The Better Half of the Day is Night
Yosuke
Drama/Romance

AN: Out to save the world, one fanfiction at a time. I'm serious, I've been rather disappointed with most writers' attempts lately. It's like the definition of a short story got lost somewhere and now everyone just writes the first thing that comes to mind, and as soon as they run out of juice, they put a "The End' on it and post it. I'm so sad. I love reading good anime short stories aka FANFICTION. I wish there were more good stories out there that were also well-written.

So here's my contribution to the short story world, and hopefully will fall in the (at the least) "mediocre" category, but I'm really trying for "good" or "great". I have faith in myself. Ra ra ra.

So while KuroxFai is great and all, I always love the originators. While some people speculate that Kurogane and Tomoyo's relationship is purely sibling-like love, I choose to believe otherwise. They're THE most perfect couple in the series, I don't care what all you yaoi-obsessed brats say. Not every girl is a cockblock, so shut it. Though sadly, I will admit that because this is a KuroxTomo, I'm sure it won't get nearly as much attention as the KuroxFai fics. That makes me a sad panda.

On a happier note, here's the story! Boom shaka laka!

Story takes place before the manga storyline.

Tsubasa not mine.

The bottle was already half-empty. Or half-full. Who cared, the sake was almost gone. Kurogane shook the bottle to test the weight and grumbled disappointedly in response. It wasn't even midnight yet. How was he supposed to get through the next half of the day without fuel? He grimaced a little at his own neediness. While somewhere in the back of his mind he feared he may have been compelling a growing addiction, he pushed those thoughts aside as he checked his sobriety. The room was still stationary. He was fine.

A cold chill had settled into Japan as the end of the year crept ever-steadily closer. Soon it'd be snowing, and he'd stick out like a sore thumb. The trees only offered so many shadows before his skills as a ninja could no longer hide him in the vast fields of white powder. He faintly worried he'd have to switch up attire again like last year. He didn't like wearing white. Black suited him just fine. Like nighttime, his favorite part of the day, where he never had to worry about being around people. The solemnity and silence of the night was a much better companion than any moron here. Every now and then he'd spend the evening with some drinking buddies, but for the most part he avoided his comrades. They talked too much. They probed him for answers to questions he had no intention of speaking about. Most of the time he just wanted to be left alone.

The chill had moved into his room through the open window. He'd removed the window guard, much to the princess's dislike, so that the fresh air could enter more easily. That, and he'd used it earlier as an exit and entrance. It was much more efficient than navigating the hallways. Kurogane shifted his weight against the wall carefully (his back hurt a little) and breathed in the cold air. It was refreshing. He was sure he was running a fever, but he'd learned long ago to dismiss unimportant and temporary hindrances. A fever never held him back before, and he'd be damned if he let it now. But somewhere, again rooting around in the back of his mind, was the curious thought of maybe it would have been better to let the fever cripple him. It might help him sleep his way through this long and insufferable night. Hell knew he needed it. It was the anniversary. The anniversary. Oh so many years ago, a horrible, bloody massacre took place, a moment he'd never forget, never wanted to forget. Though it often weighed heavy on his heart that he had been unable to do more when the slayings took place, somewhere inside of him he knew it kept him going. It was the sole reason he had joined the Palace Guards, the only motivation he had to keep searching for the person or persons who had killed his parents.

Well, that, he supposed... and one other thing.

He turned his face towards the door politely, beckoning with a small swaying movement of his head. "Come in."

There was a stillness in the moment before the door, already slightly ajar, breezed open. He hardly even heard her footsteps as his princess walked into the room. Tomoyo shut the door behind her and approached the ninja, smiling her usual sweet, oblivious smile. Stopping just a few feet in front of him, she touched her hands together in front of her stomach. "You catch me every time."

"You're loud."

"How so?"

"I could hear you breathing coming up the stairs. You're loud."

She didn't even bother to look offended; she knew he meant nothing by it. Instead, she continued smiling and knelt down in her spot. "Is it alright that I'm here?"

Kurogane scoffed and turned his head away, setting the sake bottle down. Though it was none of his business what the princess wanted or what reason she had to come visit him in his quarters (a bit of a rarity for someone as civilized as her), he silently wished she'd been a little more decent. He was accustomed to seeing her in elaborate robes and expensive kimono, but now she simply wore a white yukata with none of the usual hair ornaments. Her ankles and wrists were also very exposed, which wasn't very ladylike, though rather than be flustered by the exposure, Kurogane brushed it off. It simply meant she trusted his eyes not to wander and that she was comfortable enough with him to be in such a state. The ninja forced his tipsy mind to focus back on her original question. "It's as much your room as it is mine. You have more right to be here than me."

Tomoyo shook her head lightly. "No. If you'd rather be alone, then say so. I don't want to bother you." When Kurogane remained silent, the princess cocked her head to the side. "Does no response mean I have your permission to stay?"

"Do whatever you want!" Uh-oh, maybe he wasn't as sober as he thought. He grumbled loudly and hit his head against the wall behind him. "Just... Fine, stay, whatever."

The girl giggled and relaxed more. "Perhaps you could be spending today in a slightly more productive manner? Alcoholism is a festering habit among my guards, and I'm not too happy with it."

"What would you rather I do then?" He looked at her annoyingly, picking the bottle back up to protect it.

"What you were doing before suited me just fine." The smile on her face suddenly alerted him, and he felt his face get hot. She knew.

"Wait, how did you know--"

The smile seemed to intensify. Kurogane shuddered. Oh, that's right. She had a sixth sense about these things. Just like all individuals blessed with powers beyond that of regular humans, Tomoyo had grown sensitive to energies near her and knew when something powerful approached. He suddenly felt quite embarrassed. He had gone to her window, hanging just out of sight but able to see her completely as the darkness of the evening had settled in. Tomoyo had been talking with her sister for a few moments, then as Kendappa had left, Souma came in to chat up a storm. Kurogane had ignored her and simply watched Tomoyo, tuning out the noisy girly chatter until the princess sent her guard away to be left alone. He thought it had seemed strange for her to suddenly be so antisocial and quiet. She must've realized it then. The ninja was waiting just outside her window, watching her intensely, unmoving in the cold night.

The man realized that maybe his ninja skills weren't quite as up to par as he had hoped, and silently cussed at himself. He'd reprimand himself in the morning, but for the meantime, he was going to drink. He lifted the bottle back up and took another long sip. Tomoyo stared at him before smiling again, this time somewhat shyly. "May I?"

He stopped mid-sip, turning his red eyes to her to stare in confusion. "May you what?"

She offered out a hand. "May I have some?"

This seemed to confound him. Again, not very ladylike. He was silent for a good long minute before putting the bottle back in his lap. "It's sake."

"I know."

Again he was silent. Finally her large curious eyes seemed to convince him and he handed her the bottle carefully. "It's half-empty. Half... full... whichever."

The princess took the bottle graciously and nodded her head in thanks, carefully rising to her feet. He watched her absently, not even registering her movements as she approached the window. Finally something clicked, and Kurogane lurched forward in his spot.

"NO!"

But it was too late, and the princess had begun pouring the remainder of the heavily-scented alcohol out of the open window and to the unfortunate roof tiles below. As the last few drops dripped from the rim, she looked back at her guard with the sweetest look on her face. "Now how did that happen?"

Kurogane stumbled over his words, jaw agape. "W... What do you mean how did it happen?? You coldhearted bastard, that was my lifeline!!"

The bottle was tossed back towards his lap as she walked back to her spot, her long black hair following her like a silk cape. He easily caught it with one hand, though he personally looked like he was about to fall apart. Tomoyo touched her chin lightly. "Well, gosh, y'know, I specifically remember a window guard being there. It was square and wood with rice paper-paneling..." She made a square shape in the air with two fingers. "If that guard had just been there, that may have prevented this little incident." She giggled. "Oh, well. Clumsy me!"

"Clumsy my ass!" Kurogane let the bottle drop from his hand. It hit the ground without breaking and rolled to the side. The ninja huffed angrily and turned his head away from her. "Screw you, I change my mind! Get the hell out of my room!"

"I thought it was as much my room as it is yours."

"Fine! I'll leave!" The man climbed to his feet carefully, wary of his hurt back, and started to storm past her in a fit, but a small hand caught his, pulling on him gently. He stopped, turning his head to look back down at her. Her face was soft and pretty as usual, though her doe-like black eyes seemed to hold concern.

"Are you injured?"

Bah, again with the sensitivity. How she did that was beyond him, but he knew it was no use lying to her. She'd find out one way or another, so he turned his head away to avoid the worst blow. "It's no big deal, I've had worse." Oh, god, he could feel the look her face then. Her eyes had gone wider like she were about to cry and her body had gone completely still. All of this he knew without even looking at her. Kurogane swallowed. "Again, no big deal, I patched it up."

"Let me see."

Ack, no. She'd just overwhelm him with her giant emotional aura until he felt he'd sweat his brain out unless he apologized ten million times. Tomoyo didn't like being kept in the dark about these kinds of things. It was strange; if the other guards were wounded, it often didn't worry her unless it were a life-threatening injury, but if it were Souma or Kurogane, she'd spend the next two days making them feel guilty for not telling her. He used to think it was just her being pesky and pushy, but Souma, for obvious reasons, helped to clear the air about it, and informed Kurogane that it was the princess's true concern masked with said peskiness. She'd be annoying all she had to if it meant neither of them would ever refuse to tell her about an injury again. Kurogane had learned one thing that Souma hadn't, though, and perhaps that was because Tomoyo only seemed to do this with Kurogane: She genuinely worried. Aloud. Her softer side came through and she'd spend the longest time making sure he was actually feeling better. She'd check the injury herself, use whatever portion of her powers she could to help heal it, then personally bandage up the bruising and make sure he didn't sleep on it. And of course the whole while she'd have that ridiculous look on her face like she'd just found out she'd accidentally stepped on a mouse and killed it. It was pretty pathetic, but Kurogane knew it was her way of showing concern and even affection, though the ninja only dared to take some of those thoughts so far.

Reluctantly, Kurogane sat. Cross-legged and with his back to her, he patiently awaited her next instructions.

"Off."

He made a small annoyed sound before pulling open the black robe from above the sash and slipping his arms out of the sleeves. He pushed the top half of the robe down so his torso was exposed, showing Tomoyo the pitiful bandaging job he'd performed on himself with apparently no mirror. Rather than continue with the emotional assault, the princess relaxed and placed her palms on either side of the semi-long gash extending from the top of his left shoulder down to just below his left shoulder blade. The bandage only covered the top half of the injury, and not very well. Her gentle fingers carefully removed the poorly placed bandages, leaving the full effect of the deep scratch to her eyes. Kurogane cleared his throat after a long silent moment. It was rather insulting to show one's back to royalty, even if she had requested it. "You don't have to--"

"It's okay, just give me a minute." Her soft hands braced against his back, pushing just a little as she closed her eyes and seemed to slip into a trance. Kurogane waited patiently, remaining still, almost falling into a trance himself as he felt his back grown warm. There was her power, slowly stitching up the broken skin and clearing the majority of the bruising. As painful as he imagined it looked, it actually felt rather pleasant. The pain was dissipating fast and it was a great relief, though a thought nagged at him. He'd received this injury in front of two other comrades. If they noticed tomorrow that he had no injury left to show of it, they'd grow suspicious, and as they had no doctor that could heal wounds quite like this, their immediate assumption would be the princess. He grew irritated already at the thought. The last thing he needed was their suspicions of a secret romance between himself and Tomoyo, and if the mighty Amaterasu were to catch wind of these rumors, that'd be the end of it.

Still, the healing was nice. Kurogane breathed deep as the power eventually subsided, and all he was left with was a small blemish where the long gash once was. He knew there wouldn't even be a scar, she was that good. The man swallowed his pride and turned his head a little. "Thank you."

Though he couldn't see her, he knew she was smiling sweetly at him again. "It's no problem. Just please tell me next time."

"You know I can't do that."

"And why not?"

"Despite what you may think, injuries like these are unimportant. You have bigger things to concern yourself with than a little scratch. I'm a grown man, I can handle it."

Tomoyo's smile faded as she thought on it. "Well, I suppose you can look at it that way, but that's not the point."

Kurogane turned a little in his spot to stare at her. "What do you mean?"

The princess merely shook her head and closed her eyes. "Nothing. I started thinking aloud."

Again, Kurogane was confused, but didn't push it. It seemed like a rather personal issue, and although it did involve him, he believed it was none of his business. The dark-haired man reached behind him to pull up his robe, slipping his arms through the sleeves once again, but left it open in the front from the sash up. Despite his healed injury, he could still feel the fever behind his skin, making the robe too hot for him. The cold chill in the night air felt wonderful, so he'd have to remain decent until his princess left.

Realizing she wouldn't be walking back around in front of him or leaving the room anytime soon, he corrected himself by turning to face her, scooting back about a foot. Tomoyo was smiling at him. He didn't meet her eyes.

"If you're staying here out of pity, don't. You do this every year and I'm telling you it's completely unnecessary. I'm not going to run away or off myself, so what's the big deal?"

Tomoyo's eyes softened with her smile as she lowered her head a little to stare at the floor, long black strands of hair slipping from behind her shoulders to dangle towards her lap. "I know you wouldn't do anything like that. You're too strong for that. It's just... I keep thinking about how horrible it must be to spend such a sad day alone."

Finally he looked at her.

"I know if I lost someone important to me, I would very much like to be in someone's company, even on the anniversary of such a loss."

Kurogane huffed. "I beg your pardon, but I'm neither dainty nor softhearted. Once you're cast into the world alone, you kinda learn to deal with it, so it's not like it bothers me anymore. They're dead, yes, but I don't need to be reminded by your relentless pitying every year of how sad you think I should feel."

She looked back up at him. Momentarily, her face looked displeased. Kurogane winced inwardly, though on the outside he remained solid in his spot. As much as he snapped at her and threw temper tantrums, talking back like that was not acceptable, and he knew it the moment he saw her face. He finally closed his eyes and bowed his head in apology.

"I am sorry." He hated saying that.

The look on Tomoyo's face eventually melted into one of compassion. So long as he knew his faux pas, she could let it slide, especially on such a sensitive subject. Truth be told, she knew how upset he truly was on this anniversary, much like every other year this day had passed. She'd seen his face in her dreams every year and knew the pain that plagued him. He hid it as best as he could, but his outer strength could only carry him so far before he resorted to his bottle of sake and a night's worth of lonely chatter to no one. He'd send all his apologies and prayers heavenward to his parents, and promises for revenge. It'd take him all night before he'd eventually exhaust himself and fall asleep with no futon beneath him and the bottle still in his hand. It happened every year, no matter how much she tried to talk him out of it. But this year had been different. He'd gone to her window before his drinking binge. He'd stayed outside and watched her for the longest time before eventually heading back to his own room. It struck her curiosity, but also made her happy. Though she knew it would be hard to get him to admit it, she knew he had sought her out for comfort. He didn't really want to be alone this year on this day. He wanted company. He wanted her company.

Kurogane remained with his head down and eyes closed, patiently awaiting her scolding or whatever may come, but instead he felt her soft fingertips on his chin, gesturing for him to lift his head. His eyes opened as she said his name, and he looked back up at her. Tomoyo was leaning forward, trying to bridge the distance between them with one hand supporting her weight on the ground and the other touching his face. Her eyes had gone wide and heartfelt again, like she were going to cry, and as his eyes searched her face for some inkling as to what she was feeling, he could only feel his sobriety slowly crash more and more. It was just a heavy buzz, yes, but still distracting. That last bit of sake was just then hitting him. Oh, no, he was getting himself into a lot of trouble. His eyes drifted. Because she was leaning forward as such, her robe didn't cover her quite as much as it should have, and Kurogane could clearly see down the front of her top. She wasn't graphically exposed, but much more skin was visible, and for godsake he couldn't stop looking. Tomoyo eventually spotted his wandering gaze and smiled a little, then pinched his cheek harshly. The man jolted in his spot. "Ow!! What the hell??"

"What the hell indeed!" The princess sat back, her hand moving to grasp the front of her robe, holding it tight to her chest. Kurogane saw and fought back the blood rushing to his face.

"I'm drunk, you shouldn't even be in here right now!"

"And what if I stay?" She threatened. "What will you do?"

He was definitely intimidated. He was, by no means, drunk enough to try anything, but buzzed enough to imagine it, and despised himself for it. "Nothing. Absolutely nothing." Like always. Nothing. Just stare at her absently, watching her from her window or from a tree, secretly aching but never daring to act on it. He'd do nothing.

The princess seemed to notice the pain replacing the agitation, and softened her gaze once more. Poor Kurogane. Spending this night alone would be even harder for him now if she left him. It was a good thing she didn't want to.

Once again, with his gaze elsewhere, anywhere but near her, he felt her hand on his face. He hardly dared to look back at her, but she eventually coaxed him to. Both hands touched his face as she scooted closer, staring sternly up into his red eyes.

"Kurogane... Why were you outside my window today?"

The question seemed to catch him off-guard. He knew she knew why... She just wanted him to say it out loud, like she was daring him. He hated this. He felt trapped. If he gave her the real reason, added to his impaired judgment, he was just asking for big sister Kendappa to kick his ass good. But the look in the princess's eyes, just like always, seemed to make him surrender, and he relaxed his body a little. "Just... wanted to check on you."

"Liar."

"That's not a good enough reason? Fine. I just wanted to check in on you and Souma."

"Kurogane."

"... And your sister?"

"Stop it."

"What do you want me to say? I was fending off misquitoes from invading your room or I was waiting to save you just in case your roof suddenly caved in? Take your pick, I'm fine with either." His gaze was slowly becoming more and more defensive. That trapped feeling was starting to suffocate him; he needed to break away from her, but the lock she had on his eyes arrested any attempts.

They were both still for several moments, trying to figure each other out through their eyes before Tomoyo raised herself to her knees, still holding the ninja's face. Kurogane jerked a little, her body suddenly so much closer. It made him uncomfortable, and he tried to back away, but she hooked one hand around the back of his neck while the other remained on his cheek. Leaning in closer, she kissed his forehead, noting at the warmth of it from his fever.

Kurogane was stuck. His body didn't know how to react, and his mind was screaming ten million commands he just couldn't comprehend. This was most certainly improper, and he'd be hanged if anyone caught them. But he knew he couldn't refuse her, and knew even more than he didn't want to.

Tomoyo slid her hand back from his neck to his shoulder, balancing her weight on that arm. She ended the kiss and stared down into his uneasy blood-colored eyes. "Why did you come to my window?"

The situation had somehow made the question easier to answer, though Kurogane wasn't sure why that was, and eased himself as Tomoyo's steady gaze and voice comforted him. "You know why."

"Are you sure? Perhaps I've misunderstood. You should tell me just in case."

"Brat..." Kurogane scoffed and lowered his head, staring at the floor. She lifted his chin again, her eyes patient.

"Why?"

"... I just wanted... to see if maybe being with somebody tonight was better than being alone."

"But why me?"

"I dunno..." His sobriety was still crashing. He hated this. It was making him weaker, something he never wanted to be in front of his princess. "You're just... better."

"Than who?"

"Everyone else... You make me feel calm." Dammit... Damn her, damn sake, damn emotional anniversary... He'd said it. Now she'd never let him live that down. He grimaced inwardly but he could feel his lack of inhibitions slowly go down the drain. "You stopped me before... I figured maybe you could stop me again."

That was all she needed. Tomoyo knew what he meant and didn't need to know anything more. Because she had stopped him so many years ago from the rampage he'd gone on, from killing more people and then eventually himself, she was now his ward, his safeguard. She'd been the only one able to calm him after such a horrific incident, and she'd been the one to lay his parents to rest properly. She'd given him everything after he lost everything. Kurogane always thought of her when he became irrational or angry. It calmed him and kept him from making several poor decisions, like drinking himself into a pit of despair. He needed her. He loved her.

No, this was a bad idea, but his sober mind had yet to return, and this so-called "flood" of confessions was overwhelming his judgment. His hands gripped at her waist, holding her in place rather than pushing her away or pulling her closer. His own body had never felt so tense in his life; he was surprised he could breathe. If he were caught, or if Tomoyo was the least bit displeased, she could have him beheaded for these actions. But if it was for this chance, then it was worth it.

He tilted his head to the side and kissed her jaw once, hesitantly, then again, and again. One hand drifted up to clamp onto the side of her neck, pulling her against him as his lips moved deeper into her neck. At first his attention was completely split between his apparent loss of inhibitions and monitoring the princess's reaction. If her hands pushed him in the least, if he heard even the slightest protest from her, that'd be it. He'd end it and probably avoid eye contact with her for the next several weeks.

But she gave no sound or struggle. She simply complied with whatever Kurogane did, as if she were just letting him ride through his drunken phase until he came to his senses. Oh, well. It'd be worth it, though he wasn't fond at all of the idea of defiling his princess like this, but the half-empty bottle of sake had given him a good enough excuse to do it, and he knew he'd mentally reprimand himself for a long time after that night. Well, reprimand may have been an understatement... He was going to hate himself for what he was doing, and he'd be more than lucky if Tomoyo somehow didn't feel the same after tonight.

The hand on her neck slid up, a thumb pushing her chin up carefully until her head tilted back fully, and he once again pressed starved kisses to her throat, hardly daring to bite (for every hickey Kendappa found, Kurogane would probably lose a finger). So he could only kiss her, just barely holding onto the last dregs of his self-control. But it was becoming increasingly harder; he felt her neck thrum from a soft noise she'd made. At first, he readied himself to be pushed away, but waited and discovered it had been a soft sigh. She was pleased. Her hands were busying themselves, one gripping at his robe and holding her weight against his shoulder, while the other sifted through his hair, tangling her fingers in it while making another soft sound. Kurogane grit his teeth and tried not to focus on her indirect seduction. His mouth traveled upwards along her throat, his face buried under her chin, too unsure to go any further. Surely she wouldn't approve of that...

But Tomoyo's hand had once again moved under his chin, tilting his head up like she had so many times that night, and he finally found himself staring into her eyes, where she read the exact emotion currently plaguing his mind: worry. He knew what he was doing was wrong and far too forward for someone in his position, and if he displeased her in the slightest, that could very well be the end of his contact with her, which could very well destroy him. But the kind smile she showed in response seemed to nullify that concern he bore, and much to his surprise, she kissed him. It was just a small, steady kiss on his lips, her eyes closed and body still. When she pulled away and looked back into his face once again, she fought back a fit of giggles at the surprised expression Kurogane stared back at her with. It seemed so uncharacteristic of him, and somehow that seemed to please her most of all. She closed her eyes and kissed him again, this time waiting for the ninja to give some sort of response.

For a long moment, there was none. Kurogane seemed to treat it like it were a trap, but after several seconds, the wall holding back temptation crumbled, and he kissed her back fiercely, the hands on her waist pulling her against him determinedly. Tomoyo gave a small sound of surprise, which the man seemed to ignore, but she dismissed the initial shock and slid her hands around her guard's neck, holding herself steady as Kurogane did what he wanted. At first she thought the man had lost all self-control, but immediately realized this was not the case. He was trying so hard to be careful with her. His hands, though gripping her hard, were still on her sides rather than pulling open her clothes or fondling her body as she was sure he was wanting to do. Kurogane would not hurt her, and he would not push this any further than he personally was allowing himself to. He wanted her, that was clear, but he would not allow himself to have her.

Much easier said than done. Kurogane was crumbling, and he hated it. His fingers dug into her side, certainly bruising her by this point, and kept her pulled against him as closely as possible. His mouth pressed against hers fiercely, his hunger desperate and strong. Tomoyo made another small surprised noise when she felt her lips being parted and the man's tongue slip into her mouth. Though this was the first time she'd ever been involved in an intimate situation like this, she gave in happily and allowed her guard to deepen the kiss. Her small hands couldn't stay still, alternating timidly between clutching at the back of his neck and gripping his black hair carefully. She hardly allowed herself to moan or anything more intense than what she had already accidentally let slip out. The last thing she wanted was to seem wanton, and she most certainly had no intention of compelling Kurogane to go any further with this, no matter how badly either of them wanted this.

But it was strange, Kurogane had thought (somewhere in his tipsy, tingling mind). He had never before thought of his princess this way. Sure, somewhere along the line he had played around with the idea of being fortunate enough to be her husband, or at the least her permanent personal guardian, and finally having her all to himself, but never had he delved this far to actually sexually desire her more than anything else. The alcohol was a large factor, he knew (that, and her decision to have an audience with him dressed in such simple and revealing clothing). He almost felt like he had offended himself. He had given in so easily to wanting her this way, he was rather disgusted. He was treating her like a common whore. To obtain the favor of a princess like her took process and time, not a bottle of sake and a little rough foreplay. He was just tying his own noose.

Oh, well. The noose was on, he may as well ride this out to the end, so to speak.

Kurogane continued to kiss her hard, noting her shy movements as he explored her mouth, keeping her body close to his. At some point, he lost track of his own breathing and focused solely on hers, paying careful attention to the way her body arched against his hands and how her chest rose and fell against his. One of his hands finally released her side and slid around her back, holding her more gently as her breathing sped up. Eventually, he felt her back tremble and finally broke the kiss to give her some air. She made one of her small noises as she took in a quick breath, then relaxed against the man more and lowered her face a little. Her weight was almost completely supported by him, her body arched into him as he held her carefully, his fingers twitching a little against the fabric of her robe. She could tell what that meant: He wanted it off, but he wasn't going to. Not just because she wouldn't let him, but because he wouldn't let himself. But if one of them didn't stop him soon, no one would be able to once he cracked.

Tomoyo lifted her head back up again, trying to see into his eyes, but he quickly avoided the dangerous contact and ducked his head to once again hungrily kiss her throat.

"Kurogane..." she called to him softly, trying to bring him back to reality. He wasn't listening. His fingers had wrapped around the sash of her robe, pulling hastily at it until it fell from the yukata. Tomoyo stroked her hand along his cheek. "Kurogane, stop. It's time to stop now." But it was like he didn't want to hear her. The ninja slid his hands up her back, gripping at the shoulders of her robe and pulling inch by inch, inviting the thing to fall from her arms. At some point, Kurogane's mouth lifted from her neck, only to open fully and bear his sharp teeth, mere centimeters from clamping down on the vulnerable throat. He didn't bite her, he wouldn't do it, because not only would it leave a mark that her sister would surely notice, it would cause harm to the princess, something he'd sworn never to do. So instead the temptation intoxicated his mind, filtering his senses as his open mouth, animalistic and dangerous, threatened her with sharp fang-like teeth, hovering, breathing in her lovely perfumed scent. He gave a feral growl and pulled his vicious teeth away, only to resume his affectionate assault on her neck, pressing needy, heated kisses to the flushed skin. They eventually traveled towards her shoulder, and then even further down past her collarbone. Tomoyo, at the risk of setting him off, did not move. She simply stroked his face and called his name quietly, gently drawing him back to real life. "Kurogane, stop. You must stop now."

Kurogane groaned a little.

The princess kept trying, petting his hair, kissing his temple, beckoning him to wake up before they crossed the line. Eventually her voice seemed to reach him, and his daring hands stopped, holding her in place against him and stopping the robe from falling open. He pulled away from her chest, still not looking her in the face as he surveyed the damage he'd done. Her yukata was dangerously close to falling open, and her sash lay on the floor behind her. He noted how far down he had let his mouth travel, and then remained still for a moment to let it all sink in, though he figured later that would be something he'd regret.

The man wasn't quite sure what reaction to give. Oh, heavens, was this embarrassing, yes, but in his defense, he was a little drunk. Nonetheless, it was no excuse for what he'd done, but on the other hand, she was the first one to do any kissing, so based on that small technicality, this should all be her fault, right? Her and her wardrobe... What was she thinking,walking in there dressed like that? She was just asking for his mind to wander.

To blush would be a poor reaction. But to simply walk out and leave her abandoned after being molested hardly seemed mature, then again, he was never one for being mature. Especially around her. So instead, he did the only thing he could think of that wasn't too outrageous or coldhearted. He picked up her sash and tied it back around her waist, leaving her to fix the robe's positioning herself. Then, he politely scooted away from her until there was at least three feet between them. And then, as maturely as he could manage, he fully lifted his head to stare at her in the face, no shame or pride written in his expression whatsoever. He simply sat and awaited her instructions or reprimanding. Tomoyo watched him back, trying to read some sort of feeling in his eyes but finding none. It was almost as if nothing had happened. She wasn't insulted by this, but curious. Surely Kurogane was embarrassed in some way... He really wasn't going to show it? But it finally seemed to register with her why this was. Kurogane had been trained to be devoid of emotions during a mission or a fight. No matter what was happening, no matter who he had hurt or who had hurt him, he was expected to remain unbiased and professional. He was treating this like a mission gone wrong, like the enemy were waiting to see his weakness. He'd be damned if he showed himself crumbling in front of her. And she immediately knew why. He had failed to keep up his strength on his unfortunate day, this horrible anniversary. He'd gone for so long without every having to let his princess see how he really was, how he truly felt on this day, how far down he dug himself into the sadness in his mind. The sake had run dry, and he had been left unshielded in front of her after she'd caught him outside her window. He'd failed his own personal mission, but no matter how thoroughly this troubled him, he would not let it show. It was his way of compensating for his lost strength.

Tomoyo smiled and rose to her feet, walking slowly to Kurogane's side where she lowered herself to her knees and placed her hands on his shoulder.

"Kurogane..."

"Before you get started," Kurogane interrupted her, "let me just say that no matter how forgiving or punishing you choose to be right now, I've already decided that what I've just done is completely unforgivable and thoughtless, and that alone is an understatement. I guarantee you that I am sober now and have seen what I've done, and it was inexcusable. Tell who you like, do what you will with me, but I make you this promise now," he turned his head to stare directly into her wide childlike eyes, "that no matter where you send me or what you will have done with me, I will stay here. My only duty is to protect you, and until the day I am struck down, I will stay by your side and keep you safe." His gaze intensified, as if expecting to be opposed. She already saw what was written on his heart about her, so the underlying message in what he said then should not have been news to her. "You are my priority, I will never hurt you, I will never let anyone else hurt you, and I will never let anyone else prevent me from protecting you."

The words rung deep in her. She understood and complied to his message, knowing just by how sternly he said them that they would hold true.

"And..." Ah, there it was, the shame she had somehow been expecting. It was faint, but it was there in his eyes. "I don't expect you to believe me, I don't think anyone would, but I have never... thought of you... like that before." The ninja finally turned his head away, staring off at a wall. "I mean, I've never wanted to--"

"Kurogane," she stopped him, touching her forehead to his shoulder. "It's okay, you don't have to."

"Yeah, I do. I gotta clear this up. This wasn't supposed to happen."

"Well, now you make it seem like you did want this happen but weren't ready for it."

"That's not it!" He yelled, back to his usual irritated self. Tomoyo smiled at that and giggled. Kurogane huffed. "I've never-- I've never wanted to violate you like that, okay??"

The choice of words made her laugh, and he once again huffed angrily.

"What the hell are you laughing at?? I'm trying to apologize here! Aren't you going to try to send me away or have me locked up or something??"

"Why?" she asked once her giggling died down. Her large doe eyes peered up at his angry red ones. "What difference would it make? It's not like you'd go anywhere. You'd stay here to protect me, right?"

The man's anger dwindled down, remembering what he had said. His face tinted a little as he once again looked away. "That doesn't mean I shouldn't get some kind of punishment. Tell your loving sister, she'll do something about it, right?"

"And why would I start a scandal by my sister's ears? She has enough to worry about, she doesn't need to know."

Kurogane looked back down at her. She smiled. After a long moment, he grunted and looked away again, muttering out a small, almost inaudible "Thanks". Tomoyo giggled and placed a hand on her guard's cheek, drawing his face back around towards her. Leaning up as far as she could, she gave him a small kiss at the corner of his lips, much to his surprise. She stared up into his eyes.

"This is a horrible day for you to spend alone. You don't have to spend it as such, Kurogane." She lowered her hand. "I'm happy that at least this year you managed to find some solace in someone else's company. I'm happier that it was my company."

At this, Kurogane's face once again tinted a little. "I didn't do all of that just to feel better about myself."

"I know," Tomoyo quickly said. "And I didn't allow it just to console you."

The man paused, confused by her words. Again, Tomoyo giggled.

"I hope that next year, maybe you could redirect that strength you use to hide your emotions into strength to face me, and spend this lonely night by my side without a sake bottle. Could you perhaps try that next year instead of having to go through this little mess again?"

"Is this your way of scolding me?"

"Yup." She smiled wider and took a proper seat beside him, one hand hooked on his arm. Kurogane groaned in disappointment.

"I was half-hoping for a kick in my side or for you to at least call me names."

Tomoyo giggled. "Maybe next year." She turned her face up towards him. "Can I tell you something, Kurogane?"

"Hm?" he half-mumbled, still a little disappointed.

"The night seems like such a terrible time. It's the one time of the day where you remember so many things. I don't know why that is, you just seem to automatically remember things from your past that make you so sad. Maybe it's the solitude or how the lack of light makes the atmosphere so glum." She rocked in her spot a little, tapping her head against her guard's shoulder. "But I really like the night. It helps you think. It lets you remember things, even if those things aren't necessarily happy things, it lets you remember. You move forward, just like the day does. It doesn't stay night forever, eventually the sun has to come up, and a whole new list of memories are made, and at night you can reflect on them, find out what you did wrong or what you could've done."

Kurogane watched her carefully.

"Night is a time to reflect, to realize what you're missing." The princess's eyes met his. "That's why the better half of the day is night. It can remind you in so many ways you still exist, and you exist for a reason."

There was a long silence, where Kurogane simply stared at his princess, absorbing the message. "Yeah," was all he could mutter after a moment. He knew he existed for a reason. He'd been allowed to survive that night so long ago so that he could avenge his fallen parents and friends. And the reason he had survived that night was because of Tomoyo, his princess. She had saved him, and that was why he sat there at that moment, watching her, forever able to watch over her.

The princess only watched him, trying to gauge his reaction. She giggled to herself as she thought to maybe tell him that what she had just said was also a metaphor for something else, the person who reminded her of the nighttime, then person who always had her stopping to think about things, about the days she'd spent with him... but instead she simply smiled and rested the side of her head against his arm, closing her eyes, letting the nighttime absorb them as they remained in each other's company. She could've told him, but she decided to tease him about it another day. He'd had enough already.

As Kurogane remained motionless by his princess's side, he once again became enraptured in her presence as he had moments ago when he'd fallen under her spell. The night usually made him feel calm because of the solitude, and that's why he enjoyed it so much. But now, just being with someone else, being with her, made the night seem insignificant. He hardly even noticed the cold in the air or the alcohol slowly leaving his blood stale or the faint ache where his scar had once been. Now it was just himself and his princess. She was all the company he'd need now. He grimaced a little once he thought about it. Was he being weak by letting her see how desperately he needed her with him? After all, he was so used to being alone and she knew that...

Oh, well. He could get used to this, too.

Ze end.

AN: KuroxTomo equals win forever. I would ask "Was this equal to or less than lolicon?" To that, I say screw you. Yes, I made it pretty sexual, whatever. The relationship, however, is fine. CLAMP does stuff like this all the time, a huge age difference between the lovers. I'm not exactly sure how old Kurogane or Tomoyo is, but it shouldn't matter. Love is boundless. So please don't leave reviews about that, leave reviews on the story and stuff that matters, please, and thank you so much for reading!