Author's Note

Well, by reading the title, any Good HTF fan will have guessed what's going on in this story. The first chapter is going to be basically "I Nub You" the latest HTF episode, though I'm going to switch it up a bit, and give it a bit more substance. Now for those of you who saw the episode and read some of my other stories, I'm only giving ONE hint about what's going to happen. Chunky IS in fact going to be playing a prominent role in this tale, as well as his relationship (Wink Wink Nudge Nudge)

But enough chitter-chatter, let's get down to the heartbreaking trag-,er I mean love story.

She Nubs Me, She Nubs Me Not:

A "Funny Love" Story.

Set the scene on a small house in Happy Tree Town, a bright day, mid-summer in fact. The front door swings open briskly and out strolls Petunia, on her way to pick up the mail. It was such a beautiful day she couldn't help but whistle and even began to skip down to her mailbox. She swung it open and pulled out the letters, quietly humming a familiar tune as she walked back up to her house to read the mail. Flipping through it, she found a little postcard from her boyfriend, Chunky the Koala. He was new around town, but they had gotten quite close over the half a year she knew him. He was off in Hawaii, it was his Uncle Disco Bear's idea, but was always keeping in touch. Her eyes scanned the card and she quietly read it aloud.

Dear Petunia

It's hot as ever down here, but as you can guess Uncle Disco still thinks he's hotter. (She giggled a little and kept reading). It must sound crazy, but I'm actually learning to surf. A local convinced me to, a cute little raccoon girl. She looked a few years younger than me, but gosh she can surf. But, I can somewhat balance, so good news there. Anyway, I just wanted to let you know how we were doing, and to thank you again for taking care of Disco's Parakeet. Remember, if anyone asks, it's mine (His words exactly).

Love, Chunky.

Petunia turned the card over and quietly laughed at the picture on front. Chunky stood in the foreground, with a bathing suit and a surfboard in hand, and Disco, in the background was unsuccessfully flirting with a Hula Dancer. She was about to go back to sorting the mail when it hit her.

"Oh, the parakeet!" She hurried over to the cage and was relieved to find the little green bird was still okay. "I guess you need some food then." She squatted down and picked up the large bag of birdseed, and unclasped the cage to grab the bird's food dish, but the second she did, it flew out of the cage.

"OH! Come back here you, get back in the cage!" She jumped up and down trying to catch the bird, but it circled the room just out of her reach before it landed on the open windowsill across the room.

"Eek! Stay away from there birdie!" She said, leaping at the bird to catch it before it flew off. In an instant, she snatched it up right before it flew off. Feeling the bird in her hands, she let out a sigh of relief, right before the window unclasped, and snapped down on her elbows, severing them in one quick blow. Petunia shrieked in horror, stumbling backwards staring at the nubs of her arms as they gushed blood all over the floor. In her terrified stupor, she tripped over the seeds that had fallen to the ground as the bird escaped and smashed the back of her head on the end table that held the bird's cage. Suddenly, the room was silent, and Petunia lay there gushing blood from her arms, and now her head. It seemed like our story would end here.

But no, it gets much more exciting. Petunia, half expecting the inky blackness to engulf her, and to dream until she was revived, as it always had. And she was not wrong, she did dream in a deep darkness, but it was different. Normally she had dreamt of meadows, or drifting through the clouds, but this was no dream. Everything was painfully dark, darker than usual, and it was hot. Her body was wet with sweat and blood, and the earth rocked back and forth beneath her. Muffled voices could be heard, then she began to move quickly, then nothing but a constant beeping noise that drove her nearly mad. Until her eyes blinked open and she felt the air around her to cease the noise, expecting to hit her alarm clock.

"Now hold on sweetie, don't go moving those around too much." She heard a voice, Sniffles, and turned to find him beside her.

"Snif, sniff-" She stuttered, almost gasping for breath.

"Don't talk dear, you're in the hospital. I guess you don't remember much, after bonking your head like that. I suppose you must remember the first accident, after all, losing your hands isn't something to take lightly."

She gasped and held up her arms in shock, realizing that they were nothing but bandaged nubs. "Oh my God, oh my God. I didn't just die?"

"Thankfully no, you were rescued before you bled out. I suppose that can be considered very lucky." Sniffles flipped through a hospital chart, "but you've lost a lot of blood, you should definitely stay here for a little while, at least a day."

"But, but who rescued me?"

"He's waiting right outside. Are you sure you can handle visitors yet?"

"Please, I need to thank him." She said, barely sitting up. Sniffles nodded and motioned towards the door. She turned to find Handy walking in, carrying his helmet in his nubs as a display of modesty, and Lumpy, his usual foolish grin was actually more mild, as if he was still nervous about her condition. Petunia gave a weak, but sincere smile as they entered.

"Oh you guys, I can't thank you enough. C'mere you two," She held out her nubs and they both approached, giving them as much of a hug as she could in her current state.

Lumpy blushed, recoiling quickly, "D'aww shucks, I hardly did anything, Handy was the one who found you an' all, honest."

"Yeah," Handy blushed, " I heard the crash and came to investigate, when I saw you I went and got Lumpy and we loaded you into his wheelbarrow."

She gasped at the thought of being dropped in a filthy wheelbarrow, but overcame it to be polite, "Oh thank you, that's so sweet…"

"Yeah, I figured you'd appreciate it, even if death isn't such a big deal around here."

"Well, I do, it was a lovely gesture." She looked at her own nubs, "And maybe, since you've managed to live so well without hands, maybe I could walk a mile in your shoes per say?"

"I wouldn't mind showing you the ropes, if you wouldn't mind me teaching." Handy blushed and looked away.

"I'd love it, perhaps when I get out you could take me home and maybe, show me how to eat?"

Handy leapt at the idea, "Ruh-really? I mean, uh, if you'd like it. Heck, I've even learned to cook pretty well with these nubs." Lumpy smiled proudly at his friend, but Sniffles gave a confused look.

"That sounds lovely Handy, but, if you'll excuse me, I'm a little sleepy." She gave a sly wink in Sniffles' direction, and he took the hint.

"Yes yes, please leave her alone for now, she needs her rest!" Sniffles shooed them both out, before turning and closing the door behind him. He sat on the end of the bed, and gave her a questioning glance.

"What do you think you're doing Pet, you're with Chunky, don't you remember? This isn't like you," He rolled his eyes and sighed angrily, "Don't tell me YOU'VE got two sides too? How many of us does that make?"

"Sniffles, please, I'm just repaying his kind act. Can't you see, Handy's live his entire life being taken care of, being labeled as a "Handycap". That's why he likes building, it proves to himself he's still useful. I could just as easily die and come back with hands, but this way I'm making Handy happier than he's been in years!"

Sniffles stood and shook his head, " Petunia, he really likes you, please don't break his heart."

"I couldn't, I won't. I'm just giving him a friend, and a purpose, at least for a little while."

"Petunia," Sniffles approached the hospital room's lights, "You're a smart girl, please be careful with this though, it may seem like just a nice gesture to you, but he really thinks you love him."

"Sniffles, that's not a problem. I'd only have to worry if I loved him back." Petunia said, laying down and closing her eyes softly.

"Sometimes, I wonder." Sniffles said, switching off the lights.

OOooooooh, things are gonna get JUICY! So, just a starter, I know I have other stories to be working on, but I needed to cash in on this one in particular, for obvious reasons. And once again, anyone interested in who Chunky is, check out his starring roles in "What's Eating You" "Love Stinks" and "Family Reunion"

Ladies and Gentlemen, GOODNIGHT!