Author's note: I gotta say, random connections are always fabulous when I let the mind wander. ^_^ Story takes place post-DMC4.

Messy Morph

A loud pounding on the front doors sat Dante from the leather couch he lounged on. The noise resumed its rhythmic insistence and he knew it was a customer and not a psycho demon. Demons never knocked.

"Lady, can you get that?" he called out to the woman who was stooped at the open mini fridge and was technically in less of a position to answer than the door than he. He didn't see the appeal of its drinks to her; nearly the whole inside was stocked with something boozy and she wasn't the rowdiest drinker.

Lady shook her raven head and stood. "You're so lazy."

"I'm saving my strength." Dante yawned for the hell of it.

She sighed and closed the fridge door with her foot. As she crossed the room, she took out a pistol from her holster. Dante was about to tell her the person outside was indeed a person, but he then closed his mouth. Lady wouldn't listen, anyway.

Lady eased opened the door and a sniffling brunette awaited on the doorstep. She held a small handbag against her chest. When she saw Lady, she looked a little surprised. "D-Dante? Is Dante here?" she asked in a small voice.

"Hey Dante, it's a date of yours." Lady spoke over her shoulder at him as she replaced her handgun.

"I-I'm not." The guest stood taller. She squeezed her bag tighter but suddenly released her tight grip and patted it.

Raising a curious eyebrow, Lady held the door open. "Do come in, then."

The frazzled girl entered hesitantly and glanced around. As soon as she saw Dante, she rushed over. She came so fast, for a moment Dante thought she was going to jump on top of him. Not that he'd mind, he thought upon quick inspection. She was a stellar babe, with a ponytail and nice rack, and who looked awfully like Nero's girl-

"Kyrie?" Dante then recognized her, matching his foggy memory to the face. He hadn't seen her lately. Whoops, the kid Nero was going to maul him for thinking of his girlfriend as such.

Kyrie nodded, tears glittering in her eyes. "I'm glad you're here. I need your help."

"Yeah. Yeah, of course." Dante swung his feet down and sat up like a proper gentleman, even scooting over to give her room to join him. He informed Lady who Kyrie was since they hadn't met each other until today. Dante turned back to Kyrie. "Tell me what's wrong."

"Nero. He's in trouble. I didn't know who else to go to." Kyrie fiddled with the handle of her purse as she lowered herself.

A hell dimension or taken prisoner by some kinky mistress of pain; Dante already unwound his tape roll of mental imagination. "What happened to him?"

She looked down. "He's not himself."

"Relationship issues?" Honestly, Dante wasn't in the mood to play matchmaker.

Kyrie sniffled again. She unzipped her bag and reached inside, presumably for a tissue. What appeared was far from a tissue. A blue frog poked its head out. A horizontal red stripe stretched around its belly. Its eyes, ocular and sky blue were darting around in a panic. As soon as the frog caught sight of Dante, it began thrashing in the handbag.

"Uh, amphibians aren't really my forte," Dante slowly confessed as Kyrie cooed to the spasmodic pet.

Kyrie lifted the frog from the confines of her bag. When she did this, the creature calmed considerably. "N-Nero." Her lips trembled.

Dante's mouth fell open. This slippery thing was Nero? Only one way to find out. "Kid, how're you doin'?" he goaded.

The frog shook a floppy arm at him, protesting, it seemed. Dante then saw the small arm was a maroon color and it glowed blue, right down to its clawed hand. "Fantastic! Like peaches 'n cream. What do you think?" its chirpy voice responded hotly.

"It's him! It's really him! Hey, Lady, take a look at Kyrie's new pet!" Dante hooted.

Frog Nero rebelled. "I'm not a frog!"

Lady walked over and bent low, exposing her plunging neckline. "Aw, such a cutie."

Nero made a squawking noise at seeing Lady and turned his head away. A purplish hue spread on his face. Kyrie, casting her gaze on Lady, saw what Nero was getting excited over and she looked smitten.

Dante patted Nero on top of the head, knowing the gesture would annoy him immensely. "Yes, a cute froggy."

"Seriously, I'm not! I feel the same. I just look like one!" Nero objected and swatted Dante's hand off with his tiny pad of a hand. "It's a curse. It's a hex! Get me outta here!" He hopped madly on his hind legs in Kyrie's hands. The fretful woman coaxed him once more.

"So how did you end up like this?" Dante was genuinely trying his hardest not to laugh. If roles were reversed, he'd be raising hell himself.

"A job. Tracking some slithery demon. I got it cornered but it hit me with something vile. A gunky fluid I don't want to pinpoint its exact origins." For the first time, Dante heard a frog sigh and hang its head. "Man, I hope this state isn't permanent."

From atop the steps at the back of the office, the busty blonde Trish sauntered down, each wooden step creaking. "Oh, Dante, you're out of soap in the bathroom up there- hmm, what's happening?" She neared them. She spotted Nero and exclaimed, "A frog! Wow, how adorable. The Underworld never had such cute ones." She glibly reached out and tickled Nero's belly without even asking permission.

A round of laughter sounded but was cut short when Nero keeled over. Kyrie began to fan his prostrate form.

Confused at the staring faces, Trish shrugged. "What? Was it something I said?"