Penname: BellaFlan
Title of story: Swan Dive
Main Character(s): Bella Swan and Jacob Black
Non-Canon Pairing, New Moon AU
"The Rain Scene" Challenge
http://www(.)fanfiction(.)net/~teamsob

Beta: Charlotte Webber

Disclaimer: Please note I have used Canadian spelling. I own nothing. Stephenie Meyer owns everything. I'd like to borrow Jacob on weekends though, if she'd let me.

Ice clung to my hair in shards. Take one more little step and it will be over. The tempest brewing about seventy feet down should have had me terror stricken, however nothing frightened me more than the prospect of living. I couldn't face another day of this bleak existence without him. I kicked at a piece of rock and watched it tumble and disappear into the fog below. Pathetic fallacy, I scoffed to myself as the storm raged beneath me, above me and through me. Rain and wind; I hated the cold and the wet but I had suffered much worse. Every breath I took felt like tiny pieces of glass were piercing through my lungs.

This wasn't like me at all, though. I felt like a zombie I was so devoid of emotion. Sure, I was still aware of the crippling depression however the sweet oblivion that lay beyond the edge of the cliff left me with hope of some kind of solace, at least.

So much for Romeo and Juliet. I wasn't Juliet after all. I was more like Ophelia, going mad and drowning. Would I drown? I hoped that I would die before hitting the water.

"Edward." I allowed the name that could not be spoken to pass through my lips like sweet blasphemy. "You wanted me to be human. There is nothing more human than death."

I inched my feet forward, wiggling my toes against the frozen rock. Would I have the guts to take another step? Would I even need to? My own clumsiness could lend a hand in my demise. An accident would be so much easier for Charlie to come to turns with. Charlie. I'm so sorry, Daddy. I closed my eyes and tried to give myself over to vertigo, but when the first dizzy wave hit me, I gasped in wretched fear and righted my footing. I kicked up rubble and stone in my struggles, and watched it fall gracelessly down the rock wall with morbid curiosity.

I couldn't do it.

Backing away slightly, I lowered to a crouch so that I could still watch the water slice into the cliff. The rock face was well weathered from corrosion.

"Bella?" A familiar voice tore through the fog.

"Go away," I muttered. Violent tremors wracked through my body as my senses returned. I resurfaced from my breakdown feeling utterly cold and ridiculous. "Jacob?"

"What are you doing?" His voice was angry.

"Tilting at windmills," I said bitterly. I heard him step closer but squeezed my eyes shut petulantly. First Shakespeare and now Don Quixote. I had really gone over the deep end.

"Come away from the ledge, Bella. I don't want to have to jump in after you."

"No one said you had to." The cold rain had finally frozen my heart. "I don't love you, Jacob Black. I'll never love you so you might as well leave me alone. Go find a nice Quileute girl to imprint upon. Hell, if you needed proof that we're not meant to be, there's your proof. I am not the sun to your blind eyes. I'm just a pathetic scorned girl."

"Pathetic? Yeah, I agree." His voice sounded more hurt than angry now but he put on a show of manly rage. "Get your ass away from that cliff, Isabella Marie Swan. So help me, I'll tell Charlie that you've gone loony-toons once and for all."

My eyes were still squeezed shut when I felt his hot hands form manacles on my upper-arms, dragging me roughly away from the ledge. "Go to hell!" I screamed and thrashed against him. Blindly, I punched and swatted at his bare torso but I was offering no more of an offense than a gnat to a lion. My assault might have actually tickled him because he was laughing.

My eyes flew open and I roared, "Fuck you!" My arm drew back to punch him but he caught my fist easily when it snapped forward.

"I don't want you to break your hand on my rock-hard face." He offered me a weak smile. The hateful glare I expected to be met with was not at all what I saw. His eyes were full of concern and... something I could not name. Like he was distracted or fighting against a strong emotion. Not for the first time, I shamefully reminded myself that I didn't deserve him.

The rain continued to pelt down on us but the harsh elements seemed to have no effect on Jacob. His newly shorn black hair framed the copper perfection of his face, making his prominent cheekbones and strong jaw even more defined. I gasped in an unsteady breath at the sight of his clenched muscles as they rolled under his glistening skin, wet with rain. "Bella," he implored, drawing my attention to his puffy lips. Did he always have such a perfect cupid's bow? I feasted upon him with hungry eyes, inch by glorious inch as if I'd never seen him before. He was still gripping my arms but I no longer fought against the restraint. I unclenched my fist and he loosened his hold. His huge hand dropped to encircle my wrist as I pressed my palm flush against his chest. I felt a shock of gratifying heat pass threw my skin, immediately soothing the chill. Oh god, I couldn't help myself. With my other hand, I traced the lines of his sculpted abdominal muscles and stopped my explorations just below his navel, where hair began to sprout. He shuddered beneath my touch. There was a concave dip near his hip bone that I wanted to caress so badly but I knew that was a boundary I shouldn't dare cross. I bit my lip and drew my gaze to his face, where I was met with wide and astonished black eyes.

"I didn't mean it," I choked through my dry throat. "I- I could never hate you. I just hate feeling this way."

He nodded and pulled me into an embrace that would surely melt the ice that still clung to me. I closed my eyes and inhaled his strong musk, feeling light-headed. Something strange was happening to my body. I was weak and shaky from emotional exhaustion and the cold, but I'm not sure if that explained the swoon.

I pulled myself out of his embrace, utterly confounded by the brewing turmoil of conflicting emotions and, if I was being honest with myself, lust that had overtaken me. Jacob must of mistook my heavy breathing for rage. Instantly he was incensed.

"That was selfish and terrible, Bella. How could you even toy with the idea of killing yourself? What got into you?" He grabbed my arms in another restraint and my fragile hold over my emotions was shattered.

Weakly, I struggled against him again. "How dare you? Do you have any of idea how much pain I'm in?"

He laughed without humour. "No, how could I? Why would I have an idea what it feels like to be desperately in love with someone who will never love me back."

I shook my head. "You don't love me, Jake."

"Fuck you!" he snarled, the curse transforming into a fearsome roar as he phased. He pulled back instantly from me with his head low to the ground and his muzzle puckering in a growl.

"I'm sorry," I whispered. What right did I have to tell him how he felt? "Don't leave me, Jake. Please? I have no right to ask for your help after acting so terribly but I... You're the only one I... I need you."

The giant red wolf padded back towards me and made three circles before heaving his body to the ground a few feet away. I lowered myself against his fur and pulled his paw about me like a blanket.

"I'm so cold," I whispered and passed out.

--

"Bella! Bella!"

"Shh," I mumbled. "Sleeping."

"Please wake-up, sweetheart."

My body was being jostled. I noticed Jacob was no longer a wolf and also, he was carrying me.

"What's going on?" I was so cold I could barely speak.

"Don't go to sleep, Bella. Stay with me!"

"'Kay." My eyelids were so heavy though. I looked down as my head lolled to the side and observed Jacob didn't have shoes on... Also, his calves were bare. I tore my gaze up to his thighs and stopped. The muscle there was so thick, I had never really noticed before. The raw power his body was capable of, even in human form, was staggering.

"Are you wearing clothes?"

"Nope," he said simply.

"Hm."

"Feel free to check out the goods if it will help keep you awake, but please note that it's really very cold out before you make any comparisons."

My brow furrowed in confusion. "I have nothing to compare."

"What about your leech?"

"He- We never did anything like that."

"Oh." I could see Billy's house now. "Almost there, honey."

"Jacob?"

"Yeah, Bella?"

"I like it when you're naked. You should never wear clothes."

I passed out completely.

--

Jacob peeled a warm afghan away from my bare skin and pushed a hot water bottle into my arms. I was lying in his bed and he spooned against my back.

"Where are my clothes?" I muttered in confusion.

"Dryer," he said huskily and kissed my shoulder through the blanket. "I had to get the wet clothes off of you, Bells. I swear, I tried not to look."

"I don't believe you."

"That's because I'm lying," he sighed with a chuckle. "You're so fucking beautiful it hurts, Bells."

"Tit for tat, I suppose."

"Hah! I knew you were looking at my tat!"

A warm ripple of pleasure settled in my stomach as his breath quickened against the back of my neck. "Was not!"

"Are you still cold?" He was changing the subject. Good for him.

"Mm, I'm warming up." I snuggled into the crook of his arm. "Jacob?"

"Yeah?"

"I'm sorry for...everything."

"I know, Bells. S'okay."

I pushed my body back further so that every inch of me was lined up with him. I could feel his bare skin everywhere, however I was both grateful and disappointed to discover that he was now wearing shorts. What was wrong with me?

"What are you thinking about?" I ventured.

"Can't tell you." He tightened his hold on me and I nuzzled my cheek into his bicep.

"Why not?"

He sighed, "Mm, you feel so good in my arms, Bella. I didn't know I could..." He stopped speaking and planted a soft kiss in my hair. "Mm, so sweet."

I shuddered. One of his hands lowered to my thigh and my nipples stood erect in response. What was happening to me? "Why can't you tell me?" My voice was nearly a moan. I rolled onto my back exposing one of my breasts. His eyes widened, but he pulled the blanket to cover me.

"I don't want to freak you out. It's been an emotional day as it is. Go back to sleep, baby."

I flipped over to face him and he tucked the blankets around me, before pulling me back against him. I shook my head. "Too cold. I need skin to skin." I peeled the blanket away from me and pressed my breasts into his chest.

"What are you playing at?" His voice was agitated, his body seemingly full of tension all of the sudden.

"I need to feel you against me," I muttered and wrapped my arms around his lower back. He offered no argument and pulled my leg between his thighs, groaning. I stiffened in response, becoming aware of his huge erection. My eyes met his and they appeared half crazed.

"I'm only human," he explained and pulled back the blanket to look at me. "Oh, fuck, Bella. I need you so much."

I jerked away from him. "Stop!"

He let go of me, recoiling like I had burned him and looked at me with stunned, hurt eyes. "I'll get you another water bottle," he spat coldly. "Despite what you think, I'm more than just your bed warmer." I watched him disappear through the door and started crying. I didn't mean to pull away from him, I was just startled. Something strange was happening here. When I woke up this morning, I was so certain about how I felt. I was fucking miserable and suicidal. Now, I felt inexplicably drawn to my best friend in a way that shouldn't be possible when my heart was broken and bloodied.

I was in love with Edward, not Jacob. Wasn't I? Wait... How was I able to think his name suddenly without coming undone? "Edward," I whispered tentatively.

Nothing. No crippling heartache.

I sat up in the bed and marvelled at the absence of pain. It felt so strange. I had spent the last six months wearing my misery like a comfortable pair of jeans and suddenly, I felt naked.

Was it catharsis? The shock of nearly doing myself in cured me of my depression? I shivered as I pictured myself back on the icy cliff. Distinctly, I remembered feeling so forlorn that death seemed like the only refuge.

But then Jacob showed up and saved me... again. I shivered once more at the memory of his half-naked, wet body shimmering in the moonlight. He was glowing in a way that was preternatural.

No pain. It was glorious to be free, but there was something else... I was drowning in an emotion I could not name.

Jacob kicked the door open roughly with his foot and shoved another hot water bottle into my arm. I grappled for his wrist. "What happened on the cliff?" I demanded, clinging to his arm.

"You push me away and pull me in at the same time. I want to be angry with you but I can't seem to manage it." He sighed in defeat and sat on the edge of his bed. He didn't push me away like I had anticipated so I crawled into his lap. He covered me with the blanket and repeated, "I don't want to freak you out."

"Yeah, you said that already. Go on," I urged. "My reaction may surprise you."

He shook his head. "You're not going to believe me."

"Try me," I pressed, fairly certain I knew what he was going to say.

"I, uh, imprinted on you," he mumbled as if embarrassed. "I'm not sure why it didn't happen before and I swear this isn't a lie."

"Why do you think I wouldn't believe you?" I pressed my cheek into his chest.

"Well, it sounds strange. Honestly, Bells, I was already so in love with you that the difference was subtle."

I looked up at his face and he appeared almost frightened. "It happened just after you pulled me away from the ledge," I confirmed with a tremble.

"Yeah." There was a tremble in his voice too. "Like I said, I was already in love with you so, um, no change there. It's just... I don't know, suddenly I felt like I would come apart if I couldn't touch you. It's driving me mad that I can't kiss you right now."

"You want to kiss me?" I wrapped my arms around his neck and drew my lips to his collar bone, planting a chaste kiss.

"You have no idea," he groaned.

"Try me."

"Bella," he whispered. Before I could respond, he cupped my head in his hands and pressed his lips against mine. I moulded my mouth to the shape of his, however he parted his lips and pulled my upper lip into a suck. I groaned and instinct took over. I drew my tongue across his lower lip, relishing in the taste of his mouth. I needed more. His tongue met mine and I moaned into his mouth. Suddenly we were kissing with a voracious need to possess each other completely. It was primal and base and, oh, so glorious.

"I love you, Jacob," I managed between kisses.

"Did you- What did you say?" He looked stunned.

I dropped that stupid blanket off of my body and pulled him down on top of me. "I'm in love with you," I repeated and kissed him, once, twice and again. "I need you."

"You have me," he vowed, kissing the side of my mouth, my cheek, my chin, my neck, my shoulder.

"I want you," I repeated, not knowing how else to communicate my desire. "I want every part of you."

"You have me, Bella. I'll spend the rest of my life loving you." He trailed soft kisses down the side of my breast and cupped the other one in his hand. My back arched in response, and he moaned at my reaction. He took one nipple between his thumb and forefinger, rolling and pinching it softly. The other nipple was licked and kissed.

"Jacob," I cried out. "I need-" ...But I couldn't finish the sentence. I was so conditioned to keep my desire secret for my own protection.

"What do you need, baby? I'll give you anything you want."

I shook my head, feeling my cheeks reddening. How could I tell him what I wanted? What I'd give to be able to just transfer my thoughts directly into his mind and spare myself the humiliation of speech.

"It's okay, Bella. If things are happening too fast, I won't push you. We have the rest of our lives to-"

"Too slow," I choked out and shook my head vigorously.

His eyes narrowed in confusion. "Too slow?"

I nodded. It felt like we were playing charades.

"Wait, are you trying to tell me that I'm not moving fast enough?"

"Not exactly." I wrapped my legs around his hips and dug my heels into his bum. "I want you," I repeated and bucked my hips upwards into his erection. "All of you...every which way."

"Fuck," he moaned.

"Yes! That's what I want," I said excitedly and then watched in dismay as Jacob's face broke out into a wide, silly grin. I tried to hide my face but he held it with his hands so that I was forced to meet his probing eyes. "Say it."

"No." I couldn't!

"Say it and I'll do it," he taunted and attacked my neck with his tongue. A hot wave of lust shot through my body and stirred between my legs.

"Fuck me," I whispered.

"Oh, Bella. This started off as the worst day of my life and suddenly, it's Christmas!"

Author's Note: This is my first challenge attempt. After the contest is over, I plan to expand the lemon and provide a Jacob POV if there is enough interest. Review me, pretty please with SOB Jacob on top! Thank you to Charlotte Webber and wordslinger for your advice and encouragement.