A/N: Still don't own these characters. Don't let the shock overwhelm you.

Chapter 18 Piggies

What was the point, my head dropped. I couldn't fight for us, couldn't fight for him, not if he didn't want me. I stared at my feet cursing the damn sandal that started this. I looked at my toes and saw red. The lava bubbled to the surface. The steel in my backbone snapped into place, my head popped up.

"Do you think I'm new? Do you really think you can spew a bunch of bullshit and I will just accept your word as the fucking gospel of Nate." He turned on the stairs, "Yeah, I said Nate. You fucking love being Nate, from the minute you get up and start cleaning house, to going to your job which you love so much you hang with your clients after work. You have them on schedule so don't tell me you don't enjoy it. My god man, if we don't have money it's because you spend it on their medicine. You love it, all of it and you know what else?" I screamed, "You fucking love me too! From the top of my head to tips of my toes. You fucking adore me."

I stuck my fingers in my hair and held it out, "You brushed the burrs out of this last night like every night we run patrols so it could grow this long. You did it, I didn't ask! You did it." I stuck my foot out, "Take a good look at the tips Nate," I spat his name. "It matches the fleck in your hair, you didn't pull it back again this morning, when you painted my precious little piggies. " His words, never mine, his chore mine not mine. Nail polish can't survive the phase so its pointless to paint them in my opinion, but not in his. "You painted my toe nails this morning, you actually painted my toe nails, while I was asleep and you want to convince me that you don't love me! BULL - Fucking - SHIT."

He stood there watching me, his face no longer hard just sad. The droop of his shoulders, the angle of his neck, his hair framing his downturned face, it all hurt. "Now you accept it...finally." He fell silent then said, "Leah, please." The sadness of his stance was a physical pain that ran from the top the aforementioned head to the tips of the aforementioned toes. This, whatever he was doing, was tearing him apart. This couldn't be happening.

"It doesn't matter though, does it? You're leaving me. The man who said "You will never face anything alone again" is leaving me. You love me but you're leaving me, without even the dignity of the truth. And I'll be here stuck waiting for you because I'm imprinted and I can't opt out if I get tired of the weather."

Nate flew at me faster than my eye could track. His fist pounded the wall behind my head before my eyes could adjust to his face, contorted in rage just inches from my own. "Don't you ever say that! Do not imply because you have a special word for it, that your feelings for me are stronger than mine for you." He pounded the wall again punctuating his point, his breath warm in my face. His anger was real, honest and raw. My fear was non-existent, I am what I am, conflict, danger the fight, I thrive on it both of us do the wolf and Leah. We rather confront honest aggression over deception any day. The agitation that crawled on my skin faded as the lies ended. I couldn't even file the unfamiliar sensation away under this is what it feels like when my imprint lies because the heat of his anger was nothing compared to the swell of unsuppressed heartache coming through the connection.

"I love you so much that I told the Volturi about my father and sisters and did not even warn them. I was so caught up in you, wanting to protect you. I left them uninformed and defenseless. Father is dead and my sisters are unprotected." The last vestige of anger seeped from his body, his forehead touched mine, the pain increased. "Beautiful, beautiful Leah, I must go to them. I must."

I wrapped my arms around him, lightly, then tightened, pulling him in closer, anchoring his body to mine, "I am coming with you."

"I knew you would say that, if you knew." He sighed, laying his head on my shoulder taking comfort from me. This was how it should be. The constriction in my chest eased.

"Then you knew correctly. Of course I'm coming with you. You are my life. We can leave tonight." I didn't know where we were going but I was ready.

"My sisters have had their world shattered. For centuries they lived in anonymity and I revealed them to the Volturi. I am directly responsible for Father's death."

"You're going to be in danger and you think I'm going to let you face that alone? No way." I was beginning to get agitated again but I didn't let him go, if anything I held tighter.

"I can handle my sisters, they need me right now. Recall how you felt about Bella, when you blamed her for your father's death. Remember how you felt while her life seemed to go on getting better and your life was collateral damage."

"Yeah, so what?" I asked.

"Beautiful, you would be their Bella. They need me but you would be the scapegoat. You would be the reason I was not there when they needed me most."

"Surely they wouldn't be that unreasonable." I grasped. "I didn't have anything to do with Joham's death."

"Beautiful, you're hurting me." Nate tugged for freedom and I eased up, but only a little. "You tell me? Were you that unreasonable?"

I thought back to my fixation of Carlisle saving my father but for Bella. I thought about our theory that the vampire presence caused the rampant phasing. I thought about losing Sam, losing Emily, virtually losing my ovaries and any chance of having children. My hate for her wasn't completely rational but I hated her for a long time. "I can handle myself."

"You can, and my sisters are not warriors but they are three, hurt and angry half vampires. They are dangerous, I will not risk you and I will not risk them. You will always be my priority, any conflict, physical or otherwise... I know what my choice would be."

I nodded, unable to say anything. I would go to any length for Seth, but if it came down to a contest, if there was a fight between Nate and Seth, that I couldn't stop, I knew where my ultimate loyalty was and I never wanted to be in that position and I couldn't put him in it. I was going to have to let him go.

We stood there wrapped in each other holding on to what was most precious in this world, aching. Tears rolled down my face and I snorted with a mirthless laugh. "We finally say 'I love you' and it ends with you leaving."

"I love you and when I return and I will return, will you finally do me the honor of becoming my wife?"

"Yes. Yes of course." I laughed again at the sheer twisted way this "proper" proposal was coming about. "I love you and would be honored to be your wife."

We stood there wrapped in each other for a few moments afraid of what was to come. "You really do love me?" I asked.

"Are you fishing? I did just say it." He rested his head against mine.

"I want to hear it again. I won't tire of hearing it." My fingers delved into his hair, touching his scalp. I wanted to touch him everywhere.

"Do you know the last time I was with a woman?" Nate asked what under the circumstances was the last question I could have expected. Standing pelvis to pelvis, touching from chest to knee, I definitely wanted to talk about the women in his past. Not. However this wasn't our first day together so I was surprised but certainly not shocked at the turn of conversation.

"Gee, I don't know. Tell me. I can't wait to know," I deadpanned. In the recesses of my mind I knew this was what he meant when he said I didn't want to know Nahuel. I actively avoided asking him about anything that would make me think of the people who had died at his hands or really his teeth to be technical about it.

He sensed my discomfort and eased back to look into my eyes. "It was before you were born and more importantly, I believe wholeheartedly, it was because you were born. I, through no direct action or thought, lost interest in that side of life. It was mere days before your birth that I last had that urge for sexual release. You drew breath into your lungs and a world away, I began to wait for I knew not what. You were made for me."

"That means you have always been mine, not the other way around." I laughed at his shocked expression then softened, "It means NaLeah is real" I placed my hand over his heart. "We are together here, and always will be no matter where we are. We love each other. "

Our kiss was sweeter than any we had ever shared. His lips were gentle and mine were patient as we explored the emotions sweeping over us. We entwined our hands, pressed between our bodies, holding hands between our hearts. Curves were not caressed and groins did not grind. One sweet kiss flowed into another tender caress of the lips pressing lightly, exploring gently, expressing wonder and joy at being together until Nate sighed and said, "I wish to make love to you."

"Mmm," was my only reply. He carried me up the stairs and I allowed it, not wanting to break contact for any reason.

Our lovemaking was unlike anything in my realm of experience. It amazed me that embracing the love we shared could intensify the act. Our focus, so keen on the expressing the intense emotion flowing between us that the physical seemed to happen of its own volition, we needed to be closer, as close as a man and woman could be therefore we were. Our bodies joined in the background of our mind and heart finally being on one accord. This, I realized in the aftermath, was love. We had made love and I couldn't recall what had happened but I was satisfied mentally, physically and emotionally. I slipped into sleep at peace with the world.