I do not own any of the characters, they belong to Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman. This is my second Good Omens fan fiction. Some minor slash in later chapters, don't like it, don't read. Rated T mainly for a few uses of language. Reviews would be appreciated.
An Angel, a Demon and a caravan
"Crowley. Lets go on holiday." Aziraphale's voice said quickly down the phone.
It was less than a month after the almost-apocalypse and both the angel and the demon had been feeling a little lost lately. With their mind set on one thing for the past eleven years, they found themselves at a dead end when it came to conversation topics, or what to do with their time. Aziraphale had avoided the demon for pretty much the whole time since, he started opening his small quaint bookshop at regular hours and had even sold the odd book here and there to customers(1). Crowley, however, had spent his time doing something useful: drinking himself silly.
It was a Saturday night, around 7pm when Crowley had got the phone call. He staggered over to answer it, tripping up three times on the way.
"Elllooooo?" He slurred. "If its another of those bloodyyyy sales people you can foooooook offfff."
"Crowley. It's me. 'Ziraphale." The Angels calm voice almost sobered Crowley up immediately. He hadn't heard the Angel for weeks and until now he hadn't realised just how much he missed it.
"Oh, Zira. How are you? I was gonna come see you maybe, but I thought-" Crowley started, feeling the alcohol evaporating from his bloodstream.
"Crowley. Lets go on holiday."
Crowley blinked. Looked at the phone receiver in confusion and returned it to his ear.
"We err…haven't spoke for weeks and you want us to go on holiday?" Crowley was seriously confused.
"Yes. I'm ever so sorry about that. I just didn't know what to say to you in all honesty. That's why I thought a holiday would be good for us - a change of scene, you know? To mark a new beginning too. Please say yes dear. I've made all the arrangements, you wont have to do a thing - just pack your bags."
"What? I mean, yes okay…sure Angel. Thanks…I mean, okay. I'll pack my stuff. How long was you thinking?"
A pause.
"About a week? We leave tomorrow morning. I'll pick you up about 11?"
"Right, okay. Thanks again. See you then 'Zira." Crowley hung up the phone, still slightly confused, however feeling much better now all the alcohol had left his body.
Crowley couldn't help but feel a little excited. It had been years since he had gone on holiday with Aziraphale, the last time(2) had been a delicious blend of sun, booze and girls(3) and he had a feeling this time would be no different. With a flick of his hand, his large black suitcase was jam packed full of sleek black suits, ties and underwear; perfect for pulling girls. Crowley smiled to himself as he tucked up into bed, his suitcase ready by the door for when Aziraphale arrived in the morning.
There was a knock on the door at precisely 11am. Crowley opened it to reveal a beaming Aziraphale. A beaming Aziraphale wearing grey shorts and a bright green polo top. A beaming Aziraphale wearing grey shorts, a bright green polo top, a straw hat, brown shoes and white socks…pulled all the way up. Crowley sighed, looking down at his own body, covered beautifully with a designer suit.
"'Zira. What the Hel…Heav…the fuck are you wearing?"
Aziraphale looked down at himself and suddenly felt extremely self conscious.
"I thought it was…appropriate." He frowned. "And no need to swear, dear. You're looking…pleasant."
"Well yes, I thought I'd dress for the occasion." Crowley grinned, grabbing his suitcase and following the Angel out of the door, and into the quiet street.
"Ah." Aziraphale muttered as he reached his vehicle.
"Where are we going anyw…ay." Crowley stopped as he looked up.
Aziraphale had come to a pause in front of a caravan.
"Aziraphale. Why have you stopped at a caravan?" Crowley muttered, half hoping that instead of answering, Aziraphale would simply run away back to his bookshop.
"Because, Crowley, this is the vehicle I'm going to drive. Besides, it's a camper van…not a caravan. You Don't drive a caravan you see, whereas a CAMPER VAN you do drive as well as staying in. You get me? And to answer your question, we are going to the lake district for a whole week of camping. Isn't that great?" Aziraphale grinned.
There was a long pause.
"Oh shit!"
(1) Although he did make sure they were "worthy" beforehand.
(2) 1953 perhaps. Although, now he thought of it, was it 1958?
(3) Of course, it had only been Crowley who had experienced the third highlight of the trip, since Aziraphale had refused to sin, completely ignoring the fact he had already committed sins of sloth and gluttony on the holiday.
So guys what do you think? Please review, whether the feedback is good or bad. Thanks for reading. Chapter 2 coming soon I promise.
