Bugger.

The word that summed everything up nicely. If my life was a word then that would be it. It would definitely be my favourite word if I was asked to pick one. Not that anyone would ever ask me to. But if they did then I would know what to say. With that decision firmly decided upon and planted in my mind for future reference I turned my attention back to the reason that I had first used the word. Well not first used it. I'd used it before that moment, but now I had a new reason to use it. My boat was leaking.

Now, in my experience, there is never a good time to have a leaking boat. Maybe that's not strictly true it's useful if it's someone else's boat that sinking, but when it's your own boat it's not so good. Actually it wasn't technically my own boat, but why linger over the insignificant details? It was the boat I was on and that is the point. It had been a good day until my boat, or rather; the boat had started to leek. I glanced up at Port Royale one last time, felt myself fill with hate and looked back down again. It was a problem that had to be fixed if I were to reach the hateful little place. I jumped down from the mast to bail it out. Water sprang up around my boots as I splashed down. Bugger, now I had wet feet. I scrambled around for a bucket and scooped some of it out. I watched it slosh over the side to join its other watery friends. I glanced up for a fraction of a second, but it was enough to stop my in my tracks. The rotting corpses grinned back at me from where they hung, swinging in the wind with broken necks.

I was not an unusual sight. In fact it was getting to be all too common. I stood up and took off my hat, nodding my respects to them. A fourth noose swung empty with a sign dangling down from it. I squinted at it. Pirates, ye be warned. Whoever wrote that had very bad handwriting. Was it meant to scare me off? Was I meant to believe that fourth noose was waiting for me? Did that git Norrington think he could catch me? Well think again mate, unlike those poor bastards you've got hanging there I'm not stupid enough to get caught. I plopped my hat back on my head and grinned. I love my hat. It's the best thing in the world… apart from rum. Rum's good.

The boat was a lost cause. Even I could see that. Good job there were plenty of boats where I was headed. None of them were mine of course, but that hadn't stopped me in the past. One day I'd have my own ship back. Hopefully soon. I sighed and climbed back onto the mast. I stood up straight and with pride as if nothing at all was wrong with boat. The goons of Port Royale stopped what they were doing and stared at me. Can't say I blame them. It was either because the boat I was standing on was partially submerged below the waves or because of my infinite good looks and charm and of course my infamous reputation. I kept my chin up and hoped it was for the latter reason. They really were idiots; it was hard to tell their gasps apart from the baa of a goat at one point. I shouldn't have been surprised. You'd have to be an idiot to live in Port Royal. Nothing good ever came out of there. And nothing ever will, you mark my words.

I suck out my foot as the jetty drew nearer and when it came into contact with the wood I stepped smoothly off. This was going well so far. Apart from the whole leaking boat thing, but that was behind me now. I strode off along the jetty hoping that if I appeared to be confident enough the harbourmaster wouldn't spot me.

"You there!"

Bugger.

I spun around on my heels to face him. I dazzled him with my most charming smile, but if I'm honest he didn't look all that dazzled… or charmed. How odd, it usually worked on Scarlette and Gisele and those other wenches. Maybe it was because they were of the female variety. I approached the harbourmaster. He frowned at me disapprovingly. Pirate prejudice was something I'd have to get used to in this snobby town. Still, as long as he didn't see my pirate brand then he couldn't prove anything. I walked back over to him, back the way I'd just come still smiling, but his disapproving look didn't shift. "It's a shilling to tie up your boat at the docks." I raised my eyebrows at him and then at the boat, the mast of which was only just visible. He ignored my look, "and I shall need to know your name."

He looked down at the book he held open, poised and ready to write down whatever name I was to give him. As if I would! That would get me arrested for sure. I rummaged about in my pocket my fingers felt the cool of three coins. I pulled them out and slid them onto the open pages of his book. "What do you say to three shillings and we forget the name?" I suggested. He blinked at the money and looked up at me as if he had completely misjudged me- which he had. He snapped his book closed on the coins in case I decided to suddenly snatch them back.

"Welcome to Port Royale Mr Smith," he said brightly. I nodded my thanks. Stupid blighter. And Smith? Not exactly very original now, was it? I walked away from him and just before I rounded a corner spotted a small leather purse. I picked it up, looked around and shook it. The cheerful rattle of coins was the only sound. No shouts from the owner of the purse. Perfect. Now the owner of the purse was me. I pocketed it and continued on my way.

People like me aren't exactly welcome in Port Royal. We are very far from welcome, but that's fine. We don't want to go anywhere as rubbish as this anyway. Not usually, but needs must and that's why I was there. Because I needed to be. I planned on being as quick as was humanly possible. The looks I got from people as I wandered down their streets really summed up the way I felt about them and their stupid little town. I gritted my teeth and reminded myself that I would be out of here soon enough. The place even smelt funny. Not half as good as Tortuga. Now that was a place worth visiting. It was alive and exciting, not like this dull, sleepy Port full of empty people and their empty lives. It was more of a prison than anywhere you would want to live and yet people imprisoned themselves here by choice and sneered at people like me who chose freedom over everything else.

There weren't that many people around so I could walk a bit more openly than if I had been there on a more normal day. Those that were around were the sorts that give me a look as if I smelt as bad as they did, but let me walk on. Anyone who would scream for my instant execution was up at the Fort and this was the reason I had chosen today as my day to gatecrash the hellish town. It was bloody Norrington's bloody promotion. It said a lot about the King's Navy that they would reward an idiot and his supreme idiocy with a promotion. This was, however, good for me because it meant that most military concentration was at the Fort and Port Royale was as safe as it could be for me. Not that I was stupid enough to get caught if there was normal military routines… or that they were smart enough to catch me. I grinned at my own intelligence. I really was a genius. I've never met anyone like me. Thank God. If I met me I think I'd end up killing me. Not that I'm annoying. Not at all. I'm just too perfect, that's what it is.

"This dock is off-limits to civilians." One of two red-coated buffoons said as he stepped between me and the Navy vessel I was aiming for. It wiped the grin at my own perfection off my lips. Complications I hadn't been expecting had arrived. Maybe Norrington wasn't as stupid as I thought.

Bugger.

Hey.

For people who don't know this is a spin-off from my other Pirates series, so it features all my OCs and follows the same plot, but don't worry, you don't have to have read the original series to get this one. It's from Jack's point of view and I would really appreciate it if you all gave me you're honest opinion on whether I've got him right or not. He's hard to write.

Reviews as loved and appreciated as those who give them.

LV XX