Title: Still Love You the Same

Author: Sorasgirl333

Summary: Time is going by so much faster than I and I'm starting to regret not spending all of it with you- now I'm wondering why I've kept this bottled inside…

Disclaimer: Kingdom Hearts not mine, Nickelbacks song "Never Gonna Be Alone" isn't mine nor is "Call Me" by Shinedown or "Life After You" by Daughtry. Idea is mainly mine- it was inspired by the "Never Gonna Be Alone" music video. Limited usage of lyrics are credited to the bands.

Authors Note: This was one of those needs for inspiration with a sudden slap to the face of ideas lol. Took a while to get something out of me that seemed worth while. Yay for a double shot! Thanks Nickelback!

x.o.x.o.x.o.x

You're invited to a very special day.

A day to join two people as one.

A true ceremony of love.

x.o.x.o.x.o.x

"Sora, please quiet down for a moment." My teacher, Miss Kramer, had just told me. I hurried and sat down in my seat near the front row of the classroom. Riku, who was sitting diagonally across from me, threw a paper ball at my head. I turned around and glared. "Riku! Please!" Miss Kramer cleared her throat to keep her composure. "Class, please welcome Kairi to our third grade classroom."

We stared at the door to see this short little girl come into class. She was wearing some white dress and a pink bag on her back that was way too big for her. Kairi looked kind of scared to be in front of all of us. Some of the other kids said their hellos but none of us really seemed to care too much about having someone new. Kairi walked over to the empty seat near mine and sat down. She kept her head low and didn't make any eye contact the rest of class.

During recess, Kairi sat against the wall by herself looking at everyone else playing. Riku and I were by the swings looking at her. "Go talk to her." Riku said shoving me.

I glared at him, "no, you!"

"Okay, let's go." Riku began to walk toward her and I hurried to catch up. I didn't think he actually meant it. As soon as we got closer, she looked up at us with a shocked face. "Kairi, right?" Riku asked.

"Y-yeah." She replied quietly.

"I'm Riku, and this is Sora." He patted me on the back lightly. I smiled at her and she slowly smiled back at us.

It didn't take long for her to get used to us. We all hung out at recess and ate our lunches together. Riku had a habit of pulling her hair and blaming me which caused her to scream at me quite often. That was the one part I never missed about elementary school.

After some time together and becoming better friends, Kairi and I spent more time together. "Sora, let's play house." She smiled at me. I stared at her wondering what in the world made her think I would want to play a girl game with a girl. She handed over her doll, "you can be the daddy."

"Are you the mommy?" I asked staring at the doll in disbelief.

"Of course I am!" She grinned.

"Well, aren't mommy's and daddy's supposed to get married or something?"

Kairi looked around before looking back at me. "Let's get married Sora. You know it's going to happen sooner or later." I felt my eyes widen which caused her to laugh. "Come on, Riku is waiting for us."

x.o.x.o.x

Middle school was a slightly different story…

Being fourteen in the eight grade and starting to realize the opposite sex as something other than a cootie covered kid made me see Kairi in a whole new light. Riku, Kairi, and I were spending time together nearly every waking moment.

"Can we go to the mall?" Kairi fluttered her eyes sweetly at Riku, who at this point was old enough to have his permit yet not drive without supervision- but did it anyway. Kairi and I had to rely on him for our travels since we actually trusted him with our lives in a car. Riku stared at her raising an eyebrow. She smiled innocently at him. I stared at Kairi in awe. I never realized how beautiful she was… Her auburn hair was so soft and shiny, her amethyst-colored eyes lit up when she smiled, her skin looked like it was constantly glowing, and she had a body that looked like it belonged to a seventeen-year-old. I suddenly felt hot.

"Why do you want to go the mall?" Riku asked once we stepped out of the bus.

Kairi walked over to Riku's black sports car that his parents had bought him and she ran her finger tips along the hood. "Oh, you know… to go shopping."

"More like hunt out boys or something." Our older, silver-haired friend said casually as he opened the backseat door to toss his books inside. I leaned against the car to see what Kairi had to say.

"I was actually thinking about going to pick out swimsuits for the summer." I saw her face turn red and I definitely felt mine turn red as well. I quickly looked away but I felt Riku staring at me. I saw him smirking at me from the corner of my eye.

"Okay, let's go then." Riku got into the drivers seat and Kairi walked over to the passenger side while I opened the back door. She smiled at me and bit her lip softly before climbing in. I don't know what this girl was doing to me but I was pretty sure she was doing it on purpose.

Upon arriving at the mall, we walked into a swimwear store… at least Kairi and I did; Riku disappeared to go talk to some girls who waved at him. "Thank you for coming with me, Sora." Kairi said skimming through racks of two piece swimsuits.

I looked around to see if I could keep my mind off Kairi in a bikini. "Anytime, Kai."

"Once I pick some out, I want you to help me decide on what to buy, okay?"

"All right." I nodded feeling good that she wanted me to help pick out her swimsuit. It wasn't long until she grabbed about five pairs. "Okay, well I like this one." I said pointing to a pink one with black polka-dots.

"No, wait." Kairi said shaking her head. "I need to try them on. You need to help me pick out which one looks better on."

My jaw dropped internally. I tried not to look too obvious at how shocked I was. "Wait, what did you say?" I asked just to make sure I heard her right. I looked around to see quite a few guys and some other girls in the store.

"Come on!" She pulled on my hand and drug me over to the fitting room.

I grabbed onto her hand and pulled her just a few inches away from me. "Wait." I realized how close we were and suddenly how badly I was falling for her. "Isn't this the kind of thing that people in relationships do?" I know it's one of those things that the guy is supposed to let happen but for some reason, I just felt protective and I didn't want anyone else seeing her nearly exposed.

Kairi brushed her hand against my cheek. "We're best friends. You're eventually going to see me in one of these with summer coming up." She had a point and by then there would be so many guys and I wouldn't be able to do anything about it. "And besides… we're getting married someday, remember? You'll eventually see me with less on." A smirk appeared on her face as she disappeared behind a fitting room door.

I thought I was going to pass out…

x.o.x.o.x

Freshman year was calling out to us. Kairi and I spent more one on one time together. We spent most of our last summer days out on the beach in the evenings when people would start to pack up and head back home.

"Sora, what do you think is going to happen after high school?" Kairi asked leaning back onto the towel she brought with her. I looked back at her, who wore the blue with silver stripped bikini that I had picked out for her, then back at the setting sun. It was quiet except for the steady waves crashing against the sand and pulling back what it could grab.

I pondered her question before replying, "More than likely a lot that we aren't going to expect."

She sighed behind me. "Are you scared?"

"Kind of." I leaned back and stared at the full moon that shined above us. "Are you?"

"Kind of." Kairi leaned into me a bit. "Sora?"

"Hum?"

"Thank you for being a friend." She replied. I flinched a bit at those words. I was more than positive that I really liked this girl and to think that she only thought of me being her friend stung.

"You're welcome Kairi." I sat back up and traced my fingers in the sand.

Kairi leaned forward to sit with me. "I meant thank you for being my first real friend. It meant a lot that you and Riku didn't pick on me when we all first met." She leaned forward a bit more to smile at me. I looked out of the corner of my eye and smirked back at her.

"Even though we were nice to you, we still thought you were infested with cooties." I replied.

Her mouth formed a perfect 'O' as she gasped and lightly hit my arm. "Like I didn't think that of you two." We both laughed. "I'm really glad we're still so close."

"Me too, Kai." I looked back at the ocean with a sigh.

"You remember our promise, right?" I heard her say.

I was slightly confused. We had made a lot of promises, like to stay friends forever, to always have secrets that only were shared between the two of us, to let each other know every important detail of our lives first before sharing them with anyone else- there were a lot of promises to pick from. "Which one?" I turned to look at her only to see her face just inches away from mine.

Her eyes closed instantly and before I realized it, her lips were on mine. Our first kiss was with each other. It was short and simple but it was a great first. She broke away slowly and smiled. "We're meant to be- we're going to get married."

I smiled at her as I placed my forehead against hers. That wasn't the last time we kissed.

x.o.x.o.x

"Only a month left until we graduate from high school and become adults." Riku said looking at the last pile of homework we just received.

"Thank goodness!" Kairi sighed as we all sat down at a table after school. I leaned over and wrapped my arm over Kairi's shoulders. She looked up at me and smiled.

"It's kind of sad though, don't you think?" I asked looking around the campus.

Riku sighed. "Don't tell me you're going to get all sappy on us here."

I shook my head with a small smile. "Nah, I'm just saying that things are going to be so different after high school."

"Aren't they supposed to be?" Riku asked.

"No, I get what he's saying." Kairi spoke up. We both looked at her. "He means that after high school we have this expectation for life to be set out for us just like it always has been in school. It's what we know and so the thought of not having a set path like we've always had is kind of scary. We don't know what's going to happen after we graduate. We know we all want to go to college and have our high school lives carry on like nothing happened but we all know deep down that things are going to change." Her warm blue eyes looked at me as she grasped onto my hand. "Is that what you meant?"

"Yeah, it is." I smiled kissing her on the forehead.

"So, when are you two getting married?" Namine, Kairi's best friend, joined us at the table with our other friend, Roxas.

Kairi smiled, "after we graduate from college."

We had been together since the summer before freshman year. Everything had been planned out for our wedding as the years went by with Kairi's constant prediction of our wedding day. The color theme was going to be dark blue, my favorite color, and purple being hers. Riku would be my Best Man, Roxas, Tidus, and Wakka would be the groomsmen. Kairi picked Namine to be her Maid of Honor with Selphie and Xion as her bridesmaids. She said she planned to pick out her third bridesmaid out in college.

We planned to go to the local University when college became an issue. We all applied to it and applied to other colleges of choice as a 'just in case'. Fate apparently had other plans though. I was going in for a business degree and Riku decided to go for a sports major; we got into the college we planned to attend. Kairi, an aspiring nurse, received a fully paid scholarship to a University seven hours away… by plane. She was leaving in a month to get settled in and a find a job.

Our graduation of 2006 was perfect. The weather was ideal- sunny and warm. The day that Kairi left for the airport, two weeks later, was the opposite- rainy and cold… almost as if the world suddenly stopped and felt what we felt. Kairi couldn't stop crying and I nearly broke down, too. I knew that it would only be temporary and that's where I kept my strength and motivation.

It was a lot harder than I thought. The first couple months, we called everyday, sometimes twice. After that, the calls weren't as often as they started, which was due to school. Slowly, things started to change and we grew apart. I always told her that I loved her and that it would never change. She agreed and I could tell in her voice that she meant it. Even though it was apparent to everyone that our love would never fade, we knew what was coming regardless.

o.x.o.x.o

"Hey baby," I said into her voicemail as I drove to the beach where we had made it official. "It's been a couple days since I heard from you. Just checking up to make sure you're alright and that school is going well. I finally got some down time, so I'm heading to our spot. I miss and I love you, Kairi." I sighed as I hung up the phone. I pulled into the parking lot and sat in the car to admire the scenery.

The phone started to ring. I looked at it for a second to realize that Kairi was waiting for me to answer. Things had changed so much and I wasn't sure what to make of our situation anymore- it was hurting me.

"Hey, Kai." I said as I finally answered.

"Hey," she sounded as if she was nearly out of breath. "Sorry I missed your call. I'm trying to hurry and get ready to hang out with some of my friends. We're having a girl's night out."

"Oh." I replied quietly. "Sounds fun."

"How are you?"

"I'm doing alright. Just tired but glad that I finally got a day off from work and school to just visit the beach." It was nearing the end of the first year of college already and with finals right around the corner, everything seemed to weigh me down.

"I miss the beach." Kairi said. "I miss you too."

"I miss you, Kai." I looked at the sky as I leaned against the steering wheel. We stayed silent for quite a while as I heard her continue to get ready through the line. It used to be non stop talking, there was always something to say, but now I wasn't sure if we really knew the other one anymore. I turned up the volume as I heard "Life After You" by Daughtry playing.

"What's happened to us?" Kairi nearly whispered to me as though she heard the deep withheld meaning that the song had.

I swallowed quickly. "What?"

"Sora, what's happened to us?" She said slowly but not much louder. "Things have changed that much, huh?" I felt like she was reading my mind.

"Whatever it is, I wish it would go away." I replied to her feeling the slow sting of heartbreak coming on.

"Me too…" All of her background noise ceased.

"Maybe…" I sighed trying hard to stay focused enough not to break down over the phone. "Maybe being far away for this long isn't what's best for us."

"Yeah…" I heard her sniffle. "I didn't want this to happen to us, Sora."

"I know, me either. But maybe this is what's really meant to be…" My breathes were getting caught in my chest as I tried to keep my composure. "Kairi, I think this is where we officially go our separate ways…"

It was silent except for her muffled cries. Tears slid down my face but I held my breath to stay quiet. I hated this. "I love you." She said softly.

"I love you too…" I heard a beep and I looked down to see that our call had ended.

After nearly five years together, we called it off. That was where I had finally hit my downfall. My first year of college was hard but knowing that Kairi wasn't apart of the future nearly killed me. We still kept in contact and stayed decently close. It was when we agreed to start seeing other people is when it started leaving me feeling empty.

We kept on moving though. We stayed friends, but it was as distant as we were physically. It was once in a blue moon that we would end up talking. The summer before our junior year of college was when I learned that Kairi had a boyfriend.

His name was Squall and he was everything she seems to need. She said he was tall, mysterious, handsome, mature, and he's always there for her. It was nice to hear that there was someone looking out for her. She seemed happy and I felt heart broken. Riku told me that I needed to move on but we all knew that I'd still love her the same.

I tried to go out on dates. I spent time with girls who I thought would fit me fairly well. It felt like it was working for the most part, but it wasn't until whoever I was with brought up something about making it official, going to their house for some time alone, or brought up anything that was supposed to bring us "closer"- that only pushed me further away and made me miss Kairi. She was my first and only love, the only person I made it official with, the only one I would spend some alone time with at our houses, and the only person I wanted to be close to. She was the one I was going to marry.

It was the summer after graduation… things had finally changed for good.

"You're invited to a very special day. A day to join two people as one. A true ceremony of love. On July 10, 2010, please join us to celebrate the wedding of Kairi Hikari and Squall Leonhart." I read allowed to Riku, who was my roommate.

"Wow…" He said looking up from the couch. I let myself fall back next to him. "Are you okay?"

"I don't know." I said staring off through the window as I let the invite hang loosely in my hand. I never imagined by age 23 to be sitting with Riku, getting an invite to Kairi's wedding to someone other than me. "I still love her…"

I swallowed down my pride and let some tears fall. Riku gave me a couple reassuring pats to the back. He took the invite and moved it to the coffee table, before turning on the television in hopes to drown out my mind. It didn't work.

x.o.x.o.x.

It was only a week and a half until the wedding. Kairi was coming back home tomorrow to help with the finishing plans. She managed to get a hold of Riku while I was out. I only knew this because when I arrived home, I saw him mouth "Kairi" to me and point to the phone he was talking on. I gave him a small nod to acknowledge that I understood before walking past him toward my bedroom.

"Hey, Sora!" Riku called to me from the living room. I could hear him coming down the hall. He stood in the doorway. "Kairi wants to catch up with you."

"Huh?" I was staring at a picture of Riku, Kairi, and myself at our high school graduation.

"Kairi will be in town tomorrow morning. She wants to meet up with you for coffee a little later." He was smirking.

Kairi wants to see me again? Oh god. "Sora, chill out." Riku laughed.

I looked at him quickly. "How do you know that I'm freaking out?"

"I've known you for twenty years." This was true. We're more like brothers than best friends. "Why are you freaking out so bad, anyway?"

I sat at the edge of my bed. "Kairi and Squall have been together for two years. Kairi and I were together for almost five. What if we go and it's her dream wedding? I wasn't meant to go to her wedding unless I was part of it."

Riku walked in and sat next to me. "I know you're hurt by Kairi marrying someone. You love her, don't you?" I nodded while I stared at the carpet. "Well, I know it's hard to hear it, but you really need to let Kairi be happy. At least that's what it sounds like when we just talked. Just go meet up with her tomorrow and be there for her, be there for her like you always have." I knew Riku was right but I knew it was going to be hard. Things were always going to change- there was never a set path.

It was two in the afternoon and Kairi was officially back in town with her fiancé. I sat waiting at the Starbucks that we used to hang out at. My legs kept bouncing from the floor as I awaited her arrival. I stared at my phone- torn between wanting her to call to cancel, and it just never ringing and hearing from her.

The automatic doors slid open. Kairi, who was wearing a thin sweater and ripped jeans, walked in looking around. This was the first time I had seen her since the night she left. She looked almost the exact same except she obviously looked older. Kairi still left me in awe.

Her eyes finally met mine. A radiant smile brightened her entire being. "Sora!" She called out excitedly. I stood up with a faint smile and she ran over to me, nearly knocking me over with a hug. "Oh my god, I've missed you…" she whispered into my shoulder.

I tightened my grip, inhaling her sweet strawberry scent. "I've missed you too, Kai."

She let go and sat down next to me with a smile still plastered to her face. I sat down too and nudged over a caramel latte- her favorite.

"You remembered!" she seemed so happy. I smiled softly as I admired her. "So, fill me in. It's been forever and I feel like so much has changed."

We have, apparently… "Well, obviously, we've just graduated. I did earn my bachelors in business and Riku minored business and got a bachelors in political science. We share an apartment near the campus. I still work at the insurance company."

"Sounds nice," she smiled. "I thought Riku wanted a sports degree?" Kairi asked taking a drink of her latte.

"He changed his mind."

"Oh." She nodded.

"What about you?"

"Well I did get my degree in nursing as planned. Squall, who I call Leon, proposed to me on our one year anniversary." Kairi held out her hand and her engagement ring seemed to slap me in the face with its taunting, magnificent glare.

I smiled politely as she brought her hand close to her again to adjust it. "Where's Leon?" I asked not sure if I was allowed to call him that.

She smiled. "Oh, he's just catching up on sleep at my parent's house. Long flight."

We sat in silence for a bit while we enjoyed our coffee. Neither of us looked at each other. I cleared my throat. "So who's in the wedding?"

Kairi looked me. I think she knew where I was going with this. "Well, I stayed in contact with Namine, Xion, and Selphie, so they're still in. Uh, I met this girl, Yuffie, in college, so she's my other bridesmaid."

"Are you happy?" I asked nervously.

"What?" I caught her off guard.

I couldn't look at her anymore without it hurting. "Are you happy?" I asked again, except slower.

"Yes, I'm happy." Her voice was soft. I looked up. She wasn't smiling, yet she wasn't frowning. There was no sense of feeling or emotion in her face.

"What happened?" My leg started to twitch again.

"I don't know." Kairi got up and sat a little closer to me. "Sora, I never wanted us to break up…"

"I didn't either." I replied.

"I didn't like how far away we were, but I never stopped loving you. I always talked about you like we never broke up. Seeing you now reassures my feelings, Sora." Kairi sighed, "but I'm getting married."

But I'm getting married… those words sunk into my soul deeper than any other words before. "Nothing really lasts forever apparently. I had to make a choice that was not mine. I had to say goodbye for the last time…" I said looking away. "It was what I had to do for us. It was what we needed. I didn't want us to break up either, Kai. I thought I would never see you again after I heard you had moved on."

"It wasn't easy Sora." Her hand found its way to my wrist- her voice was persistent. I looked up to meet her gorgeous purple-blue eyes. I felt my heart thump loudly in my head as I remembered all the reasons why I loved her so much.

I cleared my throat as I leaned in just enough to inhale her intoxicating scent once more. "Tell me it's over between us- I'll still love you the same. But I think I should be on my way. I'm not going to stop you from being with Leon."

"Sora…" I saw her swallow hard.

"I don't want to stop you from being happy." I smiled softly at her. "I'll always love you Kairi, but I know when I need to back down and let you do what you want to do."

Tears had built up in her eyes, threatening to fall. She put her hand against my cheek and smiled sadly. "I'll always love you too."

"You're the best person I have ever crossed paths with Kairi Hikiri, but I think your set path is with the person you're marrying." I took a deep breath in. "I think we were just wishing to marry each other and be happily ever after together… that's not what fate had in mind. I'll always be here when you need me, but I can't stand in your way either."

"I've never loved someone the way I've loved you." Kairi said with her hand on my knee. "No one can ever compare to you. I always hoped to marry you, but it seemed to fall apart too quickly as soon as we went our separate ways. I don't want this to be the end of us."

"I don't either Kai, not in a million years, and it won't be." I nodded as I brushed my fingers through the side of her hair. "We'll always be friends, but I don't want temptations ruining your chance to marry the man of your dreams."

She just looked down as the tears trickled down onto her hands. "Part of me just wants to call it all off and to run away with you but the other part of me is… happy… I can't do that to Leon."

I shook my head instantly. "Don't. As much as it really kills me to tell you to move on, I know you're better with Leon. I'm sure he'll take great care of you. I heard he's going to be a doctor?" She nodded slowly. "A nurse with a doctor," I laughed to myself at this slow process of insanity that was forming in my brain, "perfect."

"Yeah." She hummed to herself as she let a small smile appear for nearly a second. "Perfect."

"I better go." I said standing up. Truth was, I couldn't take it anymore. Seeing Kairi brought back every single memory I had with her instantly. She was the one I wanted with every part of my being and it was taking every ounce of me not to sweep her off her feet and tell her to be with me. I was her first friend, her first best friend, her first crush, her first kiss, her first love, I was even her first time… she was mine. I wanted to claim her so badly, but I couldn't do that. Riku was right- I had to let her be happy.

"What?" Kairi looked up at me with a shocked expression. "Please don't go."

"I have to." I said without looking at her. It would kill me to. "It was good seeing you again. See you at your wedding." My eyes averted to the floor as I began to head out the door into the warm summer sun. I stood at the entrance for a second to comprehend what has just happened before heading across the lot toward my car.

"Sora!" I turned around to see Kairi running out of Starbucks. She caught up to me and put her hand on my arm. Her eyes had a look of worry. "Please. Don't go…" I looked at her wondering what was going to happen between us.

x.o.x.o.x

Author's Note: So that's the first half of my double shot (smiles). Dramatic, no? Anywho, are you curious enough to see what happens?