A/N: I know bad bad Zoot! But what else was I supposed to do? It needed to be written and I just had to do it. Plot bunnies are such horrible, evil, carnivorous things. We must use the Holy hand grenade of one-shots to destroy them. Wow three Monty Python references....I feel special.

Just a Dream

Rachel Barbra Berry Puckerman stood in front of the Temple's doors and tried desperately not to think about the last time she had been there. She spread her shaking hands over her black satin dress and made herself not think about the white one she had worn in exactly this spot three years ago. How innocent she had been. How naïve. To think that he was going to return to her.

Rachel choked back a sob and squared her shoulders. She could do this. She had to be strong. For him. He had always hated it when she cried. She clenched her hands into fists and began striding determinedly toward the Temple's doors. As she got closed they flew open and she felt the rush of anguish that was coming from within. The tears began to burn her eyes again and she blinked furiously, trying to hold them back. She could do this. She could walk into that room with her head held. She would not sob or cry or scream. He never liked her overly dramatic side anyway.

She stepped over the threshold and quickly pulled her veil over her eyes. Even if she did start to tear up no one had to see it. As soon as she came into sight the military band blared their trumpets. She winced at the way they seemed to pull at the giant hole in the center of her chest. She placed one black gloved hand over her heart, checking to see if it was still there as she took in the wash of black clad bodies that currently inhabited the room. She took one more step inside and the loud talking turned into to hushed whispers.

" There she is."

"Poor dear."

"...never coming back..."

"...so young..."

"It's sad really..."

"...doesn't look sad...."

"...shock maybe..."

The whispers angered Rachel. They had no right to speculate about her. It wasn't their husband who had died. A quiet sob escaped her throat. But they were right. He was never coming back. The painful hole in her chest seemed to grow. Why did he have to go? He was supposed to come home and they were going to have three children while she worked on her Broadway career. Now he would never be there to see her shows or watch any of the children they could have had grow up.

She quickly reached a hand up and wiped at the tears that were threatening to fall. She was stuck here without him. Forever. Her lungs seemed to constrict and it felt as though she had to force air into her body. Oh how she wished she was somewhere else. Watching from the distance as some other woman felt the pain blast through her body when they told her he was never coming home. Oh how she had hoped and prayed that all of this agony and brutal sadness was just a dream.

Today proved it was not. Today proved that she would never see that goofy, perfect smile of his again. She would never feel his arms holding her tight at night, or never hear him laugh or cry or yell or even speak again. Rachel froze in her ascent up the aisle. She would never here her beloved Noah sing her to sleep ever again.

A quiet cry escaped her throat and she leaned heavily on one of the benches lining the aisle. The tears that had been trying to escape began rolling down her cheeks. She would never hear him sing again, ever.

"Rachel?" She looked up at Quinn when she felt her soft hand on her arm. "Rachel they need to give you the flag. Don't give up you can make. Your strong that's what he loved about you." Rachel stared at Quinn then at the tiny girl standing next to her. Noah's hazel eyes stared back at her and another sob escaped her throat. Quinn quickly pushed her daughter out of Rachel's sight and urged Rachel gently down the aisle. Rachel didn't budge. Quinn and Noah's daughter was all that was left of her husband. The last fragment of Noah Puckerman left on this Earth. "I'm so sorry Rachel." Was all Quinn said as she pushed her away and faced her forward again.

Rachel tripped and stumbled the rest of the way to the front and took her seat as the rabbi began to drone about Noah's soul and the hurt that his loss has brought down on everyone. Rachel ignored it all as she tried to keep her sobs quiet and her pain to herself.

Suddenly everyone was standing and singing heart wrenching songs. Rachel tried to keep up but her voice cracked and broke and almost every word was interrupted by a gasp or a sob. She had to be strong. She had to get through this. Once the songs and such were over, she and Mrs. Puckerman remained standing and they were both presented with folded flags to honor Noah's service in the military. Rachel clutched it tightly and sat down quickly as she felt the world sway around her.

The band began to play again. A quiet song with a slightly upbeat tone. The dam broke when Rachel realized that Finn must have asked them to play Sweet Caroline.

"No." She whispered. She then got up from the bench and threw herself at the coffin that held her beloved Noah. " No! Please no! Please. He must come back. He has to. He can't leave me here all alone." She beat her hands on the coffin. "Please Noah. Please come back to me! I need you!" She felt hands tug her away and she was pulled into the arms of her fathers. They whispered soothing words to her as she sobbed agonizingly into her chest.

"Everything going to be fine." They kept saying. She wanted to yell and scream at them. She wanted them to know how wrong they were. How could everything be fine when he was never coming back? But she couldn't. All she could do was hang in their arms and sob.

Because this wasn't a dream and Noah Puckerman was never coming home.

It's like I'm, looking from a distance, standing in the background
Everybody's saying, he's not coming home now,
This can't be happening to me
This is just a dream

A/N: I just wanted to fix a few things and add the lyrics at the bottom.