"Never lose your child-like enthusiasm, and good things will come your way."

This was the PS my godfather finished with in his letter from prison. He very artfully avoided the topic which had gotten him in so much trouble, probably because his lawyer was going for an appeal. I didn't mind not getting the details, but it would be nice to know why he was facing life in prison.

Other than that, it was a letter of very good news, at least to me. Godfather Ray left me a present even my parents didn't want to get me for my graduation, hadn't even thought of trying to get: a house. And not just any house, a mansion, made of bricks and over a hundred years old with new appliances added in. It came with three acres of gardens, complete with apple tree and a lily-pond. He also, God bless his twisted soul, left me a monthly allowance of 500 dollars, which I already had access to.

I may only have been eighteen, but I moved straight out of my parents' house and was already settled into my palace within a week. It was very big and a little lonely, but that didn't really bother me; I was too busy making sure there were no broken windows, that the plumbing still ran water, that the snakes and bats vacated the house, and that the fridge was stocked.

Then there was the decorating, my favorite part. I painted the walls dark greens and reds and oranges, trying to follow my uncle's favorite philosophy. I kept his antique furniture and added some things of my own: a red plastic skeleton tree in my room, a sewing room filled with threads, clothes, and ribbons of every color, a painting room covered with art supplies I rarely even used…

When I was finished, I decided to tackle the hardest part of the house: the garden, where I had thrown the animals I didn't want to live with. It was overrun with weeds and mostly dying. I couldn't figure out why Ray even bought the place: he hated the outdoors almost as much as he hated animals.

I spent an entire week de-weeding and spreading Miracle-Gro on the land. I was pretty sure there was a flower-patch by the pond, but it could just have been very pretty weeds. Most of the animals seemed to go out of their way to avoid me, even when I came by the start of woods at the edge of the property.

And life went on. I put out an ad to try and find a job, and sat around the house until my monthly check came and I had to drive to town to cash it. The banker didn't believe I was eighteen until I showed her my ID, something that pisses me off but happens very often. I look very young, even for my age, probably more like a 12 year old, especially with my heavy brown curls and little-girl dresses.

After I finally got my money, I went to the market and bought some cheap food that could last a month, mostly canned soups and fruit cocktail, and other stuff like that. And I was walking the mile and a half home when the rabbit jumped me. It wasn't like it was attacking me, more like it was running from an attack. Sure enough, no sooner did I get him in my grocery bag than we were approached by a plump red fox. It blinked at me almost like it would jump on me anyways, than turned it fat tail around and left.

I stared after it for a minute to make sure it was gone, then let the heavy white rabbit out and kept walking along the road. But when I looked behind me, the rabbit was hopping along after me. It twitched its nose like it knew I was watching, then started clawing at my leg like my aunt's baby Nester. "Fine," I grumbled, and scooped him up again. "But I swear, if you take a dump on my groceries, I'll lay you out for that fox."

I was home in almost five minutes, and the rabbit hopped out and blinked at me in a way that was almost smart. "Well," I muttered, "Go on, go home." And then I don't know why in the world I did this, because it made absolutely no sense at all, but I knelt down and told the rabbit, "Tell you what: you can pay me back by sending me a wacky friend and the adventure of my life."

The rabbit sat there for a second, just staring at me with its little blue eyes, then bounced off into the trees. I looked at myself and rolled my eyes, standing up. "What kind of an idiot am I, talking to hitch-hiking bunnies and telling him my wishes? I've been by myself too long and now I'm going nuts."

I went inside and put the groceries away. The house started looking too big and a little creepy now. I couldn't shake off the shivers running up and down my spine, even after I took a shower and turned up the heater. I was sitting on my bed watching the wind swirl around the dead plants when I noticed the rabbit sitting by the edge of my patio. Just sitting there and staring at me like my dear departed goldfish Fiona. I shivered and went for an early nap.

I was having a dream, I could feel it in my gut. But I was still freaking out as the fat white rabbit started bouncing on my stomach, growing bigger and heavier and hurting my gut until-

"ALICE!!"

I rolled out of bed and landed heavily, tangled in my sheets and looking around like a lunatic. I must have been dreaming, but I was sure I heard someone yelling something, even if I wasn't sure what it had been. I struggled back on my mattress and closed my eyes.

"ALLIIICCCEEE!!!"

That was definitely a real voice. I sat up with a fumble and opened my eyes-and screamed when I saw a man handing from my maple tree and rapping at my window. I thought, "Robbers, murderers, rapists, oh God!" I jumped up and fell flat on my face, trying to run for the phone. I had it in my hands, but it fumbled and landed in my trashcan.

I spun around at the man who was still hanging off the branch, and felt extremely confused as he called, "Alice, where are you?"

I didn't know any Alice. My name is Diana, always has been. I frowned at the man and was about to yell that he had the wrong address when the branch snapped and he disappeared in a quick fall. I thought, "What kind of person goes hanging off trees in the middle of the night?" And in a panic I screamed, "Ahh!! Lawsuit!" And I ran quickly down the stairs, hoping to every God I knew that the man was well and couldn't afford a lawyer.

I threw open the door- and stopped in my tracks. The man, in the wackiest outfit I'd ever seen, bowed at me and took off his tall velvet hat. I was about to ask how many shots he'd downed when he listed his head and gave me a half-friendly, half-mysterious grin, revealing pearly teeth.

"Hello again, Alice," he said in a soft voice.

I was about to correct him when he sighed and replaced his hat on his head. "Alice, don't you recognize me? It's me. Mad Hatter."