Title: The Divine Miss P
Author: Trista Groulx
Rated: T (same as the show)
Disclaimer: I do not own these character, they belong to their creator, network, writers, actors and actresses who bring them to life.
Summary: After Morgan hears Garcia say she wants something more from Kevin, he goes to have chat with him. It doesn't turn out as he planned.
Notes: I was writing a part of my Prentiss/Reid story where Garcia gets annoyed at where their relationship is, while hers with Kevin has not gone anywhere, and a plot bunny borrowed in my brain. It could be a little AUey cause Reid and Prentiss are together, but it works as future cannon where Garcia just wants something a little more serious from Kevin. But really it's just a stand alone where Morgan comes to the rescue on his white horse and gets the girl lol.
Derek Morgan was on a mission. He could not believe that he was actually doing this. He walked through the sea of desks. In all of his time at the FBI he had never needed to go up here. It made him happy that Garcia was able to get an office of her own near their work area. Every head perked up as he walked by. He could hear whisperings behind him. They were probably all wondering what someone for the BAU was doing up in the tech area, since they had Garcia. He then saw the young geek he was looking for. He was frantically typing away.
"Lynch," Morgan called, trying to get his attention.
Kevin Lynch looked up, his fingers stopped their journey across the keyboard.. "What brings you up here Agent Morgan?"
"We need to talk. You got a coffee break coming up?"
"I can. What's this about?"
"It's about our girl Garcia."
Lynch looked at the agent confused. "Is something wrong? Did something happen to her?"
"Something's wrong, but nothing has happened to her."
Lynch stood up slowly and followed the agent quietly. He could hear a couple of his co-workers humming the funeral drudge as they walked. Their bad sense of humour was not helping the situation. Lynch was always nervous around Morgan, he was always worried the agent would kick his ass and steal his girlfriend one day. The two men went down to a fairly empty break room.
"Are you going to tell me what is going on now?" asked Lynch, after they had each poured themselves a coffee.
"I just want to talk, man," Morgan assured him, sitting down at a table away from the few people in the room. "Garcia said something that really bugged me the other day."
"And you want me to help, how?"
"I want you to fix it."
"How am I gonna fix it?"
"You are her boyfriend, you're the only who can fix it" Morgan explained. "I'm not sure if you listen to the rumour mill. Have you heard about Prentiss and Reid?"
"I hear a lot of things about those two. Like Reid is really a robot. There is also one going around that Agent Prentiss is a Fembot. There are a lot of rumours floating around about you and Penelope, but I know you didn't come to talk about rumours. Just tell me what this is really about."
"All right, I just wanted to let you know that Penelope is looking for the same treatment from her man as Reid's giving his lady."
"Agent Morgan I highly doubt you know my girlfriend better than I do. She's not looking to settle down, get married and potentially have babies. That's one hell of a rumour you are starting."
Morgan could not believe what this little piss ant was telling him, he was not a gossip. He was actually trying to help the guy, and he accused him of starting another rumour. Morgan had always hated rumours. He never thought that the FBI would be worse then high school, but some of the things that went around the building would put a cheerleader's vindictive imagination to shame.
"I ain't a gossip!" snapped Morgan. "I know what my Baby Girl wants."
"FBI playboy of the year knows what women want other then a good lay?" laughed Lynch. "I find that hard to believe."
"I know you don't string a lady along for four years! No woman wants to be just friction for that long Lynch! I might not be an expert on relationships but I know how to respect a woman. Even if I was that much of an idiot I would know that Garcia deserves better than that."
Lynch sniggered. "You mean she should have you."
"No! Did you forget to turn on your ears this morning, or is your head really that far up your ass? I am telling you that Penelope wants a sparkly pink ring on her finger man."
The words she had said on the phone just kept replaying in his head. He knew that she had asked him not to do do anything, but she had sounded so hurt when she said she got nothing while Prentiss had gotten an engagement ring and a wedding of sorts in less then two year. Morgan just wanted to make her happy again. Lynch needed to know that Garcia deserved something to show for dating him for four years.
"What's your angle here?" Lynch demanded.
"Excuse me?"
"I hear the way you two talk to each other. I see the way Penelope looks at you. What are you trying to pull?"
Morgan wanted to slap this kid. He thought Reid had a thick head, but Lynch was truly an idiot. Morgan was trying to tell him how not to lose Garcia and Lynch was brining up his friendship with her. They did flirt when they were together, that's all it was. He would never do anything while she was dating someone else. All he wanted was for her to be happy, even if it was with Lynch; who he was beginning to realise was stupider and stupider by the second.
"She is my friend, that's all. I would do this for any friend of mine who was hurting," Morgan sighed. "Penelope is like a sister to me, and despite what you might think I want her to be happy. That's why I flirt with her it makes her smile while she is surrounded by horrendous images a lady like her should never have to see."
"She gives me the same line! I just wish she didn't encourage you and flirt back. I do make her happy Agent Morgan. I might not have as much experience with women as you do, but I know how to address a woman's needs."
"It's not a line. Dude, seriously I do not want to think about your sex life. Stop. Now. I am telling you she wants more my man. She is happy but she'd be thrilled if she was a soon to be married lady."
"Why you telling me this?"
"I told you I want her to be happy," Morgan repeated. "For some reason you seem to make her happy. Although I have no idea how or why since you are clearly the most clueless man who has ever walked this earth. She wants something more from you."
"Don't tell me what to do with my girlfriend. Penelope is not ready to marry me."
"What the hell does that mean?"
"It means just as it says. I know what she wants, and we're not ready for that."
"I know what I heard. You may be not be ready for that, but I know that she is. She was pretty pissed that you haven't made one big gesture. She wants that," Morgan assured him, not even sure why he didn't just walk away from Lynch and never turn back.
"I can't do that as long as you're around."
"What the hell? You are not actually saying that!" he snapped. "You are not going to make another move with Penelope unless I leave? I hate to break this to you Lynch, I ain't going anywhere. So how about you grow some nads and make your woman happy. Quit making lame excuses and tell her how you feel."
"She'll always wonder what she is missing by not bagging you."
Morgan rolled his eyes. "You really are a fool."
"Because I know that you are trying to make slip up and do something stupid?"
"I was trying to help you keep her. But you're too thick to realise it. Don't say I didn't try to help when the most amazing lady you will ever meet walks out of your life. I honestly don't know why she hasn't done it sooner."
Morgan stood up, and left the small break room, and returned to his desk. He couldn't believe he had actually went and talked to Lynch, and he hadn't even listened. He really did want Garcia to be happy, even if that meant she was with Lynch. He just hoped Lynch would pull his head out of his ass and realise that he was serious.
Lynch returned to his desk, still not believing that Morgan had come up to talk to him. It must be a slow day at the BAU. Lynch honestly wasn't sure what he wanted from Garcia. When they had started to see each other it was because he needed to meet her. After working on her system had to know her. He never thought that anything serious would develop between them.
He couldn't believe that he had actually been dating her for four years. Part of him wanted something more, but a bigger part of him was scared. Lynch wasn't ready to settle down in Quantico, he wanted something bigger and better. But he knew that Garcia was happy where she was, and she considered the BAU her family. He knew he could not take her away from that. He sighed deeply and returned to his work station. Although he knew he could easily go down to talk to her and tell her what she needed to know, he didn't.
Instead he logged onto an instant message programme that they used at work which didn't compromise security. He sighed when he saw her screen, "The Divine Miss P" pop up and say hello. He knew that this was the coward's way out. Lynch just wasn't sure if he could deal with Garcia's BAU big brother breathing down his neck again. He knew that if he did this face to face he would change his mind when she got upset. He had to do it this way, and then hide quickly. Penelope Garcia was a force to be reckoned with and he did not want to be on the receiving end of her rage.
It had been a couple of hours since Morgan had gone up to talk with Lynch. He was surprised not to see the young technical analyst come down and slip into Garcia's office. Morgan was working on paper work, as was the rest of the team since it was fairly slow. No cases had come in yet, although he silently wished one would. He hated days where they were all hanging around the office; especially when Garcia was holed up in her office.
Even Prentiss and Reid had let their guard down, on the slow day. Morgan was actually happy to see them acting like a couple out in the open. Prentiss was sitting on Reid's desk comfortably as he rambled away statistics. He couldn't hear everything they were saying, but it was mostly about work. Prentiss had kicked off shoes and Reid was absent-mindedly massaging her feet one at time as they spoke.
Morgan was surprised that Garcia was had not come out to join the rest of the team she liked to socialise when she had the chance. Normally be out mingling with her friends when it was like this. Sometimes she would get caught up in playing a computer game, but it had been almost three hours since she had even left her office to get a coffee or use the washroom. Morgan knocked gently on Garcia's office door then let himself in.
"Hey Baby Girl why you holed up here when we all wanna see that pretty face?" he asked, going over and massaging her shoulders as she frantically typed away.
He was surprised to see that her hair was down. There were a lot of trinkets missing from her desk. She was sitting at her computer deleting some files. She turned around when the touched her. He discovered that her eyes were red and puffy, like she had been crying for a while. There was a pile of Kleenex by her desk. Her office just wasn't in the same state of almost obsessive compulsive order it normally was. There was something seriously wrong with her.
Morgan felt his stomach knotting knowing that he might have something to do with her current misery. If something had had happened to one of her brothers someone on the team would have known. The only other people who could make Garcia cry were all working on other things. Only Lynch was unaccounted for, and Morgan knew he was the who had talked to him a few hours before, around the same time he had last seen Garcia emerge from her office.
"Baby Girl what's going on?" he asked.
"Kevin," she whispered.
"What happened?"
"He just told me that he couldn't do this anymore."
He went over and pulled her into a tight hug. "I'm so sorry sweet thing. What can I do to help?"
"This helps," she whispered, making herself cozy in his arms.
He kissed her forehead. "I didn't even see him come down here. When did he do it?"
"He didn't even have the balls to tell me to my face. He sent me an instant message. How much of a loser do you have to be to get broken up with through instant message? I feel so stupid right now. I didn't even seen it coming. I was so excited when I saw him pop up, then bam! Bye bye Garcia."
"He probably knew you'd kick his sorry ass mama."
She laughed a little, despite herself. "Well now I just want to destroy his cyber universe even more. If he can't respect me enough to tell me to my face, well then I have some tricks up my flowery purple sleeve."
"What are you doing over there silly girl?" He looked at her screen, her fingers were once again typing frantically.
"Well I may have just hacked his WOW account. Woopsy think I might have deleted it, now how did that happen?" She let out a small evil giggle. "By the way hope you weren't looking to find him again online. 'Cause you can no longer has a profile facebook, myspace or twitter. Well his name does come up but all you'll get is profiles of really adorable puppies who need good homes. Do you really want to bore you with all the geeky details?"
He gave her a funny look. "No I guess not. Just don't do anything illegal okay? I don't want to have to be the one to investigate this."
"Even if I did they'd never find me. Come on Pretty Boy you know I can do anything online and never get caught, at least not by the likes of Kevin Lynch. He has nothing on the Divine Miss P's amazing and epic cyber skills."
"Baby Girl, promise me."
"Fine, you're no fun my lovely chocolate god, but I promise. I just wish I knew why he suddenly just told me he was done with this. I thought things were going well. I was even considering popping the question myself."
Morgan was not surprised to learn that Garcia was the kind of woman who would take matters into her own hands in a relationship. It would have been something else to hear Lynch's reaction to the bubbly Garcia asking him to marry her. Although judging by Lynch's reaction to the conversation they had had early he was glad that she hadn't. She would have been crushed when he told her no. Although the little worm probably would have said something evasive and then promptly found a screen to communicate his intention to run away from her.
"That boy would have dropped dead," he laughed. "You have to have yourself a strong man who is not afraid to take a hit to the ego to propose to him."
"That's why I never did it. I thought that he'd get to it eventually. But I never thought in a million years that he'd just quit. Sure I didn't have a ring on my finger but at least I didn't have to go home to a lonely apartment."
"I'm so sorry Penelope." He kissed her forehead softly.
"I just wish I knew what changed. Everything was fine before we left for work this morning. He just popped online and tells me it's over then disappears. No explanation, no anything. He just left. I feel so stupid right now."
"You're not stupid, Baby Girl, not even a little bit. I'm the stupid one. I went up there and talked to him," admitted Morgan.
"You what!?" she demanded.
"What you told Prentiss you wanted more on the phone last week. I couldn't get it out of my brain. You sounded so upset when you said. It just bugged me so much that you wanted more from him. I just wanted you to be happy. So I went up there and found him. I told him he should do something big to show you how he felt. Breaking up with you wasn't exactly what I had in mind. I thought he'd take his balls out of desk drawer and show you how he really felt about you."
"I was happy!" she snapped. "Sure, I wanted something more but I know Kevin is a lot slow so I just kind of dealt with it. I just waited for him to figure it out, and tried to give him subtle unscary hints. I was grumpy and PMSey when I said that. I didn't think you'd take me so seriously, and talk to Kevin!"
"I didn't know that. All I wanted was for you to have what Prentiss has, like you said you wanted. I thought I was helping. Penelope, you have to believe me."
"I do believe that you were trying to be helpful. But that doesn't change the fact that now I'm gonna be a crazy cat lady!"
"I'm sorry I didn't realise. I thought I was helping. Come on now don't say that Baby Girl. You are far too pretty and quirky to ever be a crazy cat lady."
"You know something, Derek? I'm really not in the mood for this right now!" she snapped.
"Not in the mood for what Gorgeous?"
"Our usual flirty banter," she sighed, fighting tears. "I know you want to make feel better, but at the end of the day I'm just going to end up feeling worse."
"Woah, woah, Penelope why would this make you feel worse?"
"'Cause you tell me all these amazing things about how pretty I am, and how much you love me and you boost my ego. I get all happy thinking that you love me or something. Then I go home alone to a possible cat now instead of Kevin. While you go off and bring home some fake breasted toothpick."
"First all those things I tell you are the truth Pretty Lady, but I can stop if you really want me to. Second I am a little insulted that you of all people think I am so shallow. In case you missed it I have tried to seriously date a few very smart ladies in the past few years. I guess you missed that while you shaking up with Lynch."
Garcia could not believe her ears. "I guess I don't really want you to stop. Those things you say make me feel all fuzzy inside. I guess I haven't really been paying much attention to the people you have been dating. I did not realise that my handsomely childish vision was growing up right under my nose. But the million dollar question is if you are dating classy ladies how the hell are you, Mister Amazing, still single?"
"Maybe it's cause all the ladies I have been dating don't have anything on the one lady I can't have," he replied.
"That doesn't really help that whole going home to my possible cat. Or cats. I think I'll start with two and see how that that goes. One will be black and the other one will be white and I'll call them Salt and Pepper. How is that for being a crazy cat lady, especially if the black one is Salt!"
"Woman you are crazy!" he laughed. "What makes you think that that you will be going home alone? You might just know the lady that's got my head all twisted around so I can't fall in love with anyone else."
"Who is she that had you all confused my sweetness? I'll kick her ass!"
"That might be a little hard silly girl."
"Why's that? This isn't some Oedipus thing is it? Cause seriously that's just creepy and I always pegged you as one of the normal ones. Well as normal as anyone can be why the possess a "Y" chromosome of suckiness."
Morgan laughed. "It's not an Oedipus thing. For such a smart woman you can be a little dense sometimes sweet thing. You can't hurt this woman, unless you are into self mutilation, Beautiful. Although with all your "Y" chromosome bashing I am starting to think you might be more interested in some with two "X" chromosomes."
"Well boys really do suck and kind of smell, but girls are just bitchy. I can't handle that. That would make me a kind of bad crazy cat lady, cause cats are kind of bitchy too-" she stammered, then processed what he had just said.
"Hello, earth to Garcia, do you need your ears cleaned out? Quit talking about being a cat lady. I will never let you become one. I just told you that you are the reason my head's all messed up."
"The gorgeous women you date are not living up to little ol' moi?" she asked, blushing a little, trying to keep her emotions in check. "As much as that makes me all fuzzy inside it's gonna make me cry when I'm all alone in my very comfortable queen sized bed tonight."
"You don't have to be alone." He brushed his lips against hers.
For a moment she relaxed into the embrace, but quickly pulled away. "What are you doing?"
"I was kissing you until you started talking again. So hush those pretty lips and enjoy this."
He pulled her into his arms and kissed her again. For a moment Garcia began to relax. Then she realised that she had just told him that Lynch had broken up with her a short time ago, and he was already making his move. She could not deal with Morgan being her rebound guy. If she was going to get the man of her dreams she was going to keep him for a good long time. She just wasn't sure if she was ready to jump into something serious. She pulled away from him again.
"Um, okay, yeah, stop. I just broke up with my boyfriend like not even like four hours ago, and you're trying to tell me that you have changed?"
"The last time I held up on letting you know how I really felt about you, you went and started to date Lynch. I'm not missing my chance this time." He kissed her softly.
She relaxed into the kiss a little longer this time. "You know you could have told me before I wasted four years of my life with him."
"I thought you were happy with him. That's all I have ever wanted for you."
"What about yourself? You said were not happy because the women you were dating weren't, well me, you weren't happy. I want you to be happy too Derek."
"I wasn't unhappy, exactly. I just wanted more, now I have the chance to get that so I'm not letting her slip away again. Although I promise you that was not what I planned when I went to talk to him."
"I know that." She gently brushed her lips against his.
Garcia could not believe that this was real. The worst day of her life was quickly becoming one she had dreamed about for a long time. She was kissing Morgan. Her mind was reeling with thought. You just broke up with your boyfriend. But you are kissing Morgan. This isn't fair to Lynch, he'll say that he was right the whole time. He's a jackass who broke up with you in an IM, enjoy this, Garcia. Morgan says he wants you, take him. She wrapped her arms around his waist. She giggled and pulled away.
"What's so funny?" he asked.
"It just hit me that I am kissing you, in my office no less, and I had my hands on your ass," she giggled. "I know it shouldn't be funny. But my emotions are kind of all over the place right now."
"I'm moving too fast and you're nervous," he explained his profiler mind taking over, as the part of his brain that spoke for his heart was telling him to shut up.
"I don't think it's that my crazy profiler. I am a little overwhelmed right now. I should be upset about Kevin, but I'm not. He's a jerkface and I'm not going to lose any sleep over him. I just can't believe that you're really kissing me."
"I could slow down if you'd like?"
"We can't go much slower then we've been going. I have been flirting with you for eight years now, and this is the first time I've gotten to kiss you. That is plenty slow enough. Now that I have gotten a taste of my chocolate god of thunder I do want to taste anything else. Besides that I refuse to go home alone tonight."
"You won't have to go home alone tonight I promise you that, Sweetness."
He pulled her to him again, this time she didn't fight him. She wrapped her, her hands settling once again on his ass. His hands were in her hair, combing it softly as he kissed her. It started out soft and sweet, but soon became more frantic as they both forgot where they were.
David Rossi poked his head into Garcia's office after hearing a rumour that Lynch had up and left the building in the middle of the day. When he saw the scene in front of him he had a feeling he would not be seeing the young computer geek hanging around again. Good riddens, he thought as he closed the office door carefully so he didn't make a sound and interrupt them. It was about damn time those two admitted they had real feelings for each other. He just hoped they would remember that Garcia's office had a lock if they went any farther in there.
Rossi walked through the bullpen and shook his head when he saw Prentiss and Reid. At least those two had enough self control to not stand around the office and grope each other. It was nice to see Reid letting his guard down a little at work, since it wasn't a secret from their superiors anymore. Prentiss seemed to be very content as Reid massaged her feet as he rambled on about something she had long since stopped listening to. Rossi wished he could get a woman to get that look cross her lips with a just a foot massage. He would have to ask the young genius his secret sometime.
"Someone must be slipping something into the coffee around here," he muttered, going into the break room and pouring himself a cup.
The End
Notes: All right so that is my little plot bunny. I couldn't actually put in the whole thing she said on the phone or it will give away a future part to another story. I hope you have enjoyed this. Please tell me what you thought and thank you in advance. Hugz - trista