Author's Note: This is my first ever published fic. So go easy...constructive criticism is very much welcomed, but if you are going to flame, don't bother. I must warn you, this fic will be quite dark, I prefer it that way, I don't really write happy, fun loving fics all that well. I'm all for humour and romance, but that is about it lol. So if you're looking for something to brighten your day, then this is not the fic for you.

Summary: A normal life had always been her hearts greatest desire, yet it always seemed just out of her reach as sanity seemed a constantly weakening thread. How will she survive when chaos comes knocking? Set between TF1 and ROTF.

I just want to say a big thank you to: Consciously Comatose, and I am not Rahna. Honest. - They helped me out big time. So thank you very much! And last but not least, I want to say a HUGE thank you to Faecat. Because without her, this fic would not exist. She is a fantastic woman and helped me out so much. I was a stuck in the mud with no idea what to do and she was kind enough to help me out with a lot of things, so this is dedicated to you! Thank you, Faecat.

I highly recommend that you go and read Faecat's Transformers fic "Science and Fiction" IT'S GOLD.

(A/N2: This chapter has been slightly edited, so if you have read it in the past there is no need to re-read it. Alright? ^^)

Sanity Aside.

Chapter 1.

Felix was beyond tired. Sleep seemed to be eluding her these past few nights. It was agonizing. Her body begged for rest, her eyes were sore and dry. Her reaction time was slow, and everything appeared as if it was moving in slow motion at times, but, no matter what she did, no matter what medication she took...the dreams, the voices...they wouldn't stop. Every time she closed her eyes, easing into the darkness that was sleep, images flashed before her eyes. Places she had never been, people she had never met before and the voices. At first they whispered, gradually becoming louder and louder before she could no longer listen to them.

She couldn't understand a word they said. It sounded like several people talking at once, each saying a different thing, down a long, winding tunnel, echoing all around her.

The nightmares she had gradually got worse. The intense feeling of grief, anger...sadness. Surrounded by nothing but war and death. Everything seemed so...real. She could feel it. Her heart was heavy with loss and her mind frantic, alert, as if watching, waiting for something to jump out of the shadows and attack her.

Blowing wispy strands of hair away from her face, she rolled onto her side and curled up into the comfort of the bed, silently wishing she could fall asleep; all she wanted was to rest. She didn't care for how long--an hour, 5 minutes... anything. She just wanted a peaceful, dreamless sleep where she wouldn't wake up in a panic screaming at the top of her lungs.

She was thankful that her neighbors paid no heed to the blood-curdling screams at the early hours of the morning; they were used to it by now. Did she even have neighbors any more? Felix didn't know. Her apartment was one amongst several, though some people didn't feel comfortable living above a computer shop that was open at peculiar hours. She shook the thought away, what did she care if the store owner dabbled in shady business? He allowed her to stay in the apartment above his shop for free and offered her a part-time job. Why should she care what crooked dealings he had a hand in?

Felix noticed a small bundle curled up contently beside her. The soft, white fur gently moved in the passing breeze that danced in through the open window. She gave a small twitch of a smile as she reached over and brushed her fingers through the velvet coat of the fluffy Turkish Angora. He had pristine blue eyes and the most gorgeous snow colored hide she had ever seen. He wasn't her pet, though; he was a stray. She made a habit of leaving her window open during the night, allowing the homeless cat refuge in her home. She often left him a small tray of food and water in the kitchen. She had even bought him a small, purple flea collar.

Felix never wanted nor needed the companionship of another human being, she often turned to animals or the Internet to ease her social needs. People frightened Felix, and she hated them. They were greedy, selfish and evil creatures. She had great difficulty trusting any one of them.

Animals were a different story. She could trust animals, that was why she trusted her unofficial pet cat, Kirby.

The silent veil of night slowly faded away as the sun crept above the horizon, stretching its rays across the rooftops and surfaces of the earth, bathing it in light and warmth.

A loud, irritating beeping noise startled Kirby. He sprung to his feet, eyes darting in every direction searching for danger.

"It's okay, boy, it's just the alarm clock," she soothed, reaching over towards her nightstand to find the space empty. She frowned.

Clothes flew across the room in a whirlwind as Felix tossed them up into the air searching her mess of a room for that annoying beeping clock that was driving her even further into insanity. Kirby scampered off of the bed in panic when a pair of denim jeans flew through the air, almost hitting the poor feline. He poked his head around the safety of the bedroom door, watching the crazed woman toss and throw objects around the room carelessly in her fruitless attempt to find the clock.

"I give up!" She huffed irritably, pulling her tangled hair out of her face. She looked around the room and grimaced at its condition. To say it was messy would be putting things lightly. It looked as if a fight had broken out between two rabid animals. Clothes, paper, books, and trash laid all over the floor and bed.

"...I'll clean that up later," she mumbled quietly under her breath, stepping precariously over the mounds of clothes.

Kirby gave a soft meow, trotting elegantly after the disheveled woman as she walked barefoot down the dark hall towards the kitchen. He hopped up onto the green tiled counter effortlessly and watched her with eager, hungry eyes, his long fluffy tail swishing back and forth gracefully. His blue eyes seemed to brighten when Felix pulled herself up onto the counter, her short height prohibiting her from reaching the top cupboard shelf. A small, brightly colored box in her grasp she hopped back down, the contents rattling loudly with her movement.

Kirby jumped excitedly at the sight of the box. He knew what it was, and desperate wanted to sink his teeth into the cat kibble.

"Alright, calm yourself," Felix smiled as she poured the fish shaped biscuits into a ceramic bowl.

When Felix began to fix her own breakfast, the loud, irritating noise of the apartment buzzer interrupted her. Felix grumbled a string of profanities under her breath, stomping her way towards the door, pressing the small button with unneeded force.

"What?" she barked rudely into the speaker.

"Good morning to you too, sweetheart," the amused voice of her landlord and boss replied. "You just up?"

"I didn't sleep much last night," Felix grumbled tiredly, rubbing her sore eyes.

"Yeah, so I heard. Maybe you should go see a doctor--"

"Is there a reason you're here, Frankie, or are you just going to give me a lecture?" Felix groused angrily, glaring heatedly at the speaker phone attached to the wall.

He sighed into the receiver. "Alright, calm yer'self. I need you to cover the shop for a few hours, I'm heading down town."

Great, that was all she needed. Tired, hungry, agitated and now he was asking her to work in his store. She hated it. It was dirty, it was hot, and it smelt like a farm house. Not to mention she couldn't stand the customers. "Can't you get your lazy nephew to do it?" she whined softly, silently hoping he would.

"He's out of town! Look, just do this for me, alright? I'll bring you back something nice, okay?" He said exasperatedly.

"Fine!" she yelled back just as loudly into the receiver and cutting Frankie off.

Felix turned back towards the counter to see Kirby, giving her a strange, almost amused look. "Looks like we're working today, Kirbs."

Her feline companion gave a soft meow in response. "I know, I know. I don't want to either. But, the guy lets us stay here for free...." she said, glancing around her small apartment. "Even if it is a dump."

After grabbing an unhealthy breakfast that consisted of nothing but sugar, Felix threw on a pair of frayed denim jeans and a simple black tank top. She didn't feel the need to brush her hair, only bothering to pull it up into a messy ponytail. With a nod of approval at her reflection she crawled over the bundle of sheets on her bed and grabbed her rectangular red glasses from the bedside cabinet.

"Kirbs!" she called out for her companion. He was no where to be seen and had kept it that way since breakfast. She sighed. It looked like she was going to be working in the shop by herself. Joy oh joy. At least if she had Kirby with her, she wouldn't feel so...lonely. Felix shook the thought away--she didn't need that cat any more than he needed her!

Her bare feet brushed against the blackened metal of the fire escape, sending a shiver crawling up her spine. Her eyes gazed out at the run down, abandoned buildings that lined the streets. It seemed hardly anyone lived here, she barely ever saw anyone during the day. Felix turned back towards the window and reached through, grabbing a pair of dirty sneakers and quickly slipping them on to her feet.

She cautiously made her way towards the fire escape ladder. Gripping the rusted, cold rails in her hands tightly, Felix moved quickly down the three flights of cast iron steps. As she neared the bottom, she grabbed onto the rail and quickly hoisting her body up and over. Her feet landed with a soft thump against the dirty asphalt of the ally. Her nose scrunched up in disgust as the rancid odor of garbage, urine, and other, unnamed and equally disgusting things invaded her nose.

The computer shop that Frankie owned looked run down and dirty. The sign above the door was faded, the paint was chipped; you could barely read it. The window was covered in smears and dirt making it almost impossible to see inside. Maybe that was a good thing. If they saw what was inside the shop no one would think to step inside.

The small bell above the door tinkled softly as she opened and quickly closed it behind her.

Frankie looked up from his newspaper and gave Felix a wide smile. She cringed. His teeth were either black or missing, and she wasn't quite sure which was worse. "Took yer time!" Frankie said as he scratched the top of his balding head.

Felix said remained quiet, making her way across the shop floor, trying her hardest to ignore the unpleasant smell of his body. Before she even reached the counter Frankie was already standing from his seat, pulling his coat over his shoulders.

"See if yer can fix that computer 'round the back, eh, love?" Felix glared disapprovingly at the "affectionate" nickname he had used. "Don't scare any of me customers off," he said, giving her a playful wink.

"I won't." Felix had no idea why the man had asked her to watch the shop for him, it wasn't like people were clambering to get inside. Hell, she would be surprised if she saw a single customer!

She shook her head for the umpteenth time that day and slowly made her way to the back of the shop where Frankie kept most of the computers that needed to be fixed or thrown out.

Felix gave a soft hum and she sat in front of the prehistoric looking computer. She wasn't entirely sure what to do with it, her experience with computers was...limited. She stared at the thick, dusty screen with disdain. It was probably older than she was!

"Now... what to do with you?" She whispered curiously to the computer. She leaned to the side and gazed down at the tower with a raised brow. It looked to be white once but now... it was an odd yellow tinge and thick with dust. She half wondered if it even still worked.

Tons of chunky black cords were connected to the back of the tower. Everything seemed to be where it should be, so why wouldn't it work? Felix frowned, giving the computer a strange look as if it would spring to life.

She stood up from the chair and leaned over the back of the wide, dusty screen, for a better look. Given the...age of the machine, she wouldn't be surprised if it had given up the ghost already.

Oh well. She shrugged carelessly.

Now what was she supposed to do with it? Frankie had asked her to fix it...but it didn't even turn on, so what was the point? She contemplated taking the side off of the tower so she could prod and poke about inside. Maybe that would do the trick? It was worth a try. It's not like she could break it.

Her hands brushed against the cool metal, she slid her palms over the side, trying to find an easy way to pull the side off without having to resort to brute force.

"Oh, come on!" Felix was slowly beginning to lose her patience, she leaned over the tower, groping the sides. She paused in her search, glancing up at the dim strip light of the back room as it flickered threateningly.

A prickling feeling suddenly began to spread across her body, causing her to bolt up right when an almost electrical shock sensation coursed through her body. She let out a sharp gasp when a horrific pain slammed into her skull, forcing her eyes tightly shut. She desperately tried to pull her hands away, but she couldn't. It felt like they were welded to the computer tower. She struggled and pulled but it only made the pain worsen.

A soft whimper rolled from her lips, hundreds of images and words flashed through her mind painfully. It felt as if her skull was being squeezed to the point of breaking. She tried to pull away from the sensation but it kept dragging her back forcefully.

"Let go, let go, let go, let go!" she whispered urgently, over and over. It felt like her mind was being torn away from her body.

Sweat began to trickle down the side of her face and her body trembled violently. Felix could feel her heart thrashing wildly in her chest, trying desperately to keep up with the strain. She struggled frantically to breathe under the intense pressure that was surrounding her.

What was happening? Why couldn't she let go? Why did it hurt so much? Her mind was frantic and it even hurt to think as information poured itself into her mind. She couldn't do anything to stop it, no matter how unbearable.

"Just let go...." A whisper of a voice spoke reassuringly, echoing all around her.

Felix screamed as her mind was pulled further away from her, plunging into darkness.

"Sir!" A man shouted urgently, he rushed across the room in front of several large screens. "We've got a problem."

General Morshower gave the young officer an expectant look. His shoulders tensed at the man's frantic expression, "What is it, soldier?"

"S-someone's hacking into our system, sir!" He stuttered nervously under the General's hard gaze. Sweat trickled down the side of his face as he handed the report paper to the General.

Morshower quickly snatched the piece of paper from the trembling man's hand. His brow furrowed when he read over the report. "Tell me, solider. How does something like this happen a second time after we spent millions of tax dollars doubling our security?"

"I-I...I don't know sir," he gulped nervously, the General continued to stare down at him. "T-there's something else...."

He stiffened, his jaw clenched tightly. "Something else?"

"T-the hacker has breached into our restricted files, s-sir...a-and..."

"And?" he asked impatiently, clenching his fists tightly at his sides.

"I-It's the N.E.S.T. files, sir! T-there also seems to be some sort of strange signal transmitting through the internal server."

"Be more specific, solider! What kind of strange signal?" His eyes narrowed dangerously.

"I d-don't know, but it's s-similar to the hacking incident back at Q-Qatar, sir," he took in a shaky breath, trying to sooth his trembling nerves.

Morshower suddenly spun on his heel, looking expectantly at the many men and women inside the room. "I want to know the location and I want to know now!" His commanding voice bellowed through the room, instantly grabbing the attention of its occupants. "Get Captain Lennox on the line!"

I hope you enjoyed it, I really do. I would really, REALLY like some feedback on this. The next chapter will be action packed and the Autobots WILL be there! I promise you that. Please review!! And make it nice XD

Let me know what you thought. If you have any questions regarding my fic, then please do not hesitate to PM me!