Punked, Bankai Edition
by Nathan J Xaxson

Disclaimer: I don't own Bleach. If I did, I wouldn't be able to write fan fiction, now could I?

"THAT'S IT!"

Shunsui Kyoraku knew that look. He had crossed the line. "Ne, kawaii Nanao-chan ---"

"Don't you 'kawaii Nanao-chan' me!" she fumed, glasses refracting her blazing red reiatsu so that he couldn't see her eyes. "That's the last time you're ever going to pinch my butt again!" She reached into her sleeve to pull out her zanpakuto, a small golden tanto.

"Whoa, Nanao-chan, I'm sure we can discuss this-" Shunsui was quite possibly the only person that knew Nanao Ise had achieved bankai, and he only knew this from the last time she had used it on him. It had taken months for the effects to wear off, and he didn't want to imagine what she would do to him this time.

"Bankai," she spat, her tanto taking the form of a golden fountain pen.

Kyoraku fell to his knees. "Nanao-san, please! I'll quit drinking for an entire month!"

Nanao cackled a vengeful, spiteful laugh as she opened the giant book she always carried around, thumbing through it until she found an open page. "Let's see, now... hmmm.... Aha! I got it!" she began rubbing her hands evilly.

"I will do all the paperwork, too!"

Nanao began writing, a sadistic glee in her voice as she dictated his punishment. "8th squad captain.... Shunsui Kyoraku... is... now... a... eunuch."

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

Heh heh heh heh.... c'mon, you know you laughed. Reviews, please! -njx