Minelli, my team, even Bosco will be disappointed and hurt."

Dr. Carmen looked scared. "Teresa, you want to put away your Glock there." He tried to use a calm tone, but wasn't succeeding.

"Very good eye Doctor. The Glock 9mm. The safety's at the trigger. How stupid is that? I mean, it's kind of not having a safety at all."

"How about you give it to me?" he asked as he extended a hand out.

She pointed the gun at him and he jumped, closing his eyes, scared. "Don't look at me like that." She waved the gun left and right. "Don't look at me like that. This is your fault."

Dr. Carmen opened his eyes again. "Teresa," was all he said.

"You unlocked too many things in my head and now I can't trust my own memories. My head is messed up and it's your fault."

"Teresa, put it down. You need to be calm and put down the gun."

"Calm?" Her voice pitched up. "You were right Doctor, there was something I wanted to tell you. I act calm on the outside, but on the inside I'm so angry I think I'm going to explode. All the pain and misery I see everyday makes me want to scream but I lock it down." Tears started to well up in her eyes and her voice was shaking. "I lock it down because I have to be calm and rational because that's my job. I also want to be there for Jane. He needs me. But I need him too. I need him and he still wears his wedding ring. Still, I have to stay calm, be his rock and be there for him. But I want to pull this trigger. I want to kill."

"You're angry. I hear that." Dr. Carmen said, trying to calm Lisbon down.

"I think I did it," she confessed. "I think I killed McTeer."

"Sshh, Teresa. If you did it, that's ok. He was a bad man. There's no need to hurt anyone else or yourself." His voice had become steadier. He was regaining control of the situation.

"I still can't remember."

"You can and you will. When you do, when you push through to the truth, all this weight and worry will come off your shoulders," he said in a hopeful tone.

"Ok," she whispered.

"I want you to visualize that scene for me. Relive that moment. You went into the alley after this terrible man. Can you see him?"

"No. Well, yes," she hesitated. "Maybe."

"Yes, you see him. You see the dumpsters, and the trash and the crumbling old bricks and you see McTeer." He's getting excited. "You see him, there, this monster who has destroyed so many lives. It's too much. See it Teresa. Live it. The weak, the garbage, the filthy alley walls, the faded cross there. God may have mercy on William McTeer, but you sure as hell wouldn't." His tone is now focused and in control. "He deserved to die, but you're still a good person, Teresa. You can get through this."

"The cross?"

"The what?" Dr. Carmen asked, confused.

Lisbon's tone is now calm for the first time since Dr. Carmen had walked in her house. "The cross, Roy. How did you know about the cross? It was inside the door; only the killer saw it."

"Well, Teresa, you told me about the crime scene."

"No, I didn't."

As Dr. Carmen began to realize the implications of her statement, Jane, sitting on the stairs that lead to Lisbon's bedroom, exclaimed, "Oh, beautifully done. Lovely work, Lisbon," he praised her as he got up and walked down the stairs.

"Wha?" Dr. Carmen appeared confused.

Jane ignored it and continued, "Of course, the cross. You couldn't resist the imagery, could you, doc? Catholic, perhaps?"

"What's going on?" Dr. Carmen asked.

"Surrender, Dorothy, we got you. Brilliant though, make Lisbon come back week after week for months so you would get her fingerprints off your coffee mug. You kept talking about the Hardy incident, making sure I was always part of the conversation, picking up on every detail she would give you about me and our relationship. You knew all along that we've been seeing each other. You probably followed us a few times, figured out when we were together, realized that since we're usually sleep-deprived, we always fall asleep straight after. Probably noticed that Lisbon and I got together outside early morning hours only when she was really irritated about something. Last Tuesday, you made sure she would be especially exasperated with you." He looked at Lisbon. "You knew she would call me and you knew she would conceal our relationship, which made her fail the polygraph. Quite the student of human nature, huh Doctor? Well done, really," he complimented as he turned back toward Dr. Carmen.

"Your breakdown in CBI, that was fake?" Dr. Carmen asked Lisbon.

Jane and Lisbon's gaze locked. "And how good was that? Huh?" Jane said proudly as she smiled at him. "What about that?" Jane broke eye contact and looked back at the doctor. "After that all I had to do was get Minelli to get you to come around here."

"I've been waiting for you all night."

"There was one little thing, one little thing," Jane pointed out. "Counting on us sleeping through the night, that was a little risky. When Lisbon isn't next to me, my sleep is always much lighter. I would have known if she had gone. When Lisbon couldn't remember doing anything after we fell asleep, even under hypnosis, I knew she couldn't have done it. The rest of it, spot on. Very, very impressive."

"Thanks," Dr. Carmen said bitterly.

"Not at all," Jane said seriously. Even if he was giving a slightly light-hearted speech, he was angry as hell for trying to frame Lisbon. And so was she.

She punched the doctor square in the face.

"You're under arrest," she said to him as she cuffed him. "You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say or do can and will be used against you in court. You have the right to an attorney…"

~o~

"I hear Minelli's billing you for the glass," Bosco said to Lisbon from the threshold of her office.

"It's only fair," she replied, smiling, thinking back to her fake meltdown and the insane genius behind it.

"You know for a cop, you make a very convincing lunatic." Bosco paused as he walked in. The next words seem almost hard for him to let them out. "Jane must be proud."

"Maybe it's not good police work, but I have to confess: I enjoyed it. Letting loose for once."

"Look, I'm glad you got cleared," Bosco told her.

A knot began to form in her stomach. Guilt started to rise up and she wondered what Bosco would say if he knew about her and Jane. "I'm sorry that we couldn't let you in on the plan."

"You could have, but you didn't." He walked towards her until he was standing right in front of her. She felt uncomfortable, having him standing so close. "You should know," he adds, "that if it had turned out to be you…"

"I know," she confirms.

"So you do. Enough said."

She was sure that Bosco wouldn't have stood so close or said the things he just said had he known about her and Jane. Speaking of the devil, Jane strode into the office, completely unabashed.

"I'm not interrupting, am I?" he asked, knowing full well he was. Lisbon started to think that Jane might have a very, very small jealous streak.

"No," Bosco quickly replied. "Good night Lisbon," he told her as he walked out.

"Good night Sam," Jane said as he half followed Bosco on his way to the door, almost making sure the man was leaving them alone. Lisbon chose to ignore this unusual display of jealousy. The two of them had had enough on their plates the last few days.

"Doughnuts from Marie's." Jane indicated the white paper bag he was holding.

"Ah," Lisbon said appreciatively as she took the bag from him. Jane glanced back outside her office, at Bosco's retreating form.

"I didn't see it," he said as he kept looking outside her office. "Of course," he added, finally looking at her.

"What?" Lisbon asked, digging in the bag to get a doughnut. She took a bite as soon as she got a hold of one.

"He's in love with you," Jane explained.

"Don't be silly."

"I know, hard to fathom, but there's no accounting for taste, is there?"

"Hush," she ordered as she threw the bag of doughnuts at him. He caught it and walked out.

Jane turned around and poked his head back. After watching her rummaging through her box for a second, he said: "I'll come by later?"

She looked up from the box and smiled. "Sure, around 2am?"

He grinned. "How about we make it midnight for a change?"

~o~

The end.