Title: Antithesis
Characters/Pairing: Sakura, Tsunade, hints of SasuSaku
For: Mrie. SORRY FOR THE EXTREME LATENESS. It must have been a year or so since I was supposed to have written this and I won't be surprised if you have forgotten all about it.
Prompt: A lost scene, a mirror, a flower, a missed punch, a connected punch
A/N: The prompts are used, but in an...indirect, have to look into it way. Also, this was rather hard to write.
Summary: She promises her team will end up differently, and Tsunade tries not to hope.
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The main reason, Sakura thinks, that she and Tsunade are able to get so close is that they both nurse broken hearts. True, Tsunade might have seen something in her, something inspiring and brilliant and wanted to nurture it. Maybe she even wanted to develop this talent, maybe she wanted to do something for once.
However, the main reason has to be their broken hearts. Sakura can see it clearly--in the bags under Tsunade's eyes, in the shadow under her smile, in the delicate brown in her hair. It's not very apparent but now that she can see it, Sakura doesn't understand why it isn't obvious.
A broken heart is a very easy thing to disguise. It can be hidden within layers of words and actions but in the end it reveals itself through those layers.
"You'll have to work hard, you know," Tsunade tells her, regarding her carefully, "You won't be getting help, only instruction. "
This is a warning. Sakura's smart enough to see that.
"I will."
However, Sakura isn't smart enough to see that this is also a statement.
-x-
Tsunade doesn't really like teaching. She did it once with Shizune and swore off it ever since. Too many mornings were spent waking up at four am, drinking lukewarm tea.
She hates coffee--it's too bitter, too much like life.
Saké is better but it is impossible to drink saké and teach at the same time. Something gets muddled and it only results in more teaching.
Sakura isn't that hard to teach--she's a quick-learner. She grasps the lessons easily but she's terrible at application. That might be why Kakashi abandoned her so easily. Sakura is the kind of student you want when you think of teaching but not when you are actually teaching. While she can do thinks perfectly technically, she has no idea of what to do when she is a battle. Everything has to follow a plan for her to succeed.
This is where, presumably, Tsunade comes in. She's here to put the skills to the test.
Really, though, she's here because there is something in Sakura that reminds her of another, foolish little girl. One who also lost her teammates and her love and had to make do without them.
(And that is what she did, made do with her mismatched, broken family.)
Don't expect much, Tsunade wants to tell her. Sasuke is like Orochimaru, good at breaking things and horrible at putting them back together. He just doesn't know how, and that is why they both will fail. They either won't achieve their goals or they won't know what their goal is, just driven to do something.
Instead, she tells her, "Sakura, you need to practice dodging more. A wounded medic is useless."
Maybe this will teach Sakura to protect her heart.
-x-
Sakura doesn't talk about Sasuke to Tsunade. Except for when she does, which is nearly always. It isn't obvious every time, it just slips out.
"Sasuke likes tomatoes, you know? Once, we were working on a farm and I saw him take one. A small one, one that probably wouldn't be used, but still...he seemed almost...I don't know...like Naruto and his ramen. Only with more control. " Sakura tells Tsunade when they're resting after practice. A bright red flower catches her eye. "Naruto, he lives off ramen. He swallows it like there's no tomorrow."
It figures that Naruto sneaks in her conversations, as though he's trying not to be forgotten.
They get up and start the exercise again.
-x-
Tsunade sometimes talks about Jiraiya and Orochimaru. There are too many similarities between her team and team seven for her to not.
(She wonders if she'll ever be able to leave the shadow they cast, ever be able to stop seeing them in others.)
"Sasuke's not like that," Sakura argues back hotly, her face flushed. "And Naruto wouldn't give up just like that!"
"It's not called giving up, it's called accepting facts, " Tsunade responds, her fingers digging into the desk.
"You gave up too easily!"
"Do you think you are the only ones who suffered loss?" Tsunade gives a short bark. "Grow up. Not everything will be peachy perfect."
She's bitter. Tsunade knows that but can't hide it all the same. Sakura had no idea how hard she tried. There were long nights and scorching days, times when she and Jiraiya only had each other. That was never enough--her shell was too tough to let her connect with him and he always tried to remain too detached. They could never connect as a team and it was only fitting that they never remained one.
Eventually, they had to give up. Eventually, they had to realize that the Orochimaru they knew didn't exist anymore. Maybe he never existed.
"It won't be perfect but we'll make it work!" Sakura announces, before storming out the doors. Tsunade doesn't chase (never does anymore) and watching the door slam shut.
The problem with Sakura and Naruto, she realizes, is that they try too hard. So much that she almost wants to give in and believe. They might be able to do it, they might succeed where others failed.
Tsunade doesn't want to hope. It only leads to disappointment.
-x-
Her fingers are calloused, covered in bruises that formed over time and effort. That is something she never knew as a child. She just never tried back then.
It's amazing how hard work feels, how success feels, after all the energy she put in. Naruto gapes at her in shock and Kakashi for once looks at her.
(See, I can help the team. See, I am not a waste of time. Look at what you missed.)
"Sakura-chan, that's....amazing..."
Amazing? She almost smirks. They haven't seen nothing yet.
-x-
It isn't enough. While she might have progressed in hops and jumps, Sasuke improved in leaps and bounds. He is far, too far, for anyone to catch up.
He always has been. What was she thinking? It is impossible for her to reach his level, Naruto is the only one with that chance, and yet she tried to hit him.
Tried to make him look at her (Don't just slide your eyes over me, don't just ignore me) and failed miserably.
It's at times like this when she thinks that Tsunade-shishou might be right.
-x-
This is what comes from hope, Tsunade thinks when Sakura sits in front of her, crying. She doesn't want to do it in front of Naruto (he already feels bad enough as it is and I made him make that stupid promise and--) and she can't do this alone, so Tsunade has to sit there and watch Sakura break.
"We weren't enough...I was still too weak to do anything..." Tears wear away at her face and Tsunade half-wants to tell her, give up already. Give up now, before he gives you wrinkles and creases on your face, gives your heart a permanent crack.
"Of course you were, you're still my apprentice." Tsunade scoffs. "You can't expect to beat him if you haven't beat me yet."
"..." Sakura stops crying, staring at her with impossibly bright eyes.
This is exactly why Tsunade hates hope--it gives expectations, ideas of grandeur and victory that won't happen.
Yet, it makes life somewhat bearable.
"Why are you still here? You haven't finished warming up yet."
-x-
This time, she's ready. This time, Sakura will go in and drag him out. He might flit about, he might move faster than her, but this time, it will work.
This time, they will work together. She'll distract and Naruto will attack and somewhere along the line they will get Sasuke. They can't fail, who knows when they'll get another chance.
Who knows how deep he'll fall if they don't pull him back now. If he steps further into the dark, it might be too far to reach.
She smiles at Naruto, his eyes bright with confidence, and they move. Quickly, stealthily, eagerly, they chase. Even with Sasuke's distractions and traps, they follow.
They're good at that.
-x-
"We just missed him. " Unlike last time, Sakura doesn't break down. She instead growls and stamps her feet, irritated. "We were so close, and then that Tobi stopped us. "
This always happens, Tsunade almost says, something will get in the way over and over until it seems futile to keep trying.
This is where Sakura nearly breaks down. "We...we let him slip through our hands. He was there, right there, and we could have found him. We lost him, again."
Her voice wobbles and her eyes blink quickly, but Sakura doesn't crumple up and cry. She curls her hand into a fist, sinking her nails in her skin, and glares at the floor.
Tsunade's proud of her for that. Proud of that strength that she now has. This is why she starts to hope and believe and think that maybe, just maybe, things might work out.
This team is different, in that Sakura still worries over Naruto and Naruto sometimes asks Sakura out for dinner. They reminisce and constantly talk about what they'll do to Sasuke when he comes back and...
They remain a team.
Of course, she doesn't say any out this aloud.
-x-
"Tsunade-shisou..." Sakura whispers, holding Tsunade's hand. There is no response, only the feeling of a weak heat. "Please....wake up." She knows it's futile to expect this to work, she is a medic after all, but she tries again. "You know Naruto will try to take over your office. It'll smell like ramen if you don't wake up soon."
There still is no response, Tsunade's eyes shut. Shizune stays on the other side, Tonton in her arms, and both women try hard not to cry.
Tsunade would never like that.
"I'll...I'll work on her," Shizune says quietly, not looking at Sakura. She stares resolutely at Tsunade's hands, the signs of age slowly appearing on them.
"Shizune..."
"I'll bring her back, so you can focus on--" Bringing your team back together, are the unspoken words. "--what's going on now."
Sakura stares at her for a moment before nodding. Her hands squeeze Tsunade's one more time. "I'll bring Sasuke back, just you wait and see. We'll be a team again. We'll make this work. Just wait and see."
With that promise, she leaves her master's side.
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