Author's Note : I'm trying to be brave and post this on my own. If something's not right, I promise to holler for help the next time. *Pssst, unlikelyRLshipper, you are there, right?* I really want to thank everyone that has reviewed and tab my stories in their "favourites". Your comments means so much. Thank you.
Disclaimer : I only own the spelling mistakes and grammatical errors in this story but not anything of CSI NY.
Summary : Looking at DaLinds relationship before and after Danny said "I love you". (Sorry if that sounded too clinical.)
From Which Episode : Triangle (after they left Mac's office), Personal Foul (after she said, "I gotta go") and Forbidden Fruit (before their shift starts)
"So, you love me?"
"You just want to hear me say it again, don't you?"
"Is that so bad?" Lindsay started swinging their hands that had been entwined since they left Mac's office. She gave him her adorable smile that had been his downfall since the day she said "Hi" to his "That be me Danny Messer. How you're doing?" that day at the zoo.
Looking down at the mother of his child, he pulled her close to place a quick triple kiss on her forehead. Each punctuated with a whispered "I love you". Then he gave her a kiss that left her spinning. He pulled back when she started to moan.
"I think we better.." he started to say but she grabbed his shirt and stood on tip-toes for another taste of him.
"Hmmmm," smiling at him with her eyes half-closed, still holding on to his shirt front.
"What?"
"You. You taste of coffee."
"Excuse me?"
"Coffee on your lips. Makes me want to..." she released his shirt and pulled him towards the locker room.
"Montana? Mac may have just given us his blessing but .."
"Shut up Messer. Remember what I told you about my cravings?"
"This have anything to do with your fantasy of me in the locker room?" he started grinning.
"Danny!!"
***
"So you love me right?"
"You are just asking me that cause you want my doughnut." His eyes narrowed as he held his share of sugar covered doughnut near his mouth.
"Please?"
"Linds, you already had three!"
"Yeah but its all coffee. Now I want something sweet. Please?"
"Uh-uh. Next you'll be telling me that the kid wants it." He sighed but started to tear his share in two. He leaned across the break room table and offered her the half.
It was just half hour ago that she dragged him down to the corner bakery to appease her coffee flavored doughnut craving. They would have gone home but it had started to rain. They decided to go back to the lab and sit the rain out.
Lindsay took the offered half and looked down at her belly. "See how Daddy loves us? Say 'thank you Daddy.'" She then took his hand and placed it on her stomach. Danny was surprised at the move and an overwhelmed feeling spread through his body. He gulped.
"Is he moving yet?"
"He?"
"No offense Lindsay, but there's no girl I know that could eat three doughnuts yet still OUCH!"
She slapped his shoulder. "This just confirms that this is your child..." she playfully continued but Danny suddenly turned serious.
"I've never doubt that for a minute Linds. You're too good for me." He kissed her knuckles and placed one on her palm before searching her face, "I'm sor.."
Lindsay placed her finger against his lips and shook her head. "Don't. We've talked about this. No looking back, remember? Now its just you, me and our baby. Fresh start, okay?"
"Baby steps?"
"Baby steps." She smiled. "I love you." She smiled wider.
"That last doughnut is mine Montana."
"Smarty pants," she pouted.
"You're just too cute for profanity, aren't you?" He fielded her move to smack his shoulder again. Chuckling, he handed her the last doughnut before throwing the packaging and the used napkins away. She offered him a bite when he pulled her off the chair.
"Come on. Let me get you home." He stood still when she wiped access sugar from his chin with her thumb.
"Whose home?" she inquired as she licked the sugar off her thumb while looking at him through her lashes.
"You're saying?" He asked cautiously.
"You've got clothes at my place" she hinted.
"You sure about this?"
She nodded.
"What about the baby steps thing?"
"Danny, I told you that just because I said no, doesn't mean I won't." She gave him a coy smile.
"And...?"
"And I have not been sleeping well. I thought maybe you could stay with me. Give me a foot massage...."
"You're not just using me, are you?"
"Danny!" she gasped.
"I know. I know. Just kidding. Come here." He pulled her in for a quick kiss. "I'll take care of you, Doll."
"Doll? You've been talking to Flack?"
He winked. "Don't worry he's too busy with his Jess to get back at you right now." At her surprised face, he quickly added, "Yeah! Yeah! Let's keep it between us okay? Don't wanna get them in trouble."
"I'm so happy for them!!" she squeaked and shook his arm.
"Yeah," Danny smiled. "Right, back to what we were saying......?"
"I heard that reading is good for the baby. I just thought that maybe she.."
"She?"
"Or he would want to hear your voice too."
"Crime stories?" he grinned.
"Danny.."
"Have you been reading to him" he caught her look and quickly added "or her?"
"Yeah. My favorite fairy tales."
"Whoa! Fairy tales?!?!?"
"Why not?"
"Nothing. Just thought the kid needs more adventure."
"So you're suggesting..?"
"Just leave it to me Montana."
"Am I gonna like this?"
"You have no faith in me?"
"Danny, I know you" she said and looked down.
"What's that supposed to mean?" A cold sense of deja vu crawled down his back. He stood in front of her, arms on his chest and legs spread apart. Frowning. The Messer stance that always had Lindsay secretly falling on her knees.
"It means I don't expect ..."
He took a step closer that forced her to look up into his eyes.
"It means I don't expect you to have anything less than a Batman or a Flash Gordon comic in your bag always." She started to giggle.
"You like playing me, don't you Miss Monroe?"
"Oh yes Detective," she tiptoed to whisper in his ear, "especially in the rain."
***
FLASHBACK
"Ah! No! You gotta be kidding me!" Lindsay cried in dismay at the sign that said the train station is closed for repairs. She has been talking a rain walk to ease her mind and think straight about her situation with Danny. He had called earlier to say that he misses her and had invited her over.
Her walk had taken her a long way from her apartment. Unconsciously, her steps were taking her to Danny's. Realizing that, she made her way to the nearest train station. Only to find it closed. She looked around and saw a taxi cruising by. While deciding if she should take the risk, with the Killer Cabbie still on the loose, the taxi stopped to pick up a passenger in front of her. "Maybe that should tell me something." She mumbled to herself.
Her phone rang. Danny's face appeared on the ID caller for the second time that evening. She smirked.
"Hey."
"Danny." She sighed.
"Are you home yet?"
"No."
"Where are you Lindsay?" he asked, sounding worried.
"I'm at Street Station but its closed" she growled. "Danny, there's a cab.."
"LINDSAY NO!!!!!" he yelled down the phone line.
"Dan.."
"Lindsay. Don't even think about it. Stay where you are and I'll come and get you."
"Danny it's raining really bad. If I can't get into a cab, same goes for you."
"Linds, I'll be okay.." he tried to reason.
"Why? Just because you're a guy? Just because you're tough that you can handle anything that comes your way? Why is it you can worry about me but I can't about you? Why do you hurt me so much? Why won't you let me in damn it!?!?" she suddenly stopped her tirade.
"Lin..."
"Sorry. Look. I was going to your place but now" she sighed, "I just want to go home."
"Lindsay, please. I..okay, alright, you don't have to come over. But please let me take you home." He pleaded.
"With what Danny? Don't you dare say on your bike! You know how I feel about you riding when it's raining."
"Alright, I won't take my bike, okay? I'll find another way. Just say you'll wait for me." Using the tone he used earlier that evening he added, "Please?" And more softly, " Linds?"
"Yeah, I'll wait," she sounded defeated. "Just get yourself here safely Danny."
Twenty minutes later, she saw him. She had said that he was a hard man to love. But looking at him then, as he ran towards her clutching an umbrella like a bat, she marveled at that extra space that her heart still has for him. Not loving him is like admitting the Batmobile is better than Mach 5. Highly impossible.
Soaked and breathless, he stood in front of her and huffed a "Hey."
"Messer did you run all the way from your place?" She grabbed on to his jacket to pull him to stand next to her under the shop awning.
"No." He took a few deep breaths. "I took the train....stopped a station down and walk....er...it started as a walk but ...I don't wanna keep you waiting so I ran ....you okay?"
She nodded. And gave in to her own smirk. "You?"
He nodded. Straightening himself and bouncing on his feet, "So you wanna go home now?"
"Yeah." She raised her eyebrow when he opened the umbrella and held his arm out.
"Come on, let's get you out of the rain Montana." She stiffened slightly at her nickname which did not escape Danny's attention.
"It's a little too late for that Danny. I'm already soaked from my rain walk."
"Well, let me show you rain walk the New York way." he beckoned her with his fingers. She shook her head but stepped into the safety of his arms and they begin walking.
"What do you mean by the New.....eeeekkkkkk!!!" she shrieked and ducked her head under his chin.
Danny's reaction was fast. He hugged her to his chest and lowered the umbrella to shield them from the splashing caused by a passing truck.
"That's the New York way." He winked as she peeked at him.
"My hero," she sighed, batting her eyes at him.
"Wiseass." He smirked and kissed her lips.
She stiffened and gasped at the contact. He pulled back and muttered, "Linds. I'm sorry. I didn't...I don't have the right..I'm sorry..I..Linds..I hurt you... I never meant to...I'm sorry. I'.."
He stopped when she grabbed his shirt and shook him slightly. She called his name till he looked at her. He was biting his lower lip and breathing heavily.
"Danny, listen." She closed her eyes for a moment and placed her open palm on his chest. "I know you're sorry. I know that you never meant to hurt me. I know that you needed time to work things out. I know how lost you were. I can understand if you did things that's ...stupid.." she continued quickly when he was about to interrupt. "No. Don't say anything. I've been down that road and I should know. It's just a way of dealing, maybe. You don't have to say anything."
"Lindsay.."
"Danny, sshhh," she placed a finger against his lips. "What I don't know won't hurt me. Maybe, I don't want to know. But there is one thing that I need you to tell me honestly."
"What?" he whispered.
She lowered her hands to her sides.
"Do you still want us?"
"More than anything."
She smiled. A tear promising to fall at the corner of her eye caught his attention.
He smiled back. He reached out gently and captured the single tear.
"It may not be easy. We may not be the same as we used to. You know that right?" Resting her head against his palm that was cradling her jaw.
"We'll get through it together, Mon...Linds." As her smile suddenly disappeared. "What?"
"I missed that" she admitted shyly.
"I missed it too" he said softly.
They both took a step forward and closed whatever space there was between them. Their kiss was tender and gentle. It was unlike the surprising kiss they shared in the hospital hallway or the sweet one that they had in Montana nor the wild one after their pool game. This one holds a promise of working out whatever that's coming their way, together.
"I'll never hurt you again." He promised the second their kiss ended.
"I know you won't." She pulled his head down to rest their forehead together. "Take us home Danny."
"Us?"
"Us. Us." Pointing towards him and herself. "Relax Cowboy, it's only you and me."
END OF FLASHBACK
***
They got back to Lindsay's apartment and had dinner. Danny had dinner but Lindsay wanted a breakfast menu. Danny made her eggs and toast. They then rested on the couch where Danny began to read his comics to his unborn child. After a while, he realized a change in Lindsay's face.
"Pssstt, Kiddo," Danny turned his head which was on Lindsay's lap, towards her stomach. "Lesson Number 1 : When Mommy have that kind of look. Something is not right."
"That's what makes your Daddy a great CSI Sweetie" she smiled sadly.
"Spill Montana" he got up and sat next to her.
"I need to leave you.."
"WHAT?!?!?" He sprung up from the couch. Thrusting his fingers into his hair. "No!"
"Baby, Baby calm down." She reached forward as far as her stomach would allow and grabbed his pants as he passed by her for the third time. She pulled him down to sit on the coffee table in front of her. "Danny, listen to me. I told my parents about my pregnancy and they want me to go back for a bit. That's all. I'll be back." She soothed him, rubbing the side of his thighs. "Okay?"
"You'll be back?"
She nodded.
"You won't leave us?"
"Us?"
"Us. Us." Pointing to her and himself. And then to her belly.
"I'll be back for us," She gently tapped his cheek.
"How long will you be gone?" He suddenly panicked again. "You're not leaving tomorrow are you?"
"Not for another few weeks. Then I'll be there for about a week or two."
"Two weeks is fourteen days. That's lots and lots of hours. How about just a week? One short week? Please?" He pleaded.
"I don't know. Maybe if I get bored or decide that I miss you, I'll come back early."
"You're mean Montana." He kissed her forehead despite saying that. "Did they freaked out when you told them?"
"Wouldn't every parent? Mom asked if she," she rolled her eyes at Danny's peaked eyebrow, "or he, is yours. When I told them yes, Daddy said something about welcoming you with open arms."
"His arms are attached to big hands, Babe."
"I know. I've seen him roped and tied down bulls bigger than him lots of times. Using his bare hands he can twist the neck...."
"Psst Kiddo!" He bent forward to whisper to his unborn child, "Lesson Number 2 : Mommy may be small but she can be pretty scary OUCH!"
"Have you told your parents?"
"Yeah. My Ma hit me just like you did when I told her about the proposal."
"She doesn't like me, huh?"
"You kidding?!? She loves you! She's glad that it's you."
"Then why did she hit you?"
"For proposing to you on the sidewalk. With you holding a doughnut." He answered sheepishly.
Lindsay could not help but laugh. Looking at her, an uneasy feeling washed over him. Reaching for her hand he turned serious suddenly.
"Linds?" She stopped laughing but kept her smile. "You will marry me but just not right now, right?"
Looking at the fear and uncertainty in his eyes, she nodded.
"I love you."
"I love you too Danny." She then pulled his hand to stand up. "Come on let's get some sleep." She pulled him towards her bedroom.
"Lindsay..."
"Danny, it's okay. I want you to be with me." Pointing to herself and her belly. "We want you to be with us."
"I'll stick to you guys like glue," he took her in his arms. "When I'm at work, maybe Kiddo here will kick you to say he's missing me."
"He?"
"Or she."
THE END
Hope you enjoyed that.