A/N: Hey guys, sorry for my shitty uploading pattern and such, I'm still working on the story I just have been wicked busy ); This chapter has yet to be corrected for spelling and grammer by my BETA (who is on vacation untill next monday) BUT I did my best to read over it. I swear Phoenix is going to be in the story soon and maybe Edgey will get alittle less... edgy...

also, reviews and comments keep me willing to write : D *hint hint*

EDIT: Here be the BETA'ed version :D

A grin flashed across my face as the verdict was read. Guilty. It was always a nice word to hear, another villain sentenced, another war won. My opponent had been that overzealous defense attorney again. She bit her lip and knotted her eyebrows when the judge announced the verdict. It was good to win. I sorted my things and prepared to leave. A glance toward the defense showed Lynn comforting her client. I had no remorse; he was most certainly guilty. I walked toward the door, head held high. I was slowly getting through Derek leaving and Phoenix's outburst, but they still lingered on the outskirts of thought, waiting to be delved into.

I made my way to my car and drove. I pulled into the driveway and sat in my car for a moment, finishing my cigarette and thinking. I didn't know what to do about Phoenix. Should I call him, should I ignore it, should I pretend it never happened? I was horrible when it came to talking or showing feelings… And it showed.

I sat in silence for another moment and contemplated lighting another cigarette. I decided against it and made my way inside. I set my briefcase on my desk and sat in a chair, then surveyed the room; Pesu was sleeping on the couch, and the clock was steadily ticking along with the seconds. I relaxed my shoulders and turned to the desk. My mind was set on not doing paperwork, I was tired and just wanted to relax, but duty called. I flipped open my briefcase and took out a few files. I begin sifting through the papers and filling out the appropriate sections. I was soon lost in the world of law and order.

By the time I was caught up with all of my paperwork, it was five thirty. Pess had been sitting by my feet for the past hour and begging for attention. I gently ruffled the fur on the back of her neck and stood. She repeated my actions and looked up and me. I felt myself grin and I kneeled to her level. She instantly was on her back wanting her stomach scratched. I obliged and was rewarded with much tail wagging and face licking.

I sat on the floor with her for another hour; I enjoyed the company. Talking to her was the best I could do. People where just so… awkward. My mind wandered to things I would rather keep under wraps. An image of Phoenix popped into my mind. His face was the same as the last time I saw him. It was hurt and distant, like he was pondering something. I lightly bit my lip. I felt like scum. His words raced through my mind again. I didn't know what to do about it—I just couldn't dispose of these unnecessary feelings.

I gave Pess one last pat on the stomach and got up. I felt light headed and needed a cigarette. What a horrible feeling, needing something just to clear your head. I scoffed at my dependence and took a seat in the kitchen. I brought the lighter to the end of my cigarette and inhaled. I closed my eyes and tried to clear my head. The images and thoughts slowly eased away, and I released my held breath.

My shoulders slumped, and I held my head in my hands. What was I doing? But more importantly, why? I was destroying myself up over him, because he made me feel. Feel what? Human, alive, sane, alive. Just feel.

Sure, I had felt before him, but it wasn't the same. I crushed the smoldering cigarette into the ashtray on the table and got up. I promptly sat back down. What the hell was I supposed to do?