Memory Box

It was shortly after that week's campfire ceremony, and everyone was going somewhere. Most of the girls headed back to their cabins except for Bridgette, who went to go play Frisbee with Geoff and Dj. The rest of the guys were either playing Frisbee or at their cabins. Duncan on the other hand, had headed towards the docks. With him, he carried a box. This box didn't look like much on the outside. It was just an old wooden box with some odd color paint. Duncan made sure no one was looking or around him. He opened it. Inside was a collection of pictures and photo's. Most of the photos were of him, with a girl with jet black hair, a heart-shaped face and a button nose. On the back of one photo, which he'd recognized as his mothers writing, was 'Duncan and Delilah, age 5'. He smiled and looked at it. The memory came rushing back.

*~*

It was autumn when this was taken. He remembered that they had gotten back from the craft store and their mother had a surprise. She pulled out a wooden box and some paints. She wanted them to paint a box so they can put their favourite things inside.

"Think of it as a memory box", she suggested as they put on our smocks. They reached for the colours

"I want it to be blue", Delilah said as she reached for the paint.

"No!" Duncan shouted, "I want it to be green".

Delilah stared at him. "Blue".

"Green".

"Blue!"

"Green!"

By then their mom had to step in.

"Kids, why don't you paint it both green and blue?" They thought about it and agreed. The rest of the afternoon was spent painting the box and finding their favourite things to put inside it.

*~*

Duncan, who had been lost in his memories, didn't notice someone was near.

"Duncan?" Courtney asked as she was several feet behind him. He jumped and closed the box.

"Courtney, Jesus, don't scare me like that", He said in a rough tone.

"Sorry, but it's almost curfew and- "

"Fine, I was just leaving!" he snapped, as he got up and walked away, leaving Courtney confused and alone.

*~*

Mornings at camp were always peaceful when the campers got the day off, until now.

"Where are my headphones?!" yelled Duncan as he searched the cabin. The guys stood in silence as Duncan went through his stuff. He had woken up to do his morning push-ups, and found he didn't have his headphones on. Because of all the noise, the girls had come to see what was the matter. Courtney stepped in.

"Duncan is there a problem?" she asked with hesitance. Duncan turned to look at her.

"Yes, princess, there is a problem, my headphones are gone, now piss off!" he yelled as he began to rip open Dj's mattress. She stood in shock and backed away.

"Someone's having an Eva moment", muttered Heather under her breath. Duncan didn't hear her. By that point, Chris and Chef came. Chef took Duncan and led him to the fish cabin. It was a surprisingly silent walk. When they got there, Chef told him he was to spend a day there to calm himself. Duncan waited until Chef had left before growling and kicking over the bait bucket. He sat down and took some deep breaths. Sometime later, Chef gave him some 'breakfast'. By what seemed about ten-thirty, he heard a knock at the door. He jimmied the lock and opened the door. Sitting on the ground was a familiar box wrapped in a sweater. He grabbed it and closed the door. He stared at it before opening it. Everything was the same way he left it. He reached towards a bracelet near the bottom. It was a sick day bracelet as his grandmother had called it. She said that if you make it for someone who's sick and wish for them to get better, the bracelet will absorb the sickness and the person would be better. The story behind this one appeared before him.

*~*

"Now, make the knot", instructed Duncan's grandmother as he put the finishing touches on his present. He worked hard to make it special for Delilah, as she had come home coughing and saying she had a headache the day before. "There, you're done, now you know what to do", she said with a wink. Duncan wished with all his eight year old might, that Delilah would get better. "Now go give her it", Grandma said as he finished. Thanking her, Duncan ran up the stairs to Delilah's room. Delilah was in her bed, reading a book. Duncan walked up beside her and gave her the bracelet.

"One of Grandma's sick day bracelets! Thanks Duncan", she said, giving him a hug. She tried it on, and it was a perfect fit. She especially liked it because it was blue.

"I hope you get better, Sis".

"Me to, Duncan. But the bracelet should help." She said with a smile. It helped, but only for a little while.

*~*

Duncan grasped the bracelet and put it down. He turned his attention to a drawing. It was a coloring page that was folded and torn. Even though he didn't want to revisit this memory, he saw it anyway.

*~*

They were at a doctor's office in Edmonton. He was waiting with his mom and dad in the waiting room. While Duncan coloured a picture of elephant, out of boredom, his parents waited in silence. Then the doctor came in. He asked that my parents come with him. Duncan asked to go to. He wanted to know why his sister had been sick for so long. His parents were reluctant. They told him to stay put and wait. About ten minutes later, Delilah came out. He hugged her; even though a ten year old couldn't do that (It was an image thing). She told him she had gone though lots of weird tests while she was in there.

"Like a mad scientists lab? " Duncan asked, elbowing Delilah.

"Sure, now I'm going to turn into a zombie every night and eat your brains", she replied in a sarcastic tone. They laughed at the remark. They were too busy laughing, because they hadn't noticed their father had returned. He was flushed as he asked them to follow him. They were led into a room with lots of plaques and chairs. Their mom looked as though she had been crying. Duncan wanted to ask what was wrong, but was stopped by the doctor asking them to sit down. They took a seat and he began,

"Well Delilah, your tests have come back and they don't look so good", he said as he looked at a file. "You have been sick for two years, is that correct?" the doctor asked. Delilah nodded.

"None of the doctors could tell what was making me sick all the time", she spoke in a quiet voice.

"Well, that's because they didn't have the right equipment. Now, I checked your white bloods and I found that they are quite different from regular cells. And I also found that your immune system is weak, very weak. From these characteristics and the test results, I can conclude that you have ..." What the doctor said next changed Duncan's life forever.

"Chronic leukemia".

Suddenly, the world came to a halt. Duncan's mother burst into tears and his dad went to comfort her. Duncan looked from them to the doctor, who stayed motionless and silent as he watched them. Then he looked at Delilah. A single tear rolled down his face as he saw her. She sat there, with several emotions on her face. Confusion. Fear. Anger. Sadness. Worry. Duncan couldn't bear to see her like this any longer. So he ran. He ran out the door, out of the hospital and onto the grass of the park across the street. And he cried for what seemed like ages. He cried until he couldn't anymore.

*~*

Duncan wiped away a tear as he carefully put the picture back. His eye moved towards an old pocket knife. He remembered the story behind this was a little happier.

*~*

It was almost Christmas time and Delilah had been staying at the hospital for almost a week. The Rollins had decided on having Christmas early. They all gathered in Delilah's room and gave out presents to one another. Mr. Rollin received a new GPS system while Mrs. Rollin got a new holster for her gun at work (both parents are police officers). Duncan had saved up his allowance to get something for Delilah.

"An IPod!" she shrieked as she unwrapped her present. "Well now I feel bad because my gift to you isn't so nice", she said as she handed hers to him. He opened it. Inside was a new pocket knife that had about 8 features including a flashlight. He smiled. Delilah knew that the pocket knife he had gotten from his older brother Derek, who was in military training then, was dull and only was a pocket knife. Without hesitation, he hugged his twin sister and thanked her. She just smiled and hugged him back. They both took turns telling each other how there presents worked the rest of the morning.

*~*

He still had that knife, even though the light burnt out and the knife was going dull. He stopped to hear that someone was coming. He closed the box and hid it behind his back. Chef entered,

"Solider, why is this door unlocked?" he asked.

"I don't know, I never left the cabin", Duncan replied, still making sure the box was well hidden.

"Well I'll be checking up on that maggot!" Chef yelled as he placed 'dinner' in front of him, before he left and locked the door behind him. Duncan looked at it and placed it with his other meals. He turned his attention to the box again. There were about three photos' that were taken in Delilah's hospital room. This memory was the one Duncan hated the most of all.

*~*

She had been at the hospital for two months when the pictures were taken. Duncan had come straight from school to visit her. With him, he brought his math textbook and his homework.

"Hey, Sis", he knocked as he entered the room.

"Hey, Duncan", she answered from her bed. She was wearing the blue and black bandana that Duncan had got for her. "How's the math homework coming along?" she asked as he pulled up a chair to her bed.

"Good, but I still don't understand this one question".

"Well, we'll worry about that later. Let's take some photos", she suggested, throwing him the camera.

"Why, you hate getting your picture taken?"

"Because, I said so and I wanted a couple photo`s of us together", she grinned.

"Duncan just shrugged. He asked the nurse in the next room to take the photos. The first one was just of them smiling. The next one was just funny faces and bunny ears. The last one was them posing. They were ready to take another photo but the nurse said the batteries were dead.

"It's ok Duncan. They are good shots though". He agreed. Delilah helped him with his homework and then they hung out for awhile. After what seemed like only a short time, a nurse told Duncan that it was time to go.

"Cant I stay for 20 minutes?" he asked, for they had been playing Scrabble and he was winning. The nurse frowned. He was allowed 5 minutes to say goodbye.

"Goodbye, Delilah", Duncan said with a bit of sadness. He hugged her. But she didn't let go for a long time. When she did though, she had tears in her eyes.

"Hey, don't cry, tomorrow's Saturday. I'll be here all day", he reassured her.

"Duncan, promise me you'll always be good and never stop enjoying life." She said in serious tone.

"You know, I always will", he answered. He was slightly confused by the remark, but before he could ask her about it, the nurse had returned to escort him out. As he opened the door, he heard a whisper in a hoarse voice.

"I love you Duncan". He knew what she meant.

"Love you to, Sis". He said as he closed the door. He was met by a cool breeze as he left the hospital. It had to be about 8:00 when he walked in the door. His parents were at work as usual. He found some leftover food in the fridge and watched TV for a while. He headed up to his room soon afterwards. After getting into bed, he considered what his sister had asked him to do. Be good and never stop enjoying life. He wondered why she had hugged him for so long and told him she loved him. He decided to sleep on it. He drifted off into a deep sleep and wished for tomorrow to come.

It was about ten o' clock when awoke. He didn't smell any breakfast cooking. He came downstairs to find no one in the kitchen. He grabbed the whole carton of orange juice and walked towards the living room. He took a sip and was surprised to see his parents were sitting down on the couch.

"Duncan, take a seat son", his father motioned.

"Ok, if it's about the carton, I swear I won't do it-"

"No son, it's about something else. It's about Delilah". Duncan looked at them and sat down.

"Has she started to respond to the treatments again?" he asked.

"No, its", He hesitated, "just that, well, she's gone, son. I`m sorry".

At first, Duncan looked at them like they were joking. But the tears in his mother`s eyes said otherwise.

``No, she was fine yesterday. She was ok``, Duncan said in disbelieve. Then he understood. The promise, the hug, the change in behaviour. It all made sense. But Duncan still couldn`t believe it. `` No! `` He screamed as he ran out of the house. He ran to the hospital. He ran passed everyone stopping at her room. He opened it to find it empty. All the machines were gone and the bed sheets were clean. He looked at the bed and collapsed. He cried into the sheets, more than he had when he first heard the news. After a very long time, he felt a hand on his shoulder.

``Let's go home, son``. He stood up and followed his father. They passed the nurse that had taken the photos. She just looked at the floor. They walked out of the hospital to the car. The ride home was a silent one. When they got in the door, Duncan's mom hugged him.

`` Honey, we have to talk``. Duncan followed her into the kitchen. `` Now honey, we know this is tough on you but we need to explain. After Delilah's first couple of treatments, the doctors told us that she wasn`t responding to them, so we tried again, with no change. The doctors only gave us two options. Either put her on a stronger and more painful drug, or stop all treatment. We wanted what was best for her, so we chose to-``.

`` You stopped her from getting better?" he questioned.

"Duncan, listen. If we had put her on a stronger drug, she would have been in lots of pain. They said she might not even walk again after the treatments! But ultimately, it was her that made the final decision. She saw how much we were suffering, and what condition she was in, so she asked to be let off all the treatments."

"She did go peacefully", his father said, choking up a little. Duncan nodded. He left the room and walked upstairs, to her bedroom. He looked around to see that everything held a memory of her in some way. He closed his eyes and grabbed something. He threw it on the floor and slid down the wall to his knees. He cried a little and looked up. He had thrown the old memory box they painted so long ago. He went over to it and picked it up. Inside, were some photos of their family, some of both her and Duncan, and a note. He read it in silence.

Dreams:

To be on a TV show,

To win a large sum of money,

Go to college,

Meet a celebrity,

Get married in the same church mom and dad were married,

Beat this and live a happy life.

He looked hard at the note. He never knew about this list or what his sister goals were, only because she didn't talk about it. He folded the note and picked up the box. He stared at it for a long time before getting an idea. He searched around the room, grabbing photos and anything else that meant something to both of them. After gathering some of the more important ones, he headed back to his room and grabbed his things; arranging them so they all fit inside the tiny box. He was told that this could be used as a memory box, and that's what he intended to use it as. Not just to remember his sister, but to make it seem like she was always there with him.

The funeral was held about five days after her passing. It was supposed to be a small ceremony, but it was nothing like that. People came from all around to play their respects. Nurses, doctor s, kids from school, families who Delilah had babysat for, they all came for her. Even Duncan's older brothers, Matt and Damien, had come home from the war to say their goodbyes. The ceremony was open casket. As Duncan walked by, he noticed she was wearing her favourite blue dress. Her hair was left in ringlets, which framed her perfect face. With him, he brought a white rose and placed it by her folded hands. She looked so peaceful, like she was only sleeping. He stared at her for one last time and walked back to his seat. The minister said a few kind words about her, saying she was a good child who was loved by all. The casket was then closed and brought to the hearse. As the funeral party marched, Duncan held his mother's hand and comforted her. The hearse stopped when they reached the cemetery. His father, brother, and several other men removed the casket and brought it to the grave site. The casket was lowed and the grave buried. Duncan saw that his parents paid no expense for the head stone. It was a huge headstone with tints of blue marble in it. The message on the it, made him sad,

Delilah Ann Rollin

Born March 27, 1992 Died July 15, 2003

A daughter, a friend and a sister,

The one that never stopped living life to the fullest.

The last part of the heading made Duncan cry. He couldn't be there anymore. Leaving the crowd, he walked up the hill to the somewhat older grave sites in the cemetery. He stopped when he reached his grandmothers grave. He sat on the ground next to it and sighed.

"Well, Granny, today's the day. I'm sorry I haven't been here in a while. With all that's happened I just know you'd understand."

He sat on the ground in silence, just staring at the ground. It began to rain after a while. When he heard his mother calling him, he said goodbye and ran down the hill. He joined his family and they walked back to the church. As he passed her grave, Duncan saw the assortments of flowers were drooping under the weight of the rain. He noticed the sun appeared out of the clouds while it was still raining. The sky was filled with an assortment of colours, the most vibrant was blue. He smiled at this, but only a little bit.

*~*

Duncan wiped away his tears as he tried to get back up. But his legs had fallen asleep and he found it difficult to walk at first. The sky was black when he looked out the window. He went to the door and tried the knob and to his surprise, he found it unlocked. He walked out with the box in hand. He didn't think he could return to his cabin just yet. He went to the campfire to find it had burnt out already. He made his way to the docks, noticing that someone was already there. Courtney was sitting by the edge with her feet in the water with a frown on her face. Duncan walked up beside her.

"Courtney?"

She looked at him with fear.

"What", she asked.

"I want to apologize for my behaviour over the past few days. I was a jerk, and I'm sorry". She looked at him with big eyes. "And by the way, here's your sweater back", he said, throwing it to her. She was about to ask him but he replied.

"I noticed you wearing it the first night we came here'.

She placed it beside her and smiled.

"So why is that box so important to you?" she asked curiously. He explained everything to her, who his sister was, how his sister died, how much he missed her. Even how he went to juvie.

"I had a rough time after she died. I started disobeying my parents, changing who I was; I even got all these piercings and a tattoo without them knowing for a week. Once, I got into a big fight with this guy from school who was talking smack about her. I had my knife on me so I stabbed him. He was ok, but his family pressed charges and was found guilty. After a year and a half in juvie, I was watching an ad on TV and they were looking contestants for a new reality show. I thought that if Delilah couldn't fulfill her dream, I should try, at least to help ease the hurt I felted inside. I made an audition video and sent it in. Two weeks later, I got the call and here I am", he finished. Courtney had been listening quietly and was amazed by what he told her. She never knew that he had a soft side, let alone cared about anyone before. She smiled at him, thinking that he was an ok guy after all. He returned the smile and asked if she wanted to walk with him.

"Sure, but can we go to the mess hall first?"

"Sure, but why?"

"Just trust me", she winked. They raced to the mess hall to find all the lights were off. Courtney went in before Duncan, who went to find the light switch. When he found it, he flicked the lights on. He was greeted with a loud 'SURPRISE' from his fellow campers. They had decorated the hall with streamers and balloons. A large sign hung from the rafters, spelling in giant letters, happy birthday. Duncan had forgotten all about his birthday. He walked over to his friends, getting pats on the back and hugs as he said hello to them all. He noticed a huge cake beside a mountain of presents. Then he felt someone was patting his shoulder. He turned to face his parents, who were waiting to greet him. His mother instantly hugged him tightly. His father just shook his hand (they didn't have a good relationship after Duncan went to juvie).

"Come on Duncan, blow out your candles", Geoff hollered.

"Hurry, I want cake!" Owen added.

"Make a wish, Duncan", Courtney said as she lit up the candles. Duncan thought about it and blew out his candles. Everyone cheered, even Heather. They all got a piece of the cake and they started giving out presents. Duncan was happy with his gifts, even the gum Heather got him. He still had one thing on his mind.

"Where are my headphones?"

"Oh yea, here you go man" Chris threw them to him.

"We needed a reason for you to not come near the hall without seeing your party", Bridgette replied.

"And making sure you got in trouble was the only way", Gwen told him.

"We're sorry, dude", Dj added.

Duncan understood. The rest of the evening was spent partying with his friends and family. By the time it was time for his parents to go, everyone was tired. Duncan waved goodbye to his parents as they left on the boat. Everyone was heading to their cabins, except for Courtney who stayed with Duncan at the dock.

"How was your birthday?"

"It was awesome, thanks again for doing that", Duncan gave her a hug. Then he frowned.

"What's wrong?"

"She would have been seventeen today", Duncan said looking up at the sky. Courtney knew that he was still hurt about her.

"But, don't you think she'd want you to be happy?"

"I guess. Hey look, a shooting star", he pointed at the sky.

"What are you gonna wish for?" Courtney asked curiously.

"Nothing, it already came true", he answered putting his arm around her. They spent the rest of the evening talking and looking up at the stars.

~Fin~

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