Okay so just recently my love for KND and AbbyxHoagie slapped me in the face and since I have a raging passion for music as well I decided to meld my first KND fic with some songs thus coming up with some songfics. Hopefully I don't disappoint nobodies…

I also dedicate this first story to blue-eyed-blonde12
(Thanks for reviving my love of 2/5 with your fics)

Chapter One: Cartoon
(By Skye Sweetnam)

"…and then the duck said, just put it on my bill!" Hoagie laughed openly. A long groan came from the coffee skinned girl before she lowered her head, snatching her red hat off in the process. Years of experience told Hoagie what would happen next, but before he was given the opportunity to duck or just plain out run, She wacked him across the face with the tattered old red hat.

"How many times does Abby have to tell you, your jokes ain't funny!?" She exclaimed replacing her hat on her head.

"I think this is the billionth time in the last six months." He commented cheekily before grinning at her. Abby was not fazed by the boyish expression. Sixteen years old and she still saw the ten year old Numbuh 2 she had become so close to. She had to force herself not to smile. "C'mon Abs, you love my jokes."

"As much as I love getting eaten with a spork by cannibal senior citizens." She grumbled sarcastically, folding her arms under her chest. Hoagie gasped overdramatically, bouncing in his seat on the TND couch.

"I would so pay to see that!"

Once again she slapped him with her hat.

"You know for a hat that thing hurts…"

I like to live like I'm in a cartoon
Yes, I'm chasing you all around the room
I beat your, beat your brains out
That's how I flirt
It's a vicious little game but no one gets hurt
And it's a, hey, hey
Let's keep it together baby
Can we, hey, hey
Work it out?

"It's supposed to hurt darling, that's why Abby hits ya with it." Abby said waving the weapon around. When he flinched the corner of her mouth quirked up into a smirk. It was such a shame how afraid of her he was. You'd think he'd fight back now that he was sixteen, but no…this was Hoagie she was dealing with. Her smirk grew as she thought about how she liked it this way.

"You know this can be considered as abuse…maybe I should call one of those teen hotlines." He said with a nod as she hooked her hat back on her head for the second time.

"You never stop, do ya?"

Hoagie looked coy for a moment as his brow shot up. "Stop what?" He asked ever so sweetly. Abby quirked a brow at him as she leaned back into her seat.

"That joking thing ya do. You're like a cartoon…" She muttered moving her eyes away from him. She wouldn't have him any other way but there was a snow balls chance in hell that she would admit that.

"I guess I am…" he said thoughtfully with an amused smile. "I guess I'm the witty protagonist and you, my dear Abby are my significant other? My canon partnership, perhaps?"

Another groan passed her lips as she ducked her head, the brim of her hat hiding the light rose color that dusted her cheeks.

This loves a cartoon baby in Technicolor
Screw your head back on cuz here comes your mother
With her curlers made of dynamite
She's throwin them at us tonight
Cuz it's a pretty, pretty kitty, but the kitty still bites
Yes, it's a pretty, pretty kitty but the kitty still bites
(meow)

"In your dreams first of all," She began with a forced laugh. Hoagie's crooked smile did not falter. He seemed less than convinced. "And second of all Abby was thinking of more of the goof ball antagonist to a rather charming female lead."

"Oh no…" He said shaking his head frantically. "There is no way I'm going to be second best to a girl, especially in a cartoon!" He exclaimed. Abby's jaw dropped a bit as she gave him an incredulous look.

"What is this? The stone-age? Get your sexist head into the twentieth century babe. Cartoons are changing for the better with girls taking up the head with a wing man to back her up although a girl is always right."

"I have yet to see a cartoon with a female lead and trust me, I watch a lot of cartoons." Hoagie said smartly as a smirk came to his lips.

"Is that where you get your material from?" She droned flatly.

He avoided her eyes. "No…" He lied.

Abby brought a hand to her forehead, shaking her head sadly at her goggling wearing friend.

I like to live like I'm in a cartoon
Got a bowling ball on a table spoon
I'm striking, striking you out
Drop it on your head
Kill you a million different ways, but you're still not dead
And it's a, hey, hey
Let's keep it together
Can we, hey, hey
Work it out?

"Okay so I'll admit I am not as witty as I could be…" Hoagie began almost carefully. Abby snorted.

"Try not at all!" She corrected. He shot her a fleeting glare.

"Yea, but I still get to be the protagonist…oh! I could maybe be the goofy heroic type and you, my fine young maiden, are my damsel in distress who…as always, ends up being the love I've been looking for." He explained taking once of her hands in his and stroking the back of it tenderly.

"You are hardly the heroic type Hoags…" She chuckled taking her hand away.

"You really know how to deflate a guy's ego, don't cha?"

Abby smiled inwardly. "It's what Abby does baby; you should be used to it by now."

"Well at least give me this!" He whined childishly. "I have the whole thing planned out in my head."

"You do know that all the ideas going through your head right now are far from true." Abby said firmly. He pursed his lips.

"Even the part where you fall madly in love with me?" He questioned leaning in towards her. She swallowed as she scooted closer to the edge of the couch. He followed her. "Don't tell me you haven't yet…" He laughed.

This loves a cartoon baby in Technicolor
Screw your head back on cuz here comes your mother
With her curlers made of dynamite
She's throwin them at us tonight

This loves a cartoon baby and you're the hero
Pop your greens down, lover, then whack the weirdo
He's tryin to fly me to the moon
But I'm just stayin here with you
Yes, it's a pretty, pretty kitty but the kitty still bites
Yes it's a pretty, pretty kitty but the kitty still bites
Yes, it's a pretty, pretty kitty but the kitty still bites

"Abby hasn't yet." She said tonelessly.

"Liar." He accused, his smirk growing. She shot him a glare.

"What makes you think that Abby would ever agree to being the damsel in distress?" She snapped shifting the subject.

"Because it's a cartoon Abby, anything goes!" He explained in an a-matter-of-fact tone. Abby resisted the urge to roll her eyes as she slumped further into her seat.

"Abby can handle herself just fine…" She muttered smartly before sticking her tongue out childishly at him.

Hoagie nodded slowly. "I'm sure Abby can but…"

"This is all hypothetical!" She reminded him, cutting him off completely. He grinned widely at her.

"Exactly!" he said throwing his hands into the air.

Bound to the sound; get down, get down, down
Itty, bitty, nitty, gritty, polka-dotted, pretty kitty
Bound to the sound; get down, get down, down
Itty, bitty, nitty, gritty, polka-dotted, pretty kitty

I like to live like I'm in a cartoon
Yes, I'll suck you up into my vacuum
I'm a bumble, bumble bee, honey, and I need a mate
Oh, it's illegal where we live but we're outta state

"Hypothetically I am a cartoon character as you say and hypothetically I am the witty, heroic yet goofy protagonist and you, Abby, are the fine damsel in distress and the significant other to my character because it's a canon relationship, ya can't fight it babe." He said smoothly as he once again took one of her hands once again. This time her brought her hand to his lips, allowing them to brush over her knuckles before he glanced up at her, a wolfish smile on his lips.

Abby pressed her lips into a line as she shifted uncomfortably. "Okay…hypothetically speaking." She reminded him. He nodded as if to dismiss what she had said.

"And let's just say, hypothetically, this goofy character decided to arouse his shippers by kissing said significant other, meaning you." He questioned quirking a brow. Abby could feel that wretched blush creep up the back of her neck.

"Well, hypothetically," She mimicked rolling her eyes, but smiling nonetheless. "This significant other would hardly object to such a daring move…that is if this self-proclaimed hero actually had the guts to proceed." She said going along with his ideas.

Hoagie laughed lightly before pulling her into him by the hand and crashing his lips to hers. Abby was hardly surprised. She had challenged him and she had seen Hoagie do a lot of things, but one thing he never did was back down from a challenge.

This loves a cartoon baby in Technicolor
Screw your head back on cuz here comes your mother
With her curlers made of dynamite
She's throwin them at us tonight

This loves a cartoon baby and you're the hero
Pop your greens down, lover, then whack the weirdo
He's tryin to fly me to the moon
But I'm just stayin here with you
Yes, it's a pretty, pretty kitty but the kitty still bites
Yes it's a pretty, pretty kitty but the kitty still bites
Yes, it's a pretty, pretty kitty but the kitty still bites

It was a short, undemanding kiss; a sweet brush of the lips as the gently moved with one another. A simple kiss that would leave them both itching for more, but they pulled away nonetheless. An arrogant smirk tugged at Hoagie's lips while Abby bit into her bottom lip, her cheeks burning widely due to the new sensation burning in her chest

"That was all hypothetical." She finally spoke.

Hoagie snorted. "How can a kiss be hypothetical?" He questioned. Abby thought for a moment before shrugging, her calm, cool demeanor returning to her once again.

"It just was…" She breathed as she stood to her feet, making a bee line for the door.

"Where are you going?"

"My room…" She said as she stretched an arm over her head.

"Well let's say, hypothetically, I wanted t join you…what would you say?"

Abby smirked at him over her shoulder. "Do you have the guts to proceed?"

Hoagie did not go in for further argument. He jumped from the couch, and Abby smiled widely before running in the direction of her room, all the while laughing openly. He took off after her, that wolfish smile returning.

Na, na, na, na, na, na,
I got a microphone!
Na, na, na, na, na, na,
I got a microphone!

Naughty Hoagie and Abby…well I've been known for getting naughty then snapping back like a rubber band. I find it rather fun…Haha. So, I hope you all enjoyed this first chapter. There will be more songfics to come…eh but not all at once. You gotta give birth to these kinds of things. Anyways, please review and tell me what ya think. Hopefully it wasn't too bad.

~DR~